Carving Out a Future

By: Dreamfall

Summary: Her crew doesn't know that Serenity's new passenger, a carpenter with an 'unusual upbringing', is a relic from the past. Xander says he's not looking for trouble. But, then, neither are they. Not usually, leastways. It just always comes calling anyway. Gen. Canon couples mentioned, but definitely not the focus of the story.

Written for: NaNoWriMo and TTH100: Xander/Firefly

TTH100 prompt: 027-Fear

Rating: FR13/PG13/T

Disclaimer: I own neither Firefly nor BtVS.

Spoilers: Takes place post Season 7 for Buffy, and post-Objects in Space (and post the comic books, for that matter), but pre-Serenity for Firefly.

Author's Note: This is the story I started in November for NaNoWriMo. I'm thirty or so chapters into it, but since there's going to be at least one hundred chapters (since it's for tth100), they're mostly pretty short. If you're coming from this from my HP fanfics-- it's very different. Way less dark. It's also an incredibly fun story to write, and I do intend to continue with it to its conclusion. And no, it's not taking any real time away from Cat, now that I'm not working obsessively on it, like I was in November. I'll be posting every couple/few days at least till I'm caught up with my livejournal (username dreamfall(underscore)nnwm). Hope you enjoy!

Review Response: Responses to any reviews will be posted in the same livejournal as my other review responses-- username dreamfall(underscore)ff.

Chapter Five
Familiar Stranger

Two days later, sounds of movement drew Simon's attention from the terminal he was working at, and he moved quickly over to the bed as he saw the man shifting. Wary eyes opened, one dark brown and the other so light it was almost yellow. They shifted around the room and finally landed on Simon. The man tried to speak, but no sound came out.

"You're awake! I was beginning to worry. Here, let me get you some water," Simon said, suiting word to deed as he filled a tall glass and held it to the man's lips.

Xander turned his head weakly away and rubbed the moisture off his mouth with the back of his hand. "You Initiative?" he asked, managing to force the words out even without accepting the drink.

Simon's brow furrowed in confusion. "Initiative? I'm sorry, I'm not familiar with..." he trailed off. "I'm Simon. Ship's doctor for Serenity, a trade ship. You got shot helping our engineer, and she brought you back here for healing.

Mismatched eyes drifted closed, and a long sigh escaped the man. "Right. I remember. 2517." Without reopening his eyes, he reached out with one surprisingly steady hand, took the glass from Simon, and drained it. Finally, he opened his eyes again, expression shielded.

"Well," Simon said. "I should probably tell Mal you woke up."

"Mal?"

"The captain."

"Bad," Xander murmured thoughtfully.

"In Latin," River agreed.

Simon looked over sharply to where she was perched on the counter, arms hugging her knees, big eyes locked on his patient. "I didn't see you come in," he said, trying to keep the panic from his tone. "You're not supposed to be in here."

"The Sleeper awoke," she stated.

Xander's gaze sharpened on her, then his eyes widened slightly in surprise for a moment before he got them back under control. Simon just offered her an attempt at a smile. "That's right, mei-mei, after two days, now he's awake."

"It was longer," she disagreed. "Longer and colder and darker and far, far lonelier."

Eyes locked on his sister, Simon didn't catch Xander's shiver or the haunted look that passed through his eyes. "Just two days, mei-mei. Kaylee brought him in just before we left Persephone. Now, since he woke up, why don't you go get the captain."

She smiled, jumped down from the counter, and started for the door. Then she paused and turned back to Xander. "Don't worry. He's closer than you think," she said, then cast him an innocent smile, turned, and skipped away, arms swinging.

Xander stared after her, confused. "He? Who?" he asked, turning to the doctor.

Simon sighed. "You'll have to forgive her. She's -- she's butai zhengchang de." The total incomprehension in his patient's eyes made him shrug. "She's had a rough life," he elaborated.

The two just looked at each other for a long moment, then Xander shrugged. "Okay."

"That's it?"

"I doubt it, but it's none of my business," he responded calmly.

"Right," Simon said slowly.

A more or less comfortable silence fell until River danced back into the room. "Here they are!" she crowed, crossing over to Xander and sitting on the edge of his bed.

Xander turned to the door, a polite smile on his lips. It vanished as Mal reached the doorway, Zoë, Jayne, and Kaylee arrayed behind him. With startling speed, he rose, thrusting River behind him. "You're dead!" he gasped, one hand grabbing a scalpel from the counter. "We killed you!" He dove forward, blade flashing.

With a startled oath, Mal caught his arm, still in the doorway so neither Zoë nor Jayne could get a clean shot. Before they maneuvered enough that a shot could be fired, Simon plunged a hypo into their visitor's neck, and Xander fell limp.

