SARAH : By the end of this chapter you'll both want to kill me.
REENEY : Can I do it?
SARAH : Do what?
REENEY : Press the big red beeping button!!
LYN : Not a beeping red button.
SARAH : Why do you want to press it?!
REENEY : Because it's there. NOW LET ME PRESS IT!!
SARAH : NO!!
MALIK : I'm going to go kill Four kids, they took away my pay raise.
LYN : pulls out guns I'm DEFINITELY coming with you.
MALIK : Sweet.
REENEY : LET ME PRESS THE FUCKING BUTTON!!
SARAH : IT'S MY BUTTON DAMN IT!!
RYOU :Watermellon.
KAIBA : Just start the chapter.
CHAPTER START!!
Lyn smiled leaning her head back against the park bench. She was having a very good day today. Maybe that made her a sadist, some of her intelligent blonde friends would say that it did. Where as some of her equally intelligent black haired friends would say she only wishes she could be a sadist. Which makes you wonder why Lyns having such a good day today and who are these genius friends of hers?
Well it's very simple really. It all started the previous day, i'm sure you all remember it. The group had arrived at the Ishtal house, and through a series of events to retarded to explain had ended up staying the night. A night that Juhux did not want to relive. Though Lyn and Reeney seemed to have a good enough time.
Reeney, kept sneaking away to see Malik. An action that Juhux desperately tried to stop. Not that she managed to, she kept getting derailed by Mariku. Who she later found out had been payed twenty bucks in advance to keep her busy. Juhux couldn't help feeling that Bakura sensei was going to kill her.
Lyn however was having the time of her life, watching the thief girls run about like actors in her own little play. It was hilarious, nothing could be funnier. Or at least, that was what she had thought. Then the next day had arrived, and the group found themselves at the mall. Of course Lyn had tried getting Kaiba to show up but he had said that he was to busy and would meet her later.
Which was fine, he was probably still partially recovering from his run in with the room of pink doom. The doctor had said that all he needed was some medication and a good nights sleep. But hell, what did doctors know? They were pure evil! But now they had a bit of a problem, they were bored shitless.
Thats right, they couldn't think of anything to do. Which is pretty much the definition of bored right there. But hey, I can say anything I want, I AM the authoress. So Durka Durka bitches!! TASTE MY EVIL AUTHORESS RATH!!
Ahem, so anyway, back to the story. Juhux glared at the sky having heard the entire conversation the authoress had just had with herself. And let me tell you she was not happy.
"Sarah." she growled cracking her knuckles threateningly. "If you're going to screw with me get down here and face me like a man." The thief GIRL seemed to be forgetting that neither she nor the authorESS were male.
I would, her creator typed, but i can't, weak as a newborn bunny and all that.
Juhux didn't seem to be listening, she was to busy trying to think of a way to get revenge on the authoress for giving her several heart attacks. Via Reeney.
Lyn chuckled grabbing Juhux and dragging her away from her fight with Sarah.
"Just leave the idiot to her fun." she chided. " I'll beat her up in an IM war later."
Somewhere not far from the mall, a blonde authoress gulped. She knew something horrible was soon to come.
Damn you Lyn, she typed, damn you.
The brunette only scoffed at her pulling Juhux into the evil store of pink we call CLAIRES. Yeah, I made you go in there.
"AAHHHHHH!!" Malik screamed running out of the store like his life depended on it. "THIS WAS A WEAPONS SHOP A MINUTE AGO I SWEAR!!" and he was right, not long ago this Claires WAS a weaponry shop. But due to my evil revenge, it is now a pink Claires place.
"I dunno" Reeney said putting a fuzzy purple crown on Mariku's head. " I kinda like it."
Mariku grimaced pulling the item from his head and burning it. " As much as i'm loathe to admit it. I might just be almost fond of this place." With that he picked up a pair of fuzzy black and pink handcuffs.
Reeney's eyes lit up and she immediately snatched the item from her fellow sadist. "I want these."
"To bad." Mariku taunted grabbing them back. "They're mine."
Juhux groaned hitting her head against an overly pink display case. " Great." she cursed to herself. "My evil stalker has a fetish."
Malik nodded, his usually tan face pale. "I am suddenly not a sadist because of some strange twist of fate and clever writing." he shivered. " Or maybe this place just scares the shit out of me."
Reeney glared at him throwing the handcuffs across the room. "You better be fucking scared of this place." she frowned." And if you aren't a sadist anymore the two of us are gonna need to talk about a few, damned monkey priest fucking things."
Malik twitched but said nothing.
Mariku however smirked snaking an arm around Juhux's waist. "What is your problem my little dagger?" he whispered. "Are you afraid?"
