Disgaea: A New Overlord
Before I proceed with the third chapter of Disgaea: A New Overlord Director's Cut edition, I want to share with my readers some news that I have found particularly exciting. Just today (considering I started writing this on Christmas Eve of 2006) I got a copy of Disgaea 2 as a gift. (And yes, I know the game has been out for a while. I've been broke and unable to afford it; shoot me.) Since playing this game, I have been filled with a renewed creative buzz for writing this series that's even more powerful than what I had starting out. So please look forward to future chapters, which will most likely feature cameos from Disgaea 2 characters, as well as other Nippon Ichi works. I hope you'll all be satisfied. Now then, on with the third chapter!
Chapter 3: A Series of Misfortunate Misunderstandings
Etna dashed into Laharl's chambers, finding Laharl playing a game on his newly acquired PS2. She couldn't believe that the longest reigning overlord so far could be as oblivious as to what was going on around him. She walked around to the side of the TV and pulled the extension cord for the PS2 out of the socket.
"What are you doing?! I didn't even get a chance to save my game!" Laharl shouted as he threw the controller to the floor. "You'd better have something really important to tell me."
"Prince, we've got big trouble on our hands. You know that prinny that was supposed to get the Mana Level Indicator back? Well, he was spotted and ended up getting photographs of him taken. You know what this means, don't you?" Etna explained.
"Not exactly. I'm not following." Laharl responded in all seriousness. It was no big surprise that, in some instances, Laharl was a bit slow on the uptake.
"It means we may have a real tourist emergency on our hands, you moron! People know that prinnies exist now!" Etna fired back with an exasperated shout.
Author's Note: There was an ending in Disgaea in which Laharl had assaulted, and then conquered, the earth. This means that naturally, people would know of the existence of Prinnies. This story is written as though that ending never took place.
"What's the big deal? Humans don't know how to enter the Netherworld anyway. The only ones to make it here were Gordon and his crew. And you know how that turned out for them." Laharl responded in an uncaring voice.
"But what if they manage to find a way? Do you know how much it would suck to have tourists milling about? Touching things and snapping photos? It'd be terrible, especially if they get me from a bad side."
"Seriously, you should just relax. The only way in here is by Dimensional Gate and I highly doubt that humans have their own Dimensional Gatekeepers to open one for them. We'll be fine."
"Prince, are you feeling okay? It's not like you to be this…laid back. Why are you taking this so calmly?" Etna now appeared genuinely concerned.
"The prinnies are always making stupid mistakes. I'll just kill the idiot and be done with it. It's nothing to get worked up over."
"I don't think killing off your own vassals is the smartest thing in the world…" Etna retorted, clearly displeased with Laharl's actions. "How you managed to last this long is beyond me."
"Seriously Etna, what's the big deal? So some prinny got its picture taken…" Laharl, who had just come to terms with how serious his situation was, stopped in mid-sentence. His eyes had flared with a rage that was new, and yet somehow all too familiar at the same time. It was even beginning to scare Etna, who was used to his temper tantrums by this point.
"Prince…are you okay? It kinda looks like something snapped in that head of yours…" Etna commented apprehensively.
"Where is that stupid prinny?! I'll give him such a beating; it'll knock the color off his feathers! I'll beat him to an inch of his life and pass it by a mile!" Laharl screamed. His voice echoed off the castle walls, shaking it to its very foundation.
"Prince, you should really try to calm down. You don't wanna have to rebuild the castle, do you?" Etna explained calmly. She was trying to maintain her composure, as she had never seen Laharl this angry before. Quite frankly, it was scaring her.
During this time, Flonne had just shown up in the main hall to visit her "good friends" Etna and Laharl when she had heard the commotion. She briefly contemplated turning around and leaving as though she were never there but decided to continue on anyway. She pushed past the throne room doors and continued down the long hallway towards Laharl's bedroom. She placed a hand against the door and opened it ever so slightly with the utmost caution.
"H-Hello? Laharl? Etna? Are you in here?" Flonne inquired timidly.
Etna turned her head to look at the doorway and spotted Flonne peeking in from the partially open door. She attempted to discreetly mouth the words "Now's not a good time" to Flonne. Though her attempt was apparently not good enough, as Laharl had taken notice of this.
"Who's behind the door?! Is it that prinny?! Oh, I'm gonna turn him into a pillow and have fun doing it!" Laharl shot towards the door with a surprising and considerably impressive amount of speed.
Etna, in one of those rare moments when she showed kindness, tried to stop Laharl from hurting Flonne by extending her leg into Laharl's path, effectively tripping him. Laharl fell into an uncontrolled rolled and shot through the door with a loud crash. Etna opened the door and looked across the throne room hall, spotting Laharl and Flonne at the far end, post collision. She couldn't tell if either of the two of them were hurt so she took a casual pace in approaching them, assuming they would both be fine considering the fact that they had been through worse than this. What Etna could not see however was the position Laharl and Flonne had ended in. For you see, Laharl's hands were essentially groping Flonne's chest, which had grown slightly since their last encounter. When Flonne came to, she noticed this. As anyone could have guessed, her response wasn't very pleasant.
