Thanks for all the reviews! Glad I had some of you fooled...lol.

Straight Edge Queen- Thanks! :)

BEG75- Yes, this is what you do to us with MOB!!

lemmonpie- Thanks! Glad you liked it!

Berries-R-Blue- Yes, it was apoor Louie. Jack wasn't very compassionate was he? LOL

MissIndependent101- I had to keep leading you all on for at least the first part...lol. Glad you liked it!

I heard the faint whispers of a man and a woman. I wasn't sure what they were saying and I didn't know who they were, they sounded so far away. I groaned and tried to pry my eyes open as the male's voice got closer.

"That's it, Jack. Open your eyes." the made told me. I froze when a tiny whimper filled the room.

"Em?" I croaked. I heard a short laugh as I finally open my lids. I blinked a few times and let my eyes adjust to the light in the room. I looked around and noticed I was in a hospital bed with tubes going in and out of me. I looked over to the corner where I had heard the man's voice and I froze when Fowler stepped from the shadows, holding Emilie. He had her pressed to him with a knife to her neck.

"Hello, Jackie boy." he grinned sadistically. Emilie looked over at me sadly and I tried to get up but I couldn't. I looked down and my arms and legs were in restraints.

"Let her go." I managed to choke out. Fowler laughed and moved closer to the bed. I felt the bed jerk a little the he moved Emilie's knee's into the end of my bed.

"Now, now Jack. Don't get to worked up. You need to relax and stay calm." he told me. I glared at him and watched tears fall down Emilie's cheeks.

"She didn't do anything to you. Just let her go." I pleaded with him. He smirked and tucked his knife away and grab a fist full of her hair.

"No, she hasn't done anything to me…" he said and looked at her. "Yet." She let out a sob as he pushed her over the bed rail and pressed her head into the bed. I looked at him as he rubbed himself against her as she lay bent over.

"Let her go, Fowler." I warned.

"Why? So you can get her back and let some other punk get to her? You're worthless. Blame yourself for this, Mercer. You've been nothing more than a fuck up and you will never amount to any more than that. She deserves better than you." he hissed. Fowler yanked her up by the hair and pulled her back to him.

"I swear to God, Fowler, if you don't fucking let her go, I will kill you!" I seethed.

"Aww don't act like you care now, Jackie." he smirked and nuzzled the side of Emilie's face. "She's in good hands." he winked. I saw her face contort with horror and I watched as Fowler's hand slowly made it's way down to front of her pants.

"Stop it!" I yelled as she cried out. I saw the front of her pants move and I knew he wasn't faking. I looked up at him as he licked his lips and sighed.

"Oh, so wet and so tight." he moaned. I leaned up as far as I could and pulled the restraints.

"Stop touching her! Stop it!" I screamed in vain.

All of a sudden the lights were gone except for one, right above Emilie. She looked at me with hollow and empty eyes.

"Diddle." I whispered.

"You promised, Jack." she cried. "Even after death."

I screamed and yelled as I watched as she disappeared. I stopped when I felt my chest tighten. My hands were free when I grasped my gown and tried to even my breathing. I saw the doctors and nurses run in and lay my back on the bed.

I can't leave her, I won't leave her. She needs me, I can't let her down. I have to prove her wrong. Please, please don't let me die…

I felt my eyes start to close and a bright light washed over the room again.

"Jackie." a voice cried. I opened my eyes, surprised to find it was so easy and looked around. I wasn't in the hospital anymore, it looked like…

Heaven.

I looked down at myself and saw I was wearing all white. I turned around and saw Ma.

"Ma?" I whispered. She didn't look at me and I walked closer.

"Don't." she told me sternly. My face wrinkled in confusion as I stared at her. "I asked you one thing and one thing only." she started and finally looked at me, her eyes hard. "I asked you to protect her!"

"Ma, you-you don't understand." I stuttered.

"I understand it as well as I saw it!" she yelled at me. "You let her down. You gave her to Fowler. How could you be so weak?!"

I felt hot tears pour down my face as I stared at her. This was not my Ma. She never acted this way and she never would. Something's not right. It has to be a dream…

"I tried, Ma. I tried." I whispered. She stepped up to me and held my chin in her hands.

