Author's Note: this is so pathetic, you guys. uhm, uhm, uhm OK. so, do ya remember a couple years back when i went on this totally awesome yet annoying trip to asia?? and i was kinda sorta on hiatus on all my on-going stories? and yet i still managed to upload chapters in week intervals?? remember that?

well, ah, 'kay, so, i'm in asia right now...i've been here for the past three weeks...and GOD I'M LEAVING TOMORROW. WHAT THE FUCK!? DX

i've been getting on the internet even LESS than the last time i was here, at which time i was only able to get on the internet, oh, every other day or so, but NOW i can only get on at least every week! WEEK. DO YOU--DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY I'M GOING CRAZY? this girl runs on internet connection, OK? -dies inside-

...ok. deep breath time. ...now, in my absense, i've been working as best i can on this story in particular, mostly because it's the only one that easiest to work with. i have a strange mind. and, ah, interesting factoid: as i was typing this chapter up, there was, like, a HORDE of ants crawling over my screen and i flipped out and took a phonebook and smashed 'em all. DX then there were some that crawled out of NOWHERE on my laptop and on my fingers, so i had to smash my laptop to the point where i thought it would break in half. ...anyway! enough of ants! i think they're all dead now...AH.

time to get back to the bedtime story! OMGHAPPYNEWYEARANDCHRISTMAS!

Chapter 12: Once Upon a Time

"Naughty?" Roxas asked as if he'd just heard the word for the first time in his life. Well, coming from Axel the word wasn't all too surprising—the bastard was egotistical, so negative words always sounded fantastic when he used them to talk about himself. No, it wasn't the word that confused Roxas, but the way he'd said it...but he'd save that thought for another day. In the meantime, Roxas tried to envision a younger version of the captain—with shorter hair, perhaps. Maybe his face was rounder or his eyes were bigger. He figured the image would help him see this story better.

Axel, who had since leaned back, continued his story with his fingers intertwined in his lap. "See, as a child without parents I lived without discipline for most of my life. I was free to do what ever I pleased. Ah, now, when they came ashore...I became a new person."

"They?" Roxas asked, leaning in closer.

The redhead scoffed at the blonde's sudden interest and after he'd moved his lips closer to Roxas's ear he carefully replied:

"Pirates." And with that word Roxas shivered as if he'd never heard that before.

"They went ashore one night I happened to be out late strolling around town." Axel leaned away from the boy and stared out at the pink tinted water which was ebbing and sparkling before sunrise. "Killed anything that moved, they did. The women, kids—all of 'em. But there was something they didn't do that I always thought a pirate did during pillage, you know. They hadn't...stolen anything. Left all the guns in the storage, all the expensive whatnot here and there.

So I thought it would be a smart idea to hide where they weren't looking—storage places that clearly weren't worth their time. See, that's where I was wrong. Pirates always do the unexpected, you should know. They set the town on fire, Roxas! All of it!" Axel clapped his hands and upon separating them he clenched them into fists.

"So there was nowhere to hide, you see. And in the end, those pirates found me."

"What'd they do?" the blonde asked, lowering his head.

"You'd think they'd kill me. But, see, it was their captain that found me, so he had the say in what would happen. 'Course, not many people aside from the officials in town carried weapons with them, so seeing that I—a boy—had a gun strapped to my waist caught his attention...He ordered I be brought on board."

The story sounded all too familiar to Roxas...strangely enough. He briefly glanced at the disturbed sand where Axel had drawn nonsense earlier.

"Next thing I know I'm being dragged away from this town by two of the captain's men. I don't know what they're planning, don't know what in the bloody hell these men even are, and finally they toss me onto that ship like I'm nothing but cargo. Hm. You know, looking out at that town burnin' up like that, there wasn't a doubt in my mind that everyone I'd known had died.

And yet I kept a straight face, Roxas. And I had a gun. For whatever reason that interested the ship's captain. Me! Hah! Just a boy unfit for pirate duties—it's what I was. But you know what the captain says to me? Know what he says? He stares at me straight in the eye while I'm being held by the arms by his two men, smiles at me this wicked smile and tells me I fascinate him."

Roxas's eyebrow rose at that and nervously he fiddled with the makeshift bandage around his torso. No, no, this story was too familiar. And yet, Axel didn't seem to see that. As soon as he'd mentioned the captain's eyes, Axel fixed his gaze directly into Roxas's baby blues, leaving the boy in a state of hypnosis. With that, Roxas couldn't turn away.

