Part Two: Spring
Chapter Six: The Bei Fong Ball, Part One
Mai,
I'm sorry that I haven't written to you lately, and I didn't think you'd want to hear from me again. I just wanted to let you know that I'm leaving the North Pole. I have the Avatar's forgiveness, and I plan on traveling to Ba Sing Se to seek an audience with the Earth King.
Please forgive me for neglecting our correspondence these past few weeks. I've been busy.
Zuko
--
The first few letters to Mai had taken hours to write. They were long and elaborate, because he had missed her. Those were the nights where the Waterbender had ignored and shunned him, where the Avatar lay dying on a mat and the waves rolled underneath his shadow of a boat. Those were the nights where he longed for someone to understand, and Mai had, in her sarcastic and dry manner, miles and miles away.
Now, his letters were more or less forced, more out of courtesy than out of affection. The parchment lay on the table, illuminated by the faintest flicker of candlelight.
He turned as his door creaked open and Katara stepped inside without a greeting.
"Aang's alright?" His words were more of a statement than a question, and he turned back to face the table, not really wanting to hear the answer.
"He's doing fine." The words were a little too fake to be taken seriously. "I expected you to be asleep, really. I shouldn't have come in like this."
"It's alright." He turned back to the letter, which lay blank and bare on the table. It looked incomplete, almost, and he found himself picking his calligraphy brush up as Katara watched silently. She walked over, in that straightforward way of hers, and sat on his bed. If Zuko cared, he didn't make it evident. She raised an eyebrow as he dipped the tip of the brush in his inkwell, held it millimeters from the paper, and then set it down with a small tap on the table.
"I didn't know you wrote letters."
It's not your business. The prince bit back the words before they escaped his mouth, but the look he gave her was warning enough. "They asked me to keep them updated."
The Waterbender nodded, not really stopping to inquire exactly who "they" were. She knew well enough who he was writing to, and knew it was better not to interfere. Instead, she waiting, and the silence overwhelmed them both until the prince spoke up.
"I'm leaving tomorrow."
If the girl showed any surprise at this, she didn't show it and gave a small nod. The candlelight flickered in the dark.
"You've got a lot of places you need to be. Where will you go?"
"Ba Sing Se. I need to gain the Earth King's forgiveness as well." A short pause, and he looked up from the table. "I've already spoken to Chief Arnook about the negotiations my uncle's planning on making with the Northern Water Tribe. I figured that I might as well write to him and let him know."
It was an extremely unconvincing lie, but Katara pretended to believe it nonetheless. "Good to know."
"Yeah." He closed his eyes for a minute, letting the weariness of the day overtake him for a moment. "Are you sure that Aang will be fine?"
"You've already gotten us this far, Zuko, and that's enough." She sighed. "Thanks for everything, and thank your uncle for us, too."
"It was what I had to do." His eyes flickered open and settled on the Waterbender.
It was a partly true answer, and somewhat acceptable. It wasn't complete.
She turned away, and the waves rolled under her feet. Zuko had been sleeping in his ship's cabin the entire time he had been here, and in a matter of hours, he would be leaving. Why did it feel like she was all alone now, even with Aang and her entire culture surrounding her in this city of ice?
Zuko had been a sort of comfort. A sort of shield against the problems she had to face. She had always known he would be there, and she had always known she could rely on him. He was a familiar prescence now, just like Sokka and Toph had been to her when Aang had been shot down by Azula. She hated being called dependent, but secretly, she knew she was. It didn't hurt as much to realize this as much it hurt to see a companion leave her again.
Now it was herself and Aang. Aang, a dying boy. Soon, she would be alone and cold in this frozen land.
--
When she went to tell her best friend that Zuko was leaving, he listened with closed eyes and a straight line of a mouth.
The young Avatar that pretended to sleep felt nothing when the girl left. Nothing except a tinge of relief that Zuko was going and a bitter recollection of how Katara's voice had softened when she spoke the prince's name. How there was a vague sort of sadness that lay underneath her words when she had said,
"It's just you and me now."
There was no happiness to her tone that night. There was no joy at seeing the enemy leave, and no evident relief. Just something weary in her eyes and something desperate in her smile and something that said she would rather run away with Zuko than stay and tend to this mangled, bloodied boy.
Go on then, a part of him thought. Go. Run and swim and walk and do all those things that I can't. Go with Zuko and stop caring about me.
