------------------------
CHAPTER SEVEN
------------------------
As the three travelers were sleeping on their cliff, Lord Darien was enjoying himself in his spacious bedroom. He had several outfits that were already pre-made for him and his future wife, including a formal set and a wedding set. There was also a painting of him and Rei now hanging over the fireplace. He was currently watching the picture of the princess on the mirror's glass for about the fiftieth time.
"Show me again," Darien ordered. The Yamcha mirror raised his eyebrow at him, and Lord Darien rephrased his order. "Mirror mirror show her to me, show me the princess!" He commanded.
With an inaudible sigh, the mirror complied. Darien took a long sip of his martini, his favorite drink that he had made at the private bar in his bedroom.
"Ah, perfect," He whispered as he stared at the picture before him.
The sun had risen just moments before Rei silently pushed the door of her small cave open and stepped out.
She glanced over at the snoozing travelers and grinned, then ran off into the woods. She felt so alive, so free, and so happy. She spun around in a quick circle and smiled at the golden sunshine. Then she began to sing. Surprisingly, she wasn't that bad. A small bluebird flitted up on a branch and joined the princess in her short song. Rei led the bird on a rising chorus... unfortunately for the bird, the princess's final, shrieking, off-key note was just too much. The little bird bloated out from the strain and exploded. Rei stared at the smoldering legs that still clung to the branch, as a few smoked feathers floated through the air. She then looked down at the eggs that were left in the nest. She couldn't leave them alone....they would get cold and die without their mother, after all..
Rei poked at the eggs frying on the small stone over the fire she had started. She smiled as she inhaled the smell of food, and Goku rolled over and sniffed the air in his sleep. He sat up and opened his eyes to see the princess hunched over a tiny fire, cooking. He blinked, and then glanced over at Artemis who was making odd sounds and kicking in his sleep.
"Mmm, yeah, you know I like it like that.... Mmm, oh, come on, baby I said I like it...." Artemis's sleep talk was quickly hushed by Goku's large hand.
The taller saiya-jin felt his face getting red as he glanced at the princess and hoped she had not heard Artemis's dream. "Artemis wake up!" Goku hissed at the sleepy feline.
Artemis slowly blinked open his eyes. "Huh, what?" He mumbled.
Goku snickered and shook his head. "Wake up."
Artemis gave him a look that clearly showed he wasn't up yet. "Oh, what?" He said in a dazed voice. Goku shook his head.
Rei glanced over at them and smiled. "Morning. How do you like your eggs?" She asked cheerfully.
Artemis jumped up and grinned at her. "Good morning, princess!" He gushed.
Goku wasn't nearly so perky as he looked at Rei. "What's all this about?" He asked while waving his hand at the eggs.
Rei gave him a soft smile. "You know, we kind of got off to a bad start yesterday, and I wanted to make it up to you. I mean, after all, you did rescue me," She spoke softly as she placed the hot eggs down for them.
Goku scratched the back of his head and blinked. "Uh, thanks," He mumbled.
Rei grinned at him. "Well, eat up. We've got a big day a head of us," She said brightly.
Goku and Artemis shrugged their shoulders at each other and ate their breakfast.
The forest was peaceful in the morning; the animals went about their activities and the birds sang happily as the cool breeze blew through the trees. The serenity was shattered by a loud belch that erupted from Goku as he walked a long the road.
"Goku!" Artemis cried. Goku gave him an odd look.
"What? It's a compliment. Better out than in, I always say," He smiled at the princess as he spoke.
Rei suppressed a chuckle as she listened to Artemis admonish Goku. "That's no way to behave in front of a princess!" Artemis snapped.
Rei ruined the white cat's efforts by belching nearly as loudly as Goku had.
"Thanks," She said to Goku as she walked past the pleasantly shocked fur-ball.
Artemis stared on in disbelief. "She's as nasty as you are," He muttered.
Goku laughed a bit at that and gave the princess a small grin. "You know, you're not exactly what I expected," He said to her.
Rei returned the tiny smile as she replied. "Well, maybe you shouldn't judge people before you get to know them."
