Sorry for not posting for so long! I've had a pretty hectic week and was gone all weekend! Oh well, hope you enjoy!
How to be HumanLesson Twelve: How to Get Together With Friends
Turk's View: River
I couldn't believe this was happening. First, I find myself being dragged into a store where some of the clothes cost just as much as my first gun did. Then I find myself being forced to try on a way too revealing dress. (Hey, I may be a Turk, but after my old job, I've set up some limits, okay?) To make things worse, I take off that stupid dress only to be bombarded with a ton of other crap I'd never wear even if they paid me.
What's wrong with my Turk uniform, anyway?
Oh, and of course my stupid boss Lilith goes and buys that stupid revealing dress and the other stupid clothes that stupid Rachel and stupid Lin and stupid Kyra picked out because the stupid twins told them too. And now I'm being dragged back to Zel's stupid apartment to be forced through a stupid "fashion show" because my stupid boss said so and if I don't she'll probably fire (or shoot) me…
Can't you tell how excited I am to be doing this?
"Cheer up, Ri," Kyra said, patting my head. "You'll get to show your assets to Zel. It'll be a sure-fire 'love at first sight' moment as soon as he notices what he's missing!"
"Oh, that's exactly what I want," I whispered venomously back to her. "Another guy after me only because I have breasts."
"Yeah, but we all know Zel's not like that," Lin said, grinning. "He just needs a little help, ya know?"
"And that would be me, Lin, Kyra, and Riley," Rachel said, smiling too. I glared at them.
"You drug Riley into this?" I hissed.
"Yup, they drug me into this!" Riley stated, coming literally out of nowhere. I jumped slightly and glared at her too.
"I thought we were allies," I stated.
"We were, and I'm doing what's best for the alliance," Riley said, crossing her arms and sticking her tongue out at me.
"How is my complete humiliation 'doing what's best?'"
"It's not gonna be like that, River! Don't worry!" Lin assured me. I seriously was on the brink of killing all four of them.
Really.
But we made it to Zel's place before that ever happened (darn it). Luckily Zel had his key this time (shocker) and was able to let us in before someone shot the doorknob off (again).
That's when I noticed people were missing. Basically, David, Legion, and Kilick were still MIA. (I knew they couldn't handle shopping.)
"Did we leave David, Legion, and Kilick at the mall or something?" I asked.
"Nope, those bastards skipped out on us. They die on Monday," Lilith said, smiling at me innocently. Don't ask me how she managed that (my boss scares me).
Suddenly a book went flying through the air
-THUMP-
"ZEL! What was that for?" Lilith screamed. She was holding her head, glaring at Zel.
"NO CUSSING WHILE CHILDREN ARE PRESENT!" Zel shouted back at her. I looked over at him, smiling when I saw he was covering Cinder's ears and glaring angrily at Lilith.
"What? Vincent's heard all this," Lilith complained. Vincent (who was innocently putting things away in the kitchen) didn't seem to hear her comment. Everyone else found it funny.
'Cept me…I value my life.
Turk's View: Zel
I swear to the Gaia, if I live through this night, I will never try to commit suicide again….
Okay….maybe not never….
Shera's (Cinder's) View
Master Zel looks nervous… I noticed that as the girls drug me and Miss River into the Zel's (or is it my?) bedroom. Mr. Rito and Mr. Tori made him sit on the couch and wouldn't let him get up. He kept fidgeting too…
It's official; Master Zel is not a people person and especially not a girl person.
"Miss River?" I asked, looking up at the older woman. "Why is Master Zel so uncomfortable around girls?" River sighed.
"He's not gay, just so you know. He's just…insecure, I guess…" she replied, shaking her head.
"After what Lucy did to him, I doubt he'll ever let a girl get close to him again," Rachel explained.
"Lucy is Zel's ex-girl-fiend…er, girlfriend…" Lin stated.
