MoonDragon: Wow... It's been so long, I'm sure all of you thought I was giving up on this story, ha ha. I'm sure Ilost some readers since it's been that long. Sorry about that. I just got done with Drivers Ed, went to Cedar Point, Lake Geneva, and relaxed all summer from the last update until now, so I guess I lied when I said I'd be able to write a lot this summer.

The good news is that I'm taking a creative writing class this year, so that'll force me to write, ha ha. I've been kind of thinking of the title, I wish I could change it, but it's been that for so long I shouldn't. If I could though, I'd want it to be Petal of a Memory. Sounds lame? Who cares, whatever, the title is staying the same anyways.

Honestly, I don't know exactly where this story is going. I know how it'll end, but the middle is being made up as I go one chapter at a time. How long will this be? Pfft, how would I know? I want it to be a long one though for some reason. Over 100,000 words would be amazing. I don't feel there's enough 100,000 word stories on here with Usagi and Mamoru.

Oh yeah, someone asked me about Mamoru's alter identity when his memories were gone: Midnight knight. Um... he died? Ha ha, I completely forgot about that, sorry. Hmm... they should've just called him Midknight... sounds and looks kewler and it's less repetitive.

So, tell me what you think of this chapter. I don't know when I'll update next... hopefully soon. Don't trust me on that, we've already been over the fact that I'm not trustworthy. But remember: the more reviews I get, the more eager I am to get the next chapter up as fast as I can.

Unspoken Memories

Chapter 19

Usagi seemed to be fretting over something as she feverishly nibbled on her bottom lip. Inside he felt slightly dejected that she seemed to have forgotten he was coming over tonight, but he was more worried than disappointed at the time being. Her wound wasn't a pretty sight when he first laid eyes on it. He was praying it had gotten better since then; Mamoru hadn't seen it since the first day he had patched it up.

"Yes, let's just stand here and not say anything," he sarcastically remarked folding his arms in a joking manor. He raised his eyebrow upwards. Pulled from her thoughts, Usagi nervously laughed making room for him to enter.

"Oh, um… yeah… right. Come on in."

Something was up with her; it was evident in the way her speech sounded. Her entire manor seemed fidgety and unsettled as she shifted from foot to foot. As Mamoru pondered over what could be plaguing her thoughts he stepped inside and settled his first-aid kit onto her coffee table which he brought with him. He heard the door slowly close as if in hesitance.

"I know why you're acting strange…" he began, starting to piece together the answer from the situation. Usagi seemed to tense as she concentrated heavily on his next words.

'She's stuttering and moving from foot to foot because it hurts to stand up right now. That must be it. Way to go, Mamoru. She should be resting, but because of you she had to get up and answer the door while being in pain. I haven't even been here for two minutes and I'm already screwing up!'

"It's the wound, isn't it-"

"What are you talking about?!" she exploded. "It's still there! Really, it is! How could you even think it wasn't?!" The ebony haired man had to take a step backwards at the suddenness of her outburst before recomposing himself.

"I… never said it wasn't," he hesitated. "I just figured it was hurting, and that was why you're acting so weird."

"Eh? No… no, it's doesn't really hurt at all… in fact it's like it's not even there-" She clamped her fingers over her mouth and gave him a worried look. Mamoru saw her throw a troubled look towards the two cats on the sofa, and was it just him or did the black one sigh?

"… Are you feeling alright, Usagi? Here, lie down on the couch and I'll do my best to fix it up some more." He lightly grasped her elbow leading her over to the furniture. He had to pull a bit harder than he thought he would have to since she seemed to not be helping at all. It was like she was trying to prolong it, in fact.

"Do you really have to do this? I mean, I'm sure you're very busy. I don't want to be a burden to you. It's absolutely no problem if you can't do it today!" Mamoru smiled down at her as she plopped down into the cushion. The white and black felines hopped on down and moved into another room giving them some privacy.

He knelt so they were eye-level. And for some reason he unconsciously took her hand in both of his taking much delight in the blush that invaded her cheeks.

"This is no trouble at all. If you're in pain I'm brush you aside for anything. I want to help you, Usagi. You're… important to me…" That last part wasn't meant to come out, but he realized it was true. It hadn't been very long since they first met, but already she was special to him.

