Chapter Seven: The Hidden Issues
Looking down, a young brunette woman sat alone on the edge of the extremely soft king sized bed, in the place in which she temporarily inhabited. Her petite hand ran gently and slowly across something in her lap, as she studied the object in front of her. It was a simple entity from the outside, one that someone passing by might not think to look at. But the girl knew that it contained something authentic and important within its barriers, something she wasn't sure she was prepared to see. She couldn't believe that she had had this much restraint thus far. She was dying to unfold what was before her, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. If she did, could she ever be trusted again? She wasn't absolutely sure that she could justify her actions, even if they did seem legit to her. And so instead of opening it, she continued to sit still and stare, her brain never ceasing to churn over the possibilities.
"So after we have lunch with my mother, I think that she and I are going to go shopping down town." Marissa started to explain her day's events to her boyfriend.
"Sounds like a plan, it's been awhile since you and your mother have had bonding time." Bray nodded as they continued.
"That's because SOMEONE hogs all of my existence." Marissa grinned and leaned in to kiss him on the cheek, so that he knew that she was just kidding. She would much rather spend time with Bray than her mother any day. But truth was, ever since she had woken up from the coma, she actually spent the majority of the time with just one person, herself. She was a far off resemblance from the Social Chair she once was. "But if you want, you can meet us again for dinner."
"Sounds like a plan."
The couple was walking hand and hand down the ancient stone streets in Rome. It was a vivid sun filled day, with not a cloud in the sky. It was also extremely warm. Due to no clouds, the sun's rays had nothing to filter through, and they were blatantly beating down on Marissa's bare back. She wore a simple styled halter top, one that crisscrossed in the front and tied around the back. The designer shirt left her back completely exposed and the front fitting snuggly to show off her small rounded breasts. Showing off all different shades of greens, it was accompanied with a short white skirt and matching keds flats. Bray was clad in a fitting pair of Burberry jeans that were rolled up at the ankle. On top he sported a baby blue button up, with again the sleeves rolled up. They looked classy, and certainly were a head turning couple, especially among the sea of black dressed Italians.
They had just spent some time in the Vatican City, where they took a trip up to the top of the Vatican Dome to look out over the city of Rome. It was one of the most breathtaking views Marissa had ever remembered seeing. Not to mention very romantic. This is how they had been spending their time all summer long. Bray had urged Marissa to actually explore the city she had lived in for three years. This of course was in hopes to help her take the focus off of her elapsed past and progress with the future; hopefully a future with him. He only had one year left of university in Italy, and then he was planning on returning to England; and if she agreed, he wanted to bring her with him. But these were plans only conversed in his head; he wasn't going to spring it upon her yet. He knew how she got when they spoke of her past, or even their future. She had a problematical time making plans without knowing her past for some reason. And so Bray believed that it was better for their relationship to live in the present. And so as she did, he pretended to follow along without pressuring her too much. But he was definitely working on her, and with his request she had agreed to finally explore Rome and other small villages in Italy. By doing so, the two of them were enjoying their summer holiday by doing many touristy things that Marissa had ceased to do since she had lived there. However Bray's plan in helping her let go of the past was still unapparent if it had begun to work or not.
Finally, after a little bit more flirting and strolling along the side walk she stopped as they reached the outside of the restaurant they had become so familiar with. "Well this is my stop." Marissa spoke as she turned to face Bray with a crafty smile.
Bray smirked slightly and looked her up and down. "What is that smile for love?"
Marissa shrugged her shoulders and leaned into him. The sun was so bright she had to squint her baby blues into slits. "Nothing, I just had a really good time today." She leaned in and wrapped her arms around his torso tightly.
Bray took in a deep breath, as he breathed in her scent. He wrapped his arms around her lower back and held her so close, that it raised her a bit off the ground. He was crazy about this girl. It was odd because he wasn't sure he would be once Julie explained to him the situation and all the drama. But he had grown to truly care about her, and now he was afraid of losing her. "Are you actually going to try to get along with your mother today?" He asked as he tilted his head back to look at her tanned face.
Marissa loved it when he held her like that. It didn't make her problems and issues go away, but it sure did make them feel better. "That depends." She spoke as she finally took a step back with a shrug. "I can't promise anything if she annoys me." She stated flatly and without regret.
Bray just shook his and laughed lightly. He would be the first one to admit that Julie Cooper could sometimes be a handful. But at the same time, he didn't quite understand the resentment that Marissa held for her. Especially when it was obvious to him that she loved her. "You need to go easy on her Marissa, you know she loves you."
It was Marissa's turn to roll her eyes. She backed away from him with irritation. "Bray, don't tell me how to deal with my mother." She didn't even know why, but this frustrated her beyond anything. If it wasn't Julie telling her how to act and what to do, it was Bray. She looked and met his big brown eyes. He returned her gaze with sadness. He hadn't met to upset her.
But before Bray could open his mouth to apologize or even to defend himself, Marissa interrupted. "I'm gonna go, I'll talk to you later." And with that Bray leaned forward to kiss her again, but Marissa turned her face so that his lips pressed on her cheek, and she turned to enter the restaurant.
Bray was left there to gawk at her as she walked away. He was confused. What had he said to make her suddenly turn so cold to him? He watched until her thin frame disappeared into the restaurant. And then he allowed himself to blink and look away.
In the mean time, as Marissa made her exit, and was growing more irritated. She hadn't met to take out her frustration on Bray, but lately it seemed to always be happening. She snapped at him, when he tried to help her out. But she knew that he was trying to get her to forget about her past. And that killed her. Didn't he realize how important it was to her? No, he obviously didn't understand. She didn't have a choice in the matter. She HAD forgotten her past. And it slaughtered her within. She didn't feel complete or authentic. And between him and her mother, she felt like she didn't even have control over the present. Maybe that was another reason why she couldn't sleep with him. There were other reasons, the fact that she didn't feel like she could give herself to anyone, when she didn't know what she was giving. Including the idea that every other guy she had slept with, Luke & Koby, had cheated on her. But lastly because this was the ONE last thing that she had control over. Her body.
Trying desperately to forget her aggravation, a moody Marissa moved into the restaurant just in time to see her mother making out with Joseppi. She immediately covered her eyes and groaned. "Ugggh, you guys are too old for that." She didn't hesitate to say her opinions, and slipped into the chair in the empty table where she and her mother always sat.
Julie immediately jumped back, with a sheepish grin played across her face. It didn't seem to bother her that her daughter had just caught her making out with him. It made her feel young and lively. Besides, he had come along way from the man he once was when she first met him. Although he didn't lack for imagination between the sheets and in the confines of their room, getting him to kiss her in his restaurant was something else. "Oh Marissa, stop being such a prude, you're just jealous Bray isn't here for you to make out with."
However, as soon as Joseppi saw Marissa he blushed slightly. He had never dated anyone with a daughter before, let alone one as grown as she was. "You're never to old for a little hanky panky." He spoke in his truest Italian accent. Then he moved over and kissed Marissa on the cheek in a fatherly manner and then stepped away. "Ladies, I will leave you be."
As he walked away Marissa laughed. "And the fact that he used the term 'hanky panky' proves my point."
She was now shaking. The same brunette woman was slumped over on the edge of the bed, holding the object tightly in front of her and between her fingers. It was as if she allowed herself to loosen up she would do something she truly regretted. This was absolutely killing her. Did it really matter what was in this small object? Couldn't she come to conclusions on her own? Or even just ask the person it involved directly. She knew it wasn't easy, but if she carefully and deliberately asked the right questions, she surely could do it. But what if she didn't receive the right answers? What if she wasn't trusted with the real information? She knew that this object held the truth. Or at least it contained clues that lead her to the truth. She wouldn't have had it in her possession now if that wasn't the case.
Slowly she sat it down on the bed. She just couldn't do it. As much as she wanted to know, it wasn't right. She stared at it for a brief moment and than shot up off the bed, trying desperately to forget about it.