"Let's stop talking about Lucyfer. I don't want to hear about her again unless she's on the hit list," Riley moaned.
"Agreed," all the girls said. I was confused, but I said agreed too. I didn't want anyone hurting Master Zel…ever.
Miss Lilith walked in right then, looking at me and River.
"Alright River, it's time for you to step out of the box you've put yourself in!" she said, crossing her arms. "And Cinderella, we're going to make sure all these clothes we got you actually fit…I don't think Rachel is too good with sizes. She always picks things that are too big."
"That's why you like Legion!" Kyra yelled, causing all the girls but Rachel and me to burst out laughing. Rachel turned bright red, though I don't know if she was angry or embarrassed.
"How would you know?!" she spat back at Kyra.
Kyra just smiled evilly, "He lost a bet. David told me all about it." Rachel's mouth dropped open, River turned red, Riley just laughed harder, and Lin and Lilith exchanged shocked glances.
What are they talking about? What does 'sizes' have to do with Mr. Legion?
These people are strange.
"OKAY! Getting back to something appropriate!" River said, gesturing to me. The other girls quickly apologized (maybe it's good I didn't understand). Rachel politely excused herself, saying she had to make a phone call, and Lilith walked out after her, saying something about helping Vincent cook.
"Alright then, let's get this party started!" Riley said, smiling as she dug through the bags. Lin and Kyra also dug through some of the bags, pulling out random articles of clothing and setting them on the floor.
"Okay, Cinder, you're first," Lin said, smiling at me. "Let's see…why don't you try this?" She held up a blue tank top and a pair of blue jeans. I shrugged and she handed them to me, along with some new undergarments. I smiled and waited, not knowing if I should wait for them to leave or get changed now.
"Hey River, this is so what you're trying on!" Riley said, smiling, holding up a dress that River looked mortified to see.
"No! I will not! Absolutely not!" River shouted, face flushing. Lin smiled as Kyra started to chant.
"Chicken! River is a Chicken!" she said.
"I am not! I look horrible in blue!"
"But that's Zel's favorite color," Riley said, sly smile on her lips.
River took dress without further complaint.
Turk's View: Zel
"This isn't funny, guys! Let me go!" I stated. They didn't listen, of course. "Look, I just want to cook…VINCENT, GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN NOW! ...Rito, please? If we don't stop him, he'll burn the house down! Do you really think he knows how to use a stove, Tori?"
Naturally, the Twins refused to let go of my arms, leaving me stuck on the couch, awaiting the unveiling of whatever evil scheme Lilith had thought up or the apartment catching on fire. Because I had this nagging feeling in my gut that Vincent is no better of a cook than Dad is.
"Stop whining," Rito started
"Baby Zel," Tori finished.
"Why is everyone against me?!" I asked, slumping against the couch. Fine, burn the house down, see if I care.
Vincent walked out of the kitchen, smiling-err, well, smirking- at us. "Luckily for you, Zel, I thought myself to cook. And anyway, stop worrying about everything. The worst that will happen is that you'll see River in a dress. Is that so bad?"
Vincent, I hate you. I hate you so much.
"I guess…"
"It is," laughed the Twins. I glared at them. That's it, everyone dies tonight.
Except Cinder, of course…and River, because she was dragged unwillingly into this.
"Guys! You've got to see this!" Lin ran out, smiling broadly. (Yes, I have started to say my prayers…) Kyra and Riley followed, snickering, and lastly Cinder. Vincent smiled at the little girl.
"You look nice," he stated, throwing a glance back at me. "Right Zel?" I finally shrugged off the Twins' grip and nodded.
"Yeah, you look really good, Cinder. Blue's a good color for you." For some reason, I think that made her happy. Her eyes lit up and she ran up to me, giving me a hug. I hugged her back. (I can't help it! It's like trying to resist hugging a stuffed animal or a puppy…)
"Awww, how cute," Lilith said, smiling. She looked back at my bedroom door, waiting. My stomach plummeted. I'd forgotten about River.
