Disclaimer: don't own it.
For the most part Lucrecia Crescent had been dying for many years, piece by piece, slowly and painfully until only a remnant remained encased in crystal. She could never really be at peace. This was her punishment for the dreadful crimes she committed.
The part of her which remained dwelled upon the events she regretted.
Science had always been her first priority so she had resisted the advances of Professor Hojo so she could concentrate on her thesis. He was fascinated by her dedication and he only desired her more when she told him that work came first.
Then she met Grimoire Valentine. He was passionate about his work as well but he lacked the underlying creepiness Hojo possessed. Grimoire had been eager to help her hunt for Chaos and the day they eventually gained access to the cave had been the happiest in her entire life.
Grimoire had watched with a subtle smile as her enthusiasm bubbled over. They transported Chaos back to her lab and placed the demon into a tank.
Lucrecia stared up at the marvellous beast, her heart swelled with pride.
"Thank you, Doctor Valentine; I never would have been able to do this without your support." She turned to face him.
"It was an honour to assist you, and I look forward to studying the specimen with you." He replied.
"Where would I be without your help and dedication?" she thanked him again, her voice filled with excitement.
"It's worth it, just to see your smile." Grimoire's deep red eyes met with hers.
For that moment she forgot all about work and gave into her heart. They kissed each other softly; she ran her fingers through his dark hair. She would always treasure the memory of his stubble against her chin.
They tried to focus on work but there was always a light hearted atmosphere between them, for the first time in her life she wanted to go out in the sun and spend time with another person instead of staying down in her lab.
She could only focus when Grimoire was there to encourage her.
Then, one terrible day, Chaos broke free. The monster aimed its attack straight for its captor with the intention of punishing her for holding it prisoner.
Grimoire acted fast and pushed her to safety, taking the blow himself.
Lucrecia sobbed uncontrollably as he lay dying in her arms.
Just as she was about to tell him that she loved him, he asked her to apologize to his son. Guilt struck her hard, he had a family and she had selfishly kept him to herself for so long. He returned to the life stream taking with him her innocence, her happiness, her enthusiasm and her love.
Life was empty for her after that day, it was the day she begun to die. A part of her was lost forever.
The universe conspired against her in a cruel way just a year or so later. Lucrecia waited in the manor for her newly assigned bodyguard to arrive. He entered the room, dressed smartly in his Turk uniform. He introduced himself as Vincent Valentine. Vincent had Grimoire's eyes. She couldn't bear to look into them. It was hard enough living with what had happened and now she would have a constant reminder. From that day she resented the presence of her bodyguard. It wasn't his fault so she tried as hard as she could to cover her resentment by being charming and friendly and by hiding the sadness that consumed her with smiles and attention.
After a few months of his employment they shared a picnic. Vincent was similar to his father only in appearance. He was quiet and nervous, more of a boy than a man, but he began to open up to her.
Lucrecia ignored his lingering glances and his obvious attraction to her. The very idea of kissing him made her heart tear in two. She tried to deny that he had fallen for her for as long as she could.
Then one day she found him in her lab, she had opened the files she had on Grimoire just so she could feel close to him again. Vincent had seen them.
The scientist lost it and shouted at him, another dose of guilt hit her hard. But, at least, she had thought, he might be deterred from her now.
She had been wrong; Vincent confessed his feelings for her that night. She tugged her hand away from his, struggled as he resisted, she wanted to get as far away from him as she could. "I'm so sorry!" she had said, but what did it matter. Lucrecia had hurt Vincent, but he was a good man, too good, and he let her go because all he wanted was for her to be happy.
He was the one that deserved happiness, not her.
As time went on she could feel her internal clock ticking. Her yearning for a child grew with every moment. Maybe she could finally bring some good into the world.
Hojo had been patiently waiting, all through her time with Grimoire and with Vincent. She would deny him no longer.
He smiled with satisfaction as Lucrecia walked towards him slowly. Her smile was dark and seductive. Little did she know that Vincent could see them.
She flung her body forward into Hojo's arms; he grasped her and kissed her passionately. Lucrecia had denied herself of love for so long that she was famished, her hands grabbed his neck and she kissed him back, roughly.
