AN: I think I am setting my own record for frequency of updates.

Part 18

Her chin jutted out and she met his gaze with a glare of her own. Chuck's eyes narrowed as she turned away and looked around her. Easily, she spotted her former fiancé and placed a hand on his arm. For his part, Nathaniel Archibald's somber face melted into a welcoming smile upon recognizing who it was.

Lord Nathaniel bowed before her and offered his hand. Blair stepped into his arms and allowed Nathaniel to whirl her around the room. As the glided, Chuck could see the fans that fanned quicker, hear the tongues that wagged faster, feel the eyes that grew sharper.

Behind him, he heard the familiar voices of his father and the duchess. But he could not turn around to manage a proper greeting. Instead he was captivated by the sight of Lady Blair in a scandalous waltz with a man who was no longer her fiancé. Nathaniel's hand was on the small of her back, and she was pressed against him so closely it was as if she was on a Parisian floor rather than London's more pretentiously conservative one.

"Look at them, darling," he heard Anne Archibald's voice. So Nathaniel's parents had once again arrived with Chuck's family. Chuck disliked the connection, but his father was always in control. Lady Anne continued, "Remember when they were children and little Nathaniel kissed her hand? Lady Blair blushed to the roots of her hair, and they were so beautiful together." She gave an audible sigh. "All that perfection going to waste."

It was Lilly who responded. "Nathaniel and Serena look even more perfect together, Lady Anne. I wonder where my daughter is."

Anne huffed. "I have seen them together. They appear stiff and uncomfortable still."

"That is because they are newly betrothed, sweetheart," the admiral offered.

Chuck smirked. If even the admiral, as absorbed as he was with himself, could notice that neither Serena nor Nate was happy with the match, then it was more than apparent.

And it was Anne's voice again, so sickeningly saccharine that Chuck wanted to just walk away. "It is just so humiliating to have to hear Lady Blair announced tonight with your son. I had always imagined her introduction to London society, and she was always with Nathaniel."

"Let it rest, Anne," the admiral warned.

"I just cannot believe that you put your honor on the line to cover up the mess," Anne confided in a whisper. "Only to have it be for naught."

Bartholomew cleared his throat. "I have offered you're my stepdaughter and more money than you can hope to get elsewhere," he said, his voice hard.

"You are right," Anne capitulated. "And a duel for a woman's hand, no matter how illegal, is still very rational, your grace."

Chuck stiffened at the words, because he had never asked how it was that his father came to kill Harold Waldorf. He frowned. His father had brought Lilly home after his last trip to France. Three years ago. He had been in a dark mood for months, and Lilly had stayed close throughout. It was during one vacation from school that Chuck learned about his new stepmother and stepsiblings. Eric had not yet been sent to boarding school, but the boy had spoken perfect French for a Dutch heir.

"All I am saying is that if Serena and Nathaniel cannot make this engagement last, then we should consider that Lady Blair does not seem opposed to my son. They do have a long history."

Chuck's gritted his teeth and shoved his father's problems away from his head. The duke had to exorcise his own demons, and Chuck needed to stake a claim on his own life before Nathaniel could try. He saw a glimpse of Blair's white throat as she threw back her head to laugh at something that his best friend shared. He stalked over to where the two paused in their dance.

He stepped close to Blair and hissed, "Stop. You are providing fodder for rumor mongers."

Her laughter faded, and she set her jaw, then turned her back on him. She looked up at Nathaniel and said, "Will you take me out for some air, my lord?"

Nathaniel nodded. "Certainly."

Without pausing for consideration, Chuck laid a hand on Nathaniel's shoulder and jerked him back. Nathaniel stumbled back, eliciting a gasp from the people surrounding them. Blair looked around and then glared at Chuck, shaking her head.

Chuck bared his teeth at his friend, then turned to Blair. "We are going home," he stated.

"Wait." Nathaniel looked at the girl who used to be his intended. "Is this what you want, my lady?"

Chuck's hand fisted. Blair nodded. She placed a calming hand on his arm, but did not look at him. Inside the carriage on their way home, Chuck said quietly. "There is something we need to discuss."

She looked out the window. "I am too exhausted to speak with you," she said, her voice cold.

~o~o~o~o~o~

Blair woke in her bed and felt something heavy on her stomach. She opened her eyes and saw the heavy arm around her middle. She moved her body and found herself limited by the presence of a body pressed up behind her.

"Chuck," she said softly.

She lifted his hand off her and climbed out of the bed. She remained quiet as she changed quickly. She did not wish to wait for Dorota, because there was no desire within her at that moment to speak with Chuck. If there was any noise, he was sure to wake and ask for a discussion. She suspected it was why he slept in her bed when he was mostly firm about sleeping apart until the wedding.

"Tomorrow," Blair realized. They were to be married tomorrow and she was uncertain now. She padded out of the room in a simple morning smock.

"Lady Blair."

She turned and saw the older woman, Serena's grandmother, sitting in the balcony with tea and scones. "Lady Rhodes, good morning."

"Come, my dear," Cece invited. "I fear I have been so busy chaperoning my granddaughter that I have neglected you."