"...So I was forced to join this crew. Cap'n never said why—just said that I fascinated him, hm? You wonder what he meant?"

Roxas shook his head slowly to which Axel scoffed.

"Time passed and I was kept in the brig." Axel's face seemed to grimace thinking about that and, in truth, it amused Roxas, but he had to hold back his smile. "I was maybe a little older than you when I was made part of the crew. I was already feeling older than I should've been. Every day he had me doing something on deck—swabbing, test shooting, patching and all that. And at the end of the day, if I was lucky...he just left me t' sit in the dark of that old cell for some personal time. Hah! But you know...the day came when I finally saw light. See..."

"Hm?" Roxas asked, his eyes bright and wide.

The captain turned his head up toward the sky, smirked and as he shook his head his voice lowered to say:

"He made me in charge of the crew. Not captain," he added quickly, "but the one in charge of overseeing 'em. Literally his right hand man."

The blonde's face fell blank at that. "But...why?" Hell, if Axel was given a position of authority for just tidying then Roxas should've been granted the same a long time ago! Axel had even said so himself! Roxas made a good captain! Imagine that.

Axel chuckled and replied, "Apparently the simple act of me brandishing a weapon gave me authority. For some reason I was seen as..." He lifted two fingers and made quotation marks in the air before adding, "Bossy."

"You're saying he used you?"

Axel paused, knitting his eyebrows as he pondered the question, and nibbled on his lower lip before replying. "That's a terrible word, Roxas," he muttered sincerely. "But, I won't deny that it's true nor will I deny that I enjoyed it. But isn't that what power does to people? Hm? Isn't that secretly...what everyone wants? A little game, a little control." He locked eyes with Roxas again as he asked the questions with a lowering tone of voice.

"I didn't care that he used me to do his dirty work. In fact, hm...I didn't much care about what the captain wanted anymore. Roxas. Listen." Axel's voice had become so hushed that Roxas had to lean in closer to hear. When he could feel the redhead breathing down his neck Roxas took in a deep breath and awaited the rest of the story.

"...He made a mistake. I made a mistake. See, him accepting me was like...putting his crew in danger, if you will. You're absolutely right about him using me, you know. What he does, Roxas, is finds what turns you on. He finds what makes your pulse race, your eyes burn...and once he's found it he uses it against you. What he found in me was that I liked control. I loved control a bit too much...and that was all he needed to destroy me."

"As in kill you? L-like—you're one of those undead?"

Axel quickly shook his head. "No, no, I'm not undead, idiot."

Roxas bit his tongue at that. Embarrassing...

Axel rolled his eyes and continued. "I'd never learned much about him, and in the end I misjudged him. My obsession with power, my obsession with myself...both fueled me and eventually cursed me. You remember when I asked you about jealousy, Roxas?"

The blonde nodded and afterward cringed as the wound at his side stung. He managed to keep his face straight, knowing that if he'd show pain Axel would stop talking and start ripping up clothes again.

"That's just it. I was being consumed by greediness, and pretty soon I'd lost myself. You would've thought a pirate to love greed and selfishness. You would've thought this captain would accept me. Hm. No, no, this was all part of his little game. He confronted me one night and scolded me for being that kind of overseer: the kind that pushed boys to the limit and sometimes killed them for good show. And d'you know what he did then?"

Again, the blonde shook his head.

"...He told me that if I wanted power so much...he'd make me captain. I'd get his ship! What wasn't there to like 'bout that? But he tricked me! Cursed me! Said that because of my sin I would have to remain this ships' captain...until death. He made sure that I couldn't care for anyone else but myself, so I'd lost all of my feelings...happiness, excitement, contentment...Now all I have left is the bitter sting of greed, and you can't expect that to replace the happiness I used to have. Unless I can take a soul from land, a single soul from land, and somehow keep him alive and keep him free of selfishness, I'll be free again. If I could somehow change one person, I'd be free. Redemption. A soul to save my own.

...Ever since then I've been trying to find that one person. The one to save me. Hm. But I expected too much out of people. All the ones I brought aboard my ship failed within the first week. All those members of my crew? They're all failures. They're all people I tried to help in the past. And not one of them—not one—turned greed away. They just took greed by the hand, stared it in the eye, loved it, held it—all the damn bloody things in the world they gave to greed!

