Author's Note:

yeah...9 months...

uhm...i can explain.

...not really. DX but i can try! the truth is, i've been having a tough time writing lately. i now it's not a very solid excuse, but it's all i have. i'm sorry. again. ugh. still, 9 months of waiting! 9 months of being on withdrawl from this story! hm. to think that some lady had her baby while i've been gone. xO

ah, but it does feel good to be back to FF. i'm trying with the best of my ability to get back here and update, again as best as i can! but i'm starting to get a TAD worried, what with the hardest grade of my life coming up in less than a week now. DX hm. but i suppose i can try, right?

would you like to know what inspired me to finish writing this chapter? hm? anyone? anyone? AHH. THE DARK KNIGHT. so, i gotta ask, for all you people who are ultimately pissed at me now:

"WHY SO SERIOUSSSS!? HEEHAHAHAHOHOHEE!!" (bad joker impression is bad...)

...i hope you guys enjoy reading! hm. i wonder about that title now. SOMEONE SAVE YOURSELF. xO

Chapter 8: Bang, Bang

Growing up alone, it was accustomed to Roxas the sight of pain as well as the feeling—both physical and mental. Without a guiding hand, he was pretty much left to discover how the world turned on his own which typically resulted in either a cut or a bruise that which many of the other children rarely had to suffer through. Often he would hurt himself—of course unintentionally—in the process of cleaning, building, cooking even. He had learned from many mistakes and he had always tried his hardest to fix them although there really was no one to impress.

That must have been the reason his mistakes were so frequent.

But he persisted to try and used what knowledge he had to clean up a mess that he hadn't even started. It might not have been his mistake and it might not have been right to become involved, but he had to at least make certain that another person's slip ups wouldn't repeat like his. The least he could do was hold out his hand. If only for a minute.

xxXXxx

Axel's wounds had been hidden from the rest of the crew. As soon as the mini ordeal on deck had ended, Roxas made sure to first tend to the captain before swabbing the deck like the good cabin boy that he was. By the time all traces of blood had been washed overboard, Roxas slipped back into Axel's room without another word and without the slightest idea of the time of day. It had been too foggy outside to tell.

Nearly an hour perhaps had passed before Roxas could hear the muffled grunting and scuffling of feet on deck. He yawned and tried to let the crew's noises stay out of his head. Below him was Axel—lying with his back facing the ceiling so that his gashes would heal properly. He'd been unconscious ever since the fog had dissipated a bit and all Roxas could do as cabin boy was keep a close watch over him until he'd stir. As if that would be a good thing. He'd only be sent back down to the brig no doubt.

He groaned on that thought and buried his face in the palms of his hands while resting his elbows on his knees. Who was he kidding? A cabin boy aiding to the captain of the ship...this was madness. And, of all things, he had to be intimate with Axel. If he didn't live through this ship ride, he prayed that he'd be thrown overboard and left for the sea to with him as it pleased.

Needless to say Roxas was absolutely ashamed in himself. Absolutely.

"Sora," he mumbled after turning his head toward the faint sunlight peeking through Axel's dirty window, "help me."

He'd just shut his eyes when he felt the bedding at his back shift and groan. Sure enough, when Roxas peered over his shoulder, there Axel was with his head resting over his folded arms and his eyes positively hazy and indistinct. Roxas instantly rose to his feet and looked down at Axel, not much because he was worried, but because, well...he had a feeling that they needed to have a little talk.

"Sir," the blonde uttered under his breath. Axel hadn't looked up right away, and for a moment stared off into space before finally snapping into reality. He blinked and just barely managed to turn his head upward to look at, ah, the cabin boy it seemed. He smirked slowly and surveyed the boy through narrowed eyes.

"Hmhm. Hello, Roxas. Morning already?" he asked lasciviously.

Roxas looked away from the captain's stare and nodded his head once, his hands fisted at his sides. "Yes...sir."

"The crew? Tell me what they're doing."

"Out on the deck. All of them are accounted for and working as you want." Roxas' voice remained monotonous, and in honesty he didn't like the feeling. His voice was starting to sound and even feel like it was no longer his own, but one of a slave. A desolate, deteriorating slave.

Axel began to chuckle although it made his chest throb with pain. He didn't twitch, barely made a sound as the pain rippled through his ribcage and down his spine. Ah, he'd felt this pain before, he thought. Same old bastard gave it to him again. Hm. Thinking back on that strange meeting, Axel's eyebrows lifted and he carefully began to shift his body, to which Roxas looked back in mild concern.

