All for Me, to Me, You Sue
Chapter 6: Excuse the Excuses

I mumbled violently under my breath as I practically threw myself onto my seat next to him the next morning in English.

"Ah, I see you've delighted in them," the purpose of my wretched morning oh-so handsomely said as he handsomely smiled next to me. How very tempting that I break that face so that I may talk with him eye-to-eye – ordinary-girl-to-ordinary-boy – without forfeiting my frustration.

"Incurably," I barked in a hushed, sarcastic tone.

"What, you didn't like them? They were only flowers, Bella, not piranhas, though I suppose for a girl like you, those would have been more suitable," he kindly added.

I glared at him in response, thinking that was more than enough to express my mix of emotions toward his demeaning behavior.

"God, you're adorable when you glare," he smiled – all too affably.

"Ugh," I groaned, burying my face in the fold of my arms on the table, "God, leave me alone."

He snickered next to me and I dared take a peek at him – Damn these weak, impoverished, captivated, only-human eyes. His hand was balled into a loose fist, his elbow on the table as he touched his knuckles to his nose. A subdued chuckle still lingered around the curve of his lips, which bore their own, unique shade of pink. I once again lost myself in the sight of his features – it wasn't something you walk by to and find the will to continue walking, or at least, without successfully stumbling, hitting a lamp post or, you know, divorcing your husband and things like that. He was stunning, glorified by the consummate addition of his youthful charm. No doubt he's a prick, but somewhere deep within his eyes were mirrors to a thousand emotions, the biggest of which was his obvious perspective on life. His eyes spared him no lies, and yet innumerable secrets still loomed from deep within. That might be the cause to his second biggest: fear. I am still completely darkened by that one, however, and it seemed like he's trained his defense – that cheerful oblivion – well against those that may perhaps trigger it. The third was perhaps my favorite – warmth. Whenever he smiles, this was the force that enabled his eyes to smile with him. Whenever he talks, this was the passion that allowed for others to relate to him. This was perhaps what entangled me in his cobweb of emotions, in spite of his irritable nature. And that was only his eyes.

I didn't have time to obsess over every, faultless feature – they were all exactly that, faultless – what more can one say? – because he typically brought me back to reality with an easy remark.

"I think you're beautiful, too, Bella," he smiled teasingly.

I blushed, unable to control it, and smacked myself upside the head for it inwardly. How could I have let myself stare? Eyelids, hello? I could have cared less if I sat there, my head in his direction, so intent and so still, but with my eyes closed – if that was what it would take for me to have been spared out of this consequence. Biting my lip to keep from throwing a grenade of profanities, I tried to calm myself down. The guy was impossible! How could someone be so—so—?

"And when you smile – the rare times that you do – it really makes me feel like everything's going to be okay, like when the sun rises each morning… you know you're still alive, able to live another day," he almost merely breathed everything by how low and how gently he was speaking. He glanced up at my face – I can't imagine how I looked like, but I know this euthermic rush of such delicate feelings caressing my body most likely didn't deliver a demonic expression – and looked away almost immediately right after. I barely caught the glance itself. "Cause, well, you know, since you're so stingy about everything – I just figured something can't be so bad if you're smiling about it. Then again, you're kind of weird, too. So just—," he sighed and I knew he didn't intend to continue anymore. It took me a moment before I realized my eyes were still picking on him, so I shook them away with a bit of a struggle and I felt him ease up next to me.

So sweet, I inwardly finished my previous thoughts.

"Don't think you're fooling me," Jessica said against my ear.

It didn't take a lot to understand the mechanics of Jessica's mind. Everything about her was forward, no complications attached, so it was easy to guess what she'd meant. But that wasn't to say she's always correct. I peered at the board, leaning my face closer to my work as though to emphasize my focus.

"Oh, please, oh, please, won't you tell me?" she entreated, her voice low for the sake of the teacher, though her purpose was leaking from her eyes, screaming at her – at me.