"River, get your ass out here!" Rachel ordered, before covering her mouth.
"Soap! Punishable by soap!" I stated, heading towards the kitchen.
"Look Zel, we all know you want to shower with Rachel, but do you think Legion would be too happy with hearing about that?" Kyra asked, hands on her hips.
Hello again Floor. How's the last few hours been? I met your cousin at the mall. Nice guy, really…
"That was low, Kyra," Vincent stated, obvious edge in his voice as I scrambled to get up from the floor.
"Sorry. I know he was talking about the age old 'wash your mouth out with soap' trick. But it was too perfect…I had to say something," the Turk justified.
"You need help," Riley declared.
"We all do, but that's beside the point. River! Don't make me drag you out here!" Kyra ordered. "I will break down the door!"
"Don't do that!" I yelled. Kyra just laughed.
"I'm coming, shut up!" River called from my room. (Awkward!)
"You're gonna want to sit down, Zel," Riley warned. Lilith looked slightly mortified and Vincent looked quiet amused.
I knew it! They bet something on me! Damn it Vincent, how could you do that to your own brother?
"Don't worry, Master Zel. River looks really pretty! Just like someone from my book," Cinder said, smiling at me. I smiled back at her, masking the fact that what she had just said WAS NOT HELPING!
"I don't look that good, Cinder," River muttered, standing now in everyone's view.
There was a goddess in the center of my living room…I'm just dreaming, right?
RIGHT?!
First of all, she was wearing my favorite color, just like Cinder was. (There's a conspiracy against me, I swear. I should have never told anyone that my favorite color was my eye color, damn it!)
Second of all, she was wearing a very sexy dress.
Third of all, it was River in the dress. River who I'd had this small crush on since I'd entered the Turks division at Shinra. River who doesn't find it weird that I'm semi-psychotic (because fully psychotic people don't know they're crazy) and choose to be my friend.
River, who still remembers me from back then, the only reminder of what I once was, and doesn't seem to care at all.
Gaia, what's happening to me? I normally don't care how people look (because you could be the most attractive person on the planet and still be the Spawn of Satan). So why was River's sudden change of clothing affecting me like this?
Like making me wish she wasn't wearing any clothing…
Ack! Mind outa the gutter, Zel! MIND OUTA THE GUTTER!
"Do I look that bad?" River asked, looking around the room and then at me. "Your silence is not encouraging."
"No! No, that's not it. I-it's just that you look…uh…" Drop dead gorgeous? Like a goddess? So incredibly sexy?
For Gaia's sake, I can keep my thoughts straight!
"Just admit it Zel! You think she's hot, and we all know it!" Lin said, grinning. River's face probably mirrored mine. She was blushing and I was sure I was too.
"I…eh, um…well…er, uh…"
"Out with it, Turk!" Lilith ordered.
"You look really nice River!" I shouted, before jumping behind the couch and waiting to die.
"Thanks Zel." I peaked up from behind the couch, looking at River inquisitively. She had this look on her face, like that comment I'd just made cured cancer or something.
She looked genuinely happy.
"Uh…you're welcome?" I said, smiling slightly and standing up.
"And so begins a perfect relationship!" Riley said. River's face fell back to the embarrassed look. And me?
I'm just going to stay on the floor now, okay?
Turk's View: River
The night drug on, with me having to model countless different outfits in front of my boss, my boss's boss, my fellow colleagues, and Cinder.
It was after the fourth time I came out in a dress that Zel could put a sentence together without stuttering. I found this amusing.
Now, changing back into my Turk uniform in the bathroom (Cinder had gone to bed…she sleeps in Zel's room, and he gets the couch…we need to get Zel a new bed…) I heard a knock on the door.
"Yes?" I asked. I was decent enough, with my pants and a camisole on, so I really didn't care if whoever it was came in.