"Mind telling me how you learned t'...mend wounds, Roxas?" Axel asked as he turned and lay on his side to face the boy correctly. Roxas widened his eyes a bit and shrugged.

"It came growing up."

"Hm. See, now, this is one of the reasons why I keep you here to live, Roxas. You're a special one, you know."

Roxas looked off to the side again and after a few more seconds of delay, completely turned his back on Axel and crossed his arms in defiance. "Tell me why I'm special, then. I think I reserve the right to know."

Once again Axel's laughter echoed in the sunlit room. The sounds of the waves were less today, and even the crew sounded less rambunctious than usual. Roxas guessed that something in the fog altered everything. Sadly, his memories seemed to be intact and working, as did all of Axel. Dammit

"...Do you know just how greedy you are, Roxas?"

The blonde didn't answer. No, he was here to listen. And so he remained unmoving in the same position.

"It's come to my attention that no one is aware of the level of greed in their body. Regardless of your person, you have greed. It's what we were each born with, you know. And something else? Hah. It's not us who channel it."

Roxas' fingers twitched upon hearing Axel's voice dropping to a strangely familiar tone—similar to one he'd heard only last night.

The redhead continued, this time trying his best to sit upright in the process. "Ah—Our greed is...like a time bomb. It sits, waiting for one infinitesimal action to set it off, and when it does we can either choose to let it destroy us from the inside, or let it escape and taint others. When you're jealous, Roxas, do you ever feel like you're still being yourself? Even for a second? Are you still you?"

"I—I don't know."

"And you know why you don't?" The bed squeaked just as Axel finally sat himself on the edge of it. He stared down at his feet while he went on to say, "The very person who gave you greed is the same who manipulates it."

"You mean to tell me that my body is being operated...By a—by a—Like I'm some sort of puppet?"

"You catch on quickly, boy."

"So—so I'm not—wait, wait," Roxas stuttered and stared down at his palms, opening and closing them unintentionally in deep thought. "That doesn't answer my question at all."

"Oh? Doesn't it?" Axel asked playfully, glancing up at the back of Roxas' head.

"No. If this is pertaining to greed, I can't be special or of any benefit to this crew if I'm just as greedy like everyone else. It's like you just said! How, sir, am I interesting to you!?"

Anger was clearly beginning to drip over Roxas' words as he turned back toward the bed and faced the weak and unstable captain with his blue eyes flashing in demand. Well, Axel sat perfectly still with his hands gripping onto the edge of the bed and his head still turned down. Roxas wasn't looking for Axel's eyes, but was staring at his bandaged torso moving ever-so-slightly with his breathing.

He knew, for once, he was at least pleased to see that the captain was breathing.

Roxas couldn't see it, but Axel had parted his lips and began to mouth the words to some pirate song yet again. Halfway through, he slowly raised his head, locked his emerald eyes with the cabin boy and replied:

"Believe what you wish, Roxas. Hm. But unlike the others...you'll be the one to save me."

xxXXxx

Nearly an entire month had flown by since Roxas had joined Axel's crew against his will. And all that while, he still hadn't grown comfortable with salt water and still hadn't softened up to falling asleep on the soggy floorboards of the brig. Yes, it was just as he suspected: as soon as Axel and his conversation some weeks ago had ended on an awkward note, Roxas was immediately taken down to the brig by none other than Luxord.

If he were just a bit taller, he had a feeling that he'd be able to knock that stupid gambler to the floor.

Luxord hadn't asked about Axel's wounds, merely because Axel prohibited him to. And because Luxord was immensely loyal, to Roxas' surprise he didn't spread the word around the ship. To his surprise again, Axel resumed duty as captain on the deck the following day with his same black outfit covering the red markings on his back. He'd peeled off the bandages that Roxas had tied.

Hm. All that stupid work for nothing.

But something was oddly out of place about Axel after that incident. It seemed that Roxas was the only one to notice aside from the captain himself. First, the necklace with the rusted key was gone. Last, his sword sheath was left without the double bladed sword. Roxas couldn't help but think about this and Axel's distorted words every day he spent with his back against the wall down in his salty confinement.

"You'll be the one to save me."

He scratched his head and kept his eyes tightly shut. Nope. Hadn't gotten used to sea sickness either. All this thinking wasn't helping at all.