"Marissa, are you really going to put ALL those carbs into your body?" Julie sat and watched as Marissa took a large bite of spaghetti. It seemed she had finally gotten her appetite back from the other day. Perhaps her frustration made her hungrier. Julie's eyes grew wide, wondering just how her daughter ate what she ate, and still kept her lean figure. She had to admit, she was pretty jealous.
Marissa chewed and swallowed her bite before taking a drink of the wine in front of her and washing it down. "Would you make up your mind Mom? First you yell at me for not having an appetite, and now you are complaining about me eating too much." She shook her head and leaned back in her chair, wiping her mouth on a cloth napkin and putting it back into her lap. "Besides, we're in Italy, when are you going to finally embrace the culture?"
Julie looked down to her salad that contained spinach, other greens and cold shrimp. She then smiled and looked back up to her daughter. "Oh honey, I embrace it just fine." Julie's gazed turned towards the kitchen and then moved back to her grown daughter. Her lips turned into a devious smirk and she took a bite of own lunch.
Marissa made a face when she realized what Julie was talking about and spoke with disgust, "Ewww." She laughed and then suddenly stopped. Where did that word come from? She looked up to the red haired woman across from her with wide eyes, but Julie hadn't seemed to flinch. Marissa hadn't seen Summer in years, and hadn't been friends with her for even longer, so this surprised her when she used the word in the way that her long time best friend had. She had sounded just like her.
Julie decided to change the subject, and began jabbering aimlessly away about something selfish, and Marissa's mind began to wander….
It was a typical Newport party; consisting of the most popular kids finding yet another reason to get together and revel it up while getting wasted and using their bodies to grind against one another like the true horny teenagers that they were. Although it was years and years go, Marissa remembered it like it was yesterday. Perhaps it was because she lost so much of her memory. But the stuff she did remember seemed so clear. Girls were clad in nothing more than string bikinis and maybe a small cover up here or there. The beach house was decorated with sporadic white Christmas lights hanging on the walls, but it was the crowd that truly bejeweled it. It was a scene straight out a richer and younger version of the playboy mansion. Although the clothes were practically non existent, they were at the very least designer. But Marissa stood out. Instead of wearing her beach clothes she had on her favorite pair of low rise boot cut jeans. They hugged her hips and bottom perfectly. Just enough to show off her small curves. Her tank top was a red and grey horizontally striped. It was form fitting and short enough to show just a sliver of her mid drift. Although she was covered more than anyone else, she wasn't a prude; the plummeting 'U' shape the cut of the shirt made, was held together only by crisscrossed string over her small breasts. She didn't know it, but she looked perfect.
The party was held at Holly's house just after their yearly fashion show, and Marissa had already spiked her drink with her personal stash of her favorite poison of choice: Vodka. Just when she thought the party was going to be just like any other she saw him. She smiled and moved over to greet the new boy in town.
Ryan who other than Seth was the only one still wearing his suit. He saw her approaching and spoke first. "Hey." It was a simple greeting, but in his eyes it held so much more
"Hey." She responded back. Marissa remembered thinking how different he was. She was intrigued, and wanted to know more.
"So, what do you think of Newport?" She continued the conversation with a smile. She took Ryan's drink from him, helping herself to his supply. Sure she was with Luke, and of course she would never let anything happen beyond simple flirting. But he was different, and she craved the distinction he offered.
His blue eyes met hers, and a smirk fell across his face. "I think I can get in less trouble where I'm from." Before she could open her mouth to respond to his comment, Holly interrupted their conversation from the card table. "Hey Coop, it's your turn to deal."
She knew she couldn't get out of it. She had a reputation to uphold, and friends to please. But she couldn't leave without a closing remark. "You have no idea."
She gave him another smile and turned to leave him, leaving him to watch her go.
In reality Julie was still rambling on and on. But Marissa didn't hear a word. A smile fell upon her face and her memory continued…
Marissa was from afar now. But her eyes were still upon Ryan. The only thing separating them was a pack of nearly identical looking blondes all talking on their cell phones. But Marissa still managed to watch him. There was something about him that drew her to him. It was hard to explain. But she didn't have to. Right now her thoughts were merely in her head. And just as her eyes had found his again, Summer's petite body came between them.
"Look …who I found." A very drunk Summer approached Ryan with more than just words, with a provocative look. As she tried to flaunt her own bikini clad body, she spilled some of her beer upon Ryan. "Ooops, I'm wasted."
Ryan didn't respond verbally. He bent down to brush off the suit, Summer tried to 'help him' by rubbing her hands along his chest. He just looked from her and then around, hoping that Seth or Marissa weren't watching. And Summer continued with playing him, 'hot' by wrapping her hands around his neck. From her spot in the room Marissa eyed her best friend. What was she doing? A ping of jealousy was felt in her gut, yet she tried immediately to dismiss it.
"So, what's your name anyway" Summer asked the blonde beau, her eyes still burning into him.
"Ryan."
A larger smile spread across her face, and she repeated his name in her head as she ran her hands across his firm chest.
As Ryan continued to try to push her away, Marissa continued to watch. She wanted to stop her friend from embarrassing herself. Or was there something more to it. But before she could even interrupt Seth Cohen intervened.
"Ryan, you've got to come…" He stopped as soon as he saw what was going on. "What are you doing?" Seth stared at his new friend with the love of his life not holding back that he was obviously quite upset.
Ryan tried to pull away again, and this time succeeded. "Hey… ummm."
"Excuse me!" Summer tried to ignore the guy she barely recognized. She was insulted and offended that Ryan just brushed her off.
But that didn't stop the conversation between the boys. Seth continued, "What are you doing? I named my boat after her."
And suddenly Summer's attention was caught. "What? Eww, who ARE you?"
And now it was time for Ryan to ignore Summer. He needed to explain what was going on. Marissa was watching it still from a few feet away still unnoticed. Ryan spoke quietly, "It's not what you think. She's just a little bit drunk."
Summer didn't seem to care, she came up behind Ryan and wrapped her arms around his neck once more, this time from behind. "Come on, Ryan."
Seth started to walk away, and Ryan tried to stop him. " Seth, Seth…Seth"
But it was official, Seth was betrayed once again and this time he wouldn't stand for it. He pushed him with all his might, causing Ryan to actually stumble a few steps back falling into something. "You know what, why don't you just go back to Chino? I'm sure there's a really nice car in the parking lot that you could steal."
And that is when Seth disappeared out of the house and down to the beach. Ryan stood there a bit dumb founded. But by then they had caused quite a scene, and Marissa wasn't the only one watching. The awkward silence was only broken by Summer's all too familiar catch phrase.
She laughed and spoke up. "Chino? Ewww."
That was Ryan tried to get away from the stares and whispers. He turned to get out, and nearly bumped right into Marissa. She chose to just look away and Ryan took off after Seth.
The memory was perfectly lucid. She smiled to herself as she remembered that first night and how it was the start of her friendship with the kid from Chino. Ryan had come to Newport and shook things up for her. She couldn't help but reminisce about how she had helped Seth take him to the model home, or how when she and Luke took a break, she almost fell for him. He was different, and she loved it. There were never any judgments from either of them. And Marissa remembered the spark she felt every time he touched her. She still couldn't believe they ended up going to her Katilion together. The look on her mother's face was priceless. She had started to second guess her perfectly planned out life with Luke. And if it wasn't for Ryan, she might not ever doubt it. She knew that deep down she wanted him. She was just scared. Could she really leave the life she had with Luke, the life she had known her entire life? As much as she wanted to, she couldn't help but still be scared. But it didn't matter, nothing happened between them anyway.