Xigbar stole items from the ship. Luxord and Demyx both abandoned ship and touched land. Larxene did the same—that is she abandoned us—and slept with a man in the city. Couldn't find 'er for three days. The rest either tried to steal my position away from me or merely abandoned ship. Doesn't matter what they do...it's greediness, selfishness either way. And no matter where that greed takes them, they always come back to me, hoping for another chance. But...they've already cursed themselves, so they've got to share the burden with me. Hm."

Roxas brought a hand to his head and slowly raked three fingers through his hair in thought. If what Axel was saying was true, then that meant...truly he wasn't a captain, but a prisoner. As the boy pressed on this thought, he couldn't help but notice how much he'd learned to gather himself up around the captain. He wasn't intimidated by him, nor did he feel so...small. In fact, more than anything, Roxas felt that Axel was just as much a cabin boy as he was. Captain? Is there really such thing as a position so great? Superiority? Did—did Axel really have that? How could he...if he was here, stranded on an unknown island, weaponless and without a ship and crew?

The blonde thought more, and realized that the only things that made Axel a captain were his gun, his ship and his curse.

Such meritless power...Why would people fight to earn that? Everyone wants power, but to gain it requires a sacrifice of one's dignity and individualism. There are people who serve under someone, ridding them of the will to do anything for themselves. It cancels this image of authority, and rather turns a person into nothing but a fink, a desperate person afraid to accept failure, who then attempts to hide their cowardice by enslaving others.

Then...Axel is a coward.

Roxas scoffed to the side and blankly eyed Axel at an angle. So this was the truth, huh? "...So, you really can't be saved, Axel."

Axel looked up from his lap and blinked up at Roxas. He raised an eyebrow and tilted his head in curiosity. "Really?" he asked, doubtfully. "Why do you say that?"

The blonde, after shutting his eyes and sighing to the ground, placed a hand over his bandaged wound and with a low voice muttered, "There is no such thing...as a person without greed. You even said so yourself, remember? You're out of luck." After he'd said it, the island seemed to fall into silence and all Roxas could do was clench his hand over his wound and bite his tongue. In a way, it'd hurt to say that, and he hadn't even said it directly to Axel's face. He wanted to make Axel feel hopeless. Ever since he'd met Axel, Roxas wanted him to fall. But, as he sat there and listened to the ebbing of the waves and the rustling of the wind in the trees, Roxas realized that silence from the captain wasn't as comforting and pleasing as he thought.

Actually, it was rather...depressing.

Way to rub salt in those wounds, Roxas.

He was still gripping onto the front of his bandages when he carefully looked up from the sand and tried to peek at Axel's face, just to see how exactly he'd taken that message. At first, Roxas really did expect the captain to disregard that information and would've merely stood up from the ground and cackled to himself. He expected cynical sentence after cynical sentence to counter his argument, he even expected Axel to prove him wrong with some card stuffed up his sleeve...

But no.

The captain sat there, quietly and with his head hanging over his lap as if he'd just fallen into a deep trance. Roxas couldn't see his face, and out of pure curiosity and, he had to admit, a bit of concern, he lowered his head to see what was going on with Axel. The sand around their bodies shifted as the blonde inched his body closer, closer...and finally he could see Axel's face and feel him breathing against his skin. Axel's eyes were unblinking, narrowed and dark; his lips were parted, still and it didn't appear as if he was breathing. Drips of salt water fell from loose strands of hair dangling over his eyes...lost eyes.

"...Sir?" Roxas's eyes softened as he scanned over Axel's face, but it didn't seem like his word got through. He felt like he had to do something now...but what?

It seemed like there was nothing...Roxas could do. Axel looked off to his left, away from Roxas and away from the ocean, and seemed to search for something of importance in the vast stretch of beach...but all he came up with were sand and open sky. He always knew this kid was smart, but it...really did hurt to know that Roxas knew the truth. On that thought, Axel pushed up from the ground and began to walk away from his companion with his back turned and his face completely straight and emotionless.

"I'll...look for a way off this place," the muttered over his shoulder, and continued on.

Roxas really did want to follow him, reach out and pull him back so that he could do something to undo his words. The truth hurts the receiver, but Roxas felt that it was attacking him as well.

He watched as the little shadow of the captain sauntered further and further away down the shoreline, leaving his footprints to be washed up by the incoming waves.

"...I don't know if I can save you...Axel."

xxXXxx

Roxas hadn't seen Axel for the remainder of the morning. For the most part, he'd been spending his time wandering the shore and lounging underneath palm trees. This island wasn't huge—he could peek through the trees and see the other side of the island easily, so he had a feeling that getting around here wouldn't be so bad. He should've been enjoying his time on land. The sun, the sand, the air...but instead he had to sulk around and feel miserable. He didn't understand it. He'd wanted this freedom, but because he'd received it by poor means, he wasn't so sure he was willing to grasp it at all.