On top of this misery, Roxas had been doomed in solitary confinement for what he suspected to be a week now. He hadn't seen the full light of day in weeks, and Roxas honestly feared that it was taking a toll on his psyche. The most he ever got to light were the thin yellow strings that poked through the cracks in the boat. They sat very still and fragile beside him, only to vanish before he could admire them.

With his back slack against the iron bars of his cell, Roxas opened his eyes and to his surprise spotted a shadow cast before him on the opposite wall.

"Huh?"

He heard light footsteps descending the familiar stairs at his back and when they drew closer, he spun on an impulse and squinted at the dark figure moving under the sunlight.

"Who—?"

"Me. Demyx."

Roxas had to think for a second before he finally remembered a face to go with the name. Right. The strange guy with the...rum, was it? Ah, he nearly forgot all about Blue. That stupid island. Now that he thought about it, maybe turning down Axel's offer to stay there a bit longer was a bad idea. His heavy eyes stung as they tried to adjust to the light and get a better look at Demyx's face.

"What're you doing here?"

Demyx inched closer toward the cell and grabbed onto one of the bars nearest Roxas' fingers. Roxas stared at it while Demyx proceeded to explain himself.

"Came to tell you we saw land! We're anchored in a cove!" he said eagerly. Roxas didn't look too amazed. Ch, they'd spotted land every week now, and each time they did Axel made some men disembark and pillage for ammunition and whatever the bloody hell pirates loved most. Never women, for some reason.

He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. See, acting this way was fine around Demyx. There wasn't a spot of authority in him to worry about.

"So? We've seen land a lot recently, right? Something...special about this little discovery?"

Demyx released a high pitched giggle into the dark room and replied, "You bet. It's a huge town this time."

"Don't we already have enough ammuni—?"

"Fun, Roxas. This time the whole crew is goin' on shore. Wouldn't 'spect that from the captain, right? He said that we're gonna do this one for pleasure—just like when we found you!"

The blonde scoffed on the thought and turned away from the avid Demyx with a cold shoulder. "Fun for you, yeah."

"Ha, that's easy for you t' say. I'm sure if you got out there and—"

"I'm not allowed, Demyx," Roxas hissed, shooting a sharp glance over his shoulder. "Since Blue, Axel said I can't set foot on land, remember? I...I can't do that." He lowered his head and began to nibble on his lower lip anxiously. Secretly, he wanted Demyx to reply with something along the lines of he'd gotten an order from higher up that broke that prohibition just this once. Alas...no.

Demyx simply shrugged, heaved a sigh and turned his back to the boy. "You know, I'd get you outta there..."

Roxas shook his head solemnly and quietly moved toward the back of the cell where he spotted that old coconut sitting where he usually sat. He kicked it out of the way and sent it rolling toward the cell door, only this time when it hit it, the door wouldn't budge.

"Anyway, you're idea of fun is miles away from mine."

With those words, Demyx stared at the cabin boy, stared at the cell door and finally withdrew into the light dripping down the stairway. Roxas tried not to look at it and felt strangely relieved when Demyx shut the door behind him and left the brig flooded with cold black once more. Odd. Demyx...actually looked serious about bending the rules. No, no.

From the appearance of the light, Roxas could tell that it had to be some minutes past sunset. And from the sounds behind his wall, Demyx had been telling the truth when he said this was a big town. All those people, horses, shallow water, mothers...He didn't want to listen too intently, though. All those busy sounds would just bring him back to his home.

Hm. Home.

Home...

Home...

"Listen here, all of you! Captain's orders are as follows: go ashore, take all you want and kill all you can. Leave no person standing if that be the case. The fewer eyes we have, the better, understand? Now the ship will remain here in the cove, so don't be expecting any of the townies to find her. You know what to do."

"Ha-ha-HA! A real treat for us, ey?"

"Don't leave your pistol dry, Xigbar. You'll never hear the end of it if you do."

"Really? You think?"

"You're the captain's head of arms, huh? Miss a shot, lose all your bullets and he'll be laughing all the way to his grave. Ha-ha..."

"Who said anything 'bout guns, Marly? Come on, now. You bring the knives to this sort of place."

"Reason being?"

"Ha-ha-ha...simple. Ya get t' see the look in their faces. Too quick...with a gun. It's boring. Besides, you seen the layout of the town? Highly doubt they've even heard of a pistol, let alone a dagger!"

"Hm. You're a terrible sadist."