She continued to wonder what would have happened if she hadn't messed up in Tijuana. Could she and Ryan have ended up together? She knew things were over with Luke as soon as she found out about him and Holly, but how did she end up with Koby? Was seeing Marissa in the dingy alley way too much for Ryan to handle? She couldn't blame him if it was. She was a mess, and there was no reason to bring him into that life. It was just a shame that Marissa slept with Luke in the first place. Maybe her and Ryan could have been something more than friends and Marissa would have never went through the pain Luke put her through. Maybe then she could have truly let Ryan comfort her when she found out about her parents divorce. He could have been the thing that changed her. They seemed to be on that track even before Marissa broke up with Luke. But what happened? She didn't know, and her mom never seemed to mention him. And whenever she asked, Julie just responded by saying she had no idea because after TJ he wasn't really in the picture. Maybe if her and Summer ever did talk again, she could ask her. It wasn't important, it was her history, her silly youth. And yet she still wanted to know every detail of her lost memory. But it was no use. Her and Summer were no longer friends, and as much as she wanted to try, too much time had passed. She may just never know. Was it time to accept that?
"Marissa, are you even listening to any word I just said?" Julie tapped her manicured finger nails on the table in front of her, waiting to see what her daughter's explanation would be this time. But she saw something on her face, she hadn't seen in a really long time… a real smile. But it wasn't just any smile. It seemed… old.
"Oh sorry." Marissa apologized and then looked up to her mom.
Did she just say she was sorry? Julie thought to herself. She looked to her daughter strangely and waited for more of an explanation. Marissa rarely apologized for her actions.
"So you know what's strange?" Marissa began, and took another bite of her now cool spaghetti. Once she realized it wasn't hot anymore, she pushed it away from her and crossed her arms loosely over her stomach.
"You mean, besides the way that you are acting right now?" Julie's eyes widened and stared one more time at her. "Marissa honey, you haven't been acting like yourself, is everything ok?"
Marissa sighed. Not only because her mom wouldn't just leave her alone. The way she saw it, she had been acting funny for the last three years. But then again, she really wouldn't know now would she? She had no idea what she was supposed to act like. But she was also annoyed that she was interrupted in her thoughts. So she decided to ignore her Mom's statement and continue.
"The other day, I must have been hallucinating…" Marissa laughed at the way her mind played tricks on her. "I walked into my room, and looked out the window."
Julie sat there, quiet, waiting to hear what had gotten Marissa so amused. She crossed her legs, and started tapping her foot up and down.
"And for a moment I could have sworn I saw Summer Roberts staring in through the frame." Marissa laughed and reached out to take another sip of her wine.
Julie's eyes widened and she felt as if her heart had suddenly stopped. Uncomfortably she let out a strange sounding laugh and shook her head in disbelief. "Why on earth would you think that you saw her? First of all your window is like eight feet off the ground. Secondly, there is no reason for her to be here." Nor, no way that she could find us. Right? She thought to herself inside her frantic running mind. The once easy going Julie had suddenly become very paranoid.
Marissa stopped with her story, and started to pick up on her mother's bizarre actions. She laughed and leaned forward to look at her, as if she was studying her more closely? "Are you ok?" She laughed and shook her head. "Of course she couldn't be there, I guess some of my dreams must be transferring into my day dreams. I wonder what Doctor Bryce would say about that one." Marissa shrugged it off. She really did think it was just an illusion her crazy mind had made up. But it was Julie who was now worried.
"I'm sure it is normal to think you are seeing people of your past? Especially when that is all you think about." Julie said sternly, unfolding her crossed legs and sighing. "Marissa, you really need to stop worrying about what your mind has lost. Have you ever thought that just maybe your memories have vanished for a reason? You are going to drive yourself mad if you keep this up."
Marissa looked gravely at her mother. She really didn't understand did she? No matter how hard she tried, Julie Cooper would never get her daughter. And for sake of not getting into it in her mother's boyfriends restaurant, Marissa decided just to agree. "You are right Mom." Her words were cold and flat. She finished off her wine and looked away. "I just thought it was kind of funny. Sometimes I think about her, and what she is up to." She admitted. She knew that her and Summer had had a falling out, but she couldn't help but miss her. Even if she did sleep with Koby.
At a table near by, Marcello was watching the two women eating and interacting with a curious face. He had been spending the night with Summer in her hotel on a regular basis. Really the only time he wasn't with her was when he had to work. Today he had wanted to call in sick, to spend time with her, and crack open that journal he had been trying to convince her to read. But it was no use and Summer hadn't budged. And furthermore she had insisted that he went to work, because he needed to make money to come visit her when she returned to the states. But Marcello couldn't help but think she just wanted to read the journal by herself.
And now he was excited that Summer had pushed him off to his job. He was lucky enough to be the one to wait on Julie and Marissa, and for the first time he truly paid attention to every word they said. Maybe he would be able to find out some things on his own. But to his dismay, the only things he had found out thus far was that they didn't really get along very well, Marissa seemed to be having some trouble with Bray, and Julie… well Julie was just Julie: overly demanding, completely self involved and without a clue as to how to make her daughter happy. It seemed nothing could falter her demeanor either. And just as he was about to give up, and think that they really did lead a boring life, Marcello's ears perked up when he heard Summer's name.
Marcello moved closer to the table, using the excuse to fill their water glasses to get a better sound. He hadn't heard what was said, or why she was talking about her, but he wouldn't miss a word now. He started with Marissa's glass first, flashing her an all too charming smile. And he actually thought that in the midst of glaring at her mother, she offered him one back.
"Well of course you think of her Marissa, she was your best friend for practically your entire life. But please don't forget that she isn't to be trusted, you know what she did to you." Julie was pulling out the big guns here, she couldn't risk Marissa wanting to come in contact with her best friend after all this time. Only trouble could truly come of that.
Marcello's eyes grew wide, and now he was even more anxious to hear more. What could she possibly have done to ruin Marissa's trust? The Summer that he knew would have done anything for her best friend and nothing at all to hurt her. And the way she talked about her, the two of them had an amazing relationship.
"No mother, actually I don't really know what she did to me." Marissa began, with aggravation in her voice. She didn't care at all that she might be putting on quite the show to their waiter. "Sure you have told me, but I don't even remember any of it. You keep telling me to move on from the past I have forgotten. But wouldn't that include conveniently ignoring what Summer did? I don't even know why she did it, in case YOU have forgotten I don't really talk to anyone from back home and I have no idea why!"
Marcello's eyes grew wider than they ever had before and it was going to be hard to put on the front that he wasn't interested. As he heard Marissa explain to her mother her frustration, his mind began to wander and he forgot that he was currently pouring Julie's water. It had begun to over flow onto the table and by the time he when he finally realized what he was doing he jerked up, causing the glass to fall over into Julie's lap.
Julie yelped and jumped up out of her seat, knocking her knees into the table, causing everything to rattle and the glass to shatter loudly onto the floor. Suddenly Marcello wasn't the ONLY one watching the two American girls.
"You clumsy little idiot!" She managed to get out in the middle of her scream. "Look what you have done! Do you have any idea how expensive this suit was?" She looked down onto her now soaked lap.
Marcello opened his mouth to tell her exactly how much the suit had cost but was interrupted by a chuckle coming from the other side of the table.
Marissa couldn't help but laugh, and didn't bother covering her mouth to stifle it. "Relax Mom, I am sure that Marcello didn't mean it. Besides its only water, and as many times as I have wanted to test the theory that you are the wicked witch of the west, I am sure that you unfortunately will not melt."
Marcello turned to Marissa and smiled once more, she knew who he was, and had remembered his name. He knew that he liked this girl for a reason.
But with Marissa's words, it only caused Julie to fall into an even bigger outrage. Not only was she paranoid beyond anything, she now looked like she had wet herself and her own daughter was making fun of her.
"I don't need to stand here and listen to my own daughter make fun of me." Julie used her napkin to try to soak up some of the water.
"Oh don't worry Mother, you don't need me to help you with that." This time it was Marcello who had laughed out loud, but at least he had the decency to cover his mouth, shocked but his lack of control over his emotions.
