Baile87chica - I wish this could happen on the show too, unfortunately the writers aren't that kind to us.

LanieCroft - Thank you so much for all of your compliments. I hope you continue to enjoy it.

Suz - Lol yeah you would whisk Kate away and why not take Justin as well, both of them together would definitely be good ;) Is your dirty mind working in over drive right now? Hehe mine definitely is. Thanks for your awesome review, i look forward to reading them so much because your opinion is so important to me.

Claire - You're welcome. I am happy you like it, let me know what you think of this :)

Emily - I am glad i can brighten your day even just a little bit. Read this and then go back to denial land where everything is wonderful lol.

ingridmill - Thank you, i am really glad you think so it means a lot.

McAddex - Yeah don't worry i am in denial about the last episode, in this fic they will get the ending they deserve.

Carolina1986 - Thanks for the review, i'm glad you like the fic so far.

A/N – I am sorry it has taken me so long to update, I had every intention to update earlier but then real life got in the way. I hope this is worth the wait.

As always thanks to Suz for the wonderful work beta reading. You don't know how much I appreciate all of your support.

I'm not asking for much
But I need a little time

To find what it is I want
And is it you this time

Standing On The Edge, Michelle Branch

Chapter 3 - Standing On The Edge

A week had passed since Alex had said he would give her time to think and still Addison was unable to decide what to do. Every time she thought she had reached a decision the doubts came crawling back in to her mind, ultimately she managed to talk herself out of it and she ended up right back where she started.

She walked the familiar path through the hospital up to her office and bolted the door behind her. God, why couldn't she just make a decision? She was back to doing anything she could to avoid Alex, despite the fact that she knew it was immature and childish. She took the stairs even if that meant she had to walk 10 stages and was exhausted by the time she reached the destined floor. She sat down at her desk with a sigh and pulled her lunch out from the draw.

She couldn't help but laugh at herself. How pathetic had she become that she was back to bringing lunch to work in a bag and eating alone in her office? Her thoughts returned to Alex as they seemed to so often these days. She had seen little of him the past week, he had tried to talk to her a few times but she had practically ran away from him every time he tried.

It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to him; it was simply that she didn't know what to say. She was confused, looking back over the past few weeks she realised their relationship had been a roller coaster ride filled with proposals and rejections. She allowed her thoughts to slip in to the cycle they performed so often, her mind analyzing the situation but never reaching a decision.

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Alex wandered the halls of the hospital glancing around for any sign of Addison. He didn't have much hope of finding her as he had come to realise that she was a master at the game of avoidance. He should be getting used to it; after all it wasn't the first time. The nurses paged him with work, Addison saw him in surgery but disappeared immediately after so there was no chance to talk and that was the only time he saw her.

To him it seemed clear that she had already made her decision and she just couldn't find a way to tell him. So she opted for the simpler choice of avoiding him completely. Alex had considered taking drastic action as he had the last time to get her to talk to him. Maybe another loud declaration shouted in a crowded hallway, or possibly drag her in to another supply closet.

He had considered his options carefully. Either he could tell her the truth about how he felt about her, and leave himself open to the hurt and humiliation of rejection. Alternatively he could dismiss his feelings and pretend nothing had changed and that nothing had ever happened between them. Neither option was appealing.

He was shaken from his thoughts when his pager beeped loudly and he reached down to flip it open. He set off at a jog for the ER when he read the emergency call from one of the nurses.

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Addison reached the ER in record time to find Alex already working on the baby which had just been rushed in. She felt a moment of pride as she watched him take charge of the situation. She rushed over and assessed the baby; it was immediately obvious that surgery was necessary although she didn't know if there was much hope.

She booked the OR and scrubbed in quickly. The room was tense as Alex scrubbed in beside her; however he seemed to understand that this wasn't the time to talk about personal issues. In some ways the silence was worse.

