A/N: Okay, so, right now I have like two adoring friends reading this thing, so this is all for them so far... Want it to be for you too? Make me aware you are reading this - please review.

Disclaimer: South Park is not mine, so stop hounding me! No, just joking, you. Everyone knows Matt and Trey did it - Matt Stone, not Matt Groening. Animals, as stated in the chapter, is owned by Nickelback. The quote is a line from the song that cracks up my friends. I, on the other hand, like the song because of it's story. Besides, the part where she's screaming, "Oh, God, that's my dad outside the car!" is much funnier. Motorola is... Motorola. Pop Tarts are owned by Pillsbury. His boots are T-U-K. Tits are owned by girls.

When the World Comes Down…

A South Park Tale.

Chapter Three

"And you control how fast we go by just how hard you squeeze!"

Another three minutes later, at the run down side of town, a cell phone was busy blaring "Animals" by Nickelback. From beneath a giant flop of brown bed sheets a corner was raised just enough for Kenny McCormick's boney wrist and spidery hand to shoot out and snatch the beastly device beneath the covers…

"What do you want!!" snapped the blond with an 'it's too early' underline framing his voice like barbed wire. He rolled around so his face was in the pillow as he waited impatiently for the still silent creature to elaborate their unnecessary contact. 'This had better be a hot chick,' he decided.

"Kenny? Dude, are you coming to school? It's incredibly boring standing here alone."

'Kyle. Damn.' There was a flustered string of apologies and irritated cuss words heard coming from the purple Motorola. "Phit! 'Id Ah shih hat ouhlouh?" The poverty-stricken boy asked. The pillow muffled his words, go figure. "Ah whss hnkhn abouh tihhs!" He knew it was probably too early to be vulgar, but he would have sworn by that a million times before implying that he didn't want to hang out with Kyle – not many people were jumping to be his friend.

"Kenny, I know most of what you are saying, but it's been ages since you wore your hood up. Please take it off to talk… Did you say tits?" He laughed at the last part, in contrast to his very tired tone at the beginning. Blushing, Kenny shot his head up from the pillow – quite gladly since it was getting hard to breath.

"Sorry dude, and that wasn't my beloved hood, that was my pillow… Yeah, tits, why? Are you still afraid of them, my dear inexperienced homo?" Letting out a chuckle, Kenny rolled off the bed and onto the floor – literally. He slowly made his way over to the closet where his few shirts and bottoms were laying in a sloppy pile on the floor, tattered jacket the only thing hanging.

"Wha-? You butt-munch! I am not a fairy! I'm as straight as a pin! I do nothing to even—wait. What do you mean your pillow?! You should be up and moving, you lazy piece of poop! You have five minutes to get here-" an exaggeration "-before the bus arrives and that Hispanic man yells that you're SOL in Spanish! Stan's probably still washing his skinny little butt and he won't pick up his cell so I can yell at him! Get over here!!"

Kenny smiled with a small shrug but then realized that Kyle could not hear the gesture and verbalized the action, "Yeah, whatever, I'm as good as there, dude." With that, the mop-top flipped his cell closed and yanked on his anorak. He stood up, and attempted to open his door… Only to find it stuck. He rattled the door for a good thirty seconds before he finally glared at the blasted cheap wood and raised his T-U-K Black Action Leather boot and smashed it into the door. He stared at the damage and pointedly decided that he would leave it there – as if finally deciding on whether to have the turkey sub or the tomato soup. He was in a pissy mood from being woken up and it would have just fallen down sooner or later.

Calling out to whoever was home and sober enough to process the information that he was leaving for school, Kenny grabbed a Pop Tart left from the previous night's dinner and attacked it via mouth. He stomped through the run down house to get to the front door – which was in about the same shape as his bedroom door – and sloshed through the snow towards the bent up sign that he could just barely see; a green little head elevated by an orange torso with black and green limbs stood next to it. The slacker gave a cheeky smile, 'That OCD pretty boy, always being punctual.'

Sok~Munki: I enjoy how he just kicks the door down. It's definitely something he would do. The pillow was just ironic. You should check out my DeviantART account. I'm getting that in motion as well - six pictures on there, what? I'm the type of person who needs encouragement to continue writing or drawing something. Seriously. My friend, asked for a picture for Christmas. They had to twist my arm behind my back for me to work on it.

Thank you to AIISA,D and Silvertails for the chapter title idea!

Procrastination - I would have been the one to invent it, but I became too lazy.

99 Lives by The Pettit Project (now called Love you To Death) is a kick ass song. You should get hooked on it. Kenny did. He danced. He sang. But he'll forever be a cookie whore, haha!