"Oh just lovely." Julie began. "Marissa, be ready in ten minutes, we are leaving as soon as I go and get cleaned up." And with that Julie stormed off yelling Joseppi's name, and definitely causing an even bigger scene than before.
With the red haired woman now gone, Marissa and Marcello were left there giggling softly to themselves. Marcello moved down to begin to pick up the glass pieces and Marissa stopped him.
"Let me." She moved over to where she knew they kept the broom and dust pan, and began to help him clean up.
Marcello stood there for a moment watching the beautiful blonde clean up his mess and smiled softly to himself. "I'm so sorry about that. I didn't mean to…"
"What for, interrupting our embarrassing argument, or spilling water on my ungrateful, gold digging mother?" Marissa stood back up and handed him the dustpan. "Trust me both I am grateful for."
Marcello took them from her and smiled. He liked this girl that was for sure. "Why is it that we never have chatted it up before now?"
Marissa just shrugged and moved to sit back down at the vacant table. "Don't ask me, I never knew that fabulously gay boys could be so quiet." She crossed her legs and smiled towards him.
"Oh trust me honey, I'm anything BUT quiet, and I'm even nosier to boot." He stood there, completely interested in this girl now, and wanting to know even more than before. "Speaking of being nosey, what was that about before? Your mom seemed pretty paranoid." He sat down where Julie once sat and continued his conversation.
Marissa shrugged her shoulders. It was a common argument between her and her mother really, so much so that she didn't even really know what it was about. "The mystery of Julie Cooper and the way she thinks is beyond me. She always gets that way when I try to talk about my friends from back home."
And now that Marcello seemed to be breaking ground, he gained courage and decided to ask more. "Why don't you ever talk to them?" That was the part of the conversation that he definitely heard clearly enough.
"To be honest, I am not really sure. I guess now it's just been too long to go back. I mean things are different now, and god knows that I'm different. I guess maybe this is how it really was meant to be" It sounded like a rehearsed answer, one that Marissa had been practicing to tell someone for quite awhile… perhaps three years. And then she thought about it a bit more. It had been three years since the accident, and even if she was at odds with Summer, she couldn't help but think that they had been friends for far too long to just completely forget about each other. And as for the others, she was somewhat embarrassed. She was told that talking to them would only cause her more confusion. Could she really face them knowing that she barely remembered them?
"I think about them all the time, I guess I just…" She continued on with her thoughts and Marcello chimed in.
"Well get over it already. You can't completely forget about where you came from, I'm sure everyone back home really misses you. And from the looks of it you miss them too."
Marissa looked up into Marcello's unique eyes and smiled softly. Did they miss her? OR had they long forgotten about her? She wished she had that option to at least remember.
"It's more complicated than that." She admitted, not thinking that Marcello had any clue to her amnesia.
"Why don't you tell me more about it then? Help me to understand." He asked. But as soon as Marissa looked as if she were really about to open up, someone was clearing their throat behind them. Marcello jumped up out of his seat and turned to come face to face with Julie.
"Marissa." She spoke her name, but stared at Marcello, giving him the 'don't mess with me look. "Are you ready to go? The shops await us."
Marissa rolled her eyes and reluctantly stood up. She didn't want to spend any more time with her mother, especially like this, but maybe she could use this trip to guilt her into buying those new shoes she wanted.
"Alright mom, let's go." With that Marissa walked by a stunned Marcello. For a brief moment she placed her hand on his shoulder and smiled to him. Whispering in his ear she said, "We should hang out sometime." And with that she walked past him and off with her mother.
Marcello frowned slightly. He was so close to getting more information about the situation and failed. He at least confirmed the fact that not all her memory was lost, but they pretty much knew that anyway. Summer would have been so ecstatic to find out more. But now Marissa was more to him than just a mystery to be solved. He felt sorry for Marissa, and he couldn't wait to help her. He and Summer might have their work cut out for them, but he was up for the challenge.
She stood there only a few feet away from the target. She could feel her hands moisten with sweat, as her gaze fell once again object at hand. Her eyes burned into the minute entity hoping that maybe while she was gone it would just disappear. Her plan had worked to leave the room for a few hours; distracting herself temporarily from the object she now had in her possession. But that didn't change the fact that she still had a huge decision to make once she returned. And sure enough the moment she walked into the room, it was as if there were a hundred little devils taunting her, poking her with their forks and telling her in sinister whispers that she had to make a choice. The hardest part was, they weren't even forcing her to go one way or another, just to make a choice was hard enough. She groaned to herself and finally let go of her reservations. Like bottled up water being released from a damn she spout over to it and jumped on the bed. Taking it in her hands she opened it up and her eyes began to read the scribbles over the pages.
Everything was exceedingly familiar. There were just some things that really never change. The constant motion of the Pacific Ocean, the way a four year old child never gets sick of asking 'why', knowing that Sandy would always crack his self righteous jokes at the most inappropriate times, and at the top of the list was the way the pool house smelled, looked and made Ryan feel. Everything was still perfectly in place and identical to what it was when he was in high school. Even the smell was the same. And there he was once more, back at that same place. Not just physically but emotionally as well. He had thought that he had gotten past all the old feelings the pool house brought back to him every time he stepped into it. The once amazing memories were now tainted with pain. After Marissa had left, the pool house just wasn't the same and he had found it most difficult to enjoy being in the place he once found so much security in. However, the past year with Isabella by his side, he had successfully been able to at least sleep there when he came home on Holiday and NOT freak out. It was slowly getting better, until he was ripped back into his old thoughts. Due to his recent yearbook browsing and dreams, his anguish and insecurities came back ten fold.
And yet he was trying desperately to ignore it and get past the struggles. He had grown a lot in the past year, and he wasn't about to fall back to the same place he once was without a fight. It wasn't fair to himself, nor was it fair to Isabella. He paused from the sketches he was doing and looked up to his girlfriend laying on his bed. She was laying on her side. Wearing a semi paisley form fitting top, to show off her full breasts and simple low rise jeans, his eyes went from the curls of her gorgeous brown hair, to the curves of her body. He knew that he had something great with her. She was one of the most passionate people he had ever known. She was intelligent, and outgoing, and she forced him to come out of his shell. And he knew that some day she would make an amazing counselor. She was always there to listen to him, and she gave the best advice ever, almost as good as Sandy's. He just wished that he could open up to her more. But he always had a hard time with words, and she was the extreme opposite; incredibly articulate, and never afraid to say what she was feeling. He admired that in her, and wished that sometimes he could be as open. And the way she kissed… so gentle, and with so much behind each one. There was only one other girl in his life that he felt something more with. He smiled at his thoughts, and continued to stare along her features both on her face and on her body. They really had come along way, and he was thankful for that.
As Ryan stared, Izzy could feel eyes upon her and looked up. Ryan was sitting on the floor with his back leaning up against a few oversized stacked pillows. Because the bed was low to the ground he was able to look into Izzy's green eyes easily. He smiled and she closed the book she was reading.
"What?" She asked him, wondering why he was looking at her so strangely.
"Nothing, I was just watching you." He set his sketches aside and continued to look at her.
"Well I see that weirdo, but aren't you supposed to be finishing up your work? Seth is going to be pretty suspicious and angry if you ditch him yet again to say that you have too much work to do." She smiled and tucked a piece of her thick curly hair behind her ears.
"Well what if I tell him, I couldn't hang out because I had something else to do?" He wiggled his eyebrows a bit, and couldn't help but smirk.
Isabella saw the look in his eyes and laughed lightly. "Oh what, so now I'm a thing?"
Ryan shrugged and without a word and crawled over to the bed. Izzy naturally fell onto her back to welcome him and Ryan climbed on top of her. He could do this, he wanted to do this, he told himself. He wanted to open up to her, and give her what she deserved. He loved his girlfriend, and needed to prove to himself that he had moved on. He stared down at her with intense cobalt eyes and let the back of his hand run lightly down the side of her face.
