Disclaimer: I do not own the X-men, G.I.Joe, or Star Trek. Red Witch came up with the unique idea of the Misfits

General Hawk sighed and rubbed his head as he stared at the safe where they'd hidden one of Trinity's more adventurous devices.

"Any idea where they went to this time?"

Cover Girl shook her head. "No idea. But Low Light's with them."

"Maybe he'll keep them in line?"

"You're kidding right?" Beach Head asked as he held an ice pack to his head. "We had a hard enough time last week talking him out of using his gas form to pull a Ghost of Christmas story on Senator Kelly."

"Wasn't that Pietro's idea?"

(insert Divider Line)

"This looks familiar." Low Light said as he looked around. "I know it does…."

"I thought we were going to visit Buffy?" Shipwreck spoke up.

"See ya! Off to explore!"

"Pietro!" Everyone yelled and tried to chase him. With the exception of Low Light and Shipwreck who were still confused.

From all over the ship, Kirk heard various statements from the intercom.

"Security to deck 2."

"Maintenance to decks 3, 4, and 5"

"Is that pudding leaking out of that door? Who put it in the Captain's living quarters?"

"Scotty is dancing with a reptiloid creature in a green dress and some kind of tie."

"There's what in the engine room?"

A loud smack came across the speakers.

"Report Bones."

"It's ok now Jim. The weird person in an ancient sailor's outfit just got slapped into the bulkhead by one of the nurses."

There was silence.

"Oh wait, he got up. Now she's got him in a chokehold. I wonder if I should tranquilize him…"

Kirk blinked. "Don't you mean her?"

"Are you nuts? Oh wait, he's running now." A pause. "I think he managed to make two other females angry. They're firing phasers and I don't think the stun setting is on."

Screaming was heard in the background.

"I don't think they learned how to shoot either… one of our maintenance staff might not be fathering children"

"Security to the hanger bay. Some green person is hopping around the ceiling with a human female. They somehow got the music to play some kind of nightmarish music."

"Help Help! Triplets are overrunning my position!"

"AHHHHHH!! I thought Vulcans didn't streak? What is that horrible smell?"

A mumble was heard in the background.

"COFFEE?? IT DID THAT TO SPOCK?"

BOOM "Ok, how did the mashed potatoes explode?"

"Security, this is maintenance. Some weird teenager is strangling one of Nurse Chapel's uniforms. He keeps calling it a stupid coyote. He just set fire to it."

Thirty seconds later. "Doctor McCoy to Nurse Chapel's room. She just knocked him out."

"What the . is that? Some guy just appeared out of smoke and is now in a brawl with Chekov!"

"Help Help! The silverware is attacking! I think the teenager in red did it! She's scaring me Mommy, I want to go home."

"Captain, we just restrained one of our new recruits… he refuses to let go of the computer monitor and keeps calling it Mommy."

"Fire teams to deck 10. Either that or chew toys… Does anyone know how to calm down a Fire Dragon named Mr. Flickers? The kid says it needs some play time."

"All hands, this is Kirk speaking. Whoever caused a tornado on the bridge and drew nude pictures on several walls, please clean up the pictures. We can handle the rest of the mess."

(insert Divider Line)

Kirk blinked. "I don't know which is worse… the fact that I wish this had been one of our normal encounters, or the fact that Bones and Scotty got drunk and slept with all of our nurses."

Althea groaned. "That's my dad. He has a talent."

"Well take him and it somewhere else. We need some peace and quiet again, like an alien entity killing off my crew. Anything has to better."

Everyone nodded and waved.

As Trinity started to set the watches, Kirk yelled. "AND TAKE THE COFFEE WITH YOU!"