"But there's not much to say," I admitted hesitantly. I honestly did not need more reminder about my growing fondness with Callum than I was already queasily aware. Deep down, I didn't want to admit it; I don't want to accept it. All those times I've spent cowering from the thought of it – of anything as amatory – only to be enamored by someone I've barely met, however different he was.

"Not much," she repeated and there was a challenge in her tone, "You like him, and you know it. And I know it, so won't you just admit it?"

"If you're so convinced, why the need to ask?"

"It's been so long, Bella – so long since you've gained color in your cheeks. You're always grumpy, but give me a little more credit, will you? I think it's safe to say I know you more than that – and that you're not much of a liar," she giggled. "So, please – pretty please?"

And, of course, she was right. If there should be anybody who notices that, it would have been Jessica. She was definitely the most observant when it comes to things like this, but more than that, she was a true friend, who truly cares. How could I possibly deny her any part of me when she asked for it, after all she's done for me?

I leaned toward her and she automatically drew closer to me, grinning happily at her success at making me so hopeless.

"A dozen roses so far, red and white."

She clasped her hand against her mouth to keep from squealing.

"Oh, Jess, I don't know how to feel. He confuses me… By making me feel so good, he confuses me," I spilled and from there, I knew I won't be able to stop. Jess knew this, too, and with a second to spare, she grabbed my hand, pulled me out of my seat, and scampered through the rows of desks and out the door after yelling a quick excuse to the teacher. It sounded something like, "It's an emergency. Blame's on me later!" but I couldn't be sure as I plunged into her open arms, my tears flying freely now.

She hushed me quietly, gently patting my head like a mother does when her daughter comes home with a broken heart.

"It hurts so much… God, it hurt so much," I whimpered. "It still—I still—," I struggled to let my words fade with each tear – with time – not wanting to hear the words that my heart can't deny.

I wrestled my way through the next set of periods before lunchtime finally came. I needed the company of friends, and when I needed friends, I really needed friends. A big fuss over Dylan and Stephanie – who are now officially at a couple's price for the dance – was at its climax when I arrived. Mike was whining, muttering something unnecessary as he pulled out his wallet. Tyler was laughing hysterically as Jessica grinned proudly. Lauren was giggling, too – sometimes I'm surprised by the way she was even capable of doing so, when she always gave me such a hard time – while Austin and Eric chuckled lightly along. Angela and Ben were giggling, too, with Ben's arms wrapped around her, her back to his chest. And then there was Callum, whose eyes I didn't miss, even when they turned quickly away from me the moment my eyes encountered them. But that was enough. Within that tiny second, I recognized the fiery, warm swirls deep within the physical magnificence of his eyes with what seemed to me like a fleck of concern.

"Callum!"

What was I doing? Have I lost my mind by coming here?

"Hey, wait up," my mouth continued to call. I'll have to remember to purchase some stitches, a zipper, and a humongous lock for it later. Oh, and a voice-activated code – let's see if it gets itself out of that one.

He paused and turned around to face me just as he was unlocking the door to his driver's seat. At first, he looked surprise but as soon as he caught sight of me, he quickly smirked, amusement crystallized in his eyes.

"Had a change of heart?" he asked nicely. By the tone of his voice, I can already guess that he knew my answer.

"Dream on," I replied.

"Then why are you stalking me for?"

"I followed you to the parking lot – that's hardly stalking."

"Spare your excuses for someone who minds being stalked by you," he smiled teasingly.

Why I ought to—

I rolled my eyes at him. "Hey, look, uh… What's bothering you?"

His eyes widened for a split second in surprise, another split second in what looked like sadness, before settling for amusement. It was hard to tell whether that acted as a mask for another kind of emotion, just as it is to figure out Callum altogether. There was something dark about him. Not necessarily evil, but still very mysterious. Had I been any other teenage girl and not being as, well, as abnormal as I am, I'd have defined it as – what's the word – sexy.