Izzy could feel her stomach do flip flops at his touch and returned his smile softly. "Are we doing this?" She asked in a soft whisper, dying for him to answer in the affirmative. She had been craving inside for him to open up to her, but he just wouldn't. And there was something more. They had been dating for quite some time, and although they never lacked with fire between the sheets, whenever they were in Newport Ryan was different. He held back in not only his true emotions but in everything else, even his kisses. And although she wasn't sure if Ryan understood what she meant by 'doing this,' she wanted him so badly... but not just physically, she wanted his heart. And for some reason, she knew that if they could make love here, it would be a stride in the right direction. There was something about Newport, something about this place, and she wanted to know what it was.
Again Ryan didn't speak to her nor did he even bother to nod or shrug. Instead he answered her by lowering his body down so that it pressed against hers softly. His lips met hers in an extremely zealous kiss. His tongue wasted no time separating her lips and entering into her own mouth. It was unlike Ryan. Even when he was most antsy, he still went slow, and enjoyed all their time together. But it was as if he took his time he might actually turn back. Even with this gorgeous woman in front of him, one he loved very much, this was going to be hard…. Even if he wanted it.
Izzy returned his kisses with just as much passion. But she wasn't sure she liked him so aggressive. Not that they hadn't had pretty wild sex before, but they were just sharing an intimate moment, one she wanted to last longer. And so with great struggle she pushed him back lightly and smiled to him. Letting him know she wanted to continue, but wanted to change the pace, she just stared, tracing her hands down his chest softly and to the bottom of his shirt. As soon as she gripped the hem, she pulled it over his head slowly and leaned up again to take his lips once more. This time she started the kiss off slow, but with more passion than she thought she could ever have. Her hands ran over his broad shoulders slowly, wanting to feel every inch of his skin. Their legs entwined together, and Ryan fit comfortably straddling just one. She lifted her outside leg to run her knee along his side and Ryan began to moan into the kiss.
If Isabella was trying to get him to forget his worries, Ryan was pretty sure it had worked. As soon as she took the initiative to take off his shirt, he remembered how much he loved to kiss this girl, to hold this girl, to make love to this girl. He looked down to her and smiled wide. And as soon as their lips met again his eyes closed. As they continued to make out, one of his hands found her neck, and he cupped it with the inside of his hand to hold her face close to his. He didn't want to stop now, this felt amazing and he began to forget where he was altogether. His other hand moved down her collar bone, and with a little bit of pressure he ran it further along the outside of her shirt and over her breast.
Izzy was in heaven, but then again she was every time they were together. She could feel her heart start to beat faster, and her breathing grew very heavy and deep. The kissing grew even more intense. Their noses pressed together and their lips danced with one another. Ryan then pulled back once more and smiled. Izzy took a moment to catch her breath. Then Ryan leaned down and kissed the side of her lips, to her chin and began to go towards her neck. At the same time his hand moved down further to her side and began to creep up her shirt. As his lips met her neck, he lightly blew on her bare skin and then barely touched his lips to her neck, using a different technique than normal.
Isabella giggled lightly and pushed him back. "Ticklish."
Ryan pulled back and smiled. "Sorry." But before anything else could happen Isabella pulled him down again to kiss him once more.
And like that, Ryan was taken back to six years ago...
It was a perfectly clear Newport night. But the young couple wouldn't even know. They were in the pool house. Marissa was lying on the bed breathing slowly and heavily as she looked up into Ryan's eyes. Ryan moved down, lightly pressing his body to hers and began to kiss her. Marissa's hand was upon Ryan's neck and it seemed Ryan couldn't get enough of the taste of her lips. Then he moved to her right side, sinking into her neck and kissing that just as passionately.
"Ticklish." Marissa whispered slightly with a smile.
Ryan stops reluctantly and smiles once more. "Sorry" And then he returns to her lips. As they continue, Ryan uses his right hand to move up Marissa's blue t-shirt, rubbing smoothly and firmly up her side.
Marissa stops him and pulls speaks. "Hey, what time do you have?"
Ryan couldn't stop. He needed more of her, and so he didn't bother to stop kissing her as he spoke. In between kisses he mumbles. "Mmmm, almost eleven. What time do you have to be back at your dads?"
Marissa smiles and speaks again. "Soon."
More mumbling, "How soon?"
Marissa laughs once more and answers. "Now."
Ryan pulled back his eyes wide. But instead of seeing Marissa below him it was Isabella. He blinked a few times, and snapped back into reality. He couldn't believe what had just happened. He was dumbfounded and had to pull away.
"Ryan? What's wrong?" Isabella sat up. She had thought that things were going well. At least on her end, and his abrupt stop caught her off guard.
Ryan didn't know what to do. His breathing was heavy and he realized that he was just dreaming... day dreaming, something. He just wasn't in the same place she was, and instant guilt filled his soul. He looked to Izzy and ran a hand through his blonde hair. "I'm sorry, I... I just had to catch my breath." He lied, why was he lying?
Isabella knew that something else was wrong, and it bothered her that he just wouldn't tell her. She frowned and looked over to him. "'Well did you want to stop. I mean, I was having a great time, but if something is on your mind I don't care if we..."
"No, of course not." Ryan interrupted her. This was hard, he didn't want to do this to Isabella. He moved back over to her and laid down on his side. She followed suite laying on her side as well and looking into his eyes.
"Ok, it's just... I don't know, you seem off." She looked even more concerned. When she looked into his eyes they seemed hazy and lost, and it scared her. She had seen this look before, but it had been a long time. "Ryan..." She let her hand reach up to touch the side of his face. "I love you."
Ryan smiled at her words. He loved her too, but for some reason he just couldn't say it. He leaned back in again and kissed her softly.
"You aren't very talkative tonight?" Isabella pointed out, but smiled underneath his kiss.
"I'm never talkative." He responded and kissed her again. "But I am good with my lips in other ways."
Izzy smiled but welcomed his change of mood almost immediately. It was driving her crazy, but she loved him, and in a way accepted it.
Ryan moved closer to her. Though still on their sides, he moved with ease to assault her body with sweet sweet kisses again and again, pausing only for a moment to speak. "I do have to prove to you just how 'on' I can be."
Izzy laughed and pushed him onto his back. Moving on top of him, she placed either leg around his waist to straddle him. She leaned back down and her hair fell in front of her face. Ryan pushed her hair back away so that he was free to kiss her again. "Oh, so that is all I have to do now to get you to kiss me like that, is challenge you?" She shook her head, and he moved to kiss her chest lightly. "Typical male."
Ryan groaned lightly, and to show his typical manliness he sat up, picking Izzy up with him with ease, and flipped her onto her back so that he could hover back over her. "But don't you love that about me?"
Isabella felt his strong arms on her sides, and when he lifted her up, it only turned her on more. She laughed lightly, but when he asked his question she shook her head denying his acquisition.
"Hell no!" She laughed and so did Ryan.
After they got done laughing, Ryan looked down to her. How could he have flashbacks of Marissa while kissing Isabella? It wasn't like they were anything alike. And he was different now too. He stared into her green eyes and leaned down, but didn't kiss her yet.
"Ryan if you want, we can just watch some TV or go back to doing our work." Isabella was now becoming paranoid. She could see the thoughts turning in his head, and she just wanted to make him feel comfortable.
"Do I look like I want to watch TV?" He pressed his lower body into hers so that she could feel how hard he had gotten in their first make out session.
She moaned slightly and closed her eyes. It was all he had to say. This time it was she who attacked his lips. Her hands wrapped around to his bare back, and she lightly dug her finger nails into his skin. She had never remembered wanting him more. Ryan's hands began to explore as well; down her sides, and to the top of her jeans. He let his thumbs read down between the fabric and her skin, and he began to start to tug against them. He then lifted the lower half of his body so that he could reach between them and begin to unbutton her jeans. Without even bothering to pull them down he slipped his hand into the front of them and pressed the palm of it on the outside of her panties.