Blair shook her head. "There was no need." She settled into the seat across from Cece.

"Well, I know how nervous you must be for tomorrow."

Blair shook her head. "Not at all. Lord Charles has been everything that I had hoped for," she lied. There were many things that she and Chuck needed to settle, but it would not be done by an old lady from the ton who was here more for Serena. Blair and Chuck took care of their own concerns, settled their own issues, solved their own problems. Nobody else had business with theirs.

"Have something to eat then," Cece urged her. "My, my. You are a tad too slender, dear. You will need to have a healthier constitution if you are to bear Lord Charles' children." Blair gave the older woman a tight smile. "And you will. He will expect a male heir as soon as possible, and then a second son. There should always be a second son, especially for a duchy."

Blair's hand involuntarily went to her belly. "Chuck has no brother."

Cece sipped her tea. Her face took on a dreamy expression as she remembered. "That is an exception. I remember those days. Bartholomew was a hothead when he fell in love with Misty." Blair's lips parted. Stories such as there were hard to come by, and she should have known that Serena's grandmother would have many of them in store. She had been in society long before Lilly married a Dutch businessman. "He was head over heels, with his heart on his sleeve. Very much unlike the somber man he is these days."

Blair could not imagine the rough spoken duke as the brazen young man Cece described. Cece smiled at the memory. "He loved that woman." Cece regarded the French girl in front of her. "Come to think of it, she looked a little like you. When she was carrying Charles, Bartholomew treated her like a fragile princess."

"What happened?" Blair asked quietly, knowing the story would not end well. If it did, Lilly would not be the duchess.

Cece sighed. "Bass men are larger than life," she shared, and Blair agreed. "Bass children are havoc on a woman's body, my dear. That is why I am advising you. Build up your constitution."

"Do you mean—"

"Misty died giving birth to Charles," Cece told her. "She had not been much smaller than you are, dear." She handed the plate of scones to Blair, who took one and bit into it.

"He did not wed again until the duchess?"

"For a long time, the duke was unwilling to consider another woman. Until Lilly," was the answer. "Now," Cece decided, "given that your mother is not here, I believe the responsibility falls on me to speak with you about your wedding night."

"Lady Rhodes," Blair stammered, "I do not think we should."

"But, my dear, you cannot go off on your first night with Lord Charles and not know what to expect."

"Lord Charles is a good teacher," Blair blurted out. Stories were fine to hear from Serena's grandmother, but Blair did not need the old woman to describe the act to her. "He taught me to play chess," Blair added for clarification.

Cece's eyebrows furrowed. "Are you certain? I would feel inept if you are shocked or fearful when he goes to your bed."

"Lady Rhodes, truly," Blair insisted.

"Then perhaps we should talk about last night," Cece told her. "Many people are talking about Lord Charles and Lord Nathaniel's small scuffle." Blair shook her head. "Is it about his mistress?" When Blair gasped in surprise, Cece smiled and nodded. "Young people always think that the older ones know nothing of their affairs. My dear, it is one of those things you must accept. Most all noblemen have mistresses."

Blair moistened her lips. "So they say," she whispered. Blair did not elaborate. Those words were reserved for only one person. "I have to go."

She made her way back to her bedroom and found Chuck still sleep in her bed. Blair walked over to the end of the room and looked out the window. There were a few people already walking out in the morning sun. A couple of carriages drove by. Out there, the world continued to live its life. In her room, with Chuck asleep, it was as if everything was on pause.

She felt him before she saw him. He aligned his body against hers as he wrapped his arms around her from behind. He placed a kiss on the crook of her neck. Blair's eyes closed, and felt herself start to cry.

"I am losing my mind," he rasped against her skin. "I cannot bear that you are hurting, my love."

She sniffled, but did not turn around to face him. "I know it is accepted in your world, my lord. It is the same in mine. But I cannot accept another woman in our lives," she confessed. "But if I should lose you over this—"

"Never," he swore.

"Maybe I can live with it," she said softly. "As long you come home to me every night." Blair closed her eyes, then shook her head. "I can't," she exclaimed. "It does not make me a good wife, but I cannot live like any other woman in your world, Chuck. I cannot abide by this."

He took her hand and brought it up to his lips. "Alicia is gone," he told her. "I have not been with her since before I met you."

"One fight, Chuck. One fight and you ran straight into her arms."

"I have not been with any woman since you."

She shook her head. "One fight and you run to her home. It does not matter what you did or did not do. There is another woman in our lives, one you can run to for comfort."

His voice dropped. "Like you run to Nathaniel for the same?"

She turned around in his arms. "He has been my confidante for ten years, Chuck."

"When will either of you cease bringing up that wretched decade?" Blair stepped back at the spite in his voice. "Everywhere I turn there is one person who brings up that lost decade. Nothing happened in that infernal decade apart from a little girl writing letters to a boy who is lying in wait for an heiress." He took a deep breath, then pulled her hand. "I apologize." Blair turned away from him. "Blair—"

"You need to leave, my lord. I am off to meet with the duchess about the final arrangements for tomorrow."

"I shall take you there."

"Of course," she said coldly. "I would say that Lord Nathaniel has offered to take me, but I am afraid you will remember that useless decade and explode."