"What the guay was that?" Mal demanded, picking up the scalpel that had dropped from the man's limp fingers.

Simon carefully took it away from him, locking it into a drawer. "Put him on the bed," he said. "He should be out for a bit, but I thought fast-acting was more important than long-lasting, and he was pretty worked up, it might wear off as soon as within a few minutes. I'll put restraints on him.

"Why not just toss him out the airlock?" Mal shouted. "He tried to kill me for no gorram reason! Tama de!"

"Tell you one thing it was," Jayne said slowly and unwontedly seriously. "That attack was pure fear. Only saw that look on a face one time in my life. Some shee-niou hundan convinced this twelve-year-old boy I was gonna rape his kid sister. Kid came at me bare-handed, wearin' that look-- knew flat-out he was gonna die for it, but he'd rather be dead than watch what he thought was comin'." He lifted Xander as he spoke, and dumped him back on the bed.

"What did you do?" Kaylee asked, horrified.

He glared at her. "I ain't no baby-killer! I knocked 'im out and left 'fore he woke up." He turned his attention back to Mal. "What's weird 'bout this here is I saw Xander, here, fight. And while maybe you could take him two falls in three -- and maybe not, I didn't see him that long, he could be better'n that -- that's not enough difference for that -- despair's what the preacher'd call it. It don't make no sense."

"River?" Simon's concerned tone broke through everything else, and everyone turned to where he had finished strapping Xander to the bed and was now looking worriedly at his sister, who was huddled in the corner, knees drawn up protectively, staring at Mal in abject horror.

Mal, startled, extended one hand, stepping forward, as he murmured, "River? What is it?"

She shrank back from him with a whimper. "It was like the poem," she said. "Like Christmas pie. Stuck in your thumb and pulled out an eyeball and smiled while he screamed and screamed and screamed."

"He's got two eyes, River -- which one am I sposta've plucked out?"

Simon took a protective step in front of his sister. "Perhaps the one that was replaced a month or so ago -- and rather poorly, judging by the fact that it doesn't match?"

"You said he saw too much," River whispered. "Squish."

"I never said no such thing!"

"I don't hold with pokin' out eyes," Jayne stated. "Man sees too much, then kill him clean. But pokin' his eyes out -- t'ain't civilized, and I don't hold with it!"

"Since when are you civilized?" asked Mal, goaded. "And I didn't poke out nobody's eye! Seems the sort of thing a body would recall, and I've got no memory of any such thing!" He turned to the others. "You don't believe this go shi, do you?"

To his shock, Kaylee shrank back behind Zoë. She, at least, met his eyes. "Whatever you did, I trust you had your reasons, sir."

"But I didn't I do /I anything!" He spun back to River. "I don't know what you think you saw, girl, but I never stuck out his gorram eye, and I'd thank you to tell 'em so!"

"Saw your face," she said softly, peering fearfully around Simon. "Felt your hand. Heard your voice. Felt your hate--" She cut herself off, a wrinkle of confusion rising on her forehead. "Not your hate." She glanced at Xander, then turned back to Mal, staring him in the eyes. "Not your hate," she repeated more firmly, her trembling stilling. "Not your heart, not your mind. Not you!" She suddenly threw herself around Simon, and Mal braced to protect himself from one of her crazy attacks, but she just collapsed against his chest, sobbing as she clung to him. "Not you," she repeated. "He looked like you and he sounded like you, but he wasn't you. Not you."

"That's right," he murmured soothingly, rubbing her back. He cast a vindicated glare over his shoulders at the others.

Zoë, at least, had the grace to look embarrassed. "Sorry, sir. Never would've doubted you, but for how you were joking about poking his eye out earlier."

"I was what?"

"With a barbecue fork, sir."

Mal sighed. "I wouldn't never've said it if I'd known he'd actually lost an eye."

"Plus, there was the other one," Kaylee said softly.

"The other what?"

"The eye you I did /I shoot out."

Mal's jaw dropped. "You are I not /I blaming me for Dobson! He'd just shot you, Kaylee! And it's not like I I meant /I to shoot his eye out -- he was supposed to just be dead!"

"An' I understand that, cap'n. It's just that, well, it made this feel a little too real. And it was so sudden-like. I know you wouldn't really do nothin' like that."

"Right," he said with a sigh. "So it's just a matter of convincing I him /I of this, afore he gets untied. Shiny."

"It'll be okay, cap'n. We'll s'plain it to him," Kaylee offered cheerfully.

"You've known me for years and when I explained it to you, not a soul among you believed me!"

"Well he doesn't know you at all, perhaps that will help," Simon said dryly. "At any rate -- it's time to find out. He's waking up."