"FUCK YES I'M AFRAID!!" she screamed hitting Mariku in the chin. "We're stuck in this evil pink room with no way out!!" she pointed at Lyn who was collapsed on the floor foaming at the mouth. "Look what this place did to Lyn!!"
"Don't send the pinkies after me Fei." she murmered. "I DON'T WANT ANY BAMBOO!!"
Reney blinked poking lyn in the side of the head with her foot. Lyn jumped slightly hitting her head on a display rack. "Lynny's lost it."
Malik perked up almost immediately. "I'll take her out of the store!!" he volunteered. A desperate gleam in his eye.
'I dare you to try.' Sarah typed.
The egyptian blinked looking at the ceiling. "Why?"
She snickered echoingly. 'Cause it'll be funny.'
"Well thats a bad sign." said Mariku picking up a pair of black gloves with glitter on them. he sighed. "Gloves shouldn't have glitter on them, it's just not right."
"IGNORE THE GLOVES!!" Malik snapped snatching the article of clothing from his darker half. "WE'RE TRAPPED IN A FUCKING CLAIRES!!"
"We're not trapped stupid." Reeney snorted carrying a pile of sparkly things that she had picked up at random and placing them on the check out counter. " We can leave whenever we want. Hey Lynny can you buy me this?"
"No touchy my money." Lyn hissed twithing convulsively under a pile of pink t-shirts.
"Fuck you to bitch, Uncle buy me this or i'll tell daddy you let me sleep at Malik's house."
Juhux blinked staring at her self proclaimed niece then she rolled her eyes pulling out her wallet. "Whatever." she muttered crossly.
"YAY!!" Reeney cheered hugging the older blonde. "Now buy me a knife a pretty dress and lots of random shiny things!!"
Juhux of course paled considerably her left eye twitching but still handed a small black and silver credit card to the store clerk. Lyn who was still on the floor traumatized started laughing insanely tossing several of the t-shirts into the air wherethey landed on her face. "AAAHHHHHH!! she yelled getting up and running around the store. " IT BUUUURRRRNNNNSSS!!"
"I'm bored can we leave now?" Mariku demanded sitting down on a small overly pink folding chair.
'You can't leave!' Sarah typped mockingly. 'You are trapped...TRAPED!'
"No we're not." Reeney said handing her bags to Juhux. "Come on let's leave. Uncle's gonna buy me stuff." WIth that she grabbed Lyn by the back of her shirt and dragged her out of the store. Their companions followed in a state of awe and confusion.
"FRREEEEDDOOOOMMMMM!!" Lyn cried dropping to her knees. " SWEET FREAKING FREEEDDDOOOMMM!!"
Juhux clacked her teeth together. "Why didn't you do that earlier?" she asked.
"Because." the raven haired girl explained sitting next to Lyn and putting on a shiny plastic crown. "That was fun."
'Reeeennneeeyyy' Sarah typed in a whine. 'Stop breaking the plot.'
"Well then stop making it boring!" Reeney snapped. " GIVE US SOME NINJA TO FIGHT OR SOMETHING!!"
'No!' Sarah snappd back. 'It's my story and there aren't supposed to be any ninja till long after Bakura comes back.'
"OH COME ON!!" Reeney groaned pulling at a green strand of hair. " There HAVE to be ninja!!
'NO NINJA!!'
Lyn twitched getting up and dusting off her jeans. "Thats it. Come on Juhux I have an idea."
"Well this should be fun." Juhux muttered allowing herself to be dragged off. "Where are we going?"
"You'll see when we get there." the brunette explained pulling the thief down the many rows upon rows of stores. After a while they came across one with a big sign over top of it reading. 'Not Sarah's Base Of Operations.'
Juhux rolled her eyes. " Let me guess" she said. "Sarah's in there."
Lyn nodded. "Yeah and since you're supposedly a trained thief and all I want you to break us in."
The thief shrugged walking up to the glass door. "Hmm now let me see." she reached into her pocket and pulled out a small black box with a heavy lock on it. "Ahh," she murmmered. "Here it is."
She held the case carefully in one hand, and then very carefully, she hit it against the glass causing it t break. After that she just reached in and unlocked the door.
"Well that was anticlimactic." Lyn muttered." If I had known you were just going to break the door I could've just done it myself."
"Hey," Juhux said with mock indignation. "It takes a lot of finess to break a door."
The taller girl snorted pushing past the now broken door. "I'm sure it does. Now come on."
--
Inside the room sat a girl who seemed quite content if not a little strange. With bright blue eyes she glared playfully at a small rather odd little pen that seemed to have a microphone on it. She was talking into it quietly occasionally flicking a strand of blonde hair out of her face or smoothing out her blue jeans and poet shirt. The pen seemed to say something and she groaned hitting her head against an overly cluttered wooden desk.