Usagi's fidgeting nature then seemed to grow wings and take flight as a gentle smile overtook her features. Her eyelids slowly draped over a bit of her eyes as they sparkled with warmth. She lightly squeezed his hands with her own still giving him that caring look as a tiny stain of blush remained.

'She's so beautiful…' he couldn't help but think. His cheeks flamed as he was getting lost in her crystal blue eyes. He wanted to dive in and drown in the color and have the warmth she was emitting from them embrace him.

Usagi slowly leaned forward as her eyes began to close, and his eyes were then drawn to her lips; full and pink that seemed to be slightly puckered. His heart could have leapt over buildings at the rate it was going as she got closer and closer to his face. Mamoru tilted his head to receive what he hoped was going to arrive. He was about to cup her cheek until he noticed her little lips were heading higher than his.

She kissed him directly on the forehead, and her lips remained there for several seconds. It seemed as if all of the warmth and gentleness he witnessed in her eyes was transmitting from her to him as it flowed into him in waves through her peck. He inaudibly sighed as the feeling overtook him.

When she leaned back to sit on the couch again the feeling went with her. Sure, he felt the aftereffects of her chaste kiss which was muddling his thoughts, but it was much more effecting when her lips still rested on his forehead. It was enough to leave him floating, but he missed the softness and wanted to feel more of it.

Usagi smiled lovingly at him putting her hands back in her lap.

"Thank you, Mamo-chan. You're so nice and thoughtful. You've always cared so much about me… it makes me so happy you think that way."

Overcome with pride, he smiled back at her as the red in his cheeks only seemed to intensify. He liked how affectively she addressed him. 'Mamo-chan… I like it. It's cute; something someone like her would make up.'

He looked a bit down from her eyes and was once again distracted by those pink lips as if they demanded his attention. Her tongue slipped out to wet her lips, taunting him, and he felt himself gulp. If it felt so good just to have them touch his forehead, how must it feel to have them pressed against his own?

Before he could even analyze his actions beforehand his body began to move on its own accord. He got up from his kneeling position to propel himself forward pinning Usagi beneath him. Her back pressed against the back of the sofa as he came after her slowly. Mamoru planted his hands on both sides of the golden haired girl against the back of the couch caging her in; no escape.

He immensely enjoyed the ten shades of red her face took on and smirked. She gasped as she moved backwards parting the lips which he sought. Her eyes widened in pure surprise at his actions carefully watching what his next move would be. He was looking so intensely into her eyes he could tell she seemed to be heavily thinking about something.

Mamoru dipped downwards as his lids began to close. The only thing on his mind was connecting them together. His lips begged to be crashed into hers. He needed to know how they would feel against his, how they would move, and how they would taste. They were just a breath away before his lips made contact.

They landed on her cheek.

Perplexed, Mamoru moved back and saw that she had turned her head sideways. Already he could feel the dejection settle in the pit of his stomach and his face grew crestfallen. Usagi met his eyes with a sorrowful gaze trying to apologize without speaking.

'Wh… What happened? I-I was so close… I am so stupid! I can't believe I just tried to kiss her! My emotions got the best of me. I'm just a guy helping her out here; a newly made friend. I probably just ruined any chances of a dating relationship with her now. I should've built up to this moment more…'

"I… I'm sorry, Mamoru-kun… I really… really did want you to kiss me… but… I can't. I shouldn't. I don't deserve to," Usagi said with a tear trickling down her cheek.

Mamoru was pleased she had admitted she wanted him to do it, but it only made him that much more lost. He didn't understand at all. She was so happy and content when she kissed his forehead, but when he tried to do it she got almost in a state of depression.

What was going on in her mind? What changed?

"What are you talking about? Why not?" Mamoru repositioned himself so he wasn't over Usagi and took a seat right by her. He wiped the tears away as they fell, but new ones soon replaced them.

"I'm so… pathetic. I'm the worst, really I am! I have no right to kiss you when I took something so important from you! If… if we were together right now it wouldn't be a true relationship. I can't lie with you… not like this… not with your heart. You don't even remember anything…" She sobbed as he put him arm around her shoulders pulling her to his frame. Her head fell on his shoulder as she hid her face in her hands.

"I don't understand, Usagi."

"Exactly! And it's all my fault!"

