Ok, so I was stuck in a van with the Janitor and Dr Cox, going on a three day drive to Austin to get my stuffed dog back. This should be interesting. Dr Cox was snoring loudly in the back, having fallen asleep due to his hangover. The Janitor was keeping his eye on the road, and I was anxious for my well-being, stuck in a small white van with my worst enemy. The clock on the dashboard said 11:21 pm.
Suddenly, I heard a small sound in my pocket, my cellphone. I picked it up, and flicked it open.
"Hello?"
"JD, where the hell are you?" came Carla's voice down the line. Oh crap, here we go. Carla from the block has gone technological!
"I'm…" I began. The Janitor tapped a map on the ceiling with his finger.
"Well, let's just say I'll be at Phoenix in a few hours!"
"I mean, where are you as in, where are you? What are you doing?"
"Ohh! Well, I'm with the Janitor…"
"You're what?"
"I'm with the Janitor and we're going to Austin to get Rowdy back from that guy!"
"Oh, god, JD…!"
"Don't be so worried! Dr Cox is here too…"
"What the hell? What's Perry doing there?"
Hmm…maybe it wouldn't be a good idea to tell her that the Janitor was planning on dumping him in the middle of nowhere.
"He's just…anyway, I'm fine! Don't worry about me!"
"Bambi, you are so…"
"Yeah, love you too Carla, bye!"
I quickly hung up, and sighed. There was a shift in the back seat. Dr Cox seemed to have woken up again.
"You awake, Angry Doctor?" called the Janitor.
"What the hell's going on, Jumpsuit?" my mentor called back. "Where am I?"
"The back of the van"
"What…where are we going? And why is Lucy here?"
"Who's Lucy?"
"That'd be me…" I muttered. Stupid Dr Cox…
"Well, in answer to your question, we're going down to Austin!" said the Janitor.
"Austin? Lurch, that's three days away!"
"I know…"
"For God's sake, let me outta this van!"
"Sorry, Angry Doctor, but no can do. You see, we're on the middle of the highway"
"I'll hitchhike back!"
"Dr Cox, there's no one around for miles; it's 11:30 pm. And I'd like to see you reduced to hitchhiking!" I said.
"I swear, Mariah, the second we're out of this van, your girly ass is gonna wish it had never been born!" Dr Cox threatened. Eep!
"Hey! Don't you threaten Scooter! That's my job!"
Phew, protection…thanks you, Janitor!
After another hour of driving and Dr Cox grumbling, we stopped at a service station. The Janitor parked the van, and we got out to get food.
Dr Cox stalked off.
"Hey, Angry Doctor! Where you going?"
"Phone booth! Unlike you ladies, I have an ex-wife and a child I need to see!"
"I was afraid of that…" the Janitor smirked. I wondered what he was talking about, until Dr Cox came back to us, looking angrier than ever.
"Give me back my loose change, Jumpsuit!"
"Hmm…Janitor says no!" muttered Janitor. Boy, was this gonna be awkward!
"Lurch, I am going to…"
"Bububu!" the Janitor interrupted. "Just to warn you I have 20 kinds of nasty cleaning acids in the back so you can be a good little Angry Doctor and get on with it or you can loose an ear!"
The Janitor was threatening someone other than me? Ok, serious confusion!
My mentor and my enemy glared at each other. I wanted to say something along the lines of "Austin. Van. Three days. Can't we just all get along?" without sounding like a girl. Although I'd been called it plenty of times before.
"Ok, well I've got kidnap, robbery, threat and assault on the list of things you've done to me tonight, Jumpsuit, so if you and Nicola here want to go down to Austin for your lovely little date, fine by me, but don't pull me into it because I swear to God I'll make your life hell if you do!"
"Hey, guys…" I began. They turned at me and glared. "Can we get the burgers and go because I would kinda like to get to Austin…"
"Why, Janice, does your boyfriend live there? Be a good little girl and get those cheap crap they call McDonalds since I threw up all my lunch before Lurch here knocked me out. And get me a scotch too!"
I sighed and shook my head. Those two could really be a pain in the ass sometimes. Well, always. But hey, Austin was Austin.
Only two days, 53 hours to go…