"Well, you failed." she seethed and vanished. I felt my body jerk again and slowly the white disappeared and I was back in the hospital room. I looked into the eyes of a doctor and screamed when I saw it was Sweet.

"Welcome back, Jack!" he grinned and pulled out his gun. "Still can't protect her, huh?" he asked and cocked the gun. I let out a loud scream and he pulled the trigger.

I shot up from the bed and panted. I looked around quickly and sighed when I realized it was a dream. I grabbed the clock next to the bed and groaned.

3:26am

I looked over at her tiny body next to me and smiled. Her legs were tangled with mine in the bed sheets and her hair was laying all over the place. I brushed the stray strands off her face before getting out of bed.

'It would kill her if I told her.' I thought to myself. I yawned and rubbed my face as I walked to the bathroom.

After relieving my aching bladder I laid back down with Emilie and pulled her to me.

"I can't promise I won't leave you, one day I will have to. But I can promise that when I go, it'll only be because of the man up above. And if anyone dare try and take me before that, I'll fight to the death." I whispered to her. I kissed her head before I went back to sleep.

All I could do was scream. I almost couldn't move as I stared at Jack and the gunman. I yelled and ran over, shaking Jack and trying to move him, but he wouldn't budge. I stopped shaking him and looked around. Everything was still and silent. I turned around to look for Bobby and Angel but all of sudden hands gripped my arms and pulled me around.

"Jack." I whimpered looking into his hard eyes. His hands were gripping my arms so hard, I knew there would be bruises.

"It's all your fault." he hissed. I felt tears fill my eyes and stared at him. I tried to say something but stopped when I saw blood seep through his shirt and then pour out his mouth.

"You did this. I should have stayed in LA. I should have stayed away from you." she whispered and fell down to the ground. I kneeled next to him as Bobby and Angel ran over. They shoved me out the way as Jack took his last breath. I let out a sob and they turned to glare at me.

"Stay away!" Bobby yelled. "You killed Jack and my Ma!" I shook my head as he yelled at me. I got to my feet and took off down the street.

They were right I killed them.

"Where do you think you're going?" a voice cackled from behind me. I turned to see the icy glare of my aunt.

"You." I seethed and glared at her.

"Ah yes, me." she smiled. "Now do you see why I took Richie away from you?" she grinned and my heart fell. "He would have died just like everyone else! You kill everyone you get near. My sister and brother-in-law, Abigail, Evelyn Mercer, and now your precious Jack."

"I did not! They were accidents. I had nothing to do with them dying. They were taken from me!" I cried and stormed over to her. I swung my hand at her but it flew through her face.

"You're cursed. It's as simple as that Emilie." she smiled. "When you start to love someone, their death clock starts ticking faster and faster. It will never change."

"Stop it!" I begged.

"You're worthless." she yelled.

"Stop it! Shut up!" I screamed and covered my ears but they were ripped from my head. I looked behind me to see Jack holding my hands.

"Unlovable." he whispered.

"No, please!" I sobbed and fell to the ground. He kneeled in front of me and smirked.

"You're a murderer." he whispered.

"Jackie, no. I love you!" I cried and reached out for him. I saw his face soften and he rubbed my cheek.

"I know, Emilie. That's how I got here in the first place." he told me softly. "Crash and burn, Emilie. Crash and burn."

My eyes popped open I stared at the ceiling. I felt my lip and I couldn't stop the hot tears that poured down my face. I brought the blanket up to cover my face and try to muffle my soft cries. I pressed it to my face and pulled it down while exhaling. I looked over at Jack and sniffed.

'It would kill him if I told him.' I thought. I kissed his forehead as I sat up in bed to look over him. I sighed when I read the red LED lights.

7:57am.

I moved the covers from my legs and slowly got out of bed. I was putting my robe on when an arm snaked around my waist and drug me back into bed. I giggled and let him pull me across the bed and into his chest. I turned over so I was facing him and his lips were instantly on mine. The dream faded away as we kissed and I knew it would never be more than just that. A dream, no a nightmare. Jack loved me. I could tell by his kiss, by his touch and by the look in his eyes.

"Good morning." he whispered. I smiled and ran a finger across his face.

"Morning. You hungry?" I asked. His eyes opened and a grin spread across his face. "Jack." I warned, knowing his mind was going somewhere that we couldn't go. He pouted and sat up next to me.