Although, he noted with a faint twinge of guilt in his heart, the majority of him almost delighted in Katara's sadness. Because it was one less chance of having her fall into the prince's arms and sail away with him. It was one less chance of hearing news of the Fire Lord's new wife as he lay in his sickbed, his breaths becoming more and more faint as a new royal couple danced miles away.
It was one less chance of having Zuko and Katara love each other, and one more chance of having her love him, but he couldn't forget how that sadness leaked through her words and made him feel like a person caught in a downpour of guilt.
It's just you and me now, Katara.
--
There was no farewell hug or sentimentals. Just a spoken "Goodbye" and another "Thank you" for good measure.
The ship creaked underneath his feet, and he could feel the separation already. There was an ache in his heart that was starting to build, and he knew.
It was the same feeling he had felt when he was banished from the Fire Nation. It was the same feeling he had felt when he had left Mai to help Aang learn Firebending, and the pain of old memories stung him almost as harshly as the biting cold air. One emotion overshadowed them all, though, and it was impossible to put a name to it.
It was a swirl of things, a blur of emotions, but when you subtracted the confusion and the guilt and the remorse, the core thing there was a longing feeling called love.
He didn't want to acknowledge it again, really. After seeing the edge to Mai's words in her last letter, the heartbreak in the young Avatar's eyes, and the quiet desperation the Waterbender seemed to carry with her, he wasn't even sure if there were such a thing as love anymore. Maybe a fleeting affection, like the one he had felt with the girl he had left behind, that faded into nothingness. Maybe that was all love ever was.
He didn't care at the moment, just watched as the city turned to a speck of white and the icebergs drifted about his shadow of a ship. He watched as the girl standing at the edge of the water faded into white and disappeared with the city of ice.
"The ball's starting soon, you idiot! You're supposed to be in disguise already!"
This was spoken as harshly as it could possibly be in a darkened closet, and Sokka bit his lip. He was supposed to be in costume, sure, but he had decided to check on Toph first. She had thought of the same thing and had dragged him into an empty hallway to review the plan one last time.
Hey, what could really be said? Great minds thought alike.
She shook her head and sighed. "Alright, so the first few guests are arriving in about an hour. I'm supposed to be in my torture device of a dress, so they're probably looking all over for me right about now. And you're supposed to make your fancy entrance at, say..." She thought for a second. "Alright, you make your fancy entrance at noon. And then-"
"Toph, as good as that sounds, we need something big. Something to show that I mean business."
"Well, you already have those robes. What else do you what? An elephant-boar to ride on?"
"No. All those suitors are gonna be major kiss-ups. The Earth King's nephew should at least attempt to overshadow them."
"Huh. Are you sure you're not gonna do this just so you can impress me?" A hint of sarcasm trickled from the last statement, and a wry smile found its way across Toph's face. "Surprise me, but don't mess everything up."
"Yeah, and at least try not to push someone into the pond."
"Sure, sure. You're not the fancy lady who's getting engaged." She waved him off, although there was no breathing space in the closet for him to retreat to. "Just get into the robes. You got a few hours, so don't worry."
"You're going to be alright?"
"Yeah, although you're responsible if the dress chokes me to death. Jeez, you couldn't have picked something that wouldn't try to kill me?" The Earthbender scoffed, and the sixteen-year-old shrugged despite himself.
"I'd better get going. Mom and Dad're gonna murder me."
"Sure, go ahead." He placed a hand on the knob, remembered something, then glanced back at the girl. "Oh yeah, and Toph?"
"What is it, Snoozles? Ya nervous?" She bit her lip in anxiety, her fingers tapping against the wall. She could hear the servants calling her name down the hallways, and she knew it wasn't ladylike to be "fashionably late". Whatever, she thought. Whatever.
"I just wanted to tell you... happy birthday."
She rolled her eyes in the dark of the closet.
"Not happy birthday, Sokka. Happy getting me outta here."
"Yeah. That."
He creaked the door open, and grinned as the very unladylike footsteps of Toph Bei Fong made their way down the hall.
I try to treat things like nightmares. The bad things, I mean.
Defeating the Fire Lord was real enough. It was a nightmare I couldn't escape. Every day, I could see the pain of the war in the eyes of suffering people.
It's not the wounds I was scared of, though... it was letting people down. It was the dread of giving hope to people and then, just as quickly, snatching it away.
