A/N: Thanks again for the reviews, I really appreciate it :D Just a caveat, this chapter has a lot to do with Camerons past, but don't worry, it help's show Reid's development...hopefully!

Disclaimer: I don't own Criminal Minds, CBS does! I do own Cameron and surrounding characters.

"Cameron?" Reid woke in the middle of the night, "are you awake?"

"Uh huh."

He cleared his throat, "I… I want to ask you a question."

She rolled over and peered at him through the darkness, "Sure."

"I was just wondering, uh, why aren't you sleeping? Not right now, I mean, in general. Because you know that you don't have to stay up with me. And even if you wanted to, you can't just will yourself to be awake all the time."

Cameron rolled her eyes, "I'm not awake all the time."

"You're awake as much as I am, and that's a lot of the time. I just want to know." He flicked on the lamp beside him.

"There's nothing to know. Go to sleep." She reached across him and flicked the light off.

He sighed and waited a second, "You know you don't have to tell me."

Cameron shifted around and wiggled her feet, she flicked the light back on. "I don't want to go to sleep because I have dreams."

He frowned, "You have nightmares too?"

She bit her lip, "Not nightmares, they're more like memories, wading into my subconcious."

He squinted at her, "I don't understand—"

"I don't feel right, dumping all my problems on you. Your still si—" Cameron started softly.

"I'm not sick." He abruptly cut her off. "Besides, after everything you've done for me, it's my turn. You might feel better if you talk about it." He looked at her with earnest eyes, "Please?"

She felt herself start to give in, "When I moved to L.A. I fell in love with one of my friends from high school, he'd moved to L.A. years ago to become a musician and when I moved out there, he was the only one I knew and one thing led to another… Anyways, I was counseling at a rehab facility, meanwhile—I had no idea, or maybe I did. I don't know— I had a musician boyfriend who was a heavy drug user: heroine, cocaine, acid, speed. Whatever." She stopped for a second and took uneasy breath.

"He was the first person I couldn't help; he wouldn't stop, not even for me."

"Are you okay?" He asked, severe concern manifesting in his eyes.

"One morning, after months of begging him to stop, I found out that I was pregnant. I knew I had to stop being weak and left L.A. the next day, moved back to New York. My doctor friend helped me get a job counseling at his hospital. I was prepared to raise my baby alone."

Reid's eyes were wide, he tilted his head, "You're a mother?"

Against her will, several tears fell out of Cameron's eyes, she shook her head, "I wasn't on my own for too long. Liam found out through a mutual friend why I left, and he quit using that day. He showed up on my step, seven months clean. I was so bloody proud of him. He stayed with me for six months, until he had to go on tour with his band."

Silence loomed over them, Reid was itching for her to continue, but she was dreading it. Cameron grabbed a book off the nightstand and pulled out a photograph from the back of it, she handed it to him with shaky hands. He stared at it, it was Cameron dressed up like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz, she was hugging a little boy of about three who was dressed like a lion.

Cameron blinked rapidly and looked away, "That's my son, Connor Christensen. He was born on December 17th. We took this picture on Halloween, he was so excited to go Trick-or-treating and wanted me to do it too, so we both dressed up. It was one of our favorite movies."

Reid moved over so he faced Cameron head on as she sat cross-legged on the bed. She didn't know how to continue, she didn't think that she could. Reid surprised himself by taking her hand and squeezing it, like she'd done many times for him. "It's okay, you don't have to talk anymore if you don't want to."

Cameron looked into his eyes, "I do. I need to do this." Please, please let me be able to do this.

"It was right in the middle of flu season and the hospital was packed with sick kids and not enough staff. So when Connor caught a bad flu I took him to the clinic and was told to take him home and give him some chicken soup, plenty of fluids and baby aspirin, which I did. After about two more weeks he was still sick, only he was a lot worse. He couldn't catch his breath, I had to prop him up when he slept. I hadn't been to work the whole time he was sick and one night I just knew something was wrong and I rushed him to the hospital.

She rubbed her face as she begun to feel dizzy, "As soon as we got there my friend, Dr. Norton, started running all these tests. I just remember being asked to wait outside his room. I was just sitting there, and Dr. Norton, Adam, sat down beside me and told me that my three year old son was in severe congestive heart failure. Myocardirtis it's called, some stupid infection in his heart that no one noticed. Everything went hazy I just heard him say that unless some miracle heart became available, there wasn't anything they could do for him."

Tear were streaming down Cameron's face at this point as she gasped little breaths of air to continue. "Connor stayed in the hospital, it was like his second home I guess. He was so brave though, he just kept asking if he could have a puppy in heaven; he was allergic to them. I told him that he could have all the puppies he wanted. You have no idea how hard it is to tell a three year old he's dying." She didn't want to recall the incredible memories of her son, "I was lucky, you know? I got to hug him and give him a kiss, Liam never made it back in time to say goodbye. He never got to hear Connor say how much he was going to miss his mommy and daddy."

Reid's eyes started to water, he cleared his throat, "How, ah... how long ago?"

"Three weeks ago."

Reid tried not to look shocked, he couldn't believe what he had just learned. This poor girl was such a strong person for him to lean on and all this time...

Cameron put he head in her hands and sobbed, she shook her head, "It isn't fair. He was still just a baby—" She started choking and coughing. Reid got up and sat beside her, pulling her into his arms, holding her tight while she cried into his chest. He patted her back as she continued gasping and crying. "Shhh, it's alright to be hurt. It's okay." He whispered in her ear. He finally figured out why she had the Ativan, her doctor probably prescribed it to calm her down and help her sleep, not that she bothered to take it anyway.

He never knew he was capable of this level of compassion, and as she cried herself to sleep in his arms he realized that, though it would be slow going, it was possible for them both to heal.

Hope you all liked it. As always I'd love any feedback! :D