"No Reeney" she muttered into the pen.
Said pen yelled back at her in an angry voice that sounded like Reeney's. " Why the fuck not?!" it said.
"Just because." she answered tapping her high heeled boot against the carpet.
The pen growled at her which was actually pretty damn creepy. "FUCKING WHY NOT!!"
Sarah twitched, her lips pulling back into a toothy frown. " Because I don't like ninja!"
Reeney snorted of course making the pen snort too. " Fucking pussy."
"Shut your mouth before I erase your face!!" The authoress threatened.
"MAKE ME YA DAMN PUSY!!"
Sara immediately stood up glareing daggers at the pen."I'M TELLING YOU REENEY I'M NOT PUTTING IN ANY NIJA!!" she screamed.
"PUT IN SOME NINJA!!" The pen screamed back."I'M BORED!!"
"SCREW YOUR BOREDOM NO NINJA FOR YOU!!"
Lyn and Juhux stood in the doorway watching the argument with amused expressions. Finally Lyn chuckled stepping forward, Juhux following close behind. "I hate to break it to you Sarah. But you look pretty darn crazy." she said.
Sarah's head snapped up her wide eyes taking in the site of her friend and her creation. "How the bloody hell did you find me?" she asked astonished.
Juhux blinked. " Are you serious? The sign on the door said 'Not Sarah's Base of Operations.' It wasn't hard"
"Not like you found it though." Lyn interjected, she was examining one of the many papers on Sarah's desk. " You may just be themost unobservant thief i've ever see." She frowned. " What exactly are these papers anyway?"
"Oh god." Sarah moaned trying to snatch the paper away. "Don't read that it's not done!'
Lyn raised an eyebrow. "You're writing a Death Note story?"
"WHAT?!" The pen screamed stunning them all. " OH MY FUCKING SHIT LET ME READ IT!!"
Sarah groaned cradleing her head in her hands. " It's not done yeeettt!"
"Sorry to cut in." Juhux snapped. "But what the fuck is Death Note?"
Lyn looked at the paper again and then burst out laughing. " Apparently you'll find out."
At that point Sarah snatched the paper back blushing furiously. She had a thing about not likeing people reading her stuff until its done. "Bitch." she muttered storing it back in its pile.
The brunette rolled her eyes. " Oh come on its your own fault for leaving it out in the open."
"DAMNIT LET ME READ IT!!" Reeey yelled. "WHAT'S IT ABOUT?!"
Sarah twitched again bringing the pen up to her mouth. " YOU'LL FIND OUT WHEN I'M DONE!!"
"TELL ME NOW!!"
"NO!!"
"Thats it." Juhux was now officially sick of this adventure. So she snatched the pen from Sarah earning an incredulous glare. Then examining the screaming pen she found a small switch with the words On and Off on either side of it. Frowning she flipped it to off feeling a wave of satisfaction as the thing stopped screaming.
"Well that done." she said and grinning happily she stuffed it in her pocket.
Lyn nodded turning to look at Sarah and immediately chuckling "Close your friggin mouth Sarah. The flies will get in."
Sarah snapped her mouth shut, her teeth meeting with a small clack. "Thank you." she growled.
Lyn grinned. "No problem. Now come on." she said grabbing the younger girls arm. "We should go find Reeney."
Sarah winced. "Can't I just go jump off a nice high cliff?"
Her thief creation grinned evilly grabbing her other arm. "Oh no creator." she cackled. "You aren't getting off that easily."
And strangely enough as the two cackling girls dragged the blonde authoress to her doom. A flash of Lightning lit up the steadily darkening sky behind them. Today would not be a good day for Sarah.
END CHAPTER
SARAH : I'm srewed
LYN : Why on earth did you put yourself in here?
SARAH : I got bored, couldn't think of anything
LYN : Ha ha. Shin giving you a hard time?
SARAH : Yeah just a bit. Evil muse.
REENEY : WHAT DEATH NOTE STORY?!
JUHUX : Jeez I have a headache the size of Egypt.
SARAH : I put the prolouge for it up already. You can go read it.
LYN : Ugh. Rea's crazes always spread.
REENEY : Hey i'm the world dead sexiest virus bitch.
MALIK : Yes you are.
SARAH : -chews on plastic.
REENEY : ...WTF??
SARAH : foooddddd!!
LYN : Well ain't that strange?
REENEY : ZOMBIE SARAH!!
LYN : BRRAAAIIINNNNSSS!!
REENEY: EYYEEEELIIIINNNEERRR!!
SARAH : FOOODDDDD!!
RYOU : ...Screw this i'm leaving.