Author's Ramblings: Okay, so I'm on a roll with this. And guess what? All the flashbacks in this chapter are mine! Yay me!

Thanks to: Chris and Susie for being sounding boards.

Chapter 6: The Memory Of Your Face

"What are you doing?" Rory asked, laughing nervously as he grabbed her hand and yanked her off her seat at the restaurant. There was gleam in his eyes that only meant one thing: he was going to do something impulsive. And make her do it with him. She looked around apprehensively as people from other tables turned a little to see what was going on. He pulled her close and she shot him a wary smile. "Tristan?"

He smiled back at her, slipping one arm around her waist and clasped her right hand in his. "Dance with me."

"What?" she asked and then laughed disbelievingly. "I don't think we're supposed to be dancing here."

"And why not?" he asked as he brought both of her arms around his neck and his own around her waist. "There's music and two very good looking people in an embrace. I think dancing would be inevitable."

She shook her head and smiled in amusement. "Incorrigible."

"Thank you."

Rory smiled a little at the memory as she flipped through the same photo album she had been looking at since her father had left her room. There were mostly pictures with Tristan and she couldn't help but look at them over and over again, trying desperately to recreate that feeling that stirred inside her every time they were happy together.  

She remembered the time when he had no power over her. When the times were simpler and she was sixteen and oblivious to what real passion, real pain was all about. When she didn't love him and he was just a boy she knew – one she didn't like very much. Back when they had only kissed in a moment of weakness, formed a tentative yet doomed friendship and then he had been shipped off to military school while she returned to her life, her dream of greatness in the heart of Stars Hollow.

But he waltzed back into her life as easily as he had left and after their second meeting, she was never the same again.

She turned away from the table after collecting her cap and gown, the crowd parted ever so slightly, as if she were in a movie and saw him standing there, talking to a guy. His hands were in his pockets and he laughed a little at what the other guy said and nodded when he walked away. She remained rooted, wondering what he was doing back and little shocked to see him there as if he had never left.  He turned and his eyes landed on her.

She expelled the breath she didn't even know she was holding. A slow, devastatingly handsome smile spread across his face as their eyes locked and he moved towards her, weaving effortlessly through the throng of Chilton students.

Then, he was standing in front of her and her heart was racing a million miles an hour. There was that meaningful gleam in his eyes again, the one that sent a little shiver racing up her spine. "Hello Mary."

The use of her nickname and the familiar way his voice sounded when he said it sent her out of her daze and she felt her lips quirking into an unwilling smile. "Tristan DuGrey. What are you doing here?"

He waved his hand in the direction of all the activity around them. "Graduation, of course. Grandfather pulled some strings and here I am. Did you miss me?"

He hadn't changed. He was still confident, even more so if it was possible, he definitely seemed taller and if she weren't afraid his head would explode, she would have told him that he looked more handsome than she remembered. Shaking her head slightly in disbelief she managed to sound sincere. "I did."

Something flickered in his eyes. Happiness? She couldn't be sure but her heart flipped a little when he smiled at her and slid an arm around her shoulder. He led her outside into the courtyard. "Good to know."

After graduation, she had seen him at a few parties, always making out with some girl or the other. It bothered her a bit because she had hoped if something had changed it would have been his womanizing ways. But she was with Jess then and it was something she got used to. Soon, she was leaving for Harvard and he headed to Yale. She got a phone call from him and they promised that they would write to one another.

Then, in one letter he announced that he was coming to Boston for a long weekend for his Grandfather and those three days had changed his place in her life completely. She had been obsessing about a bad grade – the result of working too hard, her grandparents unbelievably high expectations and then finally an ugly, heart wrenching yet inevitable break up with Jess.

She was so miserably immersed in her problems that she had rejected his offer to join him and Paris to lunch the day he arrived in Boston. When her two friends didn't return from lunch, she assumed they were out somewhere – having fun or making out. As ridiculous as that thought sounded it was highly plausible. For Tristan, because he'd make out with any girl with breasts and for Paris, because even though she was over her crush on him, hadn't really closed the door on that opportunity.

