World of Warcraft: The Wandrings of Zach (and Co.)
Written By: Wyatt Clark
Co-Written By: Zachary Bearg and 911GuiltyJerk (AKA Tom)
Assistance By: Hunter Clark
(WARNING: Story contains violence, language (the more offensive words censored), usage of alcohol and drugs (to some extent), and some minor adult themes)
Disclaimer: This chapter was written by These Three Jerks Productions. World of Warcraft, along with its characters, locations, and elements, are property of Blizzard Entertainment. We are a non-profit writing team who intends not to sell works copyrighted by their respective companies, but borrow elements from them to entertain others in the form of our works.
Chapter 4: Skirmish
The group debated over staying and getting supplies or just going off and killing everything they find. After much debating they decided to supply themselves before heading out the find the Shadow Queen. Hunter had equipped himself with a steel breastplate, a helmet, and a comically huge, two-handed hammer. Tom took another breastplate, no helmet, and instead of a hammer, took a simple flanged mace, as well as an iron shield. Kieth had shazamed back to join their party. This time, Kieth was wearing a pair of cotton pants, leather boots, leather gloves, and a studded leather vest--all black in color. As for weapons he sported a bow, a quiver of several arrows, and a dagger (This layout was similar to Wyatt's except that Wyatt had a sort of Dwarven muzzle loader called a "blunderbuss").
Soon after Kieth returned they left to go on their 'glorious quest'. They traveled past the path Zach had taken, past Potshire, and went down into the forest heading towards the next town, Moonbrook. The trip went smoothly until they came upon a rather large camp of Kobold miners. The hid behind brush from several yards away to form up a strategy.
"I count about twelve Kobold; eleven normal ones and one geomancer." Wyatt stated in a worried tone.
"Oh, so that's what those things are." Zach said, remembering the Kobolds in World of Warcraft when he watched Tom and Wyatt play it.
"Be quiet!" Hunter urged Zach. "Now, I say that Wyatt and Kieth should distract the things with their ranged arsenal while Zach charges at the heathens with his sword, while me and Tom come up and club them with our mallets and such!"
There were no objections to this plan. Everybody moved slowly and quietly into position, thankful that Kobolds were so stupid. After about ten minutes of moving and hiding, Kieth and Wyatt were hidden by some dense underbrush, with the rest of the group waiting up behind some trees, weapons ready.
Wyatt gave a count down, when Wyatt yelled "Now!" Kieth and Wyatt opened fire on the Kobold. Kieth got a lucky shot and hit one of the kobold in the mouth, while Wyatt's shots seemed to miss the target but get some other Kobold. When the rat-like creatures recovered from the confusion, and realized where the shots were coming from they charged at the no longer hidden pair of snipers. Once they had almost reached Kieth and Wyatt's hiding spot, Zach and Tom jumped at them from behind their cover. Tom knocked a Kobold's head off, and Zach chopped another one's head off. Meanwhile Hunter came charging up and smashed several of the creatures into gooey, blood-gushing pancakes. Zach parried the slash of a Kobold and kicked the huge rat in the face, effectively breaking its neck and causing blood to gush out of its mouth as it fell on the ground dead.
Just as the battle was looking up a blast of molten rock had hit Wyatt's shin, he emitted a loud, piercing cry that made everything on the battle field pause. Hunter turned and saw the geomancer's hands glowing; he picked up a large rock and threw it at the ugly rat creature, breaking the creature's right leg. This action was too late as yet another chunk of magma was sent flying from the geomancer's hands, this time hitting Tom's left arm. During this chaos that had Zach stunned, a Kobold miner took his pick and put a nail sized hole in Zach's boot. Luckily, it only hit between his toes, so Zach was only alarmed by it. He then promptly dropped his shield, pried the pick out with his sword, grabbed the Kobold by the throat, lifted it into the air, and then slammed it into the ground. The 'chokeslam' broke a few bones in the Kobold, but it was still breathing; Zach made sure it wouldn't breathe again by stabbing it in the heart with his sword, finishing it off and then picking his shield back up.
Hunter swung at the geomancer, but it was a bit too agile, despite its broken leg. The geomancer's hands glowed again, and Hunter braced for pain, but then an arrow hit the Kobold in the throat and a gun shot rang out. The Kobold fell dead, a hole in its chest and an arrow in its throat.
Hunter turned and saw Wyatt with a smoking rifle. Zach and Kieth mopped up while Hunter looted the already dead Kobold. Tom patched up his own arm with some linen bandages made from cloth which had been appropriated from some of the Kobold, and then he patched up Wyatt. After moving the bodies away, the group prepared to camp out for the night.