Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Stargate Atlantis or it's wonderful characters.

Spoilers: Through Reunion in Season 4

On the timeline: The Return, Part 2 – Season 3

4 – Settling Back In

Jennifer watched from the window of the Daedalus as Atlantis came into view. Home, the feeling swept over her as she watched the spires and towers sharpen and come into focus as they descended toward the city. The last time she'd experienced this feeling was when visiting her father and her childhood home in Wisconsin during her college years.

She continued to watch as the Daedalus descended towards the west pier, with the decrease in altitude she felt a rise in the restless giddiness she was experiencing. She couldn't wait to unpack and she definitely couldn't wait to see everyone and begin working shifts in the infirmary again.

She knew she'd make a more concerted effort to take in and enjoy everything about Atlantis and the Pegasus galaxy this go around. The time she'd spent away would make this new stint in the city different.

She had been gone nearly ten weeks, a very long ten weeks. After six weeks at the SGC they heard the Ancients had all been killed by a takeover of the city by the Replicators. About a week later they were informed that Sheppard's team had successfully eradicated the Replicators from the city and that Atlantis personnel could return there. The three week ride on the Daedalus could not extinguish her excitement of getting to go home.

The only thought that dampened her joy was Ronon. It wasn't even that she was afraid of seeing him. In the general course of her day she typically didn't see him. A couple times a week he'd wander into the infirmary either with an injury or with someone that had an injury. Dr. Beckett tended to most of the injuries of Sheppard's team, kind of like an unwritten rule. She'd assist if more then one of them was hurt or Dr. Beckett was involved in another case.

She wasn't worried about what Ronon thought either. She wasn't going to try to convince herself that he probably didn't even remember; she'd guess that it wasn't something he'd have forgotten. How many times do you get kissed out of the blue by someone you don't really know? And if that was an everyday occurrence for him she was sure the shrieking and running away would help her stand out.

Her biggest worry was that she'd find herself alone with Ronon. She just knew it'd be an agonizingly uncomfortable time and she wasn't looking forward to it. The bright side was that most likely it would occur in the infirmary, on her ground…

Jennifer was pulled from her thoughts when the back of her knee was bumped causing her leg to give. She caught herself and whirled around, already knowing who it was.

"What are you, in high school still?" Jennifer teased knowing that Laura only messed with her as a distraction.

"Are you going to get off this ship or am I going to have to throw your butt off?" Laura rebutted.

"I'm fine; I was just taking in the sight. I don't get to see the city from the air very often… well actually ever."

"I have to agree that it's a beautiful sight, but now that looking out the window just shows an ocean, I suggest we go find Teyla and the girls and make plans for tonight."

"I am amazed that each of you was successful in completing your dare." Teyla smiled at the girls gathered around. "I wish each of us could have witnessed these dares being completed. I would have loved to see the faces of the men that were kissed."

Teyla turned to Jennifer, "I especially would have loved to see Ronon's reaction to being kissed by you. To my knowledge you and Ronon were but mere acquaintances prior to this kiss."

"We are still but mere acquaintances," Jennifer laughed. "I think that we'd all like to know how it went with your dare," Jennifer emphasized the point with a lift of her eyebrows.

Teyla began to laugh, "Actually, I must admit that I failed the dare."

The girls stared at Teyla dumfounded. If anyone is able to follow command, be matter of fact, or follow through on a promise, it is Teyla.

"Did an opportunity not present itself?" Marie asked feeling bad for Teyla.

"It is not so much that I didn't intend to bring about the kiss…"

"John," Teyla called as she entered his room. She didn't find him there, but she had checked everywhere else she could think of since leaving the girl's poker night. She knew that with being in charge of the evacuation of the city, his time was very limited. If she wanted to catch him alone, tonight would most likely be the only time.

She went and sat upon his bed to await his return. It was quite late, the girls had spent an enormous amount of time visiting and laughing, giddy due to the thought of fulfilling their dares. Surely John would be along shortly.

She was truly sad to think that she was going to be losing these friends. But if she was truthful with herself, which she tried to always be, she was heartbroken to be losing John. She always thought that eventually, one day, maybe they would admit to the awareness they both shared. But she would have settled to just never lose him, to always be on his team and considered family.