Isabella moaned, and arched her back pushing her hips forward to meet him. Her hands went further down his back and ran firmly over his butt. She pulled him towards her so that he was forced to press his entire body onto his hand and into her more.
Their kisses became more and more frantic; they needed each other and they needed each other now. This was it, Isabella thought, this was their moment. Ryan pulled back with a very satisfied smile upon his face. He was incredibly turned on, and couldn't wait to go further. "Am I on now?" He had to just ask.
Isabella, who was having trouble speaking because she was breathing so heavy looked up to him and smiled. "Well almost."
His eyes grew wide and shook his head. He mocked being frustrated, as if he wasn't enough. "What do you want from me?"
Suddenly Isabella's face grew serious. Ryan's fingers had made their way inside her underwear and had already begun to please her. His other hand had successfully pushed up her shirt and was lightly rubbing her stomach. All Isabella managed to say was, "I want you." With that she closed her eyes and Ryan's lips crashed back into hers.
When Ryan's eyes closed, he was brought back in time once more. This time about three years ago….
Marissa and Ryan had just recently entered the pool house. He remembered the night just like it was yesterday. Their relationship had been on the rocks, but he had never stopped loving her. He was frustrated and just wanted things to be the way they once were. Marissa looked to him as he moved to sit on the edge of the bed. She joined him by sitting on the stool next to it.
"Look, I know it's going to take more than Thai food and teen movies to sort this out but… if you want to talk…" She left the end of the sentence open, wondering what Ryan really did want. She was afraid of what he was going to say.
Ryan looked to Marissa and then removed his gaze from her. "Talking is the last thing I feel like doing."
Marissa sighed softly to herself. "I figured since you gave me silent treatment the whole way in the car."
Ryan, not hiding his frustration replied, "What do you want from me?" He looked back towards Marissa, sadness in his eyes.
Marissa's heart felt like it had stopped. Didn't he know? She looked to him, away, and then back to him once more. "I want you." The look upon her face was innocent and vulnerable. She moved to touch his arm and look him directly into his eyes. She then leaned forward, touched the side of his neck lightly and leaned in to kiss him. She was hesitant at first, afraid that he might reject her. Her hands floated for a moment on either side of his face, almost as if she was afraid to touch him. But she knew she had to do this.
Ryan hesitated at first. He wanted to resist but he knew deep down that he couldn't. He loved her far too much and no matter what they were going through, he knew she was the one. After trying to resist for only a few seconds, Ryan finally brought his one hand up behind her head, cupping it and holder her lips to his. And that was when the kiss intensified. It was full of so many things, the release of tension, amazing desire, but most of all love.
They never stopped loving each other. It didn't take long for the make out session to move to the next level. As soon as they both let go of their reservations and remembered how to just be them, Marissa found herself lowering herself gracefully onto Ryan's bed. Marissa reached up to lightly wrap her arms around Ryan's head to pull him on top of her. As soon as he was there, she released her head, and her hands fond their way to his face again, as if it was something to be treasured.
Their lips continued to dance perfectly with one another. They were made to be together, they both knew that. Ryan ran his hand through her soft golden hair, and things begin to heat up some more. Suddenly they realized that they had too many clothes on. Ryan began to help Marissa take her jacket off, first one arm and then switching to the other side. But as he began to slip the second one off they were interrupted with the all too familiar ring of Marissa's cell phone.
Ryan snapped out of it once more, when he realized that it was Isabella's shirt he was removing and not Marissa's jacket. He blinked a few times, wondering what was going on in his head. Luckily this time, they were so into it, that Isabella didn't notice his hesitation. Ryan felt like he was going crazy. His ghosts would not stop haunting him. He shut his eyes tightly, trying to block it out of his head. He continued to kiss Izzy, and try to make her feel good. But inside his head was swirling and he was getting dizzy.
He tried again, to block it out, but this time the images grew more vivid in his brain. And this time they as they came back they weren't as pleasant. Ryan in reality was on his back, and Isabella was rubbing he hands down his chest, and moving them over his stomach and to the top of his jeans. But his eyes were closed and in his mind he was staring at a shattered Marissa. Her face was gaunt and it was hard for her to keep her eyes open. Her normally beautifully flush lips were almost as pale as her face. And as she turned her head, Ryan could see the large gash on the right side of her face. Her gorgeous hair was soaked with sticky deep red blood.
As Isabella moved down to kiss him once more, he imagined it was the tortured Marissa coming towards him. He could feel his eyes start to well up and suddenly he jumped.
"Isabella stop!" He lifted her up off of him and stood up so quickly, Izzy had no idea what had happened.
She lay there half naked and feeling completely exposed. She started to shake as she saw Ryan began to pace around the room, acting like he was claustrophobic and needed to get out. He was sweaty and red; Isabella had never seen him like that before. And because it came from no where, she couldn't help but at first think that it was something she had done.
"Ryan…" she started off timidly, her voice was shaky. She grabbed for her shirt and put it back on.
But Ryan didn't turn around, he kept his back to her, fighting off the tears of frustration. He clenched his fits. He suddenly wanted to hit something. He tried taking a deep breath, successfully keeping the tears in, but in the mean time his stomach began to feel queasy.
Isabella buttoned her pants and moved to get up off the bed. For a moment she just stood there, too terrified to approach him. But she was more scared not to. "Ryan." She tried again. She reached out to touch his shoulder. "Ryan are you ok?"
With her touch, Ryan jumped, and immediately regretted his reaction. What was he doing? He had thought that he could do this, but maybe he was just fooling himself. A tear escaped Izzy's eye as he jumped. She took her hand back and hugged her arms around her own curvy body.
Ryan turned around to face her. And the look upon her smooth face broke his heart. "I'm so sorry Isabella." He remained further away from her, but stayed facing her.
Isabella didn't know what to say, or how to react. One moment they were about to make love, and she had never been so turned on in her life, and the next he wouldn't even let her touch him. Her full pink lips trembled and she looked up to him once more. "Ryan, please tell me what is wrong. Please, you are scaring me." She pleaded with him; she couldn't take it anymore.
"It's not you, Isabella." He reassured her instantly. He didn't want to her to think for a second that she had done anything wrong. But when she looked at him to ask him what it really was, he wasn't sure how to say it. "It's this place." He began to look around. He closed his eyes for a moment to try to fight the demons coming back. "They remind me too much of her." He hadn't even realized it, but Ryan had just admitted something big.
Isabella's heart sank. She felt like suddenly she couldn't breath and she had to back up to sit on the edge of the bed. All of her fears were coming true. He was thinking of Marissa… wait, he was thinking of her while they were sharing this moment? She ran her hand over her face and looked down to the ground. "Of Marissa." She spoke so softly and her voice was unrecognizable.
Ryan looked to her confused. Did she just say her name? Yes, he had mentioned Marissa before, but he had always left out the details, so how could she possibly know who it was that he was referring to. "I… " It was the only letter he could get out, before he closed his mouth again.
Isabella regained her courage and looked back up to him. She didn't know that this much pain even existed. She was the reason why they hadn't moved forward in their relationship. SHE was the thing Ryan couldn't let go of. And thanks to Kirsten, she now knew why. Should she tell him what she knew? The selfish side of her wanted to keep it a secret. If he knew where Summer was, and what she knew, would he go too? But Isabella also knew that if she kept it to herself it still might not do any good. Whether or not, he had hope of her return or not, she would still continue to affect their relationship.
"Ryan, talk to me." She pressed him once more. She didn't want to have to tell him, she just wanted him to admit it all, to trust her and to confide in her. To tell her what he went through after the accident.
Ryan blinked and looked down to the ground. He knew that if he ever wanted to move forward with Izzy, he just had to be honest with her. And maybe if he talked about his past with her, the demons would be released. The thing was, he wasn't completely sure he was ready to let go of them yet. He didn't speak verbally, he just looked back up to her and spoke to her with his eyes.