"Me? Nah. I just know how t' have a good time."

"Of course...Of course. Oh, by the way."

"What's that?"

"You dealt with the cabin boy's cell like we planned?"

"Wouldn't be much of a pirate if I didn't."

"Ah, the captain should be in for a wonderful time like the rest of us."

"Yeah. Him an' that cabin boy. Ha-ha-ha-HA!"

xxXXxx

"I'm not fighting. I'm just testing. Riku found this one out at the coves a couple weeks ago and had me fix it up. Neat, huh? Think it might've been from a pirate shi—"

"What is it you want, boy? Tell me what you want."

"Trust me!"

"...Do you know just how greedy you are, Roxas?"

"Tell me what you want..."

"Greed treats every one of its victims equally..."

"The very person who gave you greed is the same who manipulates—"

"WHAT IS IT YOU WANT, BOY!?"

"Mmm—you—DON'T—!" Dripping in cold sweat, Roxas forced his eyes open and frantically searched the darkness of his cell while still lying with bated breath on the floor. When he was sure that he was alone, he brought a hand to his forehead and kept it there while he tried to calm himself down. Another nightmare. More voices he couldn't give a face to.

Minutes passed before Roxas decided that it hurt to be lying down so long and he sat upright with his legs crossed, facing the rusty door once again. He looked toward his right and found that there was no light poking through the crevices in the wall...which usually meant...

"Nighttime?" he panted and knelt down on his knees to get a better look at the world outside through the largest crack in the wall. Sure enough, the ocean appeared pitch black and the small sliver of the moon was already touching the horizon. Roxas pushed away from the wall and rubbed the back of his neck in thought.

Something...didn't feel quite right. Earlier he didn't feel like he had to be outside, now his body was on the verge of collapsing if he didn't. This was a need now! He had to be out there, even if it was night. Even if it was dark and freezing...he had to go. Roxas needed connection; he needed sound, touch...something human!

But as he got to his feet and made a mad dash for the door, he paused in his tracks and rubbed his throat as if he'd said something all wrong. This was odd. Going against the rules? Roxas, no. No, listen to yourself, Roxas. Would you rather die?

But the more his mind raced, the more Roxas began to think it insane. It wasn't fair that he had to be held captive despite all he'd done on this ship. His hard work—blood, sweat, all of it he'd sacrificed. And even the damn captain! He thought they were on better terms...

Roxas' eyes sparked as his fingers coiled tighter around the bars of the door. He gave it a rough shake and kicked it sharply with his toes. It felt like fire was ripping through his veins—like it was taking over his body, making him nothing but a marionette on two spider web thin strings.

"Let. Me. Out!" Roxas growled to himself as his fingers clawed at the iron in desperation. It wasn't quite clear what he wanted. Revenge? Shelter? Human contact? Words? Sagacity?

And so with one final kick, one hinge to Roxas' door let off a piercing shriek and tiny sparks flew and it unlatched from the cell and left the door hanging open at an awkward angle. For a moment, Roxas' eyes widened in shock at what he'd just done, but that quickly subsided as he took a quick glance around and made for the stair way like a madman.

Up on deck, Roxas realized that he was the only one left on the ship. So what Demyx had said was true—the entire crew was in for a night of pleasure. All on Axel, of course. Still, he kept 

his steps light and even so as not to disturb any trap that Axel was very likely to have placed. The blonde adjusted one of the black ribbons around his wrists and with narrowed eyes looked out over the edge. There he saw the town lit up with life through a large hole in a rock structure which encompassed the entire ship, keeping her from the town's eyes.

His lips parted in awe of the sight and even more when he spotted black smoke billowing out of one corner of the town in particular. It was all too familiar. So familiar in fact that Roxas figured he now had more reason to go. The new town was bigger than his home, but already Roxas' eyes spotted many similarities. Now, it didn't look like he was too far from the shore either. To Roxas' surprise, should he decide to jump from here, making it to shore would be barely a swim. Barely.

"I want this..."

On that, the blonde inhaled sharply and peered over the ship's side at the water. It was still, thankfully, and without his typical second thought to trouble him, Roxas set foot onto the railing and leapt head first into the waiting sea below. As his body slowly sank toward the bottom, his body tingled and his hands clenched...