She laid back and began thinking over their first meeting and then moved on to missions and moments in Atlantis. As she grew tired she decided to wait a few more minutes. She could always try to catch him first thing in the morning.

The next memory she had was of Sheppard waking her up.

"So if this doesn't remind me of my childhood. Was my bed 'just right'?" said a grinning Sheppard who was sitting at the foot of the bed, next to where she lay.

"Sir?"

"Goldilocks and the three bears? It was a story about this girl… never mind."

Teyla sat up next to John, trying to put herself right. "I am sorry that I fell asleep upon your bed, John."

"Don't be, I tend to fall asleep upon it as well."

Teyla knew that he was trying to put her at ease. If he knew what she was trying to work up the courage to do, he'd realize that no amount of humor was going to work.

"How are you doing, Teyla?" he asked gently

"I will be alright, John," she admitted with sadness in her voice.

"You know that you could always come with us. I know I've said it, but it's true," she could hear the hope in his voice. "We owe both you and Ronon; I know that we could find places for you at the SGC."

"Thank you, John, but my place is with my people." Teyla looked away, "Now that Atlantis is not available to us, we will need to find other ways to protect our galaxy and fight the Wraith."

She was pulled back from her thoughts when she felt Sheppard take her hand in his. "Teyla…have you ever thought what… I mean wondered what would, um…I guess I'm trying to say that I'll miss you…you know"

Teyla knew how hard that had been for John to utter and he deserved her honesty for even trying. "I have thought about an us, if there could or would ever be a place for an us." She looked down at their joined hands. "I just imagined that there would be a right time, maybe a better time to think on it."

She felt his free hand cup the side of her face, his thumb caressing her cheek. "I did, too," he whispered while avoiding her eyes.

She felt the air catch in her throat as his eyes slowly moved from where his thumb was caressing her cheek down to her lips. He must have noticed the catch in her breath because now his deep green eyes were gazing intently into hers.

"What the hell," she heard a moment before his lips began to descend towards hers. She knew this was not going to be the rough, possessive kiss he had taken when his body was affected by the retro-virus. This kiss was all about the desire and awareness that had been simmering just below the surface for far too long.

As his lips touched her she felt herself coming back to life. Teyla slid her own arms around his neck. At the touch of her fingers on the nape of his neck, he pulled her in closer, the kiss becoming deeper.

Teyla was torn between a feeling of joy and an overwhelming desire to cry. How had they ever not gotten to this point… why had they never gotten to this point? She slowly slid her hands from around his neck, down his chest, feeling his heart beat under her hand.

John broke the kiss, but rather then pulling away she felt him kissing along her jaw as he settled her against his chest. They both sat there quietly holding each other, he seemed as reluctant as she to disturb the moment in any way.

Teyla finally felt John reluctantly pull back. His eyes met hers and she saw the battle that must be raging between his heart and head. He kissed her one last time before releasing his hold on her.

He reached down and quickly untied his boots before walking across the room and picking up his running shoes.

"John, what are you doing?"

"I'm leaving while I can." She watched him put his first shoe on, not sure what to say. "I walk through that gate at 0800 tomorrow morning by command." She watched him tie his other shoe and stand up. "Now… well, now I know…." He looked at the ground for a minute before shuffling to the door and leaving her.

"Teyla, how sad," Jennifer sympathized while walking over to sit next to her friend. "But now that we're back what did he say? Have you talked?"

Teyla heard the hope in her friend's voice and she took a deep breath before answering. "We are actually back to denying the awareness we feel for each other." She smiled sadly at the faces of her friends, "If he had stayed…well, he would not have been at the SGC. He would not have known to mount a rescue. He would not have helped save the City, Mr. Woolsey or General O'Neill. We would not be here in Atlantis, our home."

"In other words," Laura said with great disappointment, "Colonel Sheppard's responsibility streak is larger then ever."

"I'm afraid so, and unfortunately…he is right." Teyla held up her hand as the girls began to protest. "I am fine," she looked around at their faces to be sure they believed her, "for now, this is what he wants." The girls still looked a little unsure. "I could have gone with him, but I feel the same sense of responsibility to my people. Being a leader requires tough decisions at times."

Teyla took a good look around at the girls sitting with her. This is what she wished when they had last seen each other. She had wished they didn't have to go… and to be able to remain a member of John's team, those he considered family. She grinned at the girls, for now she was content.