For some reason, I know now that the wounds feel far, far worse than the guilt of failure. Especially when the wounds have been inflicted by words and thoughts and things left unsaid. Especially when they've been inflicted by the one you feared letting down the most.
Toph and Sokka are gone, in Gaoling. Gaoling seems so far away. It's not the miles and the seas and the mountains, but the people. It's hard to remember who they were.
Zuko left, and we're alone now. Katara and me. And although I just want to look at her and tell her to see me, see how much I care for her, I know it's useless to care now. She can't love me, and if I really loved her, I would leave her alone.
I don't know why she can't love me. But I can sense that it's more about me than it is about her. What's wrong with me? What's wrong with loving me?
Everyone's gone.
The General's Robe Comes With:
- One hat (one that Sokka had placed in a "dashing manner" upon his head)
- One cape (that was unnecessarily long, and trailed to the floor where it caught several pieces of hay and manure)
- The robe itself (which was so itchy that the boy wearing it nearly toppled into the manger trying to adjust it)
- One extravagantly engraved chestplate that looks extremely out of place.
--
"Ugh... stupid robes. Stupid general. Stupid ball."
The robes were itchy, tight, and extremely ill-fitting. The sun had decided to be unbearably bright and scorching hot (on the other hand, it could just be the robes) that particular spring morning.
The musty air of the stables couldn't be escaped, so he sighed, put his hair down, and tried to figure out a plan of action that would further compliment his "royalty".
"Earth King's nephew, at your service." A flourishing bow, directed at the rotting stable wall. He tried to picture Toph in front of him, trying hard not to laugh. No, she'd probably be trying not to smack him upside the head for no good reason.
Ladies didn't smack prominent Earth Kingdom figures upside the head, so Sokka was somewhat relieved of that. But he also couldn't throw sarcastic remarks Toph's way about the other suitors, unless he wanted to be escorted off the premises or found out. This was a little daunting, as Sokka was convinced he couldn't pass for royalty the entire three days the ball was going to take place. But at least he was going to have his own room in the estate itself.
"Earth King's nephew, at your service" was starting to lose its effect on the stable wall, so he tried a different approach, thought against it, then decided to say nothing at all unless spoken to at the ball itself.
The escape present was hidden in the corner behind stacks of crates. That was going to be the highlight of the ball for Toph, but Sokka didn't feel like he needed to practice any oratical flamboyancy or fancy gestures. Giving the crystals to her was enough, right? Getting her out was enough.
Heroes didn't hesitate and waste time thinking about the details and the fun. Heroes had to think about what needed to be done, right then.
Better to play it safe and tone his act down. Better to stay on the premises instead of getting kicked out.
--
They dabbed powder on her face and put her hair up. They forced her into a robe and pricked her with needles.
It was at these times that Toph appreciated being blind. She knew that if she could possibly look in a mirror and see exactly what they had made her look like, she would immediately proceed to tear everything off.
"Azula wanted us to go visit her today. She said that she wanted to hear what progress we've made."
The pink-clad girl tugged on the other's sleeve repeatedly in an effort to get Mai to listen to her. The sixteen-year-old wrestled her sleeve away with the least amount of annoyance one could show at this time and sighed.
"We haven't made any progress, Ty Lee. Iroh's treating us the same way he's treated everyone."
"But you were with him like... two hours that last time. Didn't he tell you anything?"
"He just offered me tea and talked about peace and the like. He's no different from any old man in the Fire Nation."
"So you guys didn't talk about interesting stuff? Did he tell you anything about Zuko?"
A glare was sent Ty Lee's direction, but the contortionist took no notice (or pretended not to) and grinned.
"So he did!"
"No, he didn't. Zuko's not important."
"Why?" A perfect display of innocence was on Ty Lee's face right now, and as much as Mai would've liked to walk out the door without a word to the girl, she knew that making conversation with her only friend was key to a long-lasting relationship. Or whatever. She just wanted to stall for time.
Visiting Azula at this time wasn't exactly what she had wanted to do, after all.
"Zuko's on his way to Ba Sing Se, miles and miles away. He isn't exactly crucial to this plan."
"But he's your boyfriend."
"That's irrevelant, Ty Lee. Our loyalties lie with Azula."
"That doesn't mean you have to stop liking him. After all, Azula's convinced that we're both completely loyal to her."
