Hey! Just letting you guys know I'm procrastinating homework for you (thanx for the excuse!) but my test was postponed so you guys get a chapter!

Tis a dark one

Disclaimer time!

Disclaimer:

Blond Doctor: So, what brings you here?

Me: I want to know if I own twilight, and since you are Carlisle I thought you could help me.

Blond Doctor: Umm...My name is Jake, not Carlisle. But I am positive you don't own twilight.

Me: Jake? Like Bella's best friend who she was in love with who is a werewolf? Can you turn into a wolf?

Blond Doctor: No...(talking into intercom) Maggie, you better come up here...yes, bring this patient to room 220...yes, the one for the twilight addicts

ENJOY!

Life had been so good that I should have realized that it wouldn't last. I should have realized that my happiness would have to come to an end soon.

And yet, it still came as a surprise to me.

I was in the kitchen, preparing dinner, when I heard the knock on the door. I assumed that it was one of the many new friends I had made since Charles had left. With the intention of inviting them to stay for dinner, I opened the door.

I stepped back in shock when I saw who it was.

With the same smile and evil glint in his eyes as always, he whispered "I'm home Esme."

Charles.

I was frozen with fear. I couldn't move, speak or think for a good 30 seconds. I just stood there.

"Well, aren't you gonna say something?" He asked, his voice already poisoned with the impending, inevitable fury.

"Wel...Wel…Welcome home honey." I choked out. "Do you want dinner?"

"Yes, dinner would be good. It better be tastier than the crap they fed us when we fought. If not…" He smiled his wicked grin and held up his fist.

I wasn't sure if I should be relieved that my food would undoubtedly satisfy him, because of the fact that it was of a much higher caliber than the army food, or to be ashamed that he would doubt my cooking skills this much. I nervously served the food.

He scowled. "This looks disgusting. Are you trying to poison me?"

"No!" I yelped, shocked that he would entertain such thoughts.

"Don't lie to me you rotten hag!" Then he slapped me. The sting triggered the memories of all the pain I had felt before Charles had left. And I knew this was just the beginning.

And the night just got worse from there.

Life had reverted back to its usual state. I began waking up each morning with fresh bruises and scabs on my entire body again.

I had hoped the war had changed Charles. I had prayed that this was what our relationship had needed to be fixed. I chuckled cynically every time I thought about my hopes. I suppose Charles had changed.

He had become worse.

"Thank god Charles is at work." I muttered to myself as I wretched into the toilet for the third time this morning. I didn't want him to find out about this. He couldn't.

I doubted he would put two and two together, but then again, you never know. I did.

It had taken me a while to realize it myself. But it had all come together. The vomiting, the eating, the difficulty sleeping, I knew what it all meant.

I was expecting.

When I first found out, I was thrilled. I had always wanted a child. I was so happy that I did my work around the house gladly, and dealt with the beatings without a word of complaint.

And then came the fear. No, not just fear. Sheer terror. I could not, would not, allow my baby to be brought up in this household. Not with a father who would hit them and beat them day after day. I would not let the child endure this life. He or she deserved a better life than this.

I knew what had to be done. I had to leave. Get out of here. Hide with my child. I would have to pretend to be a war widow. It wouldn't be hard; I knew what it was like to have a husband go to war. I just had to pretend he hadn't come home. I had always wished he wouldn't come home, I just had to pretend to live that dream.

I knew I had to leave soon. I was just waiting to choose where to go, and for the opportunity to leave. It was out of the question to attempt to leave while he was at work. He would return home so soon that I would most likely not be at my destination, wherever I chose to go, by the time he realized I was not at home. I doubted I would even reach a destination by the time he realized I was not coming back.

I ran through the options of places to go in my head. I had a second cousin named Marie who lived in Milwaukee. I figured I could go there, at least while I looked for somewhere else to stay. I had never been extremely close with Marie, but we had been friends. Good enough friends that I could trust her not to tell anyone the true identity of who was staying with her. I hoped I wouldn't intrude on her life to much. She lived with her husband on a charming farm, and I would hate to barge in and ruin their serenity. But deep down, I knew there was another worry. Marie would never be able to have children. When our parents used to expect us to talk together before we were married and moved apart, we could never fully get to know each other, because Marie wouldn't open up to me. This was because she envied me. She saw my beauty and knew I would find a man who would love me and I could have children with. She never could. I wondered if my pregnancy would strain our relationship even more. Her jealousy would probably be forgotten if I told her about Charles. She had a loving husband, who was quite the gentleman. I didn't envy her exact husband, for he was not the man I would choose if I could have any man, but he loved her. He truly deeply loved her. I had given up hope long ago that Charles might have truly loved me once. Now I looked back and wondered how I ever could have entertained those thoughts.

Love was something I had only felt once, and even now, it felt more like a dream than reality.

But I held on to that one dream like day, refusing to let go. For if I let go, I knew I would fall.

Fall forever.