"HELP! Laharl's trying to rape me!" Flonne cried out.
Flonne's shouts of desperation had jarred Laharl out of his dizzy spell and made him lucid enough to her what exactly it was that she was shouting. He was so caught up in trying to explain to her what had transpired that he had completely neglected to move his hands, which is exactly what the main cause of the problem was. Flonne pounded Laharl furiously with her hands, not hearing anything he was trying to tell her. Etna picked up the pace and sped over to Flonne's side. She gave Laharl a swift kick, knocking him off of Flonne, whom Etna helped to her feet.
"Shame on you, Prince! I know you're a demon and all and I can understand that you're angry, but taking it out on a friend! Honestly, raping your friend…that's the lowest of the low!" Etna reprimanded, taking the time to console Flonne. She cradled her in her arms while Flonne continued to cry on her shoulder.
"I-I never thought h-he'd do something like this!" Flonne choked out through a long sob. She tried to hold back her tears in order to speak, which was proving a task in and of itself. "B-but…we're friends. A-and I'm a-an angel. And angels are t-taught to allow f-forgiveness."
"But I didn't…" Etna, who was displeased enough as is with Laharl's actions, cut him off in mid-sentence.
"Don't you think you've done enough already? Come on Flonne, you can lie down and rest in my room. At least you'll be safe there."
"Thank you, Etna." Flonne followed after Etna into her room. Soon, they were obscured from view, courtesy of the doors of Etna's room.
Laharl clambered to his feet and dusted himself off. It would be just his luck that Jennifer had happened to be walking by and heard the whole ordeal. She headed towards Laharl with that displeased big sister look on her face that she used to guilt Laharl. Laharl saw her out of the corner of his eye and braced himself for yet another scolding.
"So I guess you've come to yell at me too, huh?" Laharl questioned, his back still turned to Jennifer.
"I won't yell at you, but I have to tell you Harlie, I'm very disappointed in you. I understand: you're young and your body is experiencing desires that you just don't understand. However, you have to understand how to go about dealing with these desires." Jennifer explained in a calm, quiet tone. "Laharl, I think it's time we had…the talk."
"What are you talking about? I'm 1316 years old. I'm way older than you are. What could you possibly have to tell me that I don't already know? Besides, I didn't mean to do it. Nobody's giving me a chance to explain. I'm the freakin' overlord for crying out loud!" Laharl snapped. Finally, realizing that the cycle wouldn't end if he kept fighting it, Laharl gave in. "Alright. Fine. You win. I'll listen. What is it you wanna tell me?"
"Well Harlie, when a boy reaches a certain age…" Jennifer continued with the talk.
"WHAT?!" Laharl's voice echoed throughout the entire kingdom.
Meanwhile, back in the human world…
The bell rang loudly, signaling the end of Chiaki's school day. She shot out of the door of her final class and into the fourth floor stairwell. She headed down the stairs rapidly, jumping down the remaining steps at each landing. Standing near the entrance to the school was Miroku, waiting for Chiaki as he had promised her earlier. She approached him eagerly holding her camera, a wide grin adorning her face. Miroku turned around and noticed Chiaki coming toward him.
"So, you ready to go and get your money back?" Miroku questioned.
"Yeah, but first I have something important to show you."
"Important?" Miroku echoed.
"Yeah. I finally have proof that prinnies exist!" Chiaki declared triumphantly, her grin widening.
"Prinnies? What are those? Oh! You're talking about those purple penguins again. What did you find this time? A talon or something?" Miroku teased.
"Shows how much you know. Prinnies don't have talons. They have peg legs. But no, that's not what I wanted to show you. I wanted to show you these." Chiaki held the screen up to Miroku's face and scrolled through all the pictures she had taken. Miroku's eyes widened in disbelief; he just couldn't believe that Chiaki actually had photos of a prinny that she had taken herself.
"Now do you believe prinnies exist?" Chiaki asked forcefully.
Miroku, being stuck in his ways when it came to this sort of thing, looked at Chiaki and then just gave a slight grunt and a shoulder shrug.
"It doesn't really prove anything. For all I know, you could have just photographed a doll or something. I could swear I've seen one before at the local toy store." Miroku answered with an air of coolness.
"Even after I got all these pictures and stuff, you still don't believe me?!" Chiaki yelled. She didn't care for the fact that Miroku thought she was just an obsessed fan girl.
All the pent up stress and anger made Chiaki reach her breaking point and she began to cry. Not quietly but in loud, wailing sobs. Miroku's face turned a bright shade of red as people began to stare at him with disapproving looks.
"What are you doing, you idiot?! Stop crying! You're drawing attention to yourself…and me!" Miroku sputtered.
"Oh, and I'm an idiot now too, am I?! I hate you!"