Mamoru sighed and tried his best to comforting her. She was too worked up over something to clearly communicate the situation. That he did understand. He would ask her to make more sense of it later when she had calmed down.

He rubbed her arm soothingly up and down and rocked her hoping it would help even slightly. He wanted to comfort her in any way he could. She hiccupped a few times, but it seemed to be having the desired effect.

"I'm so sorry," she chanted again and again. He just smiled sorrowfully at her.

"It's okay, Usagi. It's okay."

"I do want to be with you," she confirmed.

"Then what's holding you back?"

"I just… need some time to think."

"How about you think about it over dinner with me tomorrow night?"

She seemed startled as she turned her head towards him. He gave Usagi a small smile as he ceased rubbing her arm and just held her.

"Mamoru-kun-"

"I don't know what's wrong or what you're thinking, but I do know that I really like you, Usagi. You say you have to think about it more; I'm fine with that. But I want to spend time with you, so please go out to dinner with me. You can think it over from now until then and give me your answer when you're ready. You can tell me what's keeping you away from me then, too."

Usagi stayed silent as she nodded, but that was enough for Mamoru. He thought all hope for a relationship was lost when he tried to kiss her, but he was getting another chance. He also got a date. Mamoru dropped down to lay a short kiss to her head and marveled how soft her hair was against his lips. He'd do it again, but this wasn't why he was there at the moment. He gazed over to the coffee table and set his eyes on his first-aid kit.

"Okay, I should get started. Lie down on your stomach, please." He stood up and reached over to it until he felt a light tug against his shirt. He looked back to her and that worried visage was back again.

"Um… could you get me a tissue, please? They're in the bathroom over there." She pointed towards a slightly open door while using the other hand to brush away the leftover tears. Mamoru nodded glad to be of service.

As he went to retrieve some tissues something glowing brightly by the window caught his attention. It was the beginning of the evening, so it couldn't have been sunlight. Perplexed, he turned his gaze towards the mystery and discovered several mystical, colorful roses made from something he couldn't quite describe. 'Is that sand? Sand doesn't sparkle like that though… what is this substance?'

One rose in particular stood out to him the most. It shinned a radiant gold with a silver stem and caught his eye immediately; the others paled in comparison to its splendor. It seemed to personally connect to him for some reason. It was so familiar, but he couldn't figure out why. One look was enough to capture his attention upon contact. The glowing promised something wonderful and was almost bursting with mysteriousness that drew him in like a fly to a light. It was gradually getting closer and closer to him… no, that wasn't it, he was walking towards the glowing vase full of beautiful rose look-alikes unknowingly.

Time seemed to slow down and he became slack-jawed as if hypnotized by the beautiful rose. His eyes began to lose focus and he was having trouble seeing the other things around him. The rose held such mystery, yet such a familiar nostalgia that couldn't be described. Whatever it was, it was calling to him, and he could do nothing but answer. It mimicked the call of a temptress who beckoned with sweet words while at the same time was pulling an invisible rope to drag him towards her. The closer Mamoru got the more he lost his focus until his vision swirled into incoherent nothingness.

He felt something trickle into his ear. It was grain-like and tickled on its journey to wherever it was heading. The sensation was soothing and he yearned to have more. Each step he took, more and more sand-like stuff entered his ear-canal.

Usagi calling out his name couldn't reach his ears as he outstretched his hand to take hold of the grand gold rose. This thing would fulfill him; he was sure of it.

ooOoo

'I'm the absolute worst,' Usagi realized as she thought back to their almost-kiss. Mamoru had just gotten up to fetch the tissues she requested to give her more time to think of an excuse for her wound. 'How come it didn't even occur to me how awful it was to try and pursue a relationship with him like this until we were about to kiss? It seemed to get clearer in my mind the closer he got. I… have absolutely no right to be with him.'

It all made sense to her now. A relationship with Mamoru without all of his memories was like tricking a guy with amnesia to fall in love. He didn't know anything about her anymore. Not her senshi life, not the bickering they used to do at the arcade, none of the happy memories they made together, not the Silver Millennium, nothing. And it was because of her. This wasn't right, and it took her until now to fully realize that.