After lunch that afternoon, he walked with us routinely, but he was abnormally quiet – for him, anyway. Even in class the next period, he only stared outside the icy windows just as he had that first day he came back here to Forks. Came back. For some reason, it was still difficult to register that Callum had lived in Forks once before. I'm surprised Charlie was so in the dark about it. I'll have to remember to ask him about it later – maybe he'd remembered something by now.

"How long have you been looking at me to assume that?" he asked, his eyes finely entertained.

"Just forget it," I gave up, twisting around to walk away. I knew it – this had been such a bad idea. What was it to me had anything really bothered him? As far as I know, he bothers me, so this should have been out of the question. Fool, I told myself.

"Wait." And then a gentle, cold grip was upon my wrist. I turned my head to glance back at him, but even before I could, he somehow managed to pull me back in such a swift manner – I barely felt any movement until I realized that my back was against the side of his car. He hovered in front of me, his tall frame managing about a foot above my head. Though he left some open space between us, my stomach was still imbued with such a pleasant, fluttering feeling. I mentally tried to count how many times this boy had made me wish I was dead. Suddenly, I felt him trembling. It was so rigorous that you'd hardly notice he was if you weren't touching him. His eyes illustrated an endeavor that seemed to be proving laborious for him as he ogled down at me. It even looked as though his very eyes were trembling with the rest of his body.

"Callum," I whispered, my voice crooked and unsure.

He jumped slightly as though I'd just yelled at his ear from behind. But I whispered, here in front of him. With a single blink of an eye, he completely ceased to tremble and a deep, magenta blush sped to occupy his cheeks. He turned his face away from me completely, though his hand still held my wrist.

"I'm sorry…," he muttered.

"It's okay. I mean, it's fine, don't worry about it," I replied, almost too quickly. Nothing felt quite right. I wasn't used to this about him. He was often so certain about every word and every movement he spared. I waited to feel unease, but it never came. In its place was a flood of concern instead, like all I wanted was to assure him – make sure he's alright. And then I remembered…

I dusted myself off of all insecurities and polished my smile. I was surprised to find it didn't take as much effort as I'd calculated. It felt so natural to smile at him. I leaned my face marginally in front of him so that he may better catch my performance – darn fool better notice; I'm not doing this for nothing.

Finally, he shifted his eyes toward me. They were almost blank, except for a hint of surprise. Slowly – but worthwhile – his smile began to mirror mine, only his was flawless where mine was probably just a poor excuse for a smile. Just like that, I suddenly felt so silly for taking his word this morning. My smile couldn't possibly compare to the morning sun – what was I thinking? What was he thinking?

"You're so silly," he confirmed, now repressing a chuckle.

My smile faded as I snorted at him angrily. "And what are you? Appreciative, I see."

"No, no," he said quickly, "I am. Bella, honestly, thank you. That was just far from what I would have expected for you to do, to be honest."

Trust me, buddy, you weren't the only one who didn't expect that from me.

"Yeah, well," I scolded the blush I felt sneaking up on my cheeks, "Whatever."

He chuckled now and I felt his heart echoing with it. "Nevertheless, I'm afraid now I must have to recant my former belief; you aren't as enclosed as you let on, at least not so naturally."

"Of course not," I defended, "You're just special."

"In which way that you feel necessitated to be a bitch toward me?"

I grinned, "Aren't you bright?"

"Ah, a compliment to be cherished from you, Miss Swan," he bowed as though I've just given him pledge as a knight, smiling that indefectible smile.

I allowed a small laugh to escape my lips at his inanity. I noted a twinkle of amenity flash in his eyes as I did so, but perhaps my possessed mind was only inventing such extreme fantasies.

"Bella, would you like to grab something to drink with me?"

This set off guard, but I shouldn't have been so surprised – Callum was a master at that.

"Sure."

That completely set me off guard – no questions, no excuses.

"Alright," he enthused with a sweet smile, "Come on. Your choice or mine, I could go either way."

"You seem to have a knack at choices, so I'll honor you with the choice. But, Callum," I glanced down at our linked hands – with his able to circle around my wrist completely, just as it was doing exactly.

