As promised, here is a chapter for you tonight. I decided to do a more emotional chappie tonight, cause I was in a romantic mood. And for those of you who think Mark is out of character, I completely disagree. There is a scared little boy in Mark Sloan and that is what I tried to capture in this chapter.

There will be no update tomorrow, due to the holidays. I will try for something on Friday, and I think I will be able to deliver. Merry Christmas to those who celebrate, and Happy Holidays to all the rest!

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"It's so quiet," Lexie said as they lay there in the darkness. The rain continued to beat against their windows and the balcony, as it had for the past four hours. Lexie loved these moments the best. After her and Mark had satisfied each other, and they had no energy left, when they would just rest together. Mark would let his fingers drag up and down her spine, and she would rest her head on his chest and listen to the steady "thump thump" of his heart. Lexie felt more connected to Mark in these moments than she did in any other. He was his most vulnerable, and sometimes he would tell her what he was really thinking. In was in a moment like this that Mark had told her about his mother and father, and the loneliness that he had always felt. And it was in a moment like this that Mark had told her how he used to be afraid of the dark, and how he had only moved past that fear as an adult.

Lexie wondered if he felt as close to her.

"Yeah," Mark whispered. "Everyone is asleep." He kissed her head and yawned. "The whole city."

"Except for us," Lexie murmured.

"Except for us," Mark agreed.

Lexie snuggled even closer to him, if that was possible, and kissed his chest where she was resting her head. "I love you."

"I know," Mark said, smiling in the darkness.

"I like saying it," Lexie confessed. "There is something magical about those words, as if they can do anything."

Mark's chest rumbled in laughter. "What do you mean? You think that words have some sort of power?"

"All words have power, Mark," Lexie said matter of factly. "Don't you ever wonder why some words just crush us to our very souls?"

"No," Mark said.

"Well, I do," Lexie replied. "Why is it some words can rob us of all reason or happiness? They are just words, and yet we let them mean much more."

"What are you trying to say, Lexie?" Mark asked, brushing her hair away from her face.

"I guess I am just saying that I don't want to miss a chance to tell you how much I love you. I love you, Mark."

"I love you too," he whispered.

"As you should," Lexie said with a small smile. She was quiet for a while then, thinking about all the twists and turns that led her to this place. How much had happened for this very moment to occur? By all rights, Lexie shouldn't even be here in Seattle. If things had gone the way she planned, she would be at Mass General right now, in their intern program, not here apart of Seattle Grace. Instead, her mother died and she ended up back in her home town to be close to her father and sister. This idea was puzzling Lexie until she finally said, "Do you ever wonder what would have happened if we hadn't met?"

"What do you mean?" Mark asked.

"Like what if I hadn't come to Seattle?"

"Or what if I hadn't?" Mark added.

"Well, you would have come for Derek," Lexie said.

"But what if Derek hadn't been here in the first place?" Mark said, loving playing devil's advocate with her. "Derek is only in Seattle because I made it imperative for him to leave New York. If I hadn't slept with Addison…"

"We would have never met," Lexie finished for him. "I might have come back to Seattle no matter what. But you, if you hadn't…" Lexie trailed off, trying to imagine being at Seattle Grace without Mark there with her. She probably never would have stopped crushing on George. No, Lexie mentally stopped herself. She liked to think that she would have discovered that dead end with or without Mark. "Do you think…"

"Do I think what?" Mark asked.

"Do you think that we were meant to meet? Like everything happened for a reason?" Lexie's voice was full of hope, as if the idea of some divine intervention would make their relationship even more romantic. But Mark didn't give her the answer she wanted.

"No," he said flatly.

"No?"

"No," Mark said, without any hesitation in his voice. "I don't think this was part of some master plan. I don't want to think that my child had to die so that I could meet you."

"What?" Lexie gasped, jerking up into sitting position. She looked at him with a million questions in her eyes, and momentarily Mark wished that he had stayed quiet.

"Addison was…pregnant," Mark said. "She had an abortion…and didn't tell me ahead of time." Mark remembered the little onesie that he had bought for the baby and the way that he had felt when he purchased it. He had gone to a baby store in Manhattan and hadn't really know what he was looking for. He had wanted to get a present for Addison to let her know that he was onboard, but all he could think about was getting something for the baby. He had walked up and down the aisles, seeing so much baby paraphernalia that he should have been scared. And he was, for a moment, but then he had seen the baby section devoted to the Yankees. When he had found the onesie, Mark had known that the baby was good thing. Yes, he had been cheating on Addison, and yes, he knew that she didn't love him (hence, the cheating), but a baby was something. A baby was someone. Someone to love would automatically love him back. And that was worth a lot to a man who had never felt truly loved in his adult life.

Later, when Addison had told him she aborted it, Mark remembered feeling totally calmed, and not a bit surprised. The grief, that came later along with the sorrow. But in that first moment, Mark was calm. He had been so used to people throwing him over, to choosing someone else, to not loving him, to forgetting him that part of him had been prepared. He met every person with the idea in mind that one day he would be left behind. And now, lying in the dark with Lexie, Mark clutched her tighter to him and vowed: Not this time.