"You know Azula. She always thinks ahead, and she's probably already constructed a plan to have us killed if we ever betrayed her."
"Then liking Zuko will be even more interesting!" Ty Lee sat down on Mai's bed, her feet dangling from the side. "You guys are like... forbidden lovers, or something!"
"Get that idea out of your head, Ty Lee. Things aren't as romantic as you make them out to be." The sixteen-year-old slipped a knife into her hand, studying it. She had been exercising her favorite hobby more out of boredom than out of usefulness. The blades were still sharp, polished and deadly.
Sure to kill if sent flying in the right direction.
The pink-clad girl seemed to disregard Mai's comments, and decided to proceed with the discussion. "You know, that Fire Nation rebel hideout Azula sent me to was actually pretty fun. Tons of cute guys there. I hope she sends us both today!"
"As much as the idea of young men sitting around and rebelling excites me, Ty Lee, I'm less than enthused about Azula's plans for us."
"Mai..." She sighed, lowering herself down onto the bed. "We really can't worry too much about these things. It'll all clear up in the end."
"If you say so." The knife twirled haphazardly between her fingers, pivoting in the air.
--
Question: "Mai, you've been quiet. Did you get to our dear Fire Lord yet?"
Answer: "Yes, Azula."
Question: "And how was he?"
Answer: "Fine."
Question: "And he trusts you, without a doubt?"
Answer: "Yes, Azula."
Good, Mai. Good little liar.
She stood to the side while Azula began interrogating Ty Lee. It was the same format. A seemingly general, yet mysterious question. A hesitant, short answer. Azula didn't need details, didn't rely on elaboration. She only wanted the hard facts and drew her plans from them. If she needed any details, she saw them in her visitors' eyes and their tone of voice. She was a people person.
They talked about the rebel hideouts. Ty Lee talked of plans and codenames and schemes. She talked of secret passageways and elite spies.
She didn't mention the cute boys.
A small smirk played at the corners of Azula's crimson lips. Her eyebrows raised, she listened until the pink-clad girl couldn't explain much more.
"Perfect. Mai, Ty Lee?" They raised their heads in acknowledgement, and the Princess smiled in that sickening way of hers. "It's time to join the rebellion."
Noon. Time to crash the party.
He had chopped a few inches off the "Wang Fire" beard, thinking that it would be able to disprove any doubts about his age, and pasted it on pretty haphazardly. It hung like a mop in the humid, hot air, and he found himself sweltering in the heat of the spring afternoon. The reflection proved it: he was no longer Sokka the Boomeraang Guy.
In fact, he was Kuei the Forty-Eighth. Earth King's nephew. Royalty. Peasant in disguise.
He had thought about how to get out many times before, and it was simple, really. He only had to climb out of the loft, use a ladder to get himself down to the bottom of the stable building, and walk to the front of the estate gates. Nobody would guess that he had arrived from the stables- they were at the edge of the estate, and he just needed to get on the path that led to the estate to pretend that he had walked from there. All he would have to do to prove that he was the Earth King's nephew was show the invitation to the ball to the guards at the entrance.
And he had been lucky enough to be the one writing the invitations that the Bei Fongs had sent out. Hey, he had to make himself useful, right?
He climbed to the loft of the stable, climbed out the back window, and stood there, the shade of the trees making his corner of the world a bit more bearable. The piece of parchment hung limp and crumpled in his hands, worn from being folded over and hidden clumsily in pockets.
The Bei Fong estate is pleased to invite you to their celebratory ball...
Everything looked in order.
He was carrying a bag full of the possessions he needed, and had left a few bales of hay on the ground of the stable for Appa. The escape present glistened in the sun as he hurriedly stuffed it in with the rest of his things.
Noon... time to crash the party... pull yourself together, Sokka!
He sauntered onto the path that led to the Bei Fong gates and walked in what he hoped to be a stately manner. It was hard to keep from tripping on his unusually long cape, but it didn't matter. As long as he looked like royalty, nobody was going to notice. He walked, and eventually reached the guards that watched the gate.
"Kuei the Forty-Eighth, Earth King's nephew." He held the invitation up, and the guards scrunitized him with wary eyes.
"I see. And your royal procession?"
"I-er... royal procession?"
"Yes, your majesty. Your servants and guards. Should we be expecting them?"