He followed my eyes and blushed, quickly letting me go. "I'm sorry," he murmured, "I didn't notice."

"That's fine," I replied, but my voice cracked slightly at the end, surprised when I realized how I missed the strange warmth his shivery hands provided me with.

"So," he began once we're fixated in his car, "Entertain me. How did you ever arrive at the conclusion that something was bothering me all of a sudden?"

"No."

"No?" He laughed, "What do you mean, no?"

"I mean, no, I'm not going to entertain you with an answer."

"Why not?" he sounded too amused to sound hurt, like he was trying to sound.

"Because," I hesitated, "It's embarrassing."

"Mm, entertain me even more," he grinned, his eyes watching the road ahead of him.

"Callum," I groaned. He was being so difficult, as always. Persistent and as irresistible as he was, what made him think I'll succumb to satisfying his every curiosity? "No."

"Fine," he paused for a while before continuing, "But you were right."

I turned my head in his direction, my eyes enlarged with surprise at his confession. "Really?"

He nodded, looking as though he was biting his bottom lip from the inside of his mouth.

"Tell me why," I encouraged.

"No."

"Why not?"

He chuckled. "How has our previous conversation been reversed?"

A part of me knew that he asked purely to avoid the subject and distract me. Then I remembered what he had given me once: time. If it's his turn to require it, then he shall receive it from me. I simply smiled, letting it go as I giggled with him.

I laughed devoutly, reverberating throughout the vacuous room. Callum had taken me to Café Renée once more, which I'm silently thankful for. The place was even more vacant – therefore much quieter – in the afternoon, just the way I prefer it to be.

"Since you're so stingy about so many things, I thought I'd play it safe and bring you back here," he'd commented when we first arrived. I rolled my eyes, but otherwise smiled at him for the consideration toward my well-being.

"I don't believe you," I managed through hysterics now as we sat across from each other in our usual spot that previous Saturday.

"Because that's the absolute last thing I'd want you to do at my most embarrassing moment – distrust me," he said sarcastically, but neither of us had been able to wipe the smiles off our faces ever since we got into the topic of "our most … moments."

"I can't believe that that had been your most embarrassing moment. I'd barely noticed that you were dancing before you caught me through my side mirror," I reasoned.

"But it really was. Stop," he groaned as I continued to laugh, though he was repressing a chuckle of his own. The more I thought of that day when he'd escorted me home to drop off my truck at my house before going down to Port Angeles, the more I was unable to stop myself from rounding another set of laughter.

"Alright," he moved on, quickly for his sake, "How about this: the happiest moment of your life."

I felt my smile wither at the easiest, most difficult question I could ever answer. Something in my expression must have triggered a rapid understanding in him, because he suddenly gained a panicked expression – as panicked as his acutely perfected face could possibly manage – and began stumbling with his words.

"You know what, that's too typical and lame and stupid. How about, uh—"

"When Edward first told me he loved me." I smiled weakly at him in reassurance, knowing my eyes would give me away nevertheless, but still hoping it wouldn't.

"Bella…"

"It's alright, Callum," I strengthened my smile as much as I can, "It's all in the past."

"Perhaps… you're right…"

"What is it?" He looked as though he was struggling from adding something to his statement.

"No, it's nothing. I know it's such a typical thing to say, but," he peered at me, emphasizing every word he said after that with his flawless, golden twin suns, "he's missing out on such a precious girl."

I stared at him in amazement – or was it disbelief. His words bury such a deep hole somewhere in my chest, but instead of leaving it void, their meaning only flood it with such warm, extraordinary sensations. I wanted nothing more than to believe them – nothing more. His words felt so good, and his voice holds no crime. As impossible as they were – as much as I wanted to deny it and as much as I would have normally drove such words away without difficulty – he somehow emptied me of my defenses and had me accepting his words without my conscious permission. He made me feel… precious, indeed.

