Wonders of A Cheat Device

Now I knew I said this was going to be hacked date scene chapter but I've had writers block on romance/humour. Its been overdone by me to the point of near extinction from my mind. So in the meantime here's another helpful hack… OHKOs!

This is going to be painful for something.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the plot.

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"I hate submarines." Yuffie moaned, strapped in to one of the back seats as Cloud carried the gang away from the sunken Gelnika. Where they had managed to pick up a new materia in Hades and a new weapon in the form of Yuffie's Conformer. After beating 3 shades of blue into Reno and Rude of course. The Turks seemed to pop up everywhere.

"Relax Yuffie, it will soon be over." Tifa tried comforting the teenage ninja.

"I…urk…hope so. Motion sickness blows so much."

"Um, Teef. Yuff. We got a problem." Cloud said, his glowing blue eyes wide at the screen.

"What kind of problem?" Tifa asked.

"The 100 foot tall underwater destruction machine type of problem."

"Another weapon? I thought Diamond and Ultimate were the only two. And we beat both of them."

"Apparently not. This one looks much tougher. And we can't fight it underwater, the scuba tanks will only last for 20 minutes and we can't use our weapons very well underwater. So it looks like your on your own Tifa, sorry." Cloud apologized as the WEAPON stood right in front of them. It looked like it was charging some form of laser.

"Fine, just as long as the scuba gear doesn't squash my breasts, they don't like being squashed into small spaces." Tifa said moving over towards the equipment rack and then into the air lock.

"I will ignore that because the controls may go haywire if I bleed all over them." Cloud says trying not to have a spontaneous nosebleed from the comment and not look as Tifa changed into a wet suit.

--

"ROOARRR! DESTROY ALL JENOVA CELLS. ROAR!" Emerald WEAPON shouted. Trying to make itself look bigger as if a green killing machine wasn't scary enough.

Well here goes nothing Tifa thought as she swam towards the beast of the planet. She closed her eyes. Settled down on one of the ocean rocks, then launched a spinning kick similar to how people tackle in the FFX game Blitzball for those of you who played it.

The water took out a lot of the momentum so it barely tapped Emerald, however the impact was enough to send the WEAPON shooting up through the sea and out of the water. Landing on the plains next to Junon.

"boss man?" Reno began to ask Rufus who was watching it from his Junon office "What the hell just happened."

"Well either there was an underwater volcano, or that WEAPON disturbed Chuck Norris' underwater home."

--

"Uh Teef?" Cloud began as Tifa climbed back in. "How did you do that?"

"Not sure, but look I got this cool Harp!"

"Umm Cloud," Yuffie whispered in his ear "maybe we should just set Teef on Sephiroth now."

And loose my voyeur opportunities? No freaking way. Cloud thought "We need to get some more surface training done now."

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Ah. Maybe the term OHKO is the understatement of the fic. Especially with force like that.