A/N
Oh-hohoho... this should be funny...
-Grimm
Watanuki stood in the kitchen, trying to shut out the noise of the screaming girl's voice.
"DAMMIT! WHAT KIND OF A PLACE IS THIS?! I COME TO A STUPID FRICKIN WISH SHOP AND HERE YOU ARE, TELLING ME YOU CAN'T GRANT MY DAMN WISH?!" the girl continued to yell at Wata-pii. He tried to remain calm.
"I'm sorry... Yuuko-san is out right now but I'm sure if you come back later..."
"LISTEN YOU TRANS! I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE ORDERS FROM SOME LITTLE GAY KID! WHAT, ARE YOU GOING TO HIT ME WITH YOUR PURSE?!" this set Wata-tan off the wall.
"WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?! FOR YOUR INFORMATION I AM ATTRACTED TO A VERY NICE GIRL NAMED HIMAW-"
"Right. A huh. Sure. And you walk around with..." she pointed at Larg. "A STUFFED RABBIT." she said. Wata-kichi didn't have time to speak before she screamed at the top of her lungs... "WHAT THE HELL?! MY LIFE IS SO BORING!! I WISH SOMETHING EXCITING WOULD HAPPEN ONCE IN A WHILE, AT LEAST MORE EXCITING THAN RUNNING INTO A GUY WITH A PORK BUN FETISH!" the girl yelled in Watanuki's face. He fumed.
"Maybe you should be wishing for some frickin anger managment classes instead." he said coly.
"I WISH MY LIFE WASN'T SO BORING!" the girl screamed again. Just then, Yuuko san walked in smoking that awesome little hookah of hers.
"Did someone say... wish?"
The girl and Yuuko both sat down together at the table, the girl was still fuming. Yuuko ignored her state and refilled her hookah with more illegal pot from who-knows-where. The girl looked at Yuuko's hookah with interest.
"Um... Miss Yuuko?"
"Yes?"
"May I smoke some pot?" the girl asked very plainly. Yuuko just stared at her, then closed her eyes and continued to smoke her hookah.
"I'm sorry... it's not legal. We don't do anything illegal here in my shop." Yuuko said. Watanuki, who was evesdropping, mouth dropped open. The girl with Yuuko had the same reaction.
"But... um... isn't you smoking pot illegal?" she asked Yuuko. Yuuko pondered this for a moment, then shrugged.
"Eh... maybe. I don't know. Anyway..." she said, puffing another smoek circle. "What's your wish?"
"My life sucks."
"Oh dear." Yuuko clicked her tongue in dissapointment. The girl looked confused.
"Um... what?"
"Well, you see, at the beginning of this chapter you have a violent encounter with the main character, Kimihiro Watanuki. Not to mention now you tell me that you have a sucky life..." Yuuko nodded. "Yes, these are the symptoms of a Mary Sue." she explained to the girl. Then she leaned in closer. "Are you a Maru Sue?"
"Um... my name's Nami, actually..." the girl said, still not getting it. Yuuko sat back and chuckled.
"Never mind. You're too stupid to be a Mary Sue."
"SAY WHAT?!"
"Oh-hohoho... anyway, you want your life to be more exciting?"
"Yes." the girl said. Yuuko put on her sage-like expression and said in a morbid voice...
"THERE IS A PRICE."
"I'M FRICKIN BROKE, WOMAN!" the girl yelled. Yuuko put her hands over her ears theatrically.
"Dear child, be reasonable." Yuuko said. "It is not a finacial price..."
"What is it?"
"You must pay..." Yuuko paused for dramatic affect. "YOUR BRAVERY."
"My... bravery?" the girl asked, confused. Yuuko nodded.
"You see, once I take your bravery away from you, you will fear EVERYTHING." Yuuko explained. The girl looked at her strangely.
"How does this make my life exciting?"
"It makes it the most exciting life anybody has."
"HOW IN THE HELL..?" Yuuko held up her hand, shutting the girl up.
"Well, why do you think people plung down hills in unsecure cars going 100 some miles an hour, held by only a single metal bar?"
"um..."
"FEAR MAKES THINGS EXCITING, YOU IDIOT CHILD!" Yuuko bonked the girl on the head. "NOW GO AND BE AFRAID!"
Two Days Later
A raving lunatic girl was yelling at everything she could see. A car passed her.
"OH MY GOSH IT'S THE FRICKIN FBI!" she screamed, grabbing a man by the collar as he walked past her. "THEY'RE OUT TO GET ME! ALL OF THEM!" she screamed into the man's face. Then she looked deep into his eyes and screamed again, flinging him ten feet in front of her. "AND YOU'RE OUT TO GET ME, TOO!" she screamed, then started running. The cops eventually came with a straight jacket.
"Ma'am, we are going to have to deport you to the local asylum now..."
"MUTINY!" she screamed. The police looked at each other, confused.
"Mutiny, ma'am?" they asked. She got a wild look in her eyes, and started to wring her hands.
"It aaaaall started with the... STRAWBEEEERRRRIIIIEEEEESSSSZZZZZZ!" she said.
"Ma'am, this is real life, not a Humphry Bogart movie. Get in the van." the police officer patted the girl on the shoulder. "It's okay, at least you have an exciting life..."
A/N
Bored, anyone?