The Ghost Chapter 2: All The Things She Said, a twilight fanfic

Author's Note:

OK, now I know some of you may want to know what happens to Bella. Does she survive? Does Edward changer her? Or will he be too late??? But I decided just to kill you with suspense, which is why I will go back to when Edward left Bella. So you'll have to bear with me for a while, you'll find out what happens when I know. Now I know this song may seem pretty strange to use, seeing as it was sung by two girls pretending to be lesbians, but if you just listen to the lyrics, you'll see why I choose it. Anyway the song is All the things she said by t.A.T.u. and I choose this song because if you imagine it from Edward's point of you, he's remembering all the things that happened between him and Bella and how it's tormenting him and he wish that could make it better, but he cant coz he wants to keep her safe. So enough explaining for now, let's get to it.

Chapter 2:

"All the things she said
all the things she said
Running through my head
running through my head
running through my head
(Running through my head)"

Bella. Bella. The name kept on running through my head; it wouldn't stop, as much as I wanted it to. As much as I wanted to forget her so that I get on with my life, just like I want Bella, I wouldn't let myself. I couldn't let myself. I should suffer for what I had just done to her. I have never seen a person look the way she did, when I told her I was leaving and she could not come with me. It was as if I had ripped her heart out of chest right then and there.

"All the things she said
all the things she said
Running through my head
running through my head
(Running through my head)
this is not enough"

At this exact point in time, I was rushing home to my house, to tell them that I had told Bella and that we had to leave now. Though I'm sure Alice has already seen it, I had to do it anyway, maybe so that I knew it was too late to take back what I already done.

"I'm in serious shit, I feel totally lost
If I'm asking for help it's only because
Being with you has opened my eyes
Could I ever believe such a perfect surprise?"

The tires screeched, as I pulled up at the house, to see my family ready to go. Each one of them looked at me, I don't think I've ever seen so many disappointed people and they were all disappointed in me, in what I had done. I tried to find the words, as I got out of the car, to somehow explain why I had this, but I couldn't think of anything. I knew what ever I thought would never condone the pain I had brought on someone who I wholeheartedly loved so much. Nothing I could ever say would make up for it, not to Alice, Rosalie, Emmet and Jasper, who had all just lost a person who they considered to be a sister. Not to Carlisle or Esme, who considered Bella to be their daughter, they had all welcomed her into their lives so warmly and I had just savagely ripped her from them.

"Are you ready to go?" I asked hoarsely, my throat dry, as I looked at their cold stares, heard their not so friendly thoughts.

"That depends," Alice said, walking down the stairs," are you considering about going back to Bella and telling her what a complete and utter arsehole, you were to say such things to her and to hurt in such a painful that resulted in you destroying her?"

"Alice, I'm giving her life. With me, she doesn't stand a chance." I let my anger get the best of me and now I was yelling, yelling because she was right.

At the sound of my growl, Jasper took a protective stance in front Alice, shielding her from me.

"Just because you stomped all over you girlfriend's feelings and are now heart broken yourself, do not take it out on my wife." He shouted, baring his teeth at me. The anger was radiating off of Jasper, as were his nasty thoughts that came unwelcome into my mind, sending me into such a rage that I found myself in a crouched position ready to pounce.

"Edward, Jasper, stop it the both of you." Carlisle ordered, stepping in between the two of us." Now Jasper, it is not up to you to question Edward's decision as it was his and his alone. And Edward does not snap at others, we will respect your decision but that does not mean we will like it or have to like it. "

He was right, I mused silently to myself, they all were, but I couldn't admit to that, I made my decision and now I was going to stick to it. And even though I didn't have my Bella to comfort at least I will always have her memory. Slowly I got out of my crouched position and apologized to everyone and told them that I would meet them in Alaska. Racing back to the car, I got in and speed away, left completely alone to my thoughts, to Bella.

I know that I had no right to go see, as it was me that caused her all that pain but, I couldn't help myself. I wanted to commit her to my memory, even if it meant that she would haunt me for all eternity, it was after all, what I deserved.

She was lying on her bed, her body being racked by sobs; she had the lullaby that I created for her, going on the stereo. And when it stopped, she stopped crying for a second, to turn and put it on again. I hated seeing her like this, but I knew I couldn't take it back now and I had no right to either, Bella deserved so much better. She deserved to be with a guy that she could actually be with. Someone that would never leave her that could never hurt even if it was by accident or because he was trying to do what was best for her. And I truly hope that she finds that guy, but mostly I wish it was me.