"Thank you for yet another eventful cup of tea," I voiced softly as we stopped by at the school parking lot where my gallant truck awaits. I wasn't surprised when it started raining heavily on our way back, for the sky's darkened shade veiled no secrets. It was only a matter of waiting for it throughout the day. Though it was well calefacient within his car, I knew it would only take a few seconds outside to make a giant ice cube out of me.

"You're welcome. As it was for me," he smiled, a factor that put his vehicle's heater to shame any day, anytime.

"Though you took it back for me, I'm beginning to think you're the one who's enclosed, Callum Chandler," I stated as I grinned at him confidently.

"Oh?" he smirked in amused curiosity. "And why is that?"

"There are such contradicting qualities about you. You're so elegant – deep – and also mysterious, but there are the more obvious ones when you're being immature, cruel, and utterly frustrating."

He laughed and it seemed to serve as music to the dancing beat of my heart. "Well, when you put it that way, I guess. Okay, I suppose that's understandably odd."

"And strangely, I like it," I admitted. He turned toward me, his eyes slightly dilated with surprise. "What?" I defended, "Since we've been so honest, anyway…"

And then his eyes slowly narrowed into deep, almond shapes that sheltered a lone emotion: warmth – my favorite. He didn't smile, but he didn't frown, either. It was an altogether pleasant sight, one that I can scan all day for any sort of flaw – however tiny – no matter how well I knew that it would have been futile.

"Well," I started when he didn't say anything after a while, "I might as well throw myself out there now before the rain becomes heavier – if that's possible." I allowed a fragment of a giggle to slide off my lips before opening the car door, but before I could even take a single step outside, Callum was by the door, his right hand serving as a brim above his forehead while his left reached out for mine. The shock of his agility subsided as I forfeited my hand in his, remembering how he's done it before – the guy was fast; big deal. His frosty hand sent suspicious splinters of heat to trickle against my hand as he began walking me over to my truck.

"Thank you," I mumbled, but as I tried to pull my hand from his, I found that his was firm against mine. And that was when I found his eyes just as firm against my own. The expression in his eyes hasn't changed since I admitted my strange fondness toward his odd personality in his car, except that they were more… intense, I think would be the right word for it. We were merely a foot apart, and once again, I found myself wondering if he was battling against something within himself as I felt his wild trembling. Perhaps it was the icy droplets that now marinated us angrily. All the same, my heart still reacted as violently at his gaze, his yellow eyes glowing in the shadows of the night. I was wholly captivated.

And so my growing desire – if it could possibly be – preempted all reasoning as I closed the distance between our blue and frigid lips. My free arm laid limp at my side as I silently took comfort in his hold against my other one. I hadn't noticed if I'd closed my eyes or if the dark had actually been that deep before, but I didn't care if I see anything or not, so long as I could continue to feel his lips against mine. And after a moment too long, he finally released my hand, strangling my waist with both his hands instead. He drew me closer by my hips, and I only too gladly – too eagerly – eliminated the remaining distance between us with a single step forward. My hands numbly hung themselves on his shoulders, and I held onto him as Callum pressed his lips acceptingly against mine.

Monstrous drops of rain, frozen winds, and the blackened skies hid the crime to which my heart was so pleasantly guilty.

YOUUU GUUYS. I'm just beyond words with my happiness right now. Not only was I able to keep my goal and present you guys with CHAPTER SIX, but I also recieved the most reviews I've gotten so far within a chapter. I know it's not much, but it's something, and I am writing this for my own sake, as well - I love writing. I'm only so happy to know that you guys enjoy it, too. Oh, and a special thanks to Pontas-Metallika You made my day. That was so long, so sweet, touching, and all of the above, and informative. I didn't know anonymous reviews were disabled on my account, so thank you for that. :) We're gradually moving throughout this week, but I'm really doing my best to come up with as many chapters before they dismantle my computer from the house, so... I hope you guys don't give up on me, because I'm far from giving up on you guys! Ex's and Oh's - handwritten