Chiaki's shouts now made everyone in the vicinity focus heavily on Miroku, much to his dismay. Miroku looked around nervously, taking note of just how many people were around, and that the majority of them were now staring at him and Chiaki.
"No, I didn't mean it like that! She's not serious! Honest, I didn't call her an idiot." Miroku said to no one in particular.
"Look at that, made her cry." One person whispered.
"He must have a problem with women." Another lady murmured.
"He should be in military school." An old man remarked with a gruff voice.
"What an abusive boyfriend. Poor girl. I wonder how long she's had to put up with it." One girl said to her friend.
Miroku looked around quickly and made a survey of his surroundings. And with Chiaki continuing to cry, he couldn't honestly say it didn't look bad. He figured there was only one way to quiet her long enough for him to diffuse the situation. He'd seen it done in a lot of anime and TV shows but he couldn't believe that as of right now, it was his only option. There didn't seem to be any way to quiet her with words. He would have to put her into a state of shock and then drag her out of there post-haste. Miroku swallowed his pride, steeled his nerves, and kissed Chiaki. He pulled away quickly and examined her for a moment hoping that his idea, though clichéd, would work all the same. Chiaki ceased her tears for a moment and stared at Miroku, obviously in the shock Miroku was trying to evoke. Somehow though, to him, it seemed way too easy. And sure enough, he was right.
"What are you doing?!" Chiaki wailed. In response, she slammed her bag into Miroku's said, knocking him to the ground.
"But I…wait a minute, Chiaki! Let me explain!" Miroku yelled. His pleas fell on deaf ears as Chiaki ran full pace down the block and out of sight.
Miroku had never done this much damage and now he wasn't sure he could fix it. But at the moment, that was the least of his problems. Miroku turned his head to the sight of hundreds of angry, glaring eyes.
"You're scum!" One man shouted.
"The death penalty is too good for you!" A high school girl snapped.
"You should be put away for life!" The same old man from before bellowed.
Miroku figured that, from here, things could get much worse. Everyone witnessed what had just happened and couldn't hate him anymore than they did right now. He climbed to his feet and dusted himself off. Upon looking up, he realized that he was wrong. Things could get worse, and the worst was yet to come. The one person he had hoped was never around was now standing right in front of him. Kaname stood there with nothing but pure hatred and malice in her eyes. She was brandishing a kendo stick that she had borrowed from the kendo club.
"Now wait a minute, Kaname. It's not what you think. If you give me a chance to explain, I'm sure…" Miroku didn't get a chance to finish. Kaname took a step towards him and swatted the kendo stick against her hand.
"You hurt Ms. Hyafumi. You defiled her. You destroyed her innocence. You forced yourself on her. And now you have to deal with me. Tell me, Megami, have you ever heard the old saying "You summoned the thunder, now get ready for the lightning?" Well Megami, you're in for one hell of a storm." Kaname said with murderous intent dripping off her words like the venom of a cobra's fangs.
Miroku swallowed hard. He wasn't necessarily afraid of Kaname per se. However, by this point, it would be completely understandable if he was. Miroku had an 8th degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do and a 10th degree black belt in Jujitsu as well as experience in his own self taught fighting style. The only thing that was holding him back was that Miroku took a vow never to strike a woman. Which meant that he was at a total disadvantage here. Not only did he have to deal with the possessed officer Kaname, but he also had the angry mob behind him, and he knew that they weren't going to allow him to leave that easily. His only chance would be to somehow force his way past Kaname and run down the same path Chiaki took.
"Never in all my life have I been so infuriated! You should be thrown into a dark put with no hope to ever see the light of day again!" Kaname shouted as she swung the kendo stick down with the immense force of everything she had in her.
"Oh crap! Strike Stopper!" Miroku responded in panic. He clasped his hands together just as the kendo stick came near his face. He stopped it with complete efficiency. The crowd, although still quite angry with Miroku, couldn't help but marvel at his skill.
Miroku, seeing this as an opportunity, turned his arms to the side, jerking Kaname out of the way since the kendo stick was still caught between his hands. He leapfrogged over her and charged down the block, desperately trying to catch up with Chiaki. The only reason he even tried as because he knew he had a slight chance. Chiaki was a pretty fast runner, but she was the slowest member of the girl's track team. Miroku, being somewhat active in physical activity in his own right, knew that he could at least keep up with the girl's team captain in a footrace on a good day. This was his faint glimmer of hope at catching up to Chiaki.
Well then, that's the end of the third chapter in the Director's Cut series of Disgaea: A New Overlord. As I said in the beginning, I recently got a copy of Disgaea 2 as a gift so it's given me a new fuel to write this fan fiction. For future chapters, I may institute cameos by characters from Disgaea 2 as well as other Nippon Ichi games, so I hope you're all looking forward to that. Comments, constructive criticism, and reviews are always welcome and appreciated. Anything else that can't be addressed in a review, as always, can be sent to me in an email and I will respond ASAP.