"I keep asking myself, wondering how
I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out
Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me
nobody else so we can be free
nobody else so we can be free."

As I was about to go I heard a car pull silently up. If I had been for attention I probably would have realized someone was coming much sooner. Scared of being I quickly jumped on the roof, but there I saw Alice and Jasper, staring at me sadly.

"Jasper, he wants to say goodbye to Bella one more time, put her to sleep please." Alice said calmly to Jasper, who simply nodded and then vanished, going through her window.

I was always shocked at how close Alice and Jasper were to each other. Neither had the actual gift to talk to people through their minds, it just seemed that they had got to point where they knew each other so well it was like they could talk to one another. I was so impressed by that I had often hoped that one day Bella and I get to that point too; then again it would help if I could even just read her mind. But then again when I told her I was leaving, for once I was happy, because I would hate to have heard what was going through her mind to make her body crumble completely like it.

"She's asleep now, it's not exactly deep, but it's the bets that I could do." Jasper told us as rejoined us on the roof. "So be quick Edward."

I didn't need anything other incentive and I was in the window in less than a second. As I moved over to Bella, I couldn't help but overhear Jasper go to Alice, "Not that he has any right to."

"I know what you mean Jasper, and he knows to, but even thought his seems like the worst possible way for Edward to try and protect and even though he's doing more damage to her this way, he's trying to do what's right. Even if it is totally wrong." She told him sighing. "I'm just hoping that it won't take him too long to see the error of his ways, because Bella is definitely in for a rough time."

"All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
Running through my head
(Running through my head)
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
(All the things she said)
This is not enough
This is not enough"

Taking my attention from them, because if they said anything else about how stupid I was being, I would seriously reconsider for fifty millionth time already about leaving and I knew I couldn't do that. No matter how bad they thought Bella was going to react, I know that some how she would be ok, or at least I hoped.

Finding a piece of spare paper, I scribbled a fast note and left it on her bedside table. Then I gathered all the things that would remind of me of her, such as her strawberry shampoo, weird I know yes, but it was part of her that drove me crazy and hopefully something that would keep me sane as I pined for her for the rest of my life. I also took a couple of photos that showed Bella at her best and then last of all swiped a t-shirt or two, ones that she had worn recently and still had her scent lingering on them.

Then I turned Bella, the goddess of my dreams, and gently laid my lips on her, feeling the lovely warmth, that I craved with every fiber of body, before taking my last glance at her and then I was gone. Out of her life just like that.

"And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame
When they stop and stare - don't worry me
'Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head"

"Edward, please reconsider. Go back to her tell her it was all a lie. That you love her that you always have." Alice begged of me, after seeing another vision which I blocked from my mind, not wanting to know what was going on with my Bella, as it would be too hard for me to try and pretend that what I had done was right.

"NO ALICE!" I yelled, not wanting to go down this same path for the tenth time this day.

"Edward you'll regret not listening to me, mark my words one day you'll wish you had listened to me." Alice yelled at me, while poking me in the chest before finally walking off, with Jasper following right behind her and then Rosalie and Emmet too.

I looked at Esme and Carlisle, the only people left in the room, to see if they too were going to desert me too.

"Esme?"

"Mother looking at me
tell me what do you see?
Yes, I've lost my mind"

"I'm sorry Edward, but I just can't lie to you and say that I agree with what you've done. I just can't." Esme said sadly, walking away.

"Carlisle? Please, tell me you agree with me. Tell me what I did was right. Please?" I asked him, my voice cracking under all of the emotions.

"Daddy looking at me
will I ever be free?
Have I crossed the line?"

"No, I'm sorry son, but what you did was not right. It furthest thing from being right." And with that he left me alone too and I only myself to blame.

Oh Bella what have I done? Putting my hands to my head, I sank into my couch, remembering all the wonderful times that I had once experienced with Bella.

Flashback

"Edward?" Bella whispered, as I sat with her on my lap in silence, content with just listening to her heart beat.

"Yes, Bella?"

"I love you." She whispered softly." And I always will."

"The same goes for me Bella, you're my life now." I whispered back, kissing her on the nape of her neck.

"I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I'd do it a thousand times over, just to be with you."

"No Bella, I don't deserve you."

End of FlashBack

"All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said
All the things she said
All the things she said
All the things she said
All the things she said
All the things she said."