~o~o~o~o~o~

"It was the first time I was alive again since Misty died."

Chuck turned around and saw his father walk into the library while Chuck waited for Blair to finish with Lilly. The last time he spoke to the duke was the day he walked out with Blair in his arms, that dinner when Bartholomew revealed his part in Harold Waldorf's death. He had been loathe to come by. He needed to take Blair out of the house immediately for fear that longer exposure to his father would be that much more chance for her to discover the truth.

It seemed a sin to take her here now.

"What are you talking about?" Chuck demanded.

"One advice my grandfather told me was that you should never give everything you are to a woman," Bartholomew shared. "He was a wise man, my grandfather. He knew the Bass temperament, knew it was difficult for a Bass to fall in love, but when we do, we tended to give it our all—so much we lose ourselves."

"I see no wrong in that."

"I loved your mother like that." Chuck shifted on his feet, uncomfortable at the turn of conversation. He and his father did not speak of his mother. They had not done it once since Chuck was born. It was criminal to listen to the staid duke speak of his deceased wife in that manner. "I was a brash young man and I gave it everything." He shook his head. "That was a mistake. Always leave some for yourself. If you do not, and when they leave, you are left with nothing. I was a shell of a man when she died."

"You talk about it as if she were at fault. She died, father."

"I was wrong," Bartholomew told his son. "I thought if you gave someone everything you are, there is no chance she will leave you. You took care of that."

"Where is this going?"

"Lilly van der Woodsen was the first person to make me come alive since Misty died," Bartholomew shared. He walked closer to his son. "I am telling you this because I need you to understand why. You have despised me since you learned about the comte."

"The admiral covered it up."

"It was a duel. Your stepmother had been involved with Blair's father at the time. When I grew enamored of her in France, Harold insisted in a time-honored tradition."

"It had been outlawed for years, father," Chuck said softly.

Bart nodded. "That is why I am in debt to the Archibalds. He bribed the constable to make it appear like a stray bullet, a hunting incident."

"I was fifteen." The two turned and found Blair at the door, looking ghostly white as she looked straight at the duke. "We were out hunting, and he told me he would be back. And his man dragged him to me dying. It was all I could do to stay conscious when we talked me through washing the wound and draining the blood." She closed her eyes, and when she opened them, it was at Chuck that she looked at. "He died in my arms. My lord, I cannot be part of this family," she sobbed.

Blair turned around and ran out of the townhouse. Chuck ran after her and stopped at the doorway. Nathaniel held up his hand as he held Blair, then helped her up to his carriage.

"Blair!" Chuck called.

She looked back at him, then shook his head. "Not now."

~o~o~o~o~o

Nathaniel opened the door for Chuck and cocked his head towards the guest wing. Chuck looked at Nathaniel suspiciously before heading on up the stairs. At the bottom step, Chuck saw Lady Anne watching the two.

"She is exhausted."

"I need to speak with her," he said briskly.

Nathaniel nodded and led Chuck to the bedroom that he had deposited Blair in. He turned back and followed. When he opened the door, Nathaniel gave him a pat of reassurance and left.

He settled into the seat by the bed. "Blair," he said softly, waiting for her to wake. "Blair, my love, wake up."

She did not move, but her red-rimmed eyes opened. "Chuck?"

He moved to sit next to her on the bed. "You are right. We cannot live with all the secrets." She nodded her head sadly. Chuck remembered his father's words, and thought of how gut-wrenching the decision would be, but told himself that whatever this pain would be so much easier than if he waited. "After the wedding, I am sending you to Hartington with Daniel Humphrey. He will see to your monies, your affairs."

"What?" she said in a small voice. Whatever she had expected, it was not this calm, collected decision.

"Our son will have my name," he assured her. "And you can live in peace away from a family you despise, away from the man who hurts you at every turn." When she started to tear up, he sighed. "I am trying to fix it now, and still I make you cry." Chuck brought her hand to his lips. "I am very sorry to learn what my father had done to yours, Blair, but I cannot live in fear of whether tomorrow, you would have had enough of me and leave for Nathaniel and your past."

"Because I run to Nathaniel? My lord, I have done not one thing that could shame you."

"Blair, let me fix it. This is how."

"This is not happening," she whispered. "I do not understand."

"It is time we stop the up and down, love and hate, deception and forgiveness. We are bound to destroy each other if we do not fix it now."

"You promised me forever," she said in accusation.

"This is the only way I know to save us, Blair. We have combusted so fast because we fell so fast." He paused. "We need time apart."

"That is not what I want," she whispered.

He placed a soft, trembling kiss on her cheek, and the moment his lips touched her skin, she closed her eyes and allowed the tears to fall. "Trust me, Blair. This is what we need now."

She watched him leave the room. "Will you come for me, my lord?" she called after him. "Will you come for me at least when the child is born?"

Chuck stopped at the door. "Who knows? Perhaps even before that."

"I pray you will," she said softly.

"Now rest, Blair. The wedding is early tomorrow."

The door closed behind him. She walked over o the bed and crawled under the sheets. She cried herself to an exhausted slumber.

tbc