A/N I am posting Chapter 2, since I want to, but some revieiws would be nice. Thanks!
Chapter 2
As the wedding grows closer, I am starting to worry. What if I trip while walking down the aisle? What if my train gets caught somewhere along the way? What if my stupid high heel, which Alice is forcing me to wear, breaks? As I am thinking about all this, I notice Edward looking at me with a frustrated expression.
"What's wrong Edward?" I am starting to get nervous, he just looks at me with more concentration. Do I have spinach in my teeth or something? "Edward, what is it?"
"I am trying very hard right now to read your mind, so if you wouldn't break my concentration by looking extremely adorable when you're thinking, that would be great" He says with sarcasm very heavily in his voice.
"What that it? I thought you had given up trying to read my mind a while ago?"
"I mind reading vampire never gives up, love" He said cocking an eyebrow at me, then all of a sudden his face takes a more serious tone. "I am just wondering if this wedding is the best idea…" His eyes were watching me for any flicker of emotion that came out. Unfortunately, a lot of emotion came out. I was so confused, was he going to leave me again. I don't think I would be able to live, but now that I realized my love for Jacob, maybe it wouldn't be as bad if he left me. Not as bad, but still horrible.
"W-w-what? W-why would you s-say that?" I couldn't keep them in, tears started rolling down my cheeks. He said he wasn't going to leave me again, how could he do this?
"No, love no. I meant I saw you the day you said bye to Jacob. I heard your tears that night. If it caused you that much pain to leave Jacob, then maybe you should be with him. I don't want you marrying me because you think you have to, to make up for all the times I have saved you, or anything of that sort. And, to tell you the truth, you don't seem that enthusiastic about the wedding. Actually, I am guessing that, the wedding is what you were thinking about just now" He said all this while I sat in his lap and he was stroking my hair.
I sighed a breath of relief. He wasn't leaving me, he just thought that I should be a cheerier bride. The tears stopped immediately. "Edward…" Urgh, I was going to have to bring up my personally dark ages, I didn't really want to discuss them with Edward, since he still blames himself. "…The night I told Jacob goodbye, I cried, I will admit it. And I still regret you having to see that. But you didn't see me when it was you that left. I didn't stop crying for weeks, and once I did, I refused any emotion to pump in my veins. The only time I felt anything was when I slept, and the horror of you leaving me would replay in my mind over and over again…" I noticed that he was now rocking me in his lap and hugging me closer to his body.
"If what you went through when I left is worse than what I saw you go through the night you left Jacob, if the pain" His voice broke "was really that horrendous, I will never forgive myself, never. Even if we live forever together, I will always know that I caused you so, so much hurt."
"Edward. As long as you promise you never put me through the pain I felt when I found out you were going to Italy, I swear I will be with you forever, because I choose to. Not because I think I have to, because I want to. I cant live without you. You are my soul, my reason for living, and I would rather go to the deepest pits of hell than live without you ever again" I was hyperventilating by the end of my speech. Since I knew that my words now, would seal the amazing future with Edward ahead.
"You are to good to me" That is all that he could say, for I knew that if he could cry, he would be crying now.
I didn't know what else to do so I quickly had my human moment and climbed into bed. Edward was laying on top of the sheets of course. He started humming my lullaby knowing it would make me sleepy, but I didn't want to sleep just yet. So I got up out of my covers and lay down on top of him. As we started kissing, I remembered his coal black eyes. I stopped suddenly, and looked into his eyes. They were ravenous. I didn't know what to do, so as I climbed off him, he turned around. Now I was under his weight.
"Edward, what are you doing?" My voice was cracking "Edward are you ok? Edward you are crushing me. Get off!" My feeble attempts weren't working, I didn't think they would. He lay on top of me like that for five minutes. His onyx eyes keep looking at me, like he was going to attack. For the first time in a long time I was scared of Edward. I heard something come in through my window. The next thing I know Emmet was prying Edward off me, I could hear them talking and then leaving though the window. The next thing I realized that Alice was talking to me
"Bella, Bella are you ok. Are you hurt. Bella are you listening to me. It ok. It is going to be ok. Bella, are you listening to me?" Alice was frantic, but I couldn't manage enough of a voice to comfort her
"I'm...fine" I managed to say
"OH BELLA, that is so good, I saw what Edward…So I had to make sure you were ok" She started babbling, and I stopped paying attention. What would have Edward done if alice hadn't shown up. Would I have been in pain now. I needed to talk to him. Now.
A/N Yeah I know kinda a cliffy, but you will live. Ok if you have actually read the story and like it…in ur review write cucumbers and if you didn't like the story write….pears…ok thanks? Go cucumbers!!