The sun was setting by the time he'd arrived at a particular spot on the small island with large boulders and a few tide pools gathered around them. The sky had changed color so quickly from bright blue to deep orange and purple, but although the sight was comforting...Roxas didn't feel that way. He was...still alone. Aside from that, he was cold and weak both mentally and physically. Sigh.

"Too damn quiet here," he grumbled to his feet, kicking up a cloud of sand as he did. Since he wasn't wearing a shirt anymore, he had to keep his arms close to his chest to preserve heat. Night was falling faster than expected, and pretty soon Roxas would be consumed by darkness...cold and empty darkness. He shivered thinking about it and pulled his chin into his chest. He wasn't a huge fan of darkness, but—dare he say it—since he was a pirate he had to endure harsh circumstances.

On top of being uncomfortable with the environment, Roxas was uneasy at mind and heart. Too damn confused to set the world straight. Axel's story had been circling in his mind since their conversation ended and, he had to be honest, ever since the captain had left he had the urge to find him again. What a feeling...

It was just that...Axel probably needed someone just as much as Roxas. Regardless of whom he was, Axel was a human. He might've been a coward with a lust for dominance, but above all he was a human with emotions. In reality, that lust came naturally. But because he'd been made to believe that greed is a curse, maybe Axel just didn't feel so normal anymore...and maybe the reason why he kept so close to Roxas was because—

Because he was the only one who could understand.

Roxas shook his head, earning a light head afterward, and froze in place just before his feet touched an incoming wave. The tide had already washed in, shrinking the size of the already tiny island. So now Roxas felt cramped. A flightless bird stuck in a cage, possibly. Was this punishment? Was this what he deserved...for betraying?

He hung his head and listened to the waves, trying to concentrate hard to hear if there was any message hidden within the sound. He'd learned a long time ago that countries weren't so far apart as they seem and that one day people could always see and hear each other. They were all connected. Now there were vast oceans that disconnected chains and kept one person from another. Roxas carefully placed a closed hand over his chest and knew...that he was victim to this disconnection. Somewhere, Sora was...still alive. And here Roxas was, a million miles away. Who to blame for that...?

He wanted to cry about now...but as the cold wind whipped at his cheeks, he looked up and his eyes diverted to the right, distracted by a dark silhouette sitting motionless against the rising moon. He couldn't cry now. Immediately, his eyes widened and he turned his body toward the shadow sitting atop a boulder which was completely surrounded by the high tide. The wind rushed past the two of them, filling in the silence and, strangely, easing the tension in the air.

"...Axel," Roxas whispered, taking a step forward. The shadow didn't budge.

Yeah, that was Axel alright. After all, they were the only two on this island right now, so Roxas really couldn't have a doubt. Still, given the circumstances, it was difficult to trust who was who and what was what, so Roxas took caution as he took another step closer to the shadow. He could feel shivers travel all along his body as his ankles sunk below the waves. The silence the two of them were in was so perfect...and for once he felt a strange wave of comfort. For a second, he felt like shutting his eyes, possibly drift off to sleep if he could, but he was too consumed in his feeling to fall asleep on it.

At last, Axel's shadow seemed to move and Roxas instantly locked his eyes on him with deep interest. He waited...until finally the silence broke, a sudden happening that caused Roxas's breathing to hitch.

"...I found a way off the island." Axel looked over his shoulder a bit as he said it and the rest of his body remained frozen atop the boulder. Roxas noticed that his right leg was pulled up to his chest while the other was dangling over the edge, barely touching the waves underneath.

He didn't respond and merely furrowed his eyebrows slightly, confused at what Axel had brought up. He held both of his elbows to his chest in an almost insecure way. Honestly, he sort of was insecure at the moment.

A tiny smile curved on the captain's thin lips when Roxas remained silent and as he peered up at the rising moon he chuckled and tried to envision the look on the boy's face. Hah. What a pretty little thing he was. No doubt that under this moonlight he would be even prettier. There were many reasons to like Roxas, not just for looks, but for what was inside him. However, what truly captivated Axel...remained a secret.

He sighed and spoke again. "It'll take work, hard work, mind you, and a lot of time, but it's the only way, you see." Axel had said it so quietly and seriously that Roxas had a hard time believing that the words were coming from the right person. He swallowed hard and for a second felt his insides turn as guilt struck his entire body, giving him a pain even greater than the gash underneath his bandages. What a stupid feeling...

