Chapter two: Location, Location, Location

(One hour and 3 minutes into road trip)

You could cut the tension with a knife. No one moved. No one breathed. For they all knew that if they did…

Dire consequences would follow…

Jimmy had eaten a Mexican feast before leaving.

And they were all going to die.

Six pairs of frightened eyes watched their driver carefully. The poor man looked really uncomfortable. Red face turning redder by the minute. Left hand carefully massaging his gut, trying to ease away the pain. Eyes blinking way to fast because of the sweat that was dripping over his brow.

Jimmy could feel it. It was bubbling in his gut like a firecracker waiting to go off. He did it, Chloe had told him not to, but he still did it. That tempting plate of assorted tacos was just too much.

Jimmy had a bad case of taco induced gas.

And they were all gonna die.

"Guys…I got to let one rip."

One statement. So much reaction.

They moved as one. "STOP THE VAN!"

Unclipped seat belts. Opened doors. Jumped out for the clear air of the outside world.

Unfortunately, not everyone was successful with their seatbelts. Pete scrambled for the release clip and pressed down with all his strength. Nothing budged. Pete's eyes widened to the size of tennis balls. He glanced around feverishly, limbs were flying everywhere, people were looking out for themselves. No one noticed Pete was in trouble.

Jimmy rested his head onto the steering wheel. He puffed out his cheeks like a chipmunk, trying to keep the monster within calm. A sudden gurgling noise from his stomach alerted him. Time was running out.

"Guys hurry up! I can't hold on!"

Pete pull at the black strap that held him in. "No! Someone help me!"

Clark was about to leave the vehicle, but stopped at Pete's words. He turned back towards his desperate friend. "Pete…Hang on!"

"IT'S COMING!" Jimmy hollered to the heavens.

Pete's eyes locked with Clark's. Clark bit his lip, glancing at Jimmy, tapping his fingers on the hood of the van, thinking…

"On second thought…"

"Don't you dare." Pete warned. "Don't you even go there! Don't leave me!"

Clark shrugged. "Sorry."

"NO! TRATOR!!!!!"

With that the van's door closed. Encasing Pete with his fate…

Outside, they all waited for the inevitable. A trumpeting noise snapped them to attention.

"Oh God, That poor animal…" Lana said.

Kara rolled her eyes. "Lang, that's no animal dieing... Jimmy farted."

Lois winced. "You know, I wouldn't say that just yet…"

"Whoa, It just keeps going! That's kind of amazing." Clark said in awe.

Lana wrinkled her nose. "That's kind of gross."

Lois smiled. "That's the human body Lana."

Chloe closed her eyes and groaned. "It's going to take forever to air that out!"

Kara laughed at the pure horror in Chloe's voice.

A piercing silence stopped any further comments. None of them moved a muscle. A tumble weed moved behind the group, who watched the van with horrified interest.

Suddenly Pete screamed out as the smell hit his senses from inside. They all winced at the sound.

Lois nodded, eyes never coming off of the van. "And there is your dead animal Lana."

(Three hours and 56 minutes into road trip)

Windows were opened as the musty yellow van went across the road. Jimmy, after releasing the monster, slept contently in the front passenger seat as Chloe now drove in his place.

Pete however was not content. After throwing up on the side of the road when the others had released him, he no longer was the happy camper that he had been at the start of the trip. He sometimes would glare back at Clark, who looked sheepishly back.

Lois watched the two look at each other for the seventh time and silently laughed. Smallville was in the shit now, and he knew it.

"Hey Sullivan…Where're we actually going?" Kara spoke up, looking at everyone. "Am I the only one who doesn't know and just came because my cousin told me to?"

Everyone looked thoughtful for moment, before answering Kara's question.

"I thought we were going to…"

"Indiana"

"Michigan"

"Utah"

"New York"

"California"

"…Australia"

All eyes whipped over to Lana. Lois blinked, not quite believing what she heard. "Um…did you just…" She glanced at Clark who was shaking his head sadly amused.

"She was never that great Geography."

Lois nodded "Ah. Of course."

Chloe watched the car's occupants in the rear view mirror. "We're going to where ever the road takes us my friends!…Ooooh McDonald's, Who's hungry?"

Kara leaned forward horrified. "You don't know where we're going…Do you?" Her voice went up an octave.

Chloe smiled. "Not a clue."

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

(At McDonalds)

The seven friends sat at three spread out tables. Kara was busy trying to convince Clark to let her fly home or at least call the police.

"This is kidnapping Kal, kidnapping!"

Lana was arguing quietly with Jimmy and Chloe about the state of the bathrooms.

"I didn't think the sink was supposed to be that low.

"Yeah…"

"Did you two go into the ladies, or the men's?"

(Pause)

"…Oh god!"

"I wondered why that woman looked hairy."

Lois and Pete were still waiting to be served. Pete pulled out his wallet, still giving Clark angry glances.

Lois smirked "You know, if you look at him long enough, he may all of a sudden combust into thin air." She snapped her fingers. "Just like that."

"He broke the bro code." Pete explained. "That's why I'm a little peeved off. He left me to die!" He bowed his head.

Lois looked uncomfortable to say the least. Here was a guy she kind of knew and he was bowing his head complaining about a bro code…In the middle of a line full of other people. "Okay…Let's not get over board now." She tapped his shoulder, hopefully comforting.

Pete looked up at her, like he'd never seen her before. He pointed at her "You. You can help me." He grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her out the line.

"Hey I was being served!"

"That doesn't matter. Lois Lane, you have just been chosen."

Lois sighed, why was it always her? "For what?"

"I'm going to get Clark back. Do you know the word: Prank?"

Lois cocked an eye brow, a smirk creeping onto her face. "You've got my attention Mr Ross. By all means continue…"

Yes, Smallville was in the shit now…And he had no idea what was coming.