This was the closest to home he would ever be.

xxXXxx

For a while, Roxas really did consider rolling around on the sand like he had done on Blue after some good rum. After all, he really did feel drunk, more his mind than his body. Thinking clearly wasn't working out tonight, and while Roxas knew this, he still persisted and set foot onto shore panting and with a weak smile on his face. He felt the wind pushing him—at his back, at his front. The sounds! More than just waves! Footsteps, dogs, doors opening, shouting...

Elated out of his mind, Roxas opened his eyes and ruffled up his hair upon taking his first step on land in ages. His legs wobbled only slightly but after retaining his balance, he slowly broke into a solid walk toward what appeared to be the entrance to the town. From where he stood, the beach was covered in a large shadow of a poorly built wall which must've been placed as some sort of protection.

"Hm. Never had a pirate attack, have you?" Roxas whispered toward the wall as he approached it. But because he was so engrossed in staring at it, Roxas was completely oblivious to what was going on elsewhere. This immediately caused him to trip over something hard at his feet, sending him stumbling with a sore foot and eventually onto his stomach.

"Damn," he grated out as he brushed sand out of his hair. At first it appeared to be driftwood that he'd hit, but after a closer look Roxas made it out to be a lone gun with its end pointing in his direction. He stared into it and almost immediately this triggered an image of Sora in his mind...

The blonde turned his head toward his feet and sniffled once. But no matter how many times he tried to make his words come out, they became trapped in his throat. With each try, Roxas grew frustrated and eventually he turned on the gun, kicked back sand over its silver surface and broke into a run as he entered the town. The smell of smoke was thick and it nearly stung his eyes as he rushed past home after home down this long and dim street.

All the while, his smile was still on his face.

...And all the while...he was watched.

"Mm. Not a good idea for you to be running, Roxas...You know how bad it is for you."

Click, click.

"Turned down your own pistol in the sand, too, hm? Tsk, tsk. Not all too bright of you either."

Click, click...

"Running into an unknown city without a weapon..."

Click, click...click.

"...And against...my word?"

Slowly—just as the boy was halfway down the deserted street—the redhead peeled away from his hiding spot against the wall and tilted his head curiously as he watched Roxas drift further and further away from him. The tip of his tongue ventured out from between his parted lips as he remembered just what Roxas was...who he was. How he was. Hm. He licked his upper lip leisurely and rolled his head back...thinking of those boy's lips.

But he didn't smile. He barely breathed. All he did was stare forward...until finally he lifted his arm...

...and quickly took aim.

"...This was not meant...for you."

Bang.

DON'T DO IT, AXEL! DON'T DO IT. AHHHHH. THINK OF...of, ah. uhm. yeah. let's stick with think of roxas in general. XO

you guys, i'm having SERIOUS issues with my hands right now. mmm. i think my carpal tunnel is acting up again. well, that's the life of a writer, i guess. and i've been working around the clock with each of my multi-chapter stories so that doesn't help at all! honestly, what COMPELLED ME TO SUBMIT ALL OF THEM SO CLOSE TO ONE ANOTHER LIKE THIS?? mmm...

well, enough of that. onto something else. xO as i mentioned earlier, yes; the DARK KNIGHT made me write this tonight. ok, not the actual dark knight himself, but the freakin' ass kickin' movie, that's what. i really don't feel like retyping my review for it here, so if you stalk me at DA you can read about it there. (likely as not. XD) let's just say that, ah, my inner fangirl was on the verge of dying in a good way, and, uhm...i'm guilty as charged for thinking naughty things involving JOKER X BATMAN.

(shut up, i was having fun. XO)

ah. for some reason, a lot of people are comparing axel with the joker online! has anyone else SEEN this? i mean, sure, it makes sense a tad, but it's not exactly axel, you know what i mean? hm...maybe i'm just thinking to hard. or maybe i'm just being a hypocrite again. (i mean, psh, i have him as a freakin' PIRATE OVER HERE, HELLO? XO) so, yeah. i saw the dark knight (AWFUL TITLE) today! or rather yesterday since it's one AM right now...CRAP. i really want to be able to mimick the joker's laugh. SERIOUSLY. i'd meet loads of sexy men if i could do that...in bed? xO LAME.

anyway! hope that this chapter compensated even a LITTLE for the time i've been away. again, i'm going to try the best i can this school year, but for now we can only wait an see. (honestly, i'm REALLY hecka excited to update the next chapter, so it shouldn't be too far away, m'kay? oh, right. -pelvic thrust-)

...LET'S PUT A SMILE ON THAT FACE,
kokoro77