It was going to be different with her. Mark was never going to give the only woman who had ever loved him an excuse to leave him. But he still felt vulnerable, in the dark, having confessed his darkest secret and waiting for her reaction.

Mark looked at her, and noticed for the first time that her eyes were filled with tears. "Oh, Mark," she whispered, her voice emotional, "I am so sorry. That must have been horrible. I wouldn't wish that on anyone."

Mark shook his head. "You didn't know, and I should have told you earlier. That is why I can't think in terms of 'meant to be' and 'fated'. If that were true, this is one fucked up universe."

"Yeah," Lexie said, still sitting. She pulled her legs tight to her chest and looked at him sideways. "But you already knew that, didn't you?"

She was crying in earnest then.

"Hey," Mark said, sitting up and wrapping an arm around her as the sheet fell to his waist. "Why are you crying?"

"Because it was your baby, Mark. Your baby." Lexie rested her head on his shoulder.

"It wasn't my baby, not yet any way. It never became anyone's baby." Mark stroked her hair. "I thought you were pro-choice."

"In the abstract," Lexie said. "There should always be options, but I never was close enough to the idea for it to matter." Lexie looked at him, her brown eyes looking like pools of sorrow. "I am sorry, Mark."

"Me too," he whispered. "I sometimes wonder what he would have looked like. Is that silly?"

"No," Lexie murmured, kissing his head the way that he always kissed hers. "I am sure he would have looked like you. With your beautiful blue eyes."

Mark smiled. "That would have been nice." He paused then, a thought hitting him that had never occurred before. "We aren't using protection," Mark said. "You're on birth control, right?"

Lexie nodded. "Yes, I am."

"What if it fails?" Mark asked, trying to sound casual.

"Then we are having a baby," Lexie said. She took his hand, and smiled when she saw the way that his fingers engulfed hers. Looking into his eyes, she said, "I am in this all the way Mark. I don't think I could have an abortion in any case, but if it was your baby, I know I couldn't. Even if this doesn't work out, even if we end up in totally different places, I know I will cherish this time together as the best part of my life." Lexie smiled tentatively at him, "When I say that I love you, it doesn't come with conditions. It is a forever kind of thing for me. If you change your mind, or if something happens, that won't matter. I'll always love you, and anything that came from our love."

Mark looked into her eyes, trying to believe her words, but it was the utter calm that finally convinced him. In that moment he felt more vulnerable than he ever had before. "I'm scared," he confessed, telling her something he had never said to another human being.

"About what?" Lexie asked.

"That something is going to happen to change all this. That things can't stay this way; that you will eventually leave me. I am not a good guy, Lexie, and I know that someday you will figure it out and…" He trailed off, dropping his gaze to his hands.

"And you will get left behind again," Lexie finished for him.

Mark said nothing.

Lexie touched the side of his face, and pulled it to hers. "You say that a lot, Mark. That you are not a good guy or that you aren't good at relationships. You don't know how wrong you are about both those things. Do you know how rare you are?" Lexie asked.

Mark furrowed his brow. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, look at how you have been so far, Mark. You tried to stay away from me because Derek asked, and it was only when I came to you that things changed. You tried to be honest with Derek, and when you had to make a choice you chose me!" Lexie said that last part as if she couldn't believe it.

"Of course I did," Mark said.

"But you didn't have to," Lexie continued on. "You wanted to give us a chance. You picked me and insured that we would have one. You have been so good to me. You are a good man, Mark Sloan. And I love you for it."

Mark felt his cheeks get red at her words. "Lexie…"

"Yes?"

"You shouldn't say things like that," Mark said, kissing her. "You make me love you even more, as if that is possible."

Lexie grinned against his lips. "And you said that words have no power."

"Obviously, I was mistaken," Mark said.

"I love you," She whispered.

"I love you too," Mark replied. "Too much."

"Hmm," Lexie said, as he kissed her neck. "There is no such thing."

Mark laid her back onto the bed, kissing every inch of her neck as he did. "The way you say that to me does things to me."

"Sexy things?" Lexie asked with a laugh.

"Very sexy things," Mark said seriously. "Naughty. Sexy. Things."

"Mark?" Lexie said, suddenly serious.

He heard the tone in her voice and paused, lifting his head. "What? What's wrong?"

"I want to have a baby with you," Lexie said.

"What? Right now?" Mark asked in a rush. There was an edge of panic in his voice.

Lexie started laughing. "No, not right now. But someday. I want you to be the one who I have kids with."

Mark looked at her with shock on his face.

"Too soon?" Lexie asked, a smile in her eyes.

"No," Mark said slowly. "I don't think I could have ever heard that and not felt like I had just been hit with a Semi."

Lexie grinned. "Well, I just wanted you to know that eventually you will have to make a date in your appointment book. 'Knock Lexie up today'."

Mark shook his head. "I can't believe that you just released information like that into the universe. It's out there now."

"Now look who is giving words too much power."

Mark shook his head. "Damn," he said softly.

"What?" Lexie asked.

"I didn't think this was possible."

"What?"

"I want you even more now," Mark said, laying her down gently onto the mattress.

For the rest of the night, Mark made love to Lexie slowly, as if any moment their baby could be conceived.

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Hope you all enjoyed! Please Review!