That idea has sickened her and she ended up at the frat party, where she got drunk and ended up in Tristan's bed. Alone. He had been sweet and understanding and she had asked him out the following night – to thank him.

Little did she know that, Fate had other plans.

"Here you go," Tristan said as he handed her a mug of coffee and sat down on his sofa, next to her. "So you're feeling better, now?"

She nodded slightly and took a tentative sip of the hot liquid. "Yeah, getting all that stuff off my chest felt really nice. I don't want you to take it the wrong way, Tristan. I love my grandparents and I know they want what's best for me. I just feel like there's so much pressure on me right now. I just started college and I already feel overwhelmed."

"That's natural."

"I know," she answered and placed the mug on the coffee table in front of them. "I just never thought it would be like this. In high school, I couldn't wait to get here and give it my all."

"And now it seems like your all isn't going to be enough?"

She sighed a bit, amazed that he understood her so well. "Yes."

He placed his hand on her knee in a comforting gesture. "I wish I could tell you that everything is going to be okay and that you're worrying for nothing but I can't. Because I don't know what everything is going to be like. All I know is that you, Rory, have got to be one of the most intelligent and determined people I know. You have the love and support of all of your family and friends and of course that quirky town of Stars Hollow – and that…that's going to be enough."

She looked up at him sideways, touched, and then she started laughing. "I can't believe you pulled that off."

"I can pull anything off. I'm a good actor, remember?" he teased back with a laugh. "I meant it, though."

She nodded slightly and smiled. "Thank you."

The look on his face was so intense; his eyes were bright and sincere. He looked like he did the night they had kissed at Madeline's party. It was so rare to see him like this without the smirk, the innuendo or that gleam in his eyes.

She was drawn to him all of a sudden like he had some magnetic pull over her.

 And before either of them knew what was happening, they were kissing passionately. He scooped her into his arms and carried her into his bedroom.

She remembered tugging at his shirt and pulling it above his head.

She remembered him asking if she was sure.

In response, she had kissed him so hard that it removed all doubt from both of their minds.

She had lost herself to him that night.

Rory closed her eyes to keep her tears at bay. That night had been amazing. He had made her first time special and memorable, kissing her, touching her so that every nerve in her body was on edge, putting her needs and pleasure above his and treating her like she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.

The next morning they had screwed it up.

~*~ ~*~ ~*~

Tristan bounced his knee, ever so slightly as he was seated next to his Grandfather in the back of Janlan's Rolls. Janlan had confessed he had told a little white lie about the car being in repairs to get Tristan to come pick him up. He was confused. He knew that his grandfather wanted him to come over to pick him up and that meant Janlan had a reason or a lecture. But the older DuGrey said nothing. A little unnerved, he opted to remain quite as well, watching the mansions passing by through the window.

Why get into something he wasn't going to enjoy anyway?

"How's Lorelai doing?" Janlan asked finally.

"Okay, I guess," he answered, shifting a little in his place. "But you know, Lorelai. She's in control. Taking care of everyone in that house all by herself."

"She's a good woman," his grandfather said contemplatively. "She doesn't like you very much."

He snorted at the understatement. "Yeah, I know."

"Oh yeah! Go ahead. Walk away, Tristan."

He turned around, scowling and almost growled at the older woman. "What do you want from me?"

"For once, I want you to get over your pride and talk to my daughter. Not at her but with her!" Lorelai answered, sounding angry and desperate at the same time. "She has done nothing to deserve this kind of treatment from you. Especially after what she's been through and - "

"What about what I have been through, Lorelai?" he cut her off. "Does that even matter to anyone? None of this has been easy for me, either and I'm sick and tired of all of you making it all about her."

Lorelai was shocked by the harshness of his tone but he was beyond caring about what she thought of him at that moment. She folded her arms across her chest and gave him a contemptuous glare. "You selfish bastard."

