Summary: Both Severus and Remus have been imprisoned and will not be released unless someone is willing to be bound to them. Hermione is forced to confront her feelings and history with both men as she debates what is easy verses what is right in love and life

Author's Notes: This story was written for sweetmelodykiss as part of phoenixfest on Insane Journal. The version that will appear here is a "fade to black" adaptation of an NC-17 version. If you are interested in reading all the naughty bits, you will find this story at the Quidditch Pitch, The Petulant Poetess, and Adult Fanfiction.

Disclaimer: The characters, unfortunately, belong to JK Rowling, not me. I just like to bend them to my will.

Equilibrium

By Apythia

Chapter 1

Harry Potter threw down the Daily Prophet in disgust, raking his fingers through his unkempt hair, curses flying out of his mouth fast enough to top even his best flying record.

"You kiss Ginny with that mouth?"

Freezing mid-rant, Harry pivoted slowly to see Remus Lupin, looking haggard despite the lopsided grin trying to brighten his face, leaning against the doorway.

"You're dead!"

"So people keep telling me," he said, pushing off the wall and stumbling slightly.

Harry was immediately at his side, guiding him to a comfortable chair in front of the fire.

"Do you need medical help? Do you want to go to St. Mungo's? Can I get you a drink? Something to eat?"

"Harry," Remus interrupted, "I'm fine. Well, as fine as one can be expected after nearly dying, transforming in my grave and then digging myself out. Thank god no one was around. When I think what could have happened if anyone had been in the cemetery that night." He shuddered.

"You… you … what? How?"

"Bellatrix is a particularly nasty bitch. After… after she killed Tonks" — he averted his eyes to the fire — "she hit me with a stunning curse and then forced the Draught of Living Death down my throat. I think she intended for me to be buried alive, which I was. What she didn't count on was the full moon and a werewolf's sense of self preservation.

"When I transformed without the aid of Wolfsbane, the pain was so intense that it I was finally able to regain my senses and crawl out of my grave."

Harry looked at Remus with complete horror etched on his face. He could not contemplate what it must have been like to crawl out of one's own grave. "But you were there with me when I went to face Voldemort," Harry pointed out.

"I had given up," Remus confessed. "My spirit had surrender, and my body was sure to follow. But then I saw Severus Snape. He was ghosting in the afterlife, or where ever we were, cursing much like you had just been. He had taken precautions against Nagani, and it looked like they had failed."

"But he's alive," Harry interrupted.

"I know," Remus assured him. "Just before he was jerked out of the realm, he told me not to be a fool and that I should go back and 'try living for once now that blight on our existence had been removed.' I thought of Severus, of Teddy, of you, and I knew he was right. It was cowardly to take death, the easy way out, when I had a son and a chance to finally live a life without the constant threat of Voldemort or war like the Sword of Damocles waiting for the last thread to unravel. So I came back."

"But that was over a year ago!" Harry protested. "Where have you been? What have you been doing?"

"Even though I decided to come back, I wasn't ready to face anyone yet," Remus said. "I was in horrible physical shape and my mental condition wasn't much better. I needed time before I could face the Wizarding World again and before I could try to be any sort of father to Teddy."

"Have you seen him yet?" Harry asked, glancing to a picture of his godson on the mantel.

Remus's eyes trailed Harry's, wincing at the image of his son.

"No," he said bitterly. "Andromeda Tonks' werewolf prejudices are even more pronounced since that was what allowed me to live while her daughter remained dead."

"I'll talk to her, Remus. You're Teddy's father; you have a right to have your son with you."

"Thanks, Harry, but this is something I need to do myself," Remus said with a sigh.

"Don't get me wrong; I am ecstatic that you are alive and relatively well and here, but what brings you back now, if not Teddy?"

"I believe it is the same issue that had you swearing so creatively when I arrived."

"Snape?"

"The one and the same."

"I can't believe they still convicted him after the testimony Hermione and I gave!" Harry ranted. "Dumbledore's portrait even confirmed Snape actions were the result of an order he gave. Snape is a war hero and deserves to be free to live his life! It's amazing he actually lived through the war and to be sent to Azkaban …" Harry growled in frustration.

"The Ministry did leave a loophole," Remus reminded him.

