Chapter 3
Clark was dreaming; he was having a nightmare… Lois knew who he really was. He was dreaming that somehow she had figured out his secret, seen through his disguise and realized that Clark Kent was that same alien that wore the blue, red and yellow suit. One and the same. In his mind the dream was a little blurry, but Lois knew for sure.
He woke up with a start again. The door unlocked, and it startled him out of his dream. Quickly he turned his head around and focused his eyes to see through the door.
It was Lois. At least his x-ray vision was intact.
The first thing he did was move his hand to his face as fast as he could. The glasses were not there. He sat up, the pain on his back was still pounding, but the adrenaline shot overrode it. Still, he looked around and couldn't find them. The door opened wide as he finally saw his glasses on the carpet below him. He reached for them, stretching more than he should, the wound burning. But he didn't care, protecting his identity was priority one.
Lois walked in the room, carrying a big brown bag with her. She silently walked to the small table by the window where she placed the bag. Turning to look at him finally, she frowned.
"Clark, you don't need your glasses anymore with me." She stated.
"What?" He didn't seem to understand.
"I know you're Superman." She said.
Clark lowered his eyes and didn't know how to respond to that. "It wasn't a dream?" He said almost to himself.
"No, it wasn't. I already know your big secret. Get over it."
He turned to look at her again, hopeful. "Then, you're not mad?"
She smiled. "I wouldn't say that. First we have to get you better, then you'll have to answer some of my questions." She turned around to take the supplies out of the bag. "And believe me, you may not like what those questions are, so be ready with really good answers."
Clark nodded, suddenly afraid of what was to come. The smell of the chicken soup suddenly filled the room and Clark felt his stomach churn.
"Here." Lois gave him the cup filled with hot soup along with a spoon. "Be careful, it's really hot."
"Thank you." Clark sat up slowly and took the cup. He began eating, not caring how hot it was.
"Wait, Clark! It's h…" But then her brain started working. "Oh, right… you can't really feel that, can you?"
Clark simply ignored the comment as he kept eating, realizing how hungry he was. In a matter of seconds the soup was gone. "I guess you really were hungry." Lois said, "I brought some Chinese food and pastries, I didn't know what you wanted, it's barely noon, so I wasn't sure what was appropriate."
"The soup was great. I guess I really needed to eat." He said, not really having listened to what she'd said.
"Then, you're feeling better?"
Clark nodded. "Yes, thank you."
Lois seemed glad. She walked to the small table and dragged the wooden chair next to the bed. Sitting up in front of Clark, she felt him tense up.
"I talked to Richard." She began.
"You did?"
"Yes." She continued. "It's still cloudy outside and I figured he could fly you up in his sea plane. Above the clouds, I mean." Clark listened intently. "He says the plane probably won't fly that high, but he can try."
After a while, Clark asked her a very important question. "And, who does he think he's taking?"
"Superman."
"All right." Clark said, wanting to ask the next question but being a little afraid of doing so. "And you told him who… I am?"
She smirked. "Of course not, silly. Why would I do that? After all, if you kept the secret from me, the mother of your child…" there was a little sarcasm in her voice, "…I thought you wouldn't want anybody else to know."
He stared at her, taken aback. It was beginning, the aftermath of the revelation. "Thank you. I – I don't think I want him… to know."
"You're welcome."
They sat there in silence, Lois looking intently at him, Clark looking anywhere else except into Lois' eyes.
"Would you have told me?" Lois asked him suddenly, Clark's head jerked to meet hers. "If I hadn't figured it out, would you have told me who you were?"
Clark felt it would be useless to hide the truth. "I don't know."
"Why?" Lois demanded, "Why not? Don't you trust me? You slept with me and Jason is the proof of that and you still don't know if you would have told me?"
"I didn't know Jason was my son." He wanted to smile, it was the second time he had said the word. Son. It felt good.
"Well, now that you know, would you have told me?" Lois insisted.
"I don't know, Lois. It all happened so fast. I came back and you were with Richard and you were going to marry him. Are going to marry him…You had a child. I thought Jason was Richard's. Why would I think he wasn't? And yesterday when you told me, it took me a while to understand."
"What's so hard to understand?"
"I didn't think I… I didn't think we could have a baby. After all, we are… well, we're different species."
"Well, we did create Jason, make no mistake." She snapped.
He closed his eyes, wanting to remain calm. Lois was making it difficult. "Lois, I'm an alien. How am I supposed to know what to expect?"
"I don't know. If you would have stayed, probably you could have known."
