Love and War
Written by: Lexon135 aka Avcthedm on other websites
Authors note: Hey guys. You know the drill, I don't own most of the characters but the ones I make up feel free to use. I'm not really jealous. Just don't copy this and not give me credit. Like every person I love reviews.
There was absolutely nothing going on for Princess Peach. Nada, Zip, Zilch. Months had gone by since the ceasefire between the Mushroom Kingdom and the Kingdom of the Darklands. Why then was the economy in a horrible position; Why was everyone unhappy? It seemed like every single day more complaints were sent to the palace by merchants going out of business because their products were no longer needed. Peach sifted through one from a manufacturer of POW blocks and glanced over another from a farmer who cultivated fire flowers. She felt horrible because the empathy she used to feel for every citizen of her kingdom seemed to have diminished. She desperately wanted to ironically want to help her kingdom but she couldn't. Something was missing
The king of Koopas stood upon his balcony alone. Being king had been less and less what he had expected. When he took the job he had a vision of an empire with him at the top of its pyramid. He had stood upon this same balcony on his floating castle and seen this empire the night he became king. Now he saw nothing but a vast and foreign land.
"Lord Bowser" came a voice from behind. "We are still awaiting your answer". The voice belonged to a timid magikoopa.
"You'll have it," said Bowser. There was a certain fatigue in the king's voice, which allowed for the majikoopa to maintain his calm. The magikoopa had expected a Bowser who was an unforgiving tyrant, a fiend among fiends. What stood before the magikoopa now definitely had the figure and the potential but lacked a certain aura.
"We only have a month to respond your most horridness and the sooner the…"
"I said LEAVE ME ALONE!" yelled Bowser. His arms were tensed and he looked to kill. A much different being stood before the majikoopa. A being poles apart from the disheartened shell of a koopa.
"Yessir" said the majikoopa quickly vanishing.
Once again the balcony was quiet, peaceful, and somber.
" Well as I am sure you are all aware the economy has officially entered a depression," said Tight T. Toad through his mustache. "We are expecting a further decline in the economy unless some new legislature is introduced. With that being said let this congregation of the senate begin"
A rather large toad stood up with some difficulty. He smiled as he looked at his colleagues. " Permission to address the senate?" requested the toad.
"Permission granted," said Tight T. Toad "You may begin Mr. Lock N. Toad"
"I begin by asking you all how the mushroom kingdom has become the most prosperous nation and remained so until this day. Does anyone know?" The senate was quiet. "Well I'm sure you all know, nobody wants to say it though. I will say it, however, we have remained prosperous due to war". All the senators began to shuffle uncomfortably in their seats and whisper amongst themselves.
Finally one of the younger toads spoke up "What are you suggesting then? That we start a war!?"
"Well I won't sugar coat it. Basically yes that is what I'm suggesting"
One of the older toads took their turn to speak "Isn't it also true that the majority of your money creating weapons such as the bomber bill 3000?"
"May I remind you that our duty is to serve the mushroom kingdom. We must act in its best interest. My personal gain is not even a factor"
"Sure…" muttered one of the toads. It was know that Lock N. Toad was a tycoon in every aspect of his life. His goal was to win with the largest prize and if that meant a beneficial relationship more the better but if it meant making enemies so be it. The prize justified all the means.
Tight T. Toad banged his gavel " Lock N. Toad you forget your place. We of the mushroom kingdom pride ourselves in never having instigated a war. We will search for an alternative"
"Your honor, with all due respect, who said we would instigate the war?"
"What are we going to do? Ask for a war" laughed Tight T. Toad. The rest of the senators joined in.
"What if I said yes?"
" House of Representatives come to order," said Krank E. Koopa clearly upset, not that this was anything out of ordinary. Today his anger came from the fact that their king's seat was empty. Lord Bowser had made it a habit to not show from time to time but today of all days was unacceptable. "As you all should know by now we have the SAME matter of the purchase of the select region of the Darklands. Wart demands an answer by the end of the month. Of course our past two votes to approve this sale mean absolutely nothing without his royal pain's signature. The only way we are going to do anything is if we get 80 of the house to go around his authority. With our current house of 200 I find it very annoying that we can only get 62. Come on people we all know it's inevitable. Lets get this show moving so we can start talking about REAL issues like retirement plans"
"Sir" spoke up a young magikoopa "Aren't you supposed to be nonpartial in your speech"
"And who are you?" asked Krank E. in a false tone of endearment
"I'm Kerry Koopa sir, an intern"
"You're an intern… THEN SHUT UP AND GET ME SOME COFFEE!!" yelled the angry koopa. Kerry needed no further encouragement as he ran out of the chamber faster than a pokey being chase by a Yoshi. "Young whippersnappers and their ideas… I swear the next generation is gonna be the death of us all…"
The court began to chatter as they usually did when not under supervision of Lord Bowser. It was enough to drive a koopa insane! "Alright stop your chatterboxes and lets vote again! All in favor raise your hand". The remaining interns quickly took a tally.
"Sir of the 200, 137 have voted in favor of selling the select portion of the Darklands bringing the approval rating to 68.5"
"Alright so we have 69, that's a little better but still…"
"It doesn't round sir" chimed in the Koopa
"What doesn't round?" asked Krank E.