When Roxas kept quiet, Axel looked out over the dark horizon with vacant eyes. "And considering that we're both injured, the process might take longer."

"What process?" Roxas suddenly blurted out, still holding his arms close to his chest. It was freezing out here because of the waves and retaining his stubborn voice was difficult with the wind wrapping around his body. The blonde watched as Axel slowly, very slowly, twisted his body and soon revealed his face to him, illuminated from behind by the moon. Normally, Roxas would've found the sight to be romantic, but right now he just wasn't so sure what he really should think.

At last Axel answered the boy's question with a steady, almost eerie voice, saving the poor thing the suspense. Before he did, he lowered his leg from the boulder so that his feet were dangling freely over the tide and glanced over his shoulder to lock his eyes the best he could with Roxas. And then...he felt a strange beating in his chest upon looking at him, standing in the light like that. Seeing Roxas so quiet and serene did make Axel jealous, jealous because he hadn't felt contentment like Roxas could in a while, but at the same time he felt...somewhat at peace.

So he smiled.

"...I've been on this island before, you know," he said to which Roxas's head tilted curiously. "Took me a while to remember, but I eventually figured out that I came to this island a long time ago...to kill one of my captain's crew members." Axel paused and suddenly he looked away from the blonde as if he were ashamed to say that. After a moment he shook his head and continued. "So, I know that land isn't too far from here. We'll have to build a raft and head in that direction soon as we're done, so we can't afford to let some cuts and bruises get in the way of our work, savvy?"

Roxas's eyes widened and at once he nodded up at him. "Yeah. Yeah I do..."

Hearing that...made Axel's chest hurt, but in a good way, strangely enough. He scoffed, shutting his eyes as he did and brought a shaking hand to the top of his head where he began to run his fingers through his hair. Quite honestly, he was overwhelmed with...emotions, ones that had been stolen from him so many years ago, and quite honestly, he wasn't sure how to express them correctly.

"So determined, aren't you?" he asked, not really expecting an answer.

...But Roxas gave him one anyway.

"I have to be. For myself...and for you."

The captain looked up at that and lowered his hand from his head in shock. What was that? What'd he just hear? Yes, he'd heard his crew say things like that before, literally bowing and kissing his feet as they did, but from Roxas the words sounded true and compassionate. The boy didn't even get down on his knees and make himself smaller than the captain; he simply made them equal.

That...he'd wanted. To be level with someone. Without pension, without worship and flashy words...

He'd wanted that.

It had happened so quickly that Roxas barely had the time to blink, let alone catch his breath. Within the minute he'd said those few simple words, he'd heard a splash, his name, and soon Axel's shadow came jolting at him like lightning, eventually colliding with his body at what he expected to be the same force. But it didn't hurt...it didn't hurt. No. He felt familiar warmth spreading across his face, down his chest and through his veins. It traveled through his body and loosened his muscles, causing them to relax and his body to melt in place. By then he could barely stand, but he welcomed this strange sensation...took it in without regret and without fear.

Axel's arms were coiled protectively around Roxas's body—a hand was holding the back of Roxas's head and pulling it close to his chest while the other hand stayed at his back. Under no circumstances would he lose sight of this boy...this pretty little thing, this—this pirate. He'd wanted Roxas ever since he'd seen him, and even though he'd broken the rules, Axel still had hope. No...regardless of what the blonde had done, he'd still be able to save the captain. This new sensation in his body proved that.

With his eyes shut and lips beside Roxas's ear, Axel nudged the boy's head and tried to understand what it was like...to accept someone else other than himself. He found himself asking if hugging was the proper thing to do, if maybe he was too quick to jump ahead to this position. Was that selfish of him? Technically, he was using Roxas for his own benefit, but somehow...Axel thought that this need for Roxas was normal, not a cursed desire. Gently he brushed the tips of his fingers over the exposed skin on Roxas's back, earning sharp and sudden goosebumps in response. He did it again, tracing the faint curve of the spine before stopping as his fingers met with the makeshift bandages wrapped around Roxas's torso. He smirked and carefully turned his head just enough so that his lips tapped the blonde's ear.

"I should thank you..." he whispered casually.