Isabella looked at him and knew that he wasn't going to talk to her. He never did when it came to something real. She sighed softly and let out a long breath. No more thinking, she knew what she had to do. She couldn't be afraid of the outcome of telling him what she knew, because right now, things couldn't get worse than this.
"Ryan I know." She stated simply.
His eyes shot up to her. What did she mean she 'knew'? What exactly did she know? He squinted his eyes lightly, waiting for her to further explain.
Isabella may have not known every single detail, but with the information she had received, along with knowing Ryan pretty well, and just being an intelligent girl, she put two and two together.
"I know what happened to Marissa."
"Oh my Holy Prada shoes, you talked to her about me?" The look on Summer's face was priceless. Marcello was in the middle of telling her about his interaction with Marissa and Julie. As soon as he had left the restaurant, he couldn't wait to run to the hotel and tell Summer all about it, even if he hadn't gotten as much information as he had wanted. He was a drama queen, and lived for this stuff, especially when he was the messenger. Besides, any attention he could get from his new best friend, he would lavish in.
Summer wasn't in complete shock. Her suspicions had merely been confirmed. Marissa's memory wasn't completely lost. If it was, how would she even remember her at all? But now that some of the simpler questions had been answered, they opened up so many more: why she hadn't come home, or at least tried to contact her? How had Julie lied to everyone about Marissa's true condition? Was it Marissa's choice or Julie's? And how much did Marissa actually know?
Marcello wrinkled his nose a bit at her reaction and laughed. "What are you batgirl meets designer princess or something?"
"No, Little Miss Vixen." She corrected him quickly but blew off his joke because she wanted to know more.
Again he looked at her confused and shook his head. He didn't want to know, and continued on. "You should have seen the look on Julie's face when the water spilled all over her lap!"
Summer just shook her head, she definitely wished she had been there to see that. Then again, if she had, then Marcello wouldn't have been able to talk to Marissa. So as much as any Julie embarrassment would have made her entire year, this was more important.
"When you heard my name, what was she like? Did she look like she missed me?" Summer begged to know more. "I mean, if she remembers me, why hasn't she contacted me?"
Marcello who was sitting with his legs folded and crossed in front of him, was across from Summer on the large king sized bed. He wasn't sure what to say. He had a hard time understanding it all himself. He only wished he could have asked more questions.
He took a deep breath and began to speak. "To be honest, I think that she seemed confused. I know you are right about her remembering you Bella, but there is still something missing. She seemed scared, and when I asked her why she hadn't tried to contact her friends from home she clammed up."
"That's my Marissa." Summer nodded. "She really was never one to just show her emotions out right. She would rather hide behind things like her vodka than face her tribulations." She paused for a moment to ponder. "She is just like Hope on the Valley. I swear sometimes I think that character was based directly off of her."
Marcello nodded. With the comparison of his favorite character from his favorite American show, he understood Marissa so much more. "Oh my gosh, could you believe her in the middle of last season? She was driving me completely mad. If it wasn't for her turn around at Prom and Graduation I was going to lose faith in her altogether."
Summer nodded in agreement, falling into the trap to gossip about the best show known to man. "Oh I know, and the way she treated Nicole, when she was only trying to be her friend and save her from that walking STD… I wanted to strangle her!"
They both grew silent with smiles upon their face as the reminisced about the latest season of the Valley. Then they both remembered what they were discussing, and without missing a beat, both returned to the topic at hand.
"She said something like it has been too long now to go back to her old life. But I think that was a weak excuse, I know there is something more." Summer pondered some more as Marcello continued. "She was going to tell me about it when her vile mother interrupted us."
Summer rolled her eyes at the thought of Julie ruining their plans once again. But that didn't discourage her, Marcello's information gave her the boost she needed to vibrate at a high frequency once again, and she was ready for round two. "Do you know where they are right now?"
"Of course, they were headed down town to the Cinecitta Due Centro Commerciale!" He smiled at the thought one of the biggest shopping centers in Rome. "What I wouldn't give to shop with those girls. As determined as Julie is, and fashionable and Marissa is, I would be sure to get the best of the best in no time at all."
Summer stood up and offered her hand to help him. "Well you may just get your wish."
Marcello accepted her hand and pulled himself up to stand next to her. "What? Where are you going?"
"WE… are going to go follow them." Summer explained.
Marcello's eyes widened. "We are?"
"Of course we are, your initial interaction with her only makes me want to know more. And we aren't going to know more by just sitting around." She got up from the bed and moved over to her suitcase. "I know I have me pink oversized Dolce & Gabbana sunglasses here somewhere." She began rummaging through her suitcase and continued talking. "Do you have a hat or sunglasses for yourself?"
"Please do you honestly think I'm going to ruin this fabulous hair by putting on a hat? I'm having a great hair day." But before Marcello could say anything else, Summer had found a hat in her suitcase and went over and stood on her tip toes to put it on his head. "Hey!"
"If we are going to be following them around, and really want to find more out, then they can't recognize us." Summer stared, and put her hair back in a pony tail. Marcello opened his mouth to speak. "Don't argue with me."
Marcello sighed. He knew there was no use trying to debate. And truth was, he was more than up for the mission. But, he just had to complain anyway. They both started to disguise themselves the best they could, wearing jeans, oversized sweatshirts and of course hats and sunglasses.
"You know how much this kills me. I haven't worn clothes this big since I was trying to pretend I was straight in the fifth grade. Even then I wasn't very convincing." He adjusted his sunglasses and looked to Summer.
She had her pink over sized D&G sunglasses, with a hoody that she would use later with the hood up once they got near the Cooper girls. Marcello looked surprisingly butch in his 'baggy' sweatshirt, hat, and sunglasses. They stared at each other and then both looked in the mirror both satisfied with how they looked.
Summer nodded to him and smiled. "You pull of heterosexuality quite well."
"Eww don't even say that out loud again." He adjusted his hat once more and smiled. "Besides I wouldn't want to get your hopes up and break your heart."
Summer rolled her eyes and moved towards the door. "You wish." She looked around the room and then remembered she forgot her purse. She moved over to the bed and picked it up. Underneath it was the journal she and Marcello took from Marissa's room. She turned and headed for the door again.
Marcello noticed it. "So did you do it?" Marcello asked as the moved through the door and towards the lifts.
"Do what?" Summer decided to play dumb, and of course she knew how to do it well, even if it had been awhile.
He paused and put his hand on his hips. Even through all his 'straight gear' he still looked extremely gay. "Cute." He stated simply. "You know exactly what I am talking about."
And yet Summer just looked to him and shrugged.
"Please do not tell me you didn't even take a peek? Summer, you want to know more, and that is the perfect opportunity to do so!" The lift opened and they both walked inside. He couldn't believe that Summer still hadn't read the journal.
"I just feel like its invading someone's privacy. It was taunting me all day. I almost did it once, but then I realized I'd rather just find things out the right way." She stated simply. But Marcello really had no idea how hard it was for her to not look inside.
"By the right way, you mean following them around shopping, while looking like idiots? You Americans sure do things backwards." He sighed and just as the bell dinged to indicate they had reached the bottom floor, Summer swatted him across the shoulder.
"I do things my own way. And I am not about to be one of those friends who snoops. It may be hard enough to get Marissa to open up to me as it is. So I'm not about to give her a reason not to trust me." Summer explained herself as they moved to the Vespas Marcello had borrowed for them again.
And then it hit him, he had forgotten to tell Summer the most important part. "That reminds me." He put on his helmet over his hat, making him look even more goofy. "Right before I interrupted Julie and Marissa talking today, there was something odd that Julie said, that just didn't sit right with me."
"Julie always says something odd, but go on." She put her helmet on and strapped it under her chin.
"She said, 'don't forget what she did to you.' And I can't possibly understand what she meant by it." He started up his Vespa and looked to her for her reaction.