"When am I not hungry?" he asked. I laughed and scooted out from his grip and finally stood up.

"Well, get dressed and I'll start breakfast." I told him and walked out. I made my way into the kitchen and looked around.

"What do I wanna make?" I thought out loud. I bit my lip and opened fridge. I pulled out the eggs, cut up ham, cheese and milk. I grabbed a bowl from the cabinet and started making omelet's. I pulled a pan out and set it on the stove. I mixed the all the eggs and ham together and added a bit of milk before pouring it in the pan. I smiled when I felt two arms come across my middle and looked over my shoulder.

"Ohh, yes." he moaned and snatched a piece a ham. I slapped his wrist and watched him limp over to the table. "So uh, you know Christmas is in like three days?" he asked.

"Yes, I do and I do wish you wouldn't remind me, I have yet to go shopping." I sighed and folded the omelet. I heard his deep laugh and my lips curved up. I'd never tire of hearing that.

"Well, we still got four days. We can go to the mall, if you want?" he offered. I laid his omelet on the plate and took it over to him. He had his hurt leg resting on another chair and was leaned back in his own chair.

"Your leg." I pointed out. He smirked and leaned forward.

"If walking on my leg and maybe getting it sore gets me out of the house, I'll live." he smirked.

"Weren't you the one saying you didn't wanna leave the house?" I asked, laughing. He cut into his omelet and took a bit before answering.

"Yes, but I lied. I'm tired of sitting in anyone's house 24/7. So take me to the mall, woman!" he demanded and slammed his fist on the table. I laughed and leaned over to kiss him.

"Maybe." I teased. He pouted and cut off a piece of omelet and held it out to me. I leaned closer to get it but he pulled it away.

"Jackie." I whined. He smirked and raised his brow.

"Emilie." he said, trying not to laugh. I stared at him and rolled my eyes.

"Fine. I'll take you to the damn mall." I gave in. He held the fork back out and I stared at him as I leaned in to take it. He didn't move away and I snatched the piece off the fork with my mouth. I smiled and he started eating again. "So what do you want for Christmas?" I asked. He had the fork half way to his mouth when he stopped and looked over at me for a few seconds and started eating again.

"Nothing." he mumbled through the food in his mouth.

"Nothing?" I asked. "You have to want something." I told him. He shook his head and focused on his plate. I stared at him oddly but let the subject fall as he limped over to the sink and washed his plate. I watched as he silently made his way back to my room and closed the door.

I wondered if I did something wrong, or said something bad. Maybe he was upset that this was the first Christmas without Evelyn. I wasn't sure but whatever it was he didn't want to talk about it so I wasn't going to push, yet.

We were dressed and ready to go to the mall when Emilie's house phone rang. I groaned and leaned against the door as she ran over to answer it.

"Hello?" she answered quickly. I watched her nod her head and look at me before speaking again. "Yes, we'll be there. Thank you." she smiled and hung up.

"Where are we going?" I asked as she walked over to me.

"To your doctor. He's going out of town for a month and wants to see you before he goes. So you might get that air cast today." she smiled. I ran my fingers through my hair and sighed.

"Yes!" I softly yelled and smiled down at her. "Let's go." I hurried.

We drove over to the doctor's office and only waited a few minutes before the nurse called us back to the room. I sat up on the table and laid back waiting for the doctor.

"I can't wait until this is all over with. It's only a constant reminder of what happened and all I want to do is forget about it." I sighed covering my face. I felt Emilie's hand cover on of mine and let it fall to the side.

"I'm going to have a scar." I told her. Her eyes shot over to my shoulder and bit her lip.

"It's not healed all the way yet. It might fade." she whispered. I understood her trying to be positive and I kissed her knuckles. She smiled and we both looked over as the door opened.

"Hello, Jack." Dr. Burns greeted. "Emilie. How are you two today?" he asked. I sat up and looked at him as he pulled up the roller chair.

"It would get a lot better if you took this thing off me." I told him, honestly, pointing down to the black cast that stopped just under my knee.

"Well, we are going to see about that." he smiled and took out his notebook. I saw Emilie fidget and looked over at her.