She winked at the slightly confused saiya-jin and walked on. She started to sing the same song she had sung with the bird as she walked along, but she was cut short, as a strange turbaned man in a green tunic and a red cape swung down on a vine, whisking her off the road.
Rei yelped in both surprise and anger as the man landed on a tree branch with her. The princess glared at the tall stranger, pushing herself away from him. "What are you doing?" She demanded angrily.
The guy grinned at her and lowered his sunshades to wink at the short-tempered princess. "Be still Cherie, for I am your savior, and I am rescuing you from this pink...beast," He said in a lame French accent. What was more annoying to Rei was the fact that the man had slobbered kisses all up her right arm, and was now closing in on her face. The princess had never felt more in need of rescuing than she did now, she thought, and growled at the strange man.
Just then, Goku and Artemis ran over to the base of the tree and yelled up at them. "Hey! That's my princess! Go find your own!" He snarled.
The man gave Goku an annoyed look. "Ha! Please, monster! Can't you see I'm a little busy here?" He shooed the two travelers away, unaware of Rei's enraged look.
"Oh! Look, pal, I don't know who you think you are--" Rei's rant was cut short by the man.
"Ah, of course, how rude of me. Please, let me introduce myself," He said to the irate princess. He then yelled over his shoulder. "Oh Merry Men!" He grinned as several men jumped out from the bushes, one playing an accordion, and began to dance and sing.
The strange man, known as the Great Saiya-man, jumped down from his perch and led them in a rousing song, not to mention several absurd poses. He took out a small knife and sang about how he was going to kill Goku, but just as he was crooning out a long note, Rei swung down on a vine and kicked him in the head.
The Great Saiya-man smacked head-first into a rock and fell to the ground, unconscious. Rei smirked at the fallen body. "Man, that was annoying," She huffed.
One of the men behind her glared at her. "Why you little--" He rushed at the princess and was swiftly knocked to the ground like his leader.
The rest of the men were all on the ground in less than five minutes, courtesy of Rei's impressive karate kicks and flying fists. When the princess realized that she had knocked them all out, she smiled nonchalantly at Goku and Artemis.
"Ahem... um, shall we?" She said off-handedly as she walked past them. Goku stared after her in shock.
"Hold the phone." He dropped Artemis, who had jumped into his arms when an arrow was shot in their direction, and ran after Rei.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on now...." He caught up to the princess and gave her a confused look. "Where did that come from?" He asked.
Rei smiled at him. "What?" She asked while shrugging her shoulders.
Goku waved his hand back towards the fallen bodies. "That, back there, that was amazing!" He smiled broadly at the short princess. Rei grinned, trying desperately to hold back her blush as Goku looked down at her in awe. "Where did you learn that?" He asked, still amazed.
Rei thought quickly as she tried to explain herself. "Well, when one lives alone, uh, one has to learn these things, in case there's--- there's an arrow in your butt!"
Rei completely confused Goku with her strange explanation. "What?!" He cried. He glanced at his behind where the princess was pointing and raised his eyebrow at the shaft of wood protruding from his posterior. "Oh, would you look at that," He mumbled in surprise.
He tried to tug it out and yelped at the sudden pain in his rear. Rei looked horrified. "Oh, no, this is all my fault! I'm so sorry," She said sadly as Artemis joined them.
"Why? What's wrong?" He asked.
Rei sighed. "Goku's hurt," She mumbled.
Artemis felt the color drain from his face. "Goku's hurt? Goku's hurt! Oh no! Goku's gonna die!" He cried in a panic.
Goku rolled his eyes. "Artemis, I'm ok," He said.
Artemis wasn't listening; he was in a blind panic by now. "Oh, you can't do this to me, Goku! I'm too young for you to die! Keep your legs elevated, turn your head and cough," He ranted while Goku just rolled his eyes again. "Does anyone know the Heimlich?" Artemis continued to rave wildly.
Rei grabbed hold of the cat by the shoulders and looked him in the face while shaking him firmly. "Artemis, calm down! If you want to help Goku, run into the woods and find me a blue flower with red thorns," She ordered firmly.
Artemis nodded his head rapidly. "Blue flower with red thorns... Ok I'm on it! Don't die, Goku, and if you see a long tunnel, stay away from the light!" He cried.
