Tim clutched instinctively at Gibbs's lean, hard, warm body beneath him, relaxing as he felt the kiss on his hair. He allowed himself to settle back into his dreaming state assured of Gibbs's presence for one more morning.
Tim knew that the time would come when Gibbs would not be there and he would awake alone with just his dreams of him for company. But it seemed that dreadful day was not to be today.
He tried so hard to make himself into a man Gibbs would want to stay with. He had changed his clothes, his car, his hair, and his teeth. He knew he didn't have Gibbs beautiful steely blue eyes, firm jaw and lean muscular frame. But he had worked with what he could and he hoped it might be enough. He wasn't as attractive as he would have liked and he was still amazed every time he woke to find Gibbs in his bed.
He found himself often just staring at Gibbs in wonder, sometimes just watching him in his sleep. What did this amazing man see in him that could be worth the risks they ran?
Tim didn't think he would ever understand it so he just put it down to a freak aberration, like the true nature of a black hole or bumblebee flight. And hoped like these wonders it would continue.
He had tried to grow up, to be older somehow and to not embarrass and shame Gibbs. But sometimes he still caught a look of disapproval on Gibbs face. It burned him and he simply tried harder, actively shedding the naïve Timothy that had blundered into Gibbs's path trying to become the new confident unflappable Special Agent McGee.
He wanted to be what Gibbs needed. And the far too young 'Probie' McGee couldn't be what Gibbs needed. So he had systematically set about becoming more than he was in the hope that it would be enough to keep Gibbs at his side.
There were times though when Tim wanted to let it all slip away. When he grew tired of always thinking and expanding and changing and he longed to be simply Tim and Jethro. Perhaps one day he would simply stand up, look Gibbs in the eye and say enough is enough. This is who I am. This is all there is but you can have it all. Take me or leave me.
These defiant moments would come to him sometimes when the night was late and the bed was cold and Gibbs would not meet his eyes in the elevator after work.
But then the next night would come and Gibbs would be asleep back in his bed, curled on his side, his arm wrapped tightly around Tim's waist even in sleep. On these nights it only took the mere contemplation of Gibbs walking away to send chills through him and he would turn and rolling Gibbs over Tim would climb on top of him. He would wake him with sweet but insistent kisses that soon turned desperate with longing and desire. Even then on those rare fearful nights Gibbs knew what he needed like he always did. Tim would desperately hitch Gibbs's trim hips higher and there was nothing like the sound of Gibbs moaning Tim's name underneath him as they strained in exquisite pleasure, their bodies entangled together. He would reach for Gibbs's beautiful strong hands and clasp them tightly in his as they came together, shuddering through their orgasm sweating, panting and breathless.
Later after Tim had collapsed and slept exhausted on Gibbs chest, Gibbs would roll him over and make love to him long and soft and sweet, murmuring his name and begging forgiveness in his ear as he kissed away Tim's silent tears. And Tim knew he would never make that defiant stand. He would take whatever Gibbs could offer him and be content. Because Gibbs loved him and he loved Gibbs and that was all he needed to know.
Tim blinked the sleep from his eyes and looked up at Gibbs who held him in his strong arms. The morning light softly lit up the room and Tim thought Gibbs looked beautiful with his silver hair sticking up everywhere and his laughing blue eyes and wondered again how this amazing handsome man could consent to share his bed.
He leaned in and kissed him softly before offering him breakfast.
Gibbs gave him one of his patented looks and Tim laughed.
"Ok how about we start with coffee?"
Tim didn't bother to dress and slipping out of their bed headed into the kitchen naked, a soft smile playing on his face as he remembered the previous night. Gibbs loved him. Whatever happened in the future he knew that right now Gibbs loved him. Perhaps he didn't have to try so hard for his approval? Perhaps he could begin to relax a little?
Tim opened the cupboard and stopped, considering for an instant before he called out to his lover in the bedroom.
"I know you're going to laugh but I feel like some dinosaur cereal this morning. Haven't had any in ages"
Tim pulled out the air tight container of cereal that had been shoved in the back of his cupboard and began carefully preparing Gibbs coffee just the way he liked. Fresh, sweet and strong.
Maybe, just maybe he might be enough for Gibbs after all?