He let out a bitter, derisive chuckle. "Selfish? Yeah. Bastard? Well no. I assure you of my legitimacy, madam."

"Get out!"

"I'm sorry, Lorelai, this isn't something you can control," he responded, leaning against the door. He swept one arm in the air in a dramatic gesture. "This is Rory's apartment and she's not sixteen, anymore. You can't order anyone out."

She shook her head in disappointment. "What happened to you?"

His jaw set rigidly. "Your daughter happened to me."

"Tristan?" Janlan snapped a finger in front of his face and yanked him out of his reverie. "We're here."

"Oh," he said and got out of the car and followed his grandfather into the Gilmore mansion. At least now he wouldn't feel so isolated inside. He had another DuGrey on his side now.

The two men entered the living room that seemed to be occupied by all the inhabitants of house from the morning: Emily, Lorelai, Luke, Christopher, Paris and Jess. Rory was standing near the glass door that led to the garden, unaware of anything going on around her. He stood in a corner as Janlan embraced Emily and Lorelai and offered his condolence and then walked over to Rory, not saying a word.

"Janlan," she said finally looking up at him and accepting his embrace. "How are you?"

"Oh you know me, I manage," he answered with a warm smile.

A wide smile spread across her face at that and Tristan looked away. So much for having Janlan on his side. Who was he kidding? His grandfather would take Rory's side in a heartbeat. Tristan slinked over to the drink cart and poured himself a small glass of brandy. It was too early to be drinking but he was going to need it in a room full of people who hated him. He lifted the glass to his mouth and swallowed the contents in one greedy gulp. He glanced down at the bottle and murmured, "my only friend."

"I wish you'd stop drinking," Rory reprimanded him as he paced in study. He looked up to see her standing at the door, a purse in her hand and a smile on her face. "I hate it when you get drunk."

He gave her a charming grin. "It's only one glass of brandy."

"That's how it starts," she corrected him as she walked over to the desk and deposited her purse. "So what's wrong?"

"My father's getting on my nerves. You didn't have to come."

She shrugged and leaned against the desk. "You sounded real upset on the phone. I wanted to make sure you were okay. What did Mr. DuGrey do now?"

It was his turn to shrug as he came to his desk and leaned against it too. "The usual. My grades weren't satisfactory. My credit card bills were too high. I spent too much money on jewelry…"

Her brows furrowed at that and she reached dangled the diamond bracelet on her left wrist in front of his face and looked at him accusingly. "You said this didn't too much."

He smiled, pulled her wrist to his lips and kissed it softly. "It didn't."

"Tristan! I don't want to be the reason you and your dad are fighting," she pouted a little and he had to check the urge to kiss her. "Do you still have the receipt for this? You could return it."

"I gave it to you as a gift. I'm not returning it. To hell with William."

Her eyes widened and he wanted to laugh at the dismay in her eyes. Rory always believed that if he tried harder, he could manage to make amends with his father. He didn't have the heart to tell her that some parent-child relations weren't always as easy to fix, as was the one she had with Lorelai. "Tristan, he's your father."

"Yes. We share the same DNA. That's about it, Rory." He stood straighter and pulled her up with him, sliding his arms around her waist. She seemed disappointed in him but he ignored it. "Let's not talk about my father. I'm glad you came."

"I came to see you if you were okay and since you obviously are, I'm going to go. I need to study."

"Stay a while," he whispered in her ear and then nipped it with his teeth. When she shuddered a little, he smiled in satisfaction. "I have my own apartment which means I have no roommates. We're alone."

He kissed the skin behind her ear and then trailed kisses down the side of her neck.

"I really need to study. I really need to - " she started to say but he cut her off by covering her mouth with his.

They didn't talk after that.

A hand weighed on his shoulder and he turned to see Janlan behind him. "Are you okay?"

"Just thinking."

"Ah yes." Janlan filled helped himself to a glass of brandy, knowing Emily would not mind. "Memories can haunt your soul."

Tristan's lips twisted wryly. Hell yeah.