Deserted pavements bathed in dim glow from the few streetlights that the city management had cared to put up in the park, a cold luminosity scarcely helped at all by a hollow looking moon. He was on his way back now, at least feeling somewhat refreshed by the chilly night air. It seemed like autumn was slowly approaching.

Physical training was something that always seemed to help Kurogane clear his thoughts and after dinner he had told Fay he was going out jogging for a while, since the blonde refused to let him help in the kitchen anyway… Fay had just smiled and told him to have fun, smiling a plastic smile and humming softly as he put the plates back on the shelf.

He had ran trough the park in higher speed than usual, a fruitless attempt to make himself stop thinking about anything at all. Like meditation, when everything that counted was your own breathing. But after half an hour he gave up, it seemed like neither whiskey nor training could help him at this rate. There was only one singe chance for him to get back to normal, and that was solving a case that had begun before he was even born.

As he first got back to the apartment, he thought that it was empty. There weren't any sounds to be heard, no footsteps, no rattling from the kitchen, no greeting. For a few seconds he was sure that Fay had ran away, but decided that if he had, his shoes would most likely have been gone. The man might be acting like a reckless idiot, but two run away in early autumn without outdoor clothes was more then reckless…

The door to the guestroom was open and as he looked inside he saw the thin man sitting at the end of the bed, clenching his knees as if he was trying to make himself as little as possible. His face was turned towards the window making it impossible for Kurogane to see his features. As the other man took a step into the room, Fay turned around rapidly, the impossibly blue eyes filled with fear. His panic disappeared as soon as he saw who it was and instead a bright smile showed up in his face, however it fell out in contrast to his eyes, which were swollen and red from crying.

"Kuro-sama," he greeted him softly, "I didn't hear you coming back…"

As if the tears in the other mans eyes had put a strange spell on him, Kurogane instantly walked over to the bed with clenched teeth. The seriousness in the black haired man's eyes seemed to make Fay uneasy and as Kurogane raised his right hand, the blonde flinched back as if he expected a slap.

Instead, Kurogane took hold of his chin and turned his face upwards.

"You were crying," he stated.

Fay tried to turn away from him.

"No, I wasn't, it's just the washing-up liquid, it makes my eyes tear."

The taller man frowned, released him and turned away to look out trough the window. It was all still out there, only an old cat made its way across the car park.

"Like hell," he said, "you were crying and it's no point in denying. Damn, I don't even know why you're denying it!"

"I don't want Kuro-sama to see me cry," Fay said quietly behind him, "he shouldn't have to worry about me. I ought to leave at once because I will only make him unhappy if I stay."

"Maybe," he turned back and placed his hand on the side of the other man's face again, "but that is my decision to make."

Fay inhaled in shock as Kurogane closed the space between them and places his lips over his. But as soon as the first surprise had passed, he raised a hand to clench in the larger man's t-shirt, kissing him back open-mouthed.

It was a long kiss and, Kurogane had to admit, probably the best one of his life. Fay was apparently a skilled kisser and his lips and tongue were velvety soft. As he drew back for air he saw that the blonde had dropped his idiotic doll-smile and instead new tears had gathered in his eyes.

"This is no good, Kuro-sama," he whispered, "we ought to stop this. We ought to stop this right now…"

"Tell me to stop and I will," the other man answered shortly, but when no response came, he closed the distance again.

Afterwards Kurogane was unsure about how long the kissing had gone on, because it felt like ages. And somehow they both ended up on top of the bed, Fay on his back and Kurogane on top, leaning on one elbow so that he wouldn't crush the smaller man with his weight. Their mouths were still locked together in frantic kissing while each of them tried to get the other one rid of his clothes. Half way during the undressing process, Kurogane halted, trying to draw back.

"I'll need to get something," he forced himself to say, not at all wanting to let go of the slim body underneath his own.

"In the drawer," Fay panted, "by the bed. Tomoyo-chan seems to think about everything."

Not sure if he should be irritated or thankful about this, Kurogane reached over, opened the drawer and found the bottle awaiting there. Odd as it might be, he hadn't even looked inside that drawer before. Which she knew that you wouldn't do…

He turned his attention back to Fay again. The tears were all gone now and replaced by heath and desire, even if he could still see the sadness lurking behind. At least it was an honest look and the brief smile on his lips was almost genuine.

"Last chance," Kurogane told him as he spilled some of the bottle's content over his fingers, "if you're going to tell me to stop, do it now."

Fay shook his head slowly.

"It's so unwise," he said, "so very unwise, but Kuro-sama feels so good and I don't want him to stop this now."

"Fine," Kurogane said shortly, spilling some lube in Fay's hand as well before putting the bottle away, "I might hurt you now, though."

The blonde gave a little gasp as the first finger slid inside him but since he didn't seem to be in any actual pain, Kurogane didn't wait long until he added the next finger, moving and bending them carefully sometimes before adding the third and last. Fay moaned loudly by now, reaching up the hand in which he had the rest of the lubricant to smear it out on the other man's cock. As soon as he was done, Kurogane drew out his fingers, ignoring the dissatisfied little sound this granted him.

"Ready?" he asked, and as Fay nodded breathlessly, he lowered himself down at him.

It was a kind of lovemaking unlike everything else Kurogane had ever experienced before. Fay was clinging to him as if it was the only lifeline he had left, his fingers clawing his back so hard it hurt while whispering different versions of his name like a mantra. It was all bittersweet despair, sweaty, rough and very, very honest. And, Kurogane realized, not unpleasant at all.

Fay came first, spilling himself over Kurogane's hand while moaning some random nickname, and only couple of thrusts later, Kurogane followed him. They lay still for a few moments, exhausted by the intensity of it all, before Kurogane rolled of, afraid to hurt the delicate man. Fay turned to face him, smiling softly and almost happily.

"Thank you," he said, "thank you for caring so much about me, for letting me live here, for not hating me…"

Kurogane frowned, put his arms around the blonde's thin waist and pulled him closer.

"You're such an idiot," he said, "such a stupid, annoying and dishonest idiot."

Fay snuggled up to him.

"I know that," he said, "yet Kuro-sama is so sweet to me."

The black haired man snorted.

"I'm not sweet," he said, lazily moving his hand trough the other man's messy hair, "and you better get to sleep now, Tomoyo will expect you to come in time tomorrow."

And Yuuko would expect him to, he added for himself. With a little luck the witch would soon decide to share with him some more of that confidential information she had, even if that meant just another freaking game. He looked down at the pale man he held in his arms. His eyes were closed now and his breathing was quickly slowing down to an easy, steady pace. He was even more beautiful like this, Kurogane thought, without fake smiles and nervous giggles.

Somewhere deep inside he could hear the words Yuuko had spoken earlier that day; "If you thought that you could save him, would you try?"

And somehow, he thought that he had had the answer for that question all the time…