"The percent sir"
"DON'T YOU TELL ME WHAT DOES OR WHAT DOESN'T ROUND! I'VE RUN THIS SHOW SINCE BEFORE YOU WERE BORN! NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT!" The koopa fled just as fleetly as his predecessor. "Now I suppose we will just have to move on… Next topic "recruiting new interns…""
"You CANNOT be serious!" yelled Tie D. Toad "You will get yourself thrown in Bowser's dungeon"
"Tie D., Tie D. risks are necessary for any success. I know the risk I have to take and I'm taking it. I'm sure a butler like you couldn't understand"
"Yes sir" said the toad. He was a little disheartened by his master's rebuttal but could not help but hope for his safe return. Sure, Lock N. Toad had always been mean to him and treated him like dirt but he knew the other side to him. He had paid off his debts when his piranha plant gardening business flopped and given him shelter, food, and pay. "Be safe"
Here it was, Bowser's Castle. It hovered in the sky like a portentous cloud serving as a harbinger for some of the darkest and most foul crimes in all of the world. He wasn't quite sure how to get up there so he sat and waited on the ground below. Suddenly a beam of bright light focused on the toad; forcing him to shield his eyes with his hands. Before he was any the wiser a large humming noise was coming from above his head. He looked up to see a clown copter hovering. "Who goes there?" asked a voice.
"My name is Lock N. Toad and I have come here to make a proposal to Bowser"
"To Bowser?" the voice broke out laughing "and what makes you think that the lord of the Darklands will listen to someone as insignificant as you?"
"I represent the Mushroom Kingdom senate and we wish to make a proposal to his um… evilness"
The guard was a little baffled by this. He wasn't quite sure what to do. If he sent the toad away he might have angered the Mushroom Kingdom and the blame would fall on him. On the other hand if he took him into the castle and he sabotaged it then it would also be his fault when the castle blew up. He pondered for a moment. He had it! He would take him to his superior and make him decide what to do. It was genius! "come with me"…
Finally Lock N. Toad made it through to someone intelligent. "So Mr. Krank E. Koopa are we agreed?"
"Yes but have you thought of a means to bring the whole nation to war, It is no simple task to simply initiate war"
"It's a lot simpler than you think my good man. All we have to do is fool two people.
"Bowser" said Krank E. Koopa
"Peach" said Lock N. Toad.
"Your most awful, wretched, horridness" said Krank E. Koopa in his most flattering tone.
"Yes" said a clearly bored king of koopas. " I'll come sign the bill now if that's what you are here for"
"I actually have some good news for you sire. The house has decided to nullify the bill that took the power to declare war away from you!"
"Whoopdee freakin doo" said Bowser no more interested. "What is the point of being a king if you are miserable?"
"Lets forget about that for now," said Krank E. Koopa "Don't you want to go start a war. I know! Lets attack the mushroom kingdom!"
"Why bother! All that's going to happen is after a few days of plundering and pillaging MARIO is going to come and SAVE THE DAY! Nothing I do can stop it! And worst of all I must feel the separation between me and my love!"
"Wow he is such a mental case" thought Krank E. Koopa. Fortunately he had though of this. "Actually, your rotteness, I have a letter from a certain princess."
"Give it to me!" demanded Bowser. He smelled the letter over. "Hmm that's weird. Peach always puts perfume on her letters". Krank E. stared at him strangely "I mean… so I've heard." Feeling no need to better explain himself Bowser ripped open the letter, careful though to protect It's contents.
The Letter Read
Dear Bowser,
Though I hate to admit it I am in need of your help. It seems both our Kingdoms are in dire need of an economic stimulus. I believe war is the best stimulus possible. In order to start the war, however, I will need you to kidnap me…
I'll be waiting
3 Peach 3
"That doesn't sound much like Peach…" said Bowser. Krank E. was praying he was not discovered. He thought he had done well to hire a calligraphist to forge her handwriting. "I guess she's read some economics books" said Bowser. Krank E. let out a sigh of relief.
"So will you kidnap her" asked Krank E. Koopa
Bowser laughed. He was once again himself. "Of course I will!" he exclaimed "You can't leave a lady waiting!"
Lock N. Toad felt like he got the harder part of the bargain. He had to convince Peach to stand at a certain place at a certain time, oh and lets not forget; he had to convince her to let Bowser kidnap her.
"There is absolutely no way I'll do it!" exclaimed Peach " I wouldn't go with Bowser willingly for a million coins!"
Suddenly Lock N. Toad was inspired. He knew just what to say. "But Princess don't you see. It is for millions of coins to be distributed amongst the people. Princess, the people seek financial relief. Every day more and more houses are being forclosed on. Entire zones are being vacated! Peach, this is a relief that only you can give the people. Besides, it has all been arranged so that you are guaranteed a safe return once all the fighting is over"
Peach was obviously phased by this. He had used her empathy against her and was quite smug of the fact though he wouldn't dare show it on his face. "what about the war though?"
"Princess, nobody ever dies from these things. Sure a few toads get turned into animals and a few koopas get their heads stepped on; but all in all nobody is worse for the wear"
Peach wasn't sure what to do. She wanted to feel alive again. She wanted the thrilling hope she got every time Mario came to save her. And on top she would be helping her people in the long run, right? I mean the worst injury she had heard of was some 3rd degree burns from falling in lava but it was nothing beyond repair. She made her decision, "O.K. I'll do it".
Authors ending note:
Sorry there was no fluff yet but I have to establish the story. I hope you liked reading it as much as I liked writing it though. Next chapter is REALLY fun. Review