It was a long surgery and Addison did everything she could but the damage was too extensive in the end. When the monitor flat lined she tore off her gloves and apron and left the room quickly. Alex considered following her but he thought maybe she wanted some space first. Instead he called time of death and then scrubbed out slowly.

Addison hurried in to her office and shut the door, leaning against it while the tears streamed down her cheeks. A sob wracked her body and she gasped for breath. She stumbled over to the couch by the window and sank down in to it. She had being doing this job for a long time and in a way she was used to losing patients, although it never got any easier.

Today had been worse than normal. It was the look that Alex had given her when the monitor flat lined. It had been fleeting but she had noticed it, he had looked disappointed as though she had failed him. He had looked to her to save the baby and she had let him down, that thought alone was enough to make her cry even harder.

The door opened softly and Mark peered around the edge.

"Addie…what happened?" He walked over to the couch and sat down beside her. Addison could only sob harder in response to his question. He wrapped an arm around her and she rested her head against his shoulder. He rubbed soothing circles on her back while she cried until she had no more tears left.

The thought that she didn't want Mark to be the one comforting her entered her mind but still she accepted his offer and sank right into his open arms. She wasn't prepared to fight it any longer, she realised that she had made her decision days ago she just hadn't been ready to accept it then. In that moment all she wanted was Alex to put his arms around her, to comfort her and hold her as she cried.

Alex left the OR and went in search of Addison. He had noticed her eyes fill up with tears when she had lost the baby and he had to resist the urge to reach out and comfort her. He checked the lounge and locker room but she wasn't there. It crossed his mind that she would want somewhere more private so he walked up to her office.

As he approached the door he heard a sniffling noise coming from inside. He knocked gently on the door then pushed it open. The first thing he saw was Mark with his arms around Addison and she was leaning in to his embrace. Alex felt his stomach clench in anger and disappointment, he had suspected all week that she had chosen Mark but that didn't make the pain any less.

Addison's head whipped around when the door opened and Alex saw she had been crying. She stared at him in shock, neither of them making a move. Mark's voice broke them out of their daze.

"Karev," He spat out. "Did anyone say you could come in?"

Alex looked to Addison hoping that she would explain that he didn't need permission to enter her office. It seemed she was either incapable or unwilling to help though as she just continued staring at him. Her mind was working frantically trying to keep up, what did Alex think they had been doing? He gazed at her the disappointment clear on his face. It seemed she had made her choice and in his opinion she had chosen wrong.

"It won't ever happen again," Alex replied evenly. To an outsider it would have appeared he was answering Mark's question, but the comment was directed at Addison and he knew she understood by the widening of her eyes. She felt tears welling up again when she realised what he was saying. Before she could react he had stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

"Jesus, who does he think he is? What a moron!" Mark said angrily.

Something inside of Addison snapped when she heard Mark insult Alex and she stood up suddenly.

"Who do you think you are? You don't even know Alex so you have no right to insult him. He's ten times the man you'll ever be!" Addison hissed. She strode over to the door and yanked it open. "Get out!"

Mark looked angry and somewhat confused as he stood up. Comprehension dawned eventually and he scowled even harder.

"You have got t be kidding me. You and Karev…are you insane? Is this your way of getting back at Derek? He has his own intern so you have to have yours." Mark shook his head in apparent disgust.

"This has nothing to do with Derek, or you for that matter. It's none of your goddamn business what I do. Now you heard me the first time, get out!"

Mark walked over to her and stared at her angrily. She could see the fury in his eyes but there was something else there too which she couldn't quite place. He raised his hands to her shoulders but she flinched at the contact and moved away. With one last sad look in her direction he left the room.

Addison watched as the door closed for the final time. What the hell had just happened? She had just gone from having two men to having none in the space of ten minutes. She sighed as she felt the tears start to fall once more.

So please don't hate me. Or at least don't hate me yet, when the story is finished if you still want to throw things at me feel free to do so. But i'm not done yet so be patient with me, in the mean time express your frustation by leaving a review...pretty please :)