Goku and Rei gave the hysterical feline twin glares. "Artemis!" They growled.
Artemis blinked. "Oh yeah, blue flower, red thorns...," He mumbled to himself as he dashed off into the trees.
Goku scratched his head. "What are the flowers for?" He asked.
Rei gave him a sly smirk. "For getting rid of Artemis," She snickered.
Goku raised an eyebrow in the direction Artemis had gone. "Ah." He understood the need to have done that; Artemis could be... difficult to control at times.
Goku didn't notice as Rei moved around behind him, and she spoke softly as she walked up to the saiya-jin's rear. "Now, you hold still, and I'll yank this thing out," She said calmly. Before Goku could even react to what she had said, the princess was giving the arrow shaft a firm yank.
Goku jumped into the air with a roar. "Ow! Hey! Easy with the yanking!" He cried as he hopped away from Rei.
The princess put her fists on her slender hips. "Well, I'm sorry, but it has to come out. Now, now let me--" Rei tried to reason with Goku as she chased the saiya-jin around the clearing.
Goku ran ahead of Rei in an attempt to keep the princess's hands away from his rear and the lodged arrow. "No, no, it's tender!" He yelped as he barely managed to evade Rei's hand.
The princess ran after him. "Now-- now don't move!" She huffed.
Goku gave her a quick glare as he dodged him. "No! What you're doing is the opposite of help! Ok, look-- look! Time out!" He growled as he turned around and put his hand over Rei's face, stopping the princess in her tracks.
Rei grunted at him. "Would you--!" She huffed as she pulled Goku's hand from her face. "Ok, what do you propose we do?" She asked.
Artemis was tramping through the forest with a frustrated look on his face. "Blue flower, red thorns; blue flower, red thorns... This would be so much easier if I wasn't color blind!" He growled as he stomped through a small gathering of blue flowers with red thorns. A sudden scream made him snap to attention, and he instinctively grabbed a small cluster of the flowers. "Hold on Goku! I'm coming!" He yelled as he ran back.
Goku groaned as Rei tugged on the arrow again. He was lying belly down over a log, while Rei yanked on the arrow to try and remove it. "Ow! Not good," he sighed.
Rei licked her lips in determination. "Ok, ok, I can move this thing, it's just about....," She muttered while pulling hard on it. Goku's eyes widened.
"Ow! Ow!" He cried.
He rolled over to get Rei to let go of the arrow, and ended up with the smaller princess on top of him. Rei and Goku blinked into each other's eyes and fought off the urge to blush as their bodies lay against each other in a delicious position. Goku couldn't help but notice how well the princess fit between his
powerful legs, or how wonderful her smaller chest felt as it pushed against his own whenever Rei breathed.
It was at that moment that Artemis returned. He stared silently at the two for a second before clearing his throat and raising an eyebrow at them. Goku and Rei looked over at him in surprise.
"Nothing happened!" Goku yelped as he threw Rei off of him. The princess landed with a small thud on the ground, wincing as she rubbed her rear. "We were just, uh...," Goku trailed off miserably as Artemis walked past him with a snort.
"Look, if ya'll wanted to be alone, all ya had to do was ask." He said.
Goku waved his hands in the air. "Oh come on! That's the last thing on my mind! The princess here was just--Oh!" He groaned in pain as he looked down at a wickedly smirking princess.
Rei gave the saiya-jin an evil grin as she waved the now removed arrow at him.
"Ow," Goku whispered painfully.
Artemis glanced at them and paled a bit. "Hey, what's that? Is that... blood?" He promptly fainted after asking his question. Goku sighed and hoisted the limp feline over his shoulder and started walking, or rather, limping down the road with the princess.
Their journey seemed to brighten after the arrow incident. Goku would hold trees down over rivers so Rei could cross, and the princess used a spider web to catch some pesky insects that were bothering Goku as they walked through a field---She had even twirled the web into the shape of cotton candy for the saiya-jin to snack on. To top it all off, the two caught a poor frog and an unlucky snake, and made amphibian and reptile balloons for each other.
Artemis noted with a small grin that they seemed to be getting very close to each other. Things were looking good from his point of view.