'If we're going to be together then I have to give him his memories back… or else it's meaningless. But if I do that then he'll no doubt interfere with Nokemono… he might die again. I don't care how selfish that is, I can't let it happen. I wouldn't be able to continue living if anything happened to him.'

It was a dilemma that she would have to put in some serious thought, but she was going to set it aside for later. The most pressing problem was her wound which no longer existed. Deciding whether or not to give Mamoru back the rose could wait until later-

'The rose!!' she freaked putting a hand to her heart. It pounded vigorously beneath her fingertips. Today was just not her day. 'Oh my gosh, they're by the window and Mamoru-kun would have to pass near it to get to the bathroom! What if he sees them?!'

"Mamoru-kun!" Usagi shouted out doing a 180 from her position on the couch. She was just in time as she saw he had not yet reached his golden rose… but he was very close and closing in fast.

"…" He ignored her outburst as if it had never been said.

'No, I need to think more on this first. He can't get to that rose yet!' She jumped over the furniture and tripped her way over to him. Usagi placed herself in between them, but all it did was halt Mamoru's movements. His expression displayed a dull look in the eyes, a slacked jaw, and no interest to anything else. A hypnotized trance, as she knew he would take on when coming into vision of his old memories.

"Mamoru-kun? Mamoru-kun!" she repeated shaking him by the shoulders. It did nothing to change his state; he just stared back at her blankly.

"Move." His reply was said in a monotonic way as he used one hand to gently push her aside. She stepped back into place making sure there was distance between him and his goal. "That thing… it's important to me… I want more of it… No, I need more… Move."

Usagi bit her lip before an idea hit her.

"Luna! Artemis! Get over here now!!" she shouted. The pitter-patter of their paws crossing over the carpet could be heard as they rushed to her side.

"What's happening?" Artemis questioned.

"It's the rose!" Mamoru tried once again to move her aside, but she held her stance planting her feet into the ground. As the seconds went by he got more aggressive and she was starting to struggle. "It's his memories trapped in a physical form, and he's being drawn by it, but I can't let him get to it! I need you to get it somewhere out of sight, quick!!"

Luna nodded leaping up near the vase examining each color.

"Which one is it?!"

"The- ouch- gold one!" Mamoru gripped her arm a bit too harshly causing her to wince. With her strength she managed to push him back two feet and kept him there.

Luna gripped the rose loosely in her mouth and pulled it from its holder. The vase shook from the force wobbling in its spot, barely able to stay upright. Gazing down she let it glide below to Artemis who caught it with his teeth. As soon as it was in his possession the white feline began pacing the area seemingly not knowing what to do with it.

"The bathroom, put it in there!" Luna instructed. Usagi whipped around facing them with an appalled look on her face.

"It's his memories! They're precious and irreplaceable! Don't put them in the bathroom for heaven's sake!! Find some place else." Artemis started to pace more vigorously in circles. "Um, put it in my room. Get your furry butt moving!"

Nodding, he high-tailed it towards the door but stopped once he reached it.

"What's wrong now?"

"It's closed. Plus, Chibiusa's in there."

"She's sleeping! Who cares, just open it and place it somewhere she won't notice."

"I'm a cat, I can't even reach the doorknob!" he argued, although it was muffled due to the silver stem getting in the way.

"Well you better find a way or-"

Usagi was interrupted by the sound of her bedroom door squeaking. Startled, she let her guard down giving Mamoru ample time to sneak passed her. Seeing this, she once again regained a hold on him keeping him in place. Usagi's door opened swiftly with a pink haired girl popping out with an angry expression, bags under her eyes.

"How do you expect me to sleep with all of this racket?!" she asked rhetorically. "Keep it down, will you?" She made a move to close the door until she noticed the ebony haired man struggling against her hostess. Wide eyed she pointed towards the male. "That's him…"

"Chibiusa-chan, I have no time to tell you what's going on right now. Just please take that rose out of Artemis's mouth and hide it in my room. Now!" Usagi shouted.

Chibiusa stared at it for a moment, but when she made no attempt to grab for the sparkling flower Artemis nudged at her legs urging her to hurry. Breaking out of her train of thought she leaned down, grasped it in her hand, and petted him on the head on the way up. Swiftly, she made a turnaround and held the handle of the door, but gave one last look to Usagi.

"You should give this back to him." And she went back inside, most likely to continue snoozing.

