She Bangs
Chapter 3 Tobi is a Good Boyfriend
"Hey Itachi," Deidara said suspiciously. "Where's is Zetsu, un?" "Why do you want to know?" Itachi said warily. "No reason," Deidara said. "Sempai!!" a talking sheet that looked a lot like Tobi said. "Tobi wants his mask back." "For the last time Tobi no, un!" Deidara said. "You look hot without it and it's the hotties that get boyfriends."
"Oh I get it now," Itachi said. "You're helping Tobi hook up with Zetsu." "Damn straight," Deidara said. "Now take off the blanket Tobi, un!" "No!" Tobi said. "Damn it Tobi!" Deidara said. "Good boys listen to their sempais!!" "Deidara sempai owes Tobi big time," Tobi said as he started to remove the huge sheet.
"Trust me Tobi you'll be thanking me later, un," Deidara said. "Oh my God!!" Itachi said as Tobi removed the sheet. "Tobi you are so hot!!" "Itachi-san are you okay?!" Tobi said worried. "You have a nosebleed!" "Yeah I'm fine," Itachi said trying to stop the blood. "Wait right here I'll go get Zetsu."
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"Alright Itachi where is this fucking absolutely must see damn thing you told us about," Hidan said. "I told them to wait right here," Itachi said. "Hey guys," Deidara said out of breath. "Tobi ran away so I had to chase him, un." "Tobi's ugliness is killing everyone!!" Tobi cried from under the sheet. "For the last time Tobi you're not Ugly now take the sheet off, un!!"
"NO!!" Tobi cried and turned to run away only to be stopped by Zetsu. "Z-zetsu san!" Tobi said surprised. "Tobi take the sheet off," Zetsu said. "Yes Zetsu-san," Tobi said reluctantly as he removed the sheet. "Oh,"said Sasori. "My," said Kisame. "Fucking," said Hidan. "God," said Zetsu. "Tobi you're hot!!" "I have the tissues," Itachi said passing them out. "Damn," Hidan said. "I'd tap that ass any day!"
"For once I have to agree with you," Kakuzu said taking a handful of tissues from Itachi. "Zetsu," Tobi said. "Do you like Tobi? Because Tobi likes Zetsu a whole lot." "Dude I think he just asked you out," Pein said from out of nowhere. "Where did you come from," Kakuzu asked.
"Mrs. Bitch is pissing me off so I thought I'd cut class," Pein said. "You guys do realize that's not here real name right?" Kisame said. "Do I look like I care?" Pein said. "Anyways Zetsu you never did answer Tobi. Do you like him or not?" "Yes," Zetsu said. "Tobi is a very good boy."
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"I need your help," Sasori said to Hidan in Math later that day. "How may I be of assistance?" Hidan said all assassin like. "I need help winning Deidara's love," Sasori said. "Seeing Tobi hook up with Zetsu today made me realize how sad and pathetic this whole situation with Deidara really is. I mean, this is Tobi we're talking about."
"Well the boy does have a nice ass," Hidan asked. "Anywho meet me at my house after your job. We'll begin then." "Don't you mean our house?" Sasori asked. "DO I FUCKING LOOK LIKE A FUCKING FAG TO YOU?! DO I?! IT'S MY FUCKING HOUSE GOD DAMN IT!! MY HOUSE!! NO YOURS!! NOT RUN'S!! MINE!!"
"Hidan," Kakuzu said. "First off yes you are a fag because last nice you said my ass is so fine you want to pound it into the ground until I can't walk. Second don't you that word because you sound like Texas when you should be sounding like California. Finally quit screaming because your giving me a headache and now everyone thinks I'm dating a psychopath." "Well you kinda are," Sasori said only to have a book thrown in his face.
A/N: In case you didn't know 'Run's House' is the name of a show on MTV. I hate it but I couldn't resist making the joke. Thanks for reading!
Trivia!: In 2008 gay marriage became legal in California on Deidara's birthday.