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I walked over and sat in his lap and let his arms lock securely around me. I felt like I actually was wanted by someone to live. Suicide didn't feel right in Edwards's arms. But how long will it last?
BPOV
I sat content in his arms with my head on his shoulder. His arms were still tightly around me and rubbing circles into my back. The air was getting to a warm state and the sun was directly above us.
After a few minutes I pulled away and looked at Edward. He looked relieved but kind of neutral.
"Thank you," I whispered and pulled away.
"Don't go," he said, pulling me closer.
I was confused by his words. Why would he want me to stay? I asked myself too many times to count. Being as I am, I complied. His moved his arms from around my waist to snake down my arms. His hands finally came to rest on mine and he smiled.
"Would you like to come with me?" he asked in a nervous tone. His eyes were on me and his hands squeezed min gently.
"I… I… I… don't know," I said, taken aback by his words. They were the last things I ever predicted to come out of anyone's mouth, directed towards me.
"Please, I don't want you to go back home. Let me help you. We can get some help and make life better for you," he said.
The word help repeated itself over and over in my mind. My brain was telling me to run; to get away from him. Help would only make things more stressful on the ones I love and me. My carelessness of who was around me caused another person to be dragged into the black hole that is my life. Under no circumstances would I get help.
"No help," was what I so brilliantly squeaked out. And it came with a blush.
"Okay," he said quickly before I could do much else. "But will you please come with me? Just for a little while."
I thought about it for a minute. I didn't want to go home and my chance at suicide was royally blown. If he wanted me to go with him it couldn't be that tragic of a choice.
"Sure," I whispered. The word sure could get anybody out of any type of trouble. It was like a magical word.
Edward's face instantly brightened. In a swift motion he stood up and pulled me to my feet. Holding my tightly he lead me back from the way he came. A grin was painted onto his face and his pace was fast.
If it weren't for his hand holding mine so securely I would have made quite a few nasty face plants.
By then people were rushing this way and that with either dogs or children by their side. That day being a Saturday there were many people swarming around. As we moved at an alarming rate many took long looks at us. Their faces were mostly set in confused and disapproving looks. But it was understandable. I was stumbling along with big red puffy eyes and Edward had a slight grin on his face.
After what seemed like miles of walking but couldn't have been more than two hundred meters we came to the beaches parking lot.
I noticed the sun was much brighter when not under the protection of the trees. It was quite easy to tell why so many people wanted to be outside today.
The sun shone on Edward making him appear to glow. His hair looked like bronze before it cooled after being liquefied. The light also made his white shirt transparent.
When I quickened my pace to fall in step beside him I could see how muscular he really was. Every part of him that was visible to my eyes was sculpted and toned. Despite myself I couldn't seem to look away. In the sun there was no way he could not look god like.
My Edward filled thoughts quickly dispersed when he stopped in front of a shiny silver Volvo. He already had his keys in his hands and the passenger side door open. He signaled me with his arm to get into the car and I silently obliged.
The car's leather seats were warm from the sun. Even with the wind shield un tinted the car was extraordinarily dark.
Edward reached over my lap and buckled the seatbelt in.
"You okay?" he said, immediately wincing at the choice of words.
We both knew I was not okay. Suicide was an immense way of saying that I was not in any way 'okay'. I didn't think I would ever be either. I felt broken; absolutely shattered.
"I'm situated. Thank you," I told him with a halfhearted smile.
He removed his hand from mine and I immediately missed it. Why did he affect me so? It was strange for me to have physical contact with anyone; let alone want more.
I watched him as he softly clicked the passenger side door closed and walked around the car. His abs were easy to see with the transparency of his shirt and the sun seemed to make him glow. The more I watched him and how he moved and his expressions the more I realized how perfect he was. I didn't feel as if I hated him. I felt like I was growing a fondness toward him; being grateful that he saved me.
He moved around the car and opened the door. After he was inside of the vehicle he put the key into the ignition and started the Volvo. The radio immediately turned on the sounds of classical music filled the space. It was Clair de Lune by Debussy. I to say the least was royally shocked.
"You… and… Debussy?" I asked.
"I like the classics," he said with a shrug. "What about you?"
He angled his body in my direction and looked at me intently. His eyes looked more of a radioactive green goo in the darkness of the car. He nodded his head to let give me the hint to continue. I didn't realize I was ogling. I flushed a light pink and looked away.
"I like the classics too," I stated father lamely.
He gave me a sweet smile before turning his full attention back to the road. I looked out the window and noticed how fast he was going. Was he trying to get us killed?
I laugh at that one. I didn't guess I really cared if I died or not.
It had surprised me when Edward headed for the more forested part of Forks. It was the kind of area where the higher income families lived. It also seemed like a very secluded place. I really needed to be away from people. Edward took a turn onto a long driveway and before I knew it we came to a stop in front of what I gathered to be his house. From the outside it was quite easy to see that it was a rather old building. Paint was chipping off the shutters and some wood planks were missing from the porches roof.
Edward got out and came over to my side, opened the door, and helped me out. The sun hit me like a ton of bricks. The sun was brighter than I ever thought possible.
Using Edward's hand to steady myself, I stood up straight and looked at him. He nodded and moved toward the house with our hands still linked.
At the door he paused and looked at me.
"Are you ready?" he asked in a whisper.
I was a bit afraid but nodded my head and closed my eyes tightly.
That was a little bit of a cliff hanger for you.
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