I Love You
I can tell its you from a mile away, and I can tell you are tired and hurting. Your shoulders are hunched just a little bit more than usual, the tension is obvious, even from this distance, and I want to reach out to you and make the tension run away. My mouth automatically breaks into a smile as you get closer, a smile which is mirrored on your face, although yours is a tired smile.
I have a smile
Stretched from ear to ear
To see you walking down the road.
I don't know what made me leave the house and come and meet you. But I don't know a lot at the moment, like I don't know how this happened again, how the world shifted under my feet and you have worked your way back into my life and back under my skin. Your hand gently brushes my cheek and your eyes meet mine. I take your hand and guide you to into the house, wanting to get you to forget everything about the day.
We meet at the lights
I stare for a while
The world around disappears.
It's always this way, we come together after long days, hoping that the other will wash away the pain. We always do, if only for a while. But every time you come it me it gets harder to let you go, harder to let you walk out of the door, but my mind goes blank and I forget that I want to tell you I love you.
Just you and me
On this island of hope
A breath between us could be miles.
"Come here." I pull you to me, place my hands on your face and kiss you, trying desperately to erase years of pretending that have hurt you, trying to erase the long day, week, month, that have made us both tense and strung out. You respond like you always do, with a quiet moan and I know that if only for tonight I will be your safe harbour.
Let me surround you
My sea to your shore
Let me be the calm you seek.
I touch my lips to your neck, loving the feel of you alive underneath me. You whisper my name and clutch at my shoulders and we both shudder in release, and I hope that maybe this time you will stay. You fall asleep in my arms, your hand splayed over my heart, legs entangled with mine. I run my hand up your arm, feeling your skin beneath my fingertips and I resist the urge to wake you to tell you all the things I want to say, but I know that I won't be able to say them to your face.
Oh and every time I'm close to you
There's too much I can't say
And you just walk away.
"Thank you." You say, your hand on my face, one last lingering smile before you walk out of the door. Even though I know you will be back, or I will go to you soon, I can't help hating the sight of you walking away.
And I forgot
To tell you
I love you
And the night's
Too long
And cold here
Without you
I grieve in my condition
For I cannot find the strength to say I need you so.
It is a full month before either of us needs again, and you once again are at mine, turning up with tired eyes and bourbon. The month has been full of glances that linger too long, standing just that little bit too close, cases that affect both of us, raised voices and vibrating need that wont go away. You lift your tired eyes to mine and I not only see tiredness but more pain and guilt than usual. I take you, where you stand, passion and hunger, scratching away at the shells that we both have grown and as we fall over the edge I whisper what I have wanted to for so many years.
"I love you." Your eyes tell me you have heard but you file it away as a moment in time, words spoken in release cannot be held as truth.
Oh and every time I'm close to you
There's too much I can't say
And you just walk away.
This time, this time it won't happen, I wont let you walk out that door without saying what I need to.
"I never want you to leave again." I say as my hand encircles your wrist and pulls you back through the door, back to me.
"Ok." You say, your green eyes shining and your hair curls over your shoulder, I brush it behind your ear. I love the fact that you didn't even hesitate.
And I forgot
To tell you
I love you
And the night's
Too long
And cold here
Without you
Hope this is a little bit happier for you Aly!
V!
xox