Vincent said nothing and merely walked away.
The two scientists became inseparable; Lucrecia preferred it this way as it was the perfect excuse to avoid Vincent.
Hojo wasn't the most talented scientist, but he was fearless. He would push the boundaries as far as he could and Lucrecia would help. She adored losing herself in his experiments, committing completely to whatever they were trying that day.
They experimented with uses for Jenova DNA. Gast was angry but they didn't care. When they injected a monster with Jenova they discovered the true extent of the discovery, it made the monster powerful.
After safely disposing of the monster and checking their notes, Hojo shocked her by sweeping all of the equipment off of his lab table.
Grasping her by her hips he lifted her onto the table and made love to her. She pulled his hair and laughed out in the sheer loss of control. Hojo helped her forget the past; she wanted to have a life with him.
It did not take long for her to fall pregnant. She told Hojo excitedly, then she muttered the words she would regret for her whole life.
"We could make the baby stronger with Jenova." She breathed into his ear.
As soon as that idea had been planted into his mind he became obsessed with creating the ultimate human being.
Lucrecia happily let him inject her and the baby. When Vincent discovered what they were up to he could not hide his disgust.
This made her so angry, if only she had listened to him.
Vincent stayed, in spite of his disgust; she suspected that he wanted to look out for her.
Hojo became increasingly resentful and almost jealous of the Turks presence.
The female scientist realized the extent of her lover's darkness when she found the young son of Grimoire lying dead on the floor.
Their relationship became strained, she wasn't sure she could trust him anymore.
Gast abandoned them, he even tried to get the Shinra to retract their funding. They refused, of course, as they had got wind of the Jenova experiments and wanted Hojo to work on projects for them.
When Hojo got bored of experimenting on Vincent, Lucrecia salvaged his body and she restored him as best she could. The cost was so great that she came to wonder if he would be better off dead.
The baby came before she finished working on Vincent. The labour was long and hard. She sobbed as the doctors handed Hojo his son.
"Let me hold him, please!" she cried out.
Hojo was annoyed when he found Vincent in Lucrecia's lab, he acted as if it amused him and he goaded her about it. In reality he was furious with her. Surely it must have been an act of Love? He had betrayed her for the last time and now he was going to make her pay.
The biggest part of her died that day; she no longer wanted to live with herself.
As she removed Vincent from his tank she told him how sorry she was, she had injected him with Jenova as well. She dressed him in some of Grimoire's old clothes and laid his body in a coffin.
"Vincent, you have an eternity to find someone to love you, find somebody with light in their heart, an opposite to the darkness that has corrupted mine."
Only one thing remained now, Lucrecia took a sheet of paper and wrote a letter to her son.
"My Beloved Sephiroth,
I am your true mother; I love you more than anything. What I did to you, my baby, is unforgivable and that's why I can't be with you. I cannot justify my actions, but know that I only wanted to insure that you were healthy and strong when you came into this world. It's a dark place to live and I wanted to give you the best head start that I could. Your dad loves you too, but I hurt him and he's fallen further into madness. Please help him before he is consumed completely. We both have committed terrible crimes. It is my dearest wish for you to grow up good and true. Become a hero, my son, do what is right always. My precious, special baby, I hope you will live a life in the light, Stay away from the darkness.
Love forever,
Your Mother, Lucrecia Crescent.
She placed the tear stained letter within a book in the library. It was unlikely that he would ever read it. Perhaps it was better if he never knew the truth.
Lucrecia returned to the Chaos Cave and encased what remained of her in the crystal, after all it was a home fit for a demon.
Sephiroth read through tome after tome in the basement of the Shinra manor.
Rage pumped in his blood as he learnt of the experiments done on his mother, Jenova. He learnt that her body was still contained within the reactor. Sephiroth would go to her and together they would claim this world. He left one book unread upon the shelf as he strode from the manor, never to return and never to know that the forgotten book contained the letter from his real mother, the mother who had loved him so, the mother he would never know.
Her dreams for him were never to be fulfilled.
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