"Probably, but…"
"And if you had said good-bye, then probably, I would have told you."
Clark stopped, eyes wide, "You knew then?"
"Yes, I did… but I wasn't sure what to do, and after I figured it out… you left."
He felt the weight fall on him again. "Sorry."
"Sorry? Yeah, I'm sorry too."
"But, I had to go, Lois." He explained. "It's not easy being me. I…"
"You what? You are Superman! You can do all these amazing things, what's not easy about that?"
"Many things." Clark protested.
"Like what?"
Clark stared at her, suddenly feeling more an alien than ever before. He had always felt uncomfortable talking about his powers. Sometimes he even felt that with all the things he could do, he didn't deserve anything else that was good. "You may not understand, but it makes me feel alone, isolated. I can't really talk to anybody without freaking them out. I have to be careful not to hurt anyone. And I need to do this every day of my life."
"We all have our problems. You have yours. But we all live our lives here and we're all fine. We don't go hiding our identity and lying to people." Which was actually not true at all. All people hid who they really where and lied all the time… but still…
He stared at her, hurt by her words. "Then forget it. Even if you don't want to understand, that's why I had to go. I wanted to feel… normal. At least once in my life, I wanted to belong someplace, be ordinary, not having to be… well, Superman."
"And that's why you went back to Krypton? Then, you weren't planning on coming back?"
He saw her eyes water, that realization had probably been worse than the fact he hadn't said good-bye. Should he tell her he wasn't sure? That would probably make matters worse. "I don't know, Lois."
"You don't know?" A tear left her eye.
"I don't… I – I don't have all the answers, Lois. I don't know everything. But I was confused and didn't have anybody to go to."
"You had me! I thought you loved me!" She snapped.
"And I do, I love you." He said, very softly. "But in this case, you couldn't be there for me because I chose not to let you, okay? I felt I had to do it on my own. I'm sorry. I may have made a mistake."
Lois nodded, cleaned her cheek from the tears for a long time. "Well, you're back, and I'm glad." It looked she was trying to calm down.
"I'm glad to be back." Clark said, smiling. "I really wanted to see you again." She just looked at him. "When I came back, I didn't want Superman to come back with me."
"What? Why not?"
"I just didn't feel like that guy anymore." He looked at the window. "I don't know. It seemed that nobody really needed me, so I began to think that maybe it was time for me to live my life." He turned back to her. "The first thing I did when coming back to work, was ask for you. You weren't there, you were in the space shuttle, but I remember looking at you in the television screen and knowing that you were the reason I was here."
"Clark, I…"
But he stopped her. "I had to become Superman again to save you. I just couldn't live without you. It would all be very pointless now… without you." A laugh escaped him, "And then I found out you were engaged… or actually, I think I found out before the shuttle rescue. Jimmy told me." Lois just sat there, listening to Superman just letting his heart out on her. He continued, "And you had a son. Everything seemed to be going just fine for you and you didn't seem to need Superman… or Clark." He didn't stop. "I just had to make sure you didn't love me anymore. I just had to know. I knew you were angry… probably still are, but in a way I knew I couldn't just let you go without a fight. You once loved me… or at least, part of me. Besides…" He said in a lower voice… "You are not married… yet."
"Clark… you left me alone, what was I supposed to do? You not only took Superman away from me, but you also took Clark, my friend, away with you. Suddenly I didn't have anyone. When Richard came, he…"
"I know, he gave you what I never gave you…" He interrupted her.
"He was a father to Jason, which was the most important thing." Clark nodded. "He gave me stability and a life. Things I never had before."
"I know. He's a great man. I don't know much about him, but what I've seen… I know he's right for you." He saw her face change into confusion; she frowned, not knowing what to think of his last words.
Finally, she laughed. "If he's so right for me, then why haven't I married him?"
"I don't know. But, if you love him, Jason loves him… then…" Clark said; sadness in his voice.
"And what about you? You'll just step back and watch?"
"Lois, I left for over five years. What right do I have to claim you? I love you and I have been in love with you since… probably since I met you at Perry's office on my first day at the Planet. But I just can't come back and destroy your life. It wouldn't be fair."
She nodded, understanding his position. "And Jason?"
The mention of the boy's name brought a smile to his face, she smiled with him. "He's my son. You don't know how happy that makes me. But I think that because he's my son his life won't be easy. Believe me, I know."
"He is strong."
Clark didn't understand. "How do you mean? How strong?"
"Strong enough to send a piano flying through a room?"
"Oh. I didn't know that. When did this happen?"
"On Luthor's boat."