"Uh, no, no... uh..." Why didn't he think of this? He searched through his head for a plausible explanation when a small voice piped in from behind the men.
"Let him in, guards. My parents recieved the message. His procession got stuck, so he had to walk." Sokka couldn't see Toph from behind the guards, but he felt as if she had been standing there all along. "It seems they've been ambushed by bandits."
"I see, Lady Bei Fong. But this man-"
"I know Kuei from my travels. Let him in, please."
The guards opened the gates almost reluctantly, and Sokka could've hugged the girl standing in front of him if not for the fact that the dozen men standing by would've killed him if he lay a hand on her. He walked in, then, and nearly gaped in disbelief.
The trees were strung with silk lanterns, and the cherry blossoms were in bloom, the pink petals floating in the spring air. A quartet was setting up by the pond, tuning their instruments as the creek flowed under a decorated bridge. Tables of food and refreshments were set up around every tree, and the air whistled with life and vibrance and color. Windchimes tinkled as a warm breeze blew past like rain. The bushes were draped with white streamers and ribbons, making Toph's maze of a garden even more elegant in the spring noon.
This was beautiful... beautiful in the most sickening of ways.
"This is the garden, your highness, where the guests of the ball may rest and converse. It seems as if you had an interesting journey, so you might need to relax a bit." Sokka tried not to wince at the artificial sweetness oozing off of Toph's words, and at the same time, tried not to laugh at the way her eyebrows raised as she lied. The aroma of pastries and tarts wafted through the humidity, and he found himself walking towards the nearest snack table. The blind girl followed him, taking small, ladylike steps. Most guests would mistake this for elegance, when really, Toph found it excruciatingly hard to walk in such a stuffy dress.
"Are you alright, Lady Bei Fong?"
"Yes, your highness." Sokka could see that Toph found it hard to keep from breaking into laughter. "Maybe we should get some shade behind the tree. I find the weather to be unbearable today."
After gingerly picking a tart from one of the platters, he joined the girl in sitting behind the tree. A few chairs had been placed in the secluded area, and he was sure that they were in relative privacy. Not many people had arrived, and he couldn't spot any suitors yet. He was yanked back into the shade by a hand tugging on his oversized sleeve.
"Stop that! We don't need anyone drawing attention to us!" It was spoken in a hushed tone, but with none of the sugary-sweetness Toph had to force into her tone of voice earlier. She found talking in that artificial manner to be vastly entertaining- it was like mocking all the other fancy ladies that were attending the ball.
"Alright, not many people are here. So what's the plan?" Sokka rubbed at his "beard" and was grateful for the shade of the cherry tree.
"Here's the deal. You make sure you don't speak unless spoken to. We don't need any prominent people ratting you out. And as for me, I'll be busy trying to make the other suitors miserable."
"At least try for subtlety."
"Of course. I'll make their stay miserable in the fanciest of ways, don't worry." She gave a little huff and sighed. "You know, I'm glad it's just us for now. The ball isn't even gonna be in the garden."
"You're serious? Then why is this place all decked out?"
"My parents like to make good impressions."
"I can tell."
The two sat in silence under the shade for a moment, and then, Toph promptly stood and brushed herself off with the air of a proper young lady.
"Looks like more people are coming. I better go see who."
"Alright. Good luck."
She sighed and walked away with those ladylike steps again, and for some reason, Sokka found the situation eerily familiar.
The dream I had before. Toph.
The blind Earthbender left, but the memory of her too-sweet smile and her eloquent speaking made him more than uncomfortable. It was Toph. Toph, the tomboy, the girl who embraced dirt and loved kicking rocks in people's faces and laughing when something happened to him. It was Toph, the greatest Earthbender in the world.
Toph, a girl in disguise. A girl hidden under the mask of a lady.
A mask he wanted desperately to rip off.
--
He waited in his guest room for the remainder of the afternoon, not wanting to stay in the heat for so long. A part of him wanted to go outside and help Toph with her endeavors, but common sense told him to stay under the radar. He had to be ready for the ball, anyways, so most of his stay was spent trying to straighten up his unkempt clothing and brushing his fake beard. It was boring, and tedious, and tiring.
He wondered if Toph would be dancing at the ball. And his mind wandered until he wondered what it would be like to dance with her.
He shook the thought off and just sat there, emerald silk underneath the jade of his robes.
Author's Note: This chapter was hard to do, mainly because I've never been to a ball (or