"You looked nice today, Ri," Rito said, coming in. I had gotten over my initial surprise of hearing him speak in complete sentences years ago. It turns out that Rito and Tori are actually quiet independent, but they work the best together. They just end each other's sentences because it's a habit they developed as children, when they spent so much time together that they learned how to basically read each other's minds.
I'd always thought it would be awesome to have a twin.
"Thank Rito. Where's your other half?" I asked, putting on my socks.
"Half asleep on the couch. He kicked Zel off ten minutes ago."
"That's nice. Zel seems to have a thing for the floor anyway," I said, smiling as I began to button up my shirt.
"River, we told Zel." I stopped what I was doing and looked at him, slightly shocked. "Sorry. We thought he needed to know. My only question is why you never told him."
"Because…I didn't want him to come to me and say 'pay up'. You know, like make me be indebted to him...to let him control me…" I sighed.
"You know as well as I do, Zel's not like that."
"I know! I just…Drakra is. Zel might not be, but Drakra is. And that's the one who saved me that day, not Zel."
"River, Zel and Drakra are the same people," Rito said, sighing as well.
"No they're not. Zel's a lost soul who couldn't kill a fly and can't kill himself, is hopelessly romantic and I'm in love with him. Drakra is a psychotic murderer who kills because he's told to and cares about nothing more than himself. Zel and Drakra are not the same people," I defended. Not unlike the Turks…I thought. Killing because they say so…
"They only share the same body."
"So Zel has MPD!"
"Is that what you think it is?" Rito asked quietly. "Tori seems to think the same thing…"
"And you don't?" I asked, watching him closely.
"I think 'Drakra' might be a manifestation of Zel's anger, hate, and, of course, his insanity. You know, like when someone talks of having their 'demons' to deal with. I think that Zel created Drakra as someone to blame every time does something he hates," Rito explained.
It was times like these that I showed me that I tended to forget how smart Rito and Tori actually were.
"So you think it's all in his head?" I asked.
"Yes. Then again, MPD is also a psychological thing."
"I see," I wanted to let the subject drop.
"Hey, River?"
"Yes, Rito?"
"If Zel tries to kill himself and he has MPD, is that a hostage situation?" I couldn't help but laugh at that.
After I finally calmed down, I noticed that Rito and I weren't alone anymore.
"So, are you going to…?" Rito asked
"Ask him?" Tori finished. Of course, here was Rito's half-awake other half.
"Ask him what?" I glared at the Twins, who smiled at me.
"Ask him to love you…"
"Just like you do him."
"Guys, I doubt he's interested."
"Two years is…"
"Enough time to recover." I sighed. They were right…I just needed to get over myself and put my head on the chopping block once and awhile.
"Fine. FINE!" I said, pulling on my jacket and shoes. "I'm going, I'm going…" I stormed past them, sighing.
"Good luck, River!" they said to me. I shook my head and headed down the hall and into the living room.
Zel, Lilith, and Vincent were the only people who were still here. That's good, I won't be as embarrassed. I swallowed the lump in my throat and walked over to Zel.
"Zel, can I talk to you for a moment?"
Turk's View: Twins
"Hey Brother?"
"Yes Tori?"
"If things don't work out between River and Zel…do you think she'll date me?" Tori asked, hopefulness ringing out in his voice. Rito laughed.
"Don't get your hopes up, Brother. She's loved Zel for eleven years…it'll be hard to top that."
Tori nodded, looking slightly forlorn. "Oh well," he stated, "I was late."
"Come on, let's go watch the fireworks," Rito said. Tori's eyes lit up.
"Yes! Let's!"
A/N: The whole "MPD Hostage Situation" joke is actually an inside joke my friends and I made up for Vincent...:-) Thank you for reading! Please review!
By the way, if you can think of anything that you'd teach someone if you were housing a nine year old who was a former sex slave, please PM me. I'd love to hear some ideas. :-)
Oh, and the next chapter isn't going to be a happy one.