'How is it that she seems to know everything?!'

When Mamoru's glowing, mystical rose was out of sight his trance almost ceased at once. He would've fallen onto the ground if Usagi wasn't by his side and ready to hold him up. With a man slouched over her shoulder she transported them both back towards the couch and made it so they were both sitting down. His eyes had closed and his manor led her to believe he passed out after the little episode.

"That was close," Usagi whispered in relief unleashing a stress-filled sigh. Luna jumped up there with them while Artemis chose to jump up onto the coffee table.

"She's right you now," Luna spoke softly. "It isn't right to keep something like that from him. It's his and no one else's."

"Luna," Artemis warned. The black feline looked over at him and saw her friend making a head movement towards their princess. Once she saw Usagi's expression she didn't say anything else and put a paw on her lap.

'I know that… I know that, but…'

"Hmm…" Mamoru stirred from his short slumber, eyes blinking rapidly trying to make sense of what was happening as he let out a groan. He licked his lips turning his head form side to side sweeping the room with his gaze before settling her eyes on the golden haired girl beside him. Luna and Artemis returned to their normal cat phases. "What happened?"

Usagi bit her lower lip again looking away from him. She spotted his medical kit next to Artemis's swaying tail and grinned slightly. This would work out perfectly.

"I'm not sure. Right after you patched me up you just sort of fainted. You looked so tired, have you been up all night?" she questioned, knowing from the past he often forgot to watch out for himself when it came to studying. His eyes widened.

"Yeah, I was studying for a medical test I have tomorrow… I really passed out? I don't remember anything." He placed a hand to his head as if the gesture would help him recall something which never happened.

"It was so sudden, it really shocked me. You need to take better care of yourself, you know," she joked swatting at his arm. He laughed and ran his hand through his tresses.

"I guess. So, you're all right? You said I checked you, how was your wound? What did I say about it?"

"Well… you said it was still pretty bad, but more time and not too much stretching then it would be healed in no time. It won't even leave scars!" 'Ha ha, lucky break! I'm getting out of this! Usagi, my girl, you're a genius.'

"No scars?" He sounded baffled. "Really?! Let me see it again-"

"No! You, uh, already patched it back up again. Besides, you just said you had an important test coming up tomorrow; you need your sleep! I don't want you to pass out again, that's not very manly; bad for your rep. You need to eat healthily and definitely get a lot of sleep. That's very important. I don't think you'll remember that, I should write it down for you." He chuckled.

"Are you saying I don't know how to take care of myself?"

"Maybe." She slyly smiled.

"Maybe you should take care of me then," he grinned roguishly making a move to stand up.

"Well, maybe I should. You obviously can't handle the task on your own."

"I'd like that," he said smiling gently down at her. Usagi blushed and gave a light giggle getting up as well to see him out. He made a grab for his medical kit and headed towards the door.

"Thanks for coming… even though I told you I was fine," she joked mimicking a complaining child.

"It was no problem." Before he opened the door he shyly cast a glance her way, coughing into his hand. "Will you still join me for dinner tomorrow? It'd make me very happy." He walked over to her and grabbed her hand gazing into her eyes. "I also want to know… what's bothering you."

"Of course. I hope by then I'll be able to tell you," she confessed, her face heating up as he ran his thumb over her knuckles. He grinned.

"I'll pick you up at 6:30. Until then…" His speech drifted off as he lifted her hand to his face and landed a soft peck where his thumb was massaging. She gave him a bright smile as he closed the door behind him, and then frowned when he was no longer in sight.

She had a lot of thinking to do. It seemed as the hours went by more and more weight was being added to her list of things to ponder over. Decisions had to be made, and if her choices weren't right, then more than one person was going to be hurt. There was the old senshi, Chibiusa, Nokemono, Mamoru… she didn't know what to do anymore.

But after a good night's sleep and some daydreaming in class, Usagi was sure things were going turn out for the best.

Before she could speak to the two cats and prepare herself some late-night dinner, a far-off scream could be heard in the distance. Usagi groaned, dropping her shoulders in annoyance. 'Is today never going to end?'

"Usagi-chan!" Luna urged.

"Yeah, Luna, I know. I know," she sighed already in the middle of transforming.

There was too much to think about and not enough time to do it.