"And do you know of anyone who would willingly bind himself to him for life?"

"Harry, you were just defending him rather violently!"

"Well, yes, but being a hero doesn't change the fact he's a snarky git. Can you imagine spending the rest of your life tied to him?"

"Yes," Remus whispered under his breath. "I can."

"Harry!" Hermione squeaked in surprise when her best friend suddenly Apparated in the middle of her kitchen, causing her to drop her teacup. "How many times have I told you not to do that?"

"I'm sorry, Hermione, but I really need to talk to you," Harry pleaded, casting a quick Reparo to the shattered china before handing the cup back to her.

"What is it?"

"Maybe we should sit down." Harry gestured to the table.

"Okay," Hermione said slowly. It had been awhile since she had seen Harry so visibly upset. She wasn't sure she wanted to hear whatever he was about to say.

Adjusting to life post-Voldemort and the loss of so many people she loved had not been easy for her. The war had strained her relationship with her parents to the point she wasn't sure if they would ever forgive her for tampering with their memories, no matter how pure her intentions were.

And then there was Ron. While Hermione loved him terribly, she couldn't imagine spending the rest of her life with him. She could never be like Molly; marrying young and raising a Quidditch team was never her idea of a Happily Ever After. Ron deserved to be with someone whose future goals matched his own, not someone who was hanging on to a relationship just because it was the one thing left unblemished by war. She couldn't make him happy. And she wasn't happy with him.

So she made a decision. She ran. She said her goodbye to Ron in the garden at the Burrow and then Apparated directly to a dinky little cottage in the outskirts of Paris where she could heal her broken heart, along with her war wounds, in private, giving Ron a clean break, a chance to move on.

It worked for Ron, who was once again dating Lavender Brown, and if George was to be believed, the two would soon be engaged.

For Hermione, life had taken an unexpected turn nearly eight months ago when she literally ran into a supposedly dead man in a bookstore. It was the second dead man she had seen since the war ended.

"Snape was convicted yesterday," Harry said, interrupting Hermione's reverie.

"What?" she asked, appalled.

"He's been sentenced to Azkaban for life unless someone agrees to be bound to him and accept full responsibility for his actions."

Hermoine's cursing was nearly as impressive as Harry's had been. "Those bloody idiots at the Ministry! They deserve to be trapped in the Forbidden Forest with irate centaurs!"

"It gets worse."

"How so?"

"Remus is alive."

"Why do you think that?" she asked guardedly.

"Because he came by my house yesterday before going to the Ministry."

"Where is he, Harry? Is he alright?"

"He's been arrested."

"What?" Hermione shrieked.

"The Minister is holding him on trumped up charges of werewolf activity during the war."

"He was a spy! He didn't commit any crimes even when he was with the pack!" Hermione was near hysterics.

"I know, Hermione," Harry said consolingly before his temper took over. "I swear the Minister is trying to eliminate all the Order members he can, especially the ones working closely with Dumbledore like Snape and Remus. Hell, they called an emergency meeting of the Wizengamot just to try Remus immediately. Said his being a werewolf was too great a threat to wait any longer."

Hermione let Harry continue his rant as her mind raced to find a solution to a problem she didn't fully understand. Remus and Severus were both in Azkaban. Two people who devoted their lives, literally, to saving the wizarding world were being repaid with punishment that probably had both of them wishing they had remained dead.

Hermione merely nodded when Harry asked to use her Floo, too caught up in her own thoughts to really pay attention to him. There was no choice. She would have to return to England. This time, she wouldn't be able to just quickly Floo in and out of the Ministry; she'd have to face more than just the interior of the Wizengamot courtroom.

"He's been convicted," Harry said gloomily, throwing himself down onto a chair. "Same sentence as Snape: Find someone to willing to bind with him or it's life in Azkaban."

Hermione was quiet, her mind trying to reason out how this had happened.

"Harry," she whispered. "How did Remus end up getting arrested?"

"He went to the Ministry to save Snape," Harry said, making a face.

"How was he planning to do that?"

"I'm not sure," Harry confessed. "It's not like he was going to offer to bind himself to Snape or anything, though, right?"

Hermione was suddenly not so sure.