Luthor. Just hearing his name made him angry. "Did he do something to him? To you?"
"Not really. I mean, except locking us up in the pantry to drown."
"That bastard." Clark said, again so out of character.
"He wasn't very nice to you, either." Lois said, "The kryptonite shard I took out of your back was pretty big."
"It still hurts." He complained. "I wish it would heal already."
Lois suddenly stood up. "I forgot. I brought some bandages." She rose to the table, where she took a first aid kit from the brown bag. "Still not hungry for Chinese?"
"Maybe later. Thanks."
Lois walked to him and placed the kit on the chair she'd been sitting on. "You'll need to take your shirt off, probably."
He nodded, beginning to unbutton his shirt. Slowly, making faces, he managed to take it off, revealing his well built body to Lois. He heard her sigh and stare at him, but he knew she'd seen him like this before.
"Turn around." She ordered and he obeyed. He felt her small hand on his back and then waited for her to take care of him. She cleaned the wound first, "I think it's infected. You should look at it." He arched in pain as she cleaned the wound. "Stop moving!"
"It hurts." He complained.
"Come on, you're Superman, you can take this."
He smiled. "Well, I'm not used to this sort of pain, okay? Usually nothing ever hurts… ever."
"You're so spoiled." She mused.
"Right." Clark replied; glad to be talking to her so freely. It was something he missed. "Ouch!" He said again, as Lois continued cleaning his wound.
"You have green and white puss. Is this normal?" She asked him.
"I have no idea. Usually when I get hurt by kryptonite I heal in a few minutes."
"Do you think there's still kryptonite inside you?"
"I don't think so, I feel weak, but not sick like when I feel with kryptonite." He explained.
She finished cleaning up the wound and continued to put gauze and bandaged his back. "That feel better?"
"Yes. Thank you." Clark said, smiling at her. "It may be a good idea to get some sun right about now."
"Do you feel well enough to… you know… fly?" She asked him, curious.
"I don't know. I can try." Right there, still sitting on the bed, he started to rise up. Slowly. Lois had to back up in astonishment, she had never before seen him fly without his suit on. Slowly, she watched him straighten up and levitate away from the bed. He was now in a standing position, his chest still naked. Finally, he went back down, his feet touching the dirty carpet.
"What happened? How'd that feel?" She asked him.
But he shook his head. "I don't know. I'm just so tired. I don't think I have the stamina to keep it up for long." He smiled. "Actually, I want to sit down again."
He did, Lois looked worriedly at him. "Why don't you let me take you to the hospital?"
"No. I'll go with Richard. He can fly me to the sun. That's what you said, wasn't it?"
"Yeah, he'll pick up Jason at three o'clock and we'll meet at the house." Lois explained.
Clark turned to look at the clock. "It's almost one o'clock now." Then he looked back at Lois, wondering. "Would you mind if I call my mom? I know she must be worried. After all, she must have known I fell and was taken to the hospital."
Yes! That had been Martha Kent outside the hospital, Lois thought, she knew she had recognized the woman from somewhere. "I saw her at the hospital."
"You did?"
"Yes. She was waiting with the crowd." A thought then occurred to her. "It must have been hard not being able to go in and see you. But then again, who would believe she was Superman's mother?"
"I know, it's been hard for her ever since my dad died and I left." He explained. "But she has a boyfriend now." He said, making a face again, Lois couldn't help but smile.
"And you don't like her boyfriend?" She asked him.
"Who cares what I like? It's the man she chose. I mean, it's not dad… but she needs company, right?"
Lois nodded; talking with this man was like talking to any ordinary man. He was right, after all, he was really Clark Kent. A man that just so happened to have super powers. Without knowing, she was beginning to fall in love with him all over again.
"Well, I gotta go back to work and you should rest." She said.
"But, Perry said…" Clark began, starting to get up.
"Forget Perry. I will cover for you. I'll be back in two hours. I'll just go to the hospital to find out what has gotten out about your disappearance." She took her purse and walked to the door. "In any case, if something happens, I'll just tell Perry I have an exclusive with Superman." She winked at him. "Right?"
He offered half a smile. "Right." How strange it had felt to say that.
"Well, you just rest and I'll come pick you up in about two hours. Deal?" Clark nodded, "If you get hungry, there's the Chinese food I brought. I hope it's not too cold now."
"Don't worry about that... I can… heat it up." He said, almost blushing.
"Oh, right. I'm still having a little trouble realizing that you have the same powers as…" She rolled her eyes… "Oh, never mind."
He smiled as Lois exited the room.
To be continued…