Roxas shut his own eyes and kept his body perfectly still within Axel's hold. His arms remained at his side. His feet were firmly planted in the sand. "For what?" he asked. "Being a smart aleck? A jackass?" After he'd said it, Roxas felt Axel's hold tighten and he held his breath when it did. Should he believe that Axel was hugging him because he truly wanted to? What a mess.

"No," he replied with a scoff. "No, you, Roxas...understand this little predicament I'm in, something I think Xigbar and the others are jealous of. And I think he's aware that the type of greed you hold inside is much less malicious than theirs. See, when each of them failed to constrain themselves, they shared the curse with me, meaning that they couldn't feel; they couldn't comprehend with others...And here you are. Hm. You see past the curse, don't you? To you, we're all normal people. To you, being greedy can be a good thing."

Roxas searched the air for an answer.

"Your...darkness isn't only for you. You don't want things because you're selfish. You bend the rules, do a little wrong...for the sake of other people, am I right?"

Was he right?

"Take for example your brother. All you lust for is to go back home...and see him again. A different kind of greediness is inside you...How strange."

"...Do you like that?"

Axel opened his eyes after the question and stared at Roxas's neck. "Hm?"

Sighing, the boy turned his head and tried to stand up on tiptoes so that he could speak clearer into the captain's ear. Perhaps that was a stupid move, but he'd done it anyway. "Is that what makes me special to you?"

"Ah, I remember this question."

"You should," Roxas said smugly, smiling with parted lips against Axel's skin. "You never answered me the first time I asked."

"Mm...Well, there you are. I believe all that answered your question rather well."

"And now I ask another question. I'll need one answer from you again, sir."

Something close to a purr vibrated in Axel's throat and transferred onto Roxas's bare shoulder, causing his eyes to dilate and flutter a couple of times in surprise. Soon he could feel cold teeth below his left ear and he gasped when a tongue followed to taste his skin. He wondered if Axel really enjoyed tasting salt water and blood. So, was this the answer Roxas was supposed to get? If so, he supposed he should take it as a yes.

His eyes were half shut when he carefully brought a hand behind Axel's head and pulled it closer to his neck as if to beg for more contact. Immediately Axel obliged and dragged his tongue below Roxas's jaw line at an extremely slow pace. By the time he'd started to bite Roxas's earlobe, the blonde once again brought his lips to Axel's ear and whispered in a vulnerable voice.

"Axel..."

"Mhm?"

"...I think you'd like to get the hell off this island as much as I do, so there's really no time for this, is there?"

The redhead chuckled at that and once he'd loosened his grip Roxas quickly slipped out under his arms and took off walking down the beach and into the darkness. Axel turned to watch him saunter away and eyed his body language—the way his hips swayed, the way his arms swung in the air. Roxas had even pushed at Axel's chest before he'd walked off. Oh, did they really have to leave the island so soon?

They were just starting to have fun.

AXEL. NO. BAD AXEL. NO ROXAS GROPING TONIGHT. BAD.

...psh, yeah right. XD ok, guys, that chapter took COUNTLESS jetlagged nights to type up. this is getting to the point where i'm just so...disappointed in myself. DX uhm...i really should've been working on honors english crap over this vacation, but instead i spent my time buying candy, trinkets, panties (HOORAY?) and CDs for the trip back home...and writing fanfiction. have i also mentioned watching, like, a BAJILLION movies on HBO? so...i think my teacher's gonna have a cow when i go back to school with a crappy essay. PHAIL.

OMG OMG OMG, who here has seen all the WONDEROUS kingdom hearts news lately??? OMG YAY. YAYNESS. YAYNESS TO THE MILLIONTH POWER. i'm so...FANGIRLY. i think my inner fangirl will es'plode once 358 over 2 days is released in a couple of months. i was really praying for next month, but FUCKING SQUARE ENIX IS TOO BIPOLAR. ugh. anyway.

let's see...yeah, i had a kahlua yesterday! it tasted pretty much awesome. i'm trying to taste some alcohol before i head back home...where the age limit ACTUALLY matters, ya know...on that note, perhaps i should try something ELSE while i'm here...-shifty eyes-

naw. XD

lastly, i'm going to japan for a short stop over tomorrow, and i'm gonna end up buying magazines for sure. i just have to dig through all the pron magazines before i find a decent one to bring back home. AH. speaking of porn, i need to draw some AKUROKU PR0N. OH GOD. what if the security guard opened my bag and saw that drawing, though?? ...i think i should save drawing that until after i get back home. oh, darn...

now. kindly keep your hands to yourself, axel. you do have to pay attention to other things, tsk.

do you like that...?,
kokoro77