"What?" I asked, smirking at her discomfort. She looked at me with a strained face and I laughed. "go use the bathroom." she stopped and glared at me.

"I don't have to pee." she declared and the doctor laughed.

"I know that face. I'll be fine, just go pee." I told her. She smirked and gave me a kiss before leaving. I shook my head as she shut the door behind her.

"She's a trip, eh?" Dr. Burns smiled. I laughed and nodded.

"You have no idea."

I couldn't believe Jack knew me as well as he did. I mean, he knew my bathroom face, for god's sake. I liked that though. He knew all my faces, all my sounds, all my moods and all my smiles. He knew me almost better than I knew myself.

I didn't bother going back into the room after I used the bathroom. I walked out into the waiting room and picked up a magazine. Unfortunately, the only one's there were bridal magazines and baby magazines. I grabbed the bridal magazine and flipped through the pages, looking at the dresses, rings and different people's experiences. I never realized how much there needed to be done for a wedding.

"That's a good way to scare a man off." Jack said. I looked up and saw him smirking at me and nodded to the magazine in my hand. I sent him a playful glare and set it down.

"It was that or baby magazines." I told him. He laughed and rubbed his chin.

"Yeah, the baby one would have made me run faster." he told me.

"What you got something against marriage and kids?" I asked, teasing. He looked at me and shook his head.

"We're so not talking about this right now." he laughed. I laughed with him and looked down at his leg. The cast was gone.

"It's gone!" I squealed and hugged him.

"Yes, but he has to wear this air cast during the day. He can take it off at night and for shower's. He still should use at least one crutch or try to put as little pressure on it unless he feel's it's okay. If it gets sore, don't stand on it. I gave you another refill on your pain meds, I know Christmas is coming up and we don't want a grumpy Jack that's in pain, right Em?" Dr. Burns joked.

"No, we don't. Plus, he's been staying at my place and I have lots of stairs." I told him. He nodded and handed me his prescription and I shook his hand.

"Thanks, Doc." Jack smiled and shook his hand.

"No problem. If anything happens you both have my home number, just call. If all feels better in three weeks, you can take the cast off. I'd like to see you walk in here in four weeks, alright?" he smiled. We nodded and thanked him again before leaving.

The mall was packed.

No, that was an understatement.

The mall was crammed full and it was almost 5pm. I knew we wouldn't have but a few hours to shop so that meant we would have to come back tomorrow. That would be our last day, seeing as Christmas Eve was the day after that. But at least, we had the last minute sales.

"We should make a list of who to shop for." I suggested as we walked into the mall. We stopped on the side of the hallway and looked at each other.

"Let's get the girls first, incase we don't get to finish." Jack told me. I smirked and crossed my arms.

"I thought you didn't like kids?" I asked, remembering his comment at the doctor's office. He held up a finger and shook it.

"I didn't say that." he told me. "I said it was a way to scare me off and I also said I didn't want to talk about it." I couldn't help but feel a tad hurt but I brushed it off. Kids were far from the present so there wasn't any need to argue about it.

"Alright. Well, I agree. We should get the girls first then shop for everyone else." I agreed and pulled out my list. Jack looked over and beamed.

"Danni, wants a guitar?" he asked. I laughed and nodded my head.

"Yeah, a few days after you woke up Jerry took me to the house to get some clothes and Danni went to your room. I heard noise and walked in and she was plucking the strings on your guitar. She asked me if she got a guitar one day if you would teach her." I smiled as we walked down the hallway. Jack's grin spread across his face and he looked over at me.

"I'll get her a guitar and I'll teach her." he smiled. "What else doe she want and what does Amelia want?" I opened my list back up and looked down.

"Amelia asked me a while back why you guys called me Diddle." I told him and saw his face fall. "I didn't tell her about my parents but I told her it was a from an old nursery rhyme. Well, she asked me to sing it to her-"

"You sang to her before singing to me?" Jack asked, half serious, half hurt.

"I didn't sing it. I told her what it was and she liked it. Anyways, Paisley was passing by the old book store off of Main St., and spotted this huge book of lullaby's, nursery rhymes and poems. I want to get that for her." I smiled. He nodded and looked at the list.

"But other than that, they just want girly, kid stuff?" he asked. I laughed and nodded.

"Yes. Girly, kid stuff."

