Title: Curse of Fate: Outtake Eight, Knock Before Entering
Author: Mistress Nika
Rating: PG-15
Summary: There are some things you just don't want to know about your children.
Pairings: Sirius/Remus, Harry/Lucius/Severus, Hermione/Pansy, Mandy/Su/Daphne/Padma/Lisa
Warnings: implied sex, slash, femslash
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
Notes: Empy, I hope this makes you very happy. ;)

Knock Before Entering AKA Hormones Galore

Sirius Black was having a good day. He'd slept in until noon and had eventually been awakened by a randy werewolf, much to his glee. They'd had a VERY late breakfast in bed and then found themselves all alone in that big house. Being the hormonal and very much in love couple they were, they continued the plans they'd begun at the beginning of Harry's first year to 'christen' every room in the house. Considering the size of the home, it wasn't surprising that they were still working on it five years later.

Now, had the two been thinking with the proper head, they would have realized something was wrong with this situation. It was summer. Summer meant a multitude of house guests that didn't want to leave. Perhaps they should have searched a bit more thoroughly for other occupants before enacting their romp.

Sirius reached for the doorknob to the gallery, not pulling away from Remus and continuing their frantic groping as he hastily shoved the door open.

A feminine shriek cut through the air and they shot apart to take in the scene before them.

"Oh. Hi, Hermione." Sirius smirked as everyone but him stared at each other in horrified embarrassment. "Nice panties, Pansy."

"Sorry!" Remus exclaimed with a blush, grabbing the doorknob and pulling it hastily shut.

Once again, you'd think they would learn from this, but they, or rather Sirius, figured that if other people were doing it...why not them?

While Remus headed to the chapel to see if it was suitable for desecration, Sirius headed to the family room with the same purpose.

He eased the door open with care, glancing around for other members of the household, before deeming it empty. However, as he took a few steps inside, he was beyond shocked when Harry, naked as the day he was born, leaped up from behind the couch and made a mad dash for the closet. Jerking the door closed, a pair of green eyes peered out at him from the crack.

His mouth worked soundlessly for a moment before demanding, scandalized, "Why are you naked!?"

As if in answer, Lucius leaped up, also nude, from behind the couch and made a mad dash for the same closet, cupping his unmentionable bits in his hands.

Sirius, while resigned to the fact that his godson was not a child, was now realizing there were some things he most definitely did not want to know. "Forget I asked," he muttered, preparing to turn away and leave.

Fate was not so kind.

A second black head popped up from behind the couch and pinned him with a hostile glare. Sirius felt his breakfast shift as he caught sight of a bared shoulder, his mind automatically supplying the knowledge that this person was also naked.

Severus nearly snarled at him, "Go away and shut the door! Can't you see people are trying to have sex here!?"

With wide eyes, he backed out quickly and shut the door.

Ten minutes later, Remus found him still staring at the closed door with a traumatized expression.

"Sirius?" he questioned, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Sirius turned to him slowly, then threw himself into his mate's chest and began crying brokenly. Remus patted his head comfortingly despite his confusion as the grown man was reduced to a sobbing wreck. "I guess you don't want to know what I found the five Ravenclaw girls doing, then? They're very inventive."

Sniffling, Sirius finally raised his head and said softly, "Moony, I'm scared. I wanna move out."