"What –I- did to her? What in the world did I do to her?" Summer tried to think what she could have possibly done. She was very confused and tried hard to think of the options. And then suddenly it hit her. "THAT BITCH!"
There was no humorous name calling, no five word description, just flat out 'bitch,' and Marcello was taken back. "What's wrong?"
Summer started her Vespa, with a very determined look upon her face. "Do I have to explain everything?" She shook her head. "I never did anything wrong, she must have made something up so Marissa wouldn't try to contact me!" She was fuming so much; she couldn't believe how conniving Julie really was. "I wish I knew what it was, so I was prepared to defend myself."
"I bet it's in the journal." Marcello pointed out.
She glared at him and shook her head. "It's not happening." And with that she pressed on the gas and they were off down the road.
About fifteen minutes later, the dynamic duo had already parked their scooters and were walking around the shopping center where Marcello said Marissa and Julie went to all of the time. As promised, Summer's hood was up, and her sunglasses were on. And of course Marcello was still wearing his hat no matter how much he complained to Summer, he wasn't going to win that argument. They were currently ducking in and out of stores, trying to find where the Cooper girls were.
Summer was directing Marcello into all of the shops she was sure Marissa and Julie would be in. Even if Marissa lost some of her memory, she was sure she would still have the same fashion sense. But they still couldn't seem to find them.
Just when they were going to have to brainstorm where else they might be, Marcello spotted the twiggy blonde and her fiery mother. They had just walked into a Fendi store, both hauling a few bags in each hand from other various shops. Marcello perked up and pointed. "There they are!" He smiled getting excited at his discovery.
Summer instantly turned around to see, and as soon as it was confirmed with her own eyes she pulled the hood further over her face and ducked behind a near by potted tree. She was silent for a few moments just observing the two women she once knew so well. Suddenly she got a little queasy in the stomach. Could she really do this?
She continued to stare, like a true trust fund girl watching her credit cards being cut up, and Marcello, who had followed in tow behind her, was peering over her shoulder. "Are you ok?" He asked, wondering what she was feeling seeing Marissa with her mother.
"What?" She asked, being drawn out of her state of trance. "Oh yeah, lets go see if we can hear them talking." She grabbed Marcello by the hand and they made their way into the store. The shop was somewhat small, and they didn't have a ton of options to hide out. Julie was off talking to one of the clerks and Marissa was checking out a few of the bags that were at a discounted price.
Marissa and Marcello stooped down the other little aisle which was towards Marissa's back. Marcello tapped Summer on the shoulder as he saw Julie walking back towards Marissa. As she walked by them, Summer grabbed an oversized bag and put it in front of her face. And in the most weak Italian accent ever she spoke, "Look at the detail on this one, Antonio. Isn't it exquisite?"
Marcello stifled a laugh but when Summer elbowed him in the ribs he coughed and spoke. "It's wonderful darling." And with that they both peeked there heads slowly around the bag to see Julie walk over to Marissa.
"Marissa honey, why are you in the clearance section, it isn't like we can't afford the others." Julie spoke out loud. She was trying desperately to mend what had happened earlier in the day. After she left the restaurant with Marissa they had quite the argument.
Marissa looked up as her mother approached. "First of all, it isn't our money it's Joseppi's, and I happen to like this bag." She held up a beige and red large hobo bag with Leather trim.
Julie studied the bag and smiled. "You always did have the best eye for fashion Marissa, you must get it from me." She smiled and nodded in approval.
Summer gasped and Marcello looked at her immediately. Julie had heard the gasp and turned to look their way, and immediately Marcello pulled her down so that they were in a crouched position below a shelf.
"Are you TRYING to give us away!" He yelled in a loud whisper.
"I'm sorry, it's just I just got that bag shipped to me at the end of last semester! It was my favorite purchase that month." She explained to him why she was so shocked.
Marcello couldn't help but laugh and rolled his eyes. Luckily Julie hadn't seen the pair, and moved her attention back to Marissa.
"So is that the one you want then?" Julie smiled once more, hoping that after their shopping trip she and Marissa would be on good terms again.
But Marissa wasn't stupid, she knew her mom was just trying to buy her approval back from her. And normally she wouldn't let her, but for some reason today she was going to take advantage of it. "Yeah I guess." But she wasn't going to give her the satisfaction of seeing any enthusiasm.
Julie smiled weakly and took the bag from her stubborn daughter. She then turned and moved towards the cashier to pay for the bag on Joseppi's credit card. Marissa stayed back to continue to browse.
Summer and Marcello watched as Julie walked by, and then looked at each other. "I think that you should go talk to her." Marcello suggested. "We aren't going to find anything out by watching them shop. Maybe now is the time."
Summer, still trying to whisper stood up a bit to watch Marissa move to the wallet section. She stared again for a few minutes. She had been waiting for this day for so long, and now that it was finally here she didn't know how to execute it. She wasn't normally one that hesitated or doubted her actions. But this was a delicate situation. She turned to Marcello quite nervous. "What if…"
"What if nothing, she is your best friend, and no matter what she thinks happened between you, she is going to be happy to see you." He tried to encourage her, and pushed her a little towards the back where the wallets were displayed.
But Summer hesitated more and pushed back on him. "But maybe it's too soon, maybe I should go back and read the journal, to know what I'm up against." She began to make excuses. This was so unlike Summer, when was she ever afraid of confrontation?
Marcello just shook his head, a little disappointed in his friend, and trying to persuade her to do what he thought was best. "Summer you already told me that reading the journal was a bad idea, so don't give me that nonsense. Just go out and do it!"
They were in a heated whisper, and their hands started to fly around as they talked silently. They were both so into trying to convince the other of what to do, that they hadn't seen Julie turn their way and down their aisle.
Julie's head was down, and she was busy looking at the purchases she had just made, and just as she looked up she was practically on top of the back of Summer. "Oh excuse me." She actually sounded quite genuine.
Summer who was too busy defending her actions didn't even realize it was Julie's voice. She turned to step out of the way and her hood fell down to her shoulders. As soon as her shaded eyes met Julie's she gasped again. She felt like her stomach had not only churned but jumped out of her throat. Marcello who was facing Julie to begin with stood there with wide eyes.
Julie couldn't believe her eyes either. She blinked a few times and then gritted her teeth together. "You." She spoke one word, and didn't know what else to day. Then she tried to smile, unaware that her faux happiness to see her daughter's beset friend was the worst acting either of them had ever seen. "What are you doing here?"
Although Summer was timid before, seeing Julie made all of her reservations vanish instantly. "Well you see, I've lost my mind, and I heard Rome was the best place for doctors, and I thought I would check it out." She could feel the temperature in the room going up, and things around her going black.
Julie laughed uncomfortably, and honestly wasn't sure what to say. Should she continue with her lies? Part of her almost wanted to cry, she had to think of something fast. However, before she could think of any sort of response Marcello chimed in. "I think you might want to say something, before you experience the worst rage blackout in history."
If Summer could, she would have laughed at her new friend's response. It was cute to hear him say 'rage blackout' in his thick Italian accent. But her eyes and soul were focused on a speechless Julie.
Finally she started to speak. "Summer my dear, if I would have known you were coming, I would have…"
"Who are you talking to mom?" A completely clueless Marissa had seen her mother talking to two people from afar. She had moved over to see what was going on. But what she was about to see would more than astonish her.
Summer was already coming up with something quick and witty in her head to say to Julie, but her thoughts were interrupted when she heard her best friend's voice. She quickly turned around to face her. And even though she could barely contain all the anger she held inside for Julie, she still managed to offer her a smile.
"Summer?" Marissa asked, as if she didn't believe it was really her. She didn't know what to do, was she dreaming again? She stood there, stuck in her spot, trying to take it all in.
Summer removed her sunglasses, revealing a set of big brown, watery eyes. "Hey Coop."