We spent the next four hours walking around the mall and getting aggravated each time someone nearly ran us over. It wasn't as bad as we thought though. There was a lot of people there but they were all spaced out and starting to leave by the time we got there. Jack's eyes nearly bugled out of his head when we walked into the toy store.

"There's so much pink and blue." he whispered. I laughed and pulled him down the girl's aisle.

"It's a toy store, it's supposed to be." I smirked and continued to shop.

By the end of the day we had the girl's shopped for. I let Jack get Daniella a guitar. We didn't want to get her a real guitar but we got her a starter guitar. We also managed to find her a tiny work station for school. It had pencils, crayons, markers and tiny note pads with different Disney characters on them. I figured it would give her the motivation to do school work. I was going to stop by the book store on the way home to get Amelia's present. But at the mall we found her a pretty Porcelain Doll and got her a new pair of shoes.

"I've never been in a book store before." Jack stated as I held the door open for him. I rolled my eyes and walked in after him.

"Can you even read?" I teased. He shot me a glare and looked around.

"What are we looking for again?" he asked.

"A big book of nursery rhymes. Look over in the children's section and I'll go find an employee." I told him and walked off.

I watched her walk off and slowly made my way over to the children's section. Why was today full of kids talk? I knew I had been an ass every time she joked with me but it was a touchy subject with me. I loved Daniella and Amelia but it wasn't kids in general that bugged me. It was the thought of my kids, that bugged me. It was a long, sore subject that I knew I'd have to explain to Emilie one day, especially after seeing the hurt on her face after I blew it off twice.

I walked down a tiny aisle and looked around. As I scanned the books I heard a tiny grunt. I walked around the corner and saw a tiny girl reaching for a book that was out of her reach. She was on her toes and had a determined look on her face. I smirked and walked over to her. She looked up at me sadly and I grabbed the book she was reaching for. She smiled up at me and took the book from me.

"Thank you, sir." she whispered. I nodded and watched her run off. I felt someone behind me and turned to see Emilie. By the look on her face I knew she was what I had done and I knew she wanted to say something but she didn't.

"I found it." she smiled softly and held up and old book. I nodded and walked with her to the checkout.

We didn't say much on our way home but the urge to say something was killing both of us. We never had the family discussion or talked about anything that we wanted in our future. Too much had happened since I got back for us to even go on a real date much less talk about marriage and kids. But I decided that night was time we touched the subject.

"I'm sorry about being such an ass today." I apologized as I took another bite of meatloaf. Emilie looked up at me, surprised that I was talking about it.

"It's alright. Some people just don't like kids." she told me softly. I leaned across the table and grabbed her hand.

"It's not that I don't like kids, Em. I do, I love kids." I told her.

"Then why brush me off like that?" she asked. I could see the confusion and hurt in her eyes. I did more than just brush it off, I hit a spot with her. A bad spot.

"I just," I sighed and rubbed my face. "I don't know if I want to have kids of my own." I told her honestly. She stared at me and set her fork down.

"Why?" she asked.

"I don't know." I shrugged.

"I want kids." she told me quickly. "I want to get married and have kids with my husband. Family means a lot to me, Jack. And I know it means a lot to you too but that's what I want. I want to give my children what my parents never got to give me." she confessed. I nodded and looked down at the table.

"I don't know I if can give you that, Emilie." I whispered. I didn't have to look at her to know she was crying. I heard the shaky breath she took in and exhaled.

"I didn't ask you to give me that." she replied cooly. Her response shocked me and I finally looked up at her. She must have seen the shock in my eyes and her face fell. "Sorry."

"It's alright." I whispered. "Listen, Em, I love you. I love you with all my heart and I can't see myself with anyone else in the world. But there's a lot I have to come to terms with before I think about marriage and especially kids. But I don't want this to ruin us, I don't want this to hurt us." I told her softly. She looked up at me and smiled.

"It's not." she promised and walked over to sit on my lap. "I don't want to talk about it either. I don't want that right now. Right now, I want us to make up for the past year or so. I want us to become an us and have fun. We can think about the future when it comes, okay?" she smiled. I leaned up to kiss her but she pulled back. I gave her a confused look before she smiled and touched my nose with hers.

"And I love you, too." she said before kissing me.