Chapter Five

"I'm in big trouble," I told Jake during lunch.

"What's wrong?"

"Chapman," I said. "He caught me flirting with Melissa, and now he wants me to meet with him after school!"

Jake gave me a confused look. "Marco, why were you flirting with the vice-principal's daughter?"

"I wanted to get back at Rachel for saying I'm no good with girls," I said.

"But Chapman caught you."

"And now he wants to talk with me after school! He'll probably put me in detention for a year for putting the moves on his daughter!"

"Never date someone whose dad can give you detention," Jake said. "I read that in a fortune cookie once."

"Ha ha," I said. "If Chapman doesn't kill me, Rachel will."

"Well, it sounds to me that, despite your hissy fit, you're not good with girls after all."

Ouch.

"Okay, I deserved that," I said. "Sorry for running out on you guys yesterday."

Fortunately, Jake's a cool dude and doesn't hold stuff like that against you. "Don't worry about," he said. "So...Melissa Chapman."

"Yeah. Melissa."

"You could pick a worse girl to flirt with, I guess."

"You think she's cute, then?"

"Her dad wouldn't hesitate to kill you, Marco."

"You do think she's cute, then," I said. "Well, sorry to disappoint you, Jake, old buddy, but I got to her first."

"Cassie probably wouldn't like it if I asked Melissa out anyway," Jake grinned.

"So how did the meeting go after I left?" I asked.

Jake checked to make sure no one was listening to us. It'd be slightly stupid if we got found out as the Animorphs because we were overheard talking about missions during school.

"The thing is, the dating service hasn't actually started yet," Jake said. "According to Tom, it's still in the planning phase as one of the Sharing's 'Community Enhancement Projects'."

I nodded. That made sense. The Sharing likes to set up bogus charity causes every now and then. Although I'm not sure how "giving lonely guys something to do on the weekends" counts as a charity cause.

"That's good news, right? All we have to do is find some way to convince them to dump the project?"

Jake nodded. "That's probably going to be tougher than it sounds, though, so after school today, we're doing recon at the Sharing's Community Center. I figure Ax can work his computer magic."

I would have said something in response, but someone punched me in the back of my head. Hard.

"You are DEAD, Marco," Rachel hissed.

"Ouch," I said.

"I told you to stay away from Melissa Chapman," Rachel growled. "She's my friend, and I don't want to see you mess with her!"

I tried to weasel my way out of trouble. "What are you talking about? She had my phone! I had to see her to get it back!"

"You liar!"

"Rachel, calm down," Jake said. "Marco wasn't being serious. It was just his idea of a joke."

"A joke?!"

"He was messing with you, that's all," Jake said. "He's not serious about Melissa. Right, Marco?"

Jake gave me a Marco, agree with me right now because I'm saving your behind look.

"Um...right," I said. "Sorry, Rachel. I was just being stupid."

"Like usual," Jake added. Some best friend he is.

Rachel still looked like she wanted to rip my head off, but Jake had taken the wind out of her sails. "But—but—Marco!"

"What?"

"I saw you kiss her!" Rachel accused. "Was that part of your stupid joke?"

"You kissed her?" Jake asked. "You told me you only flirted with her!"

"I plead the fifth," I pleaded.

Rachel grabbed my shirt. "That's it. You're dead."

"No!" I said. "It was a joke, okay? Ha ha? Funny? Please don't kill me."

"I want you to promise me that you will never flirt with Melissa again," Rachel said. "Joke or no joke. Stay away from her."

"You win, Xena," I said. "I'll leave her alone."

"You'd better."

Just then, the mother of all stupid thoughts hit me. "You're getting so worked up about me kissing Melissa Chapman...you're not jealous, are you?"

Rachel immediately gritted her teeth and hit me in the eye. Then she stormed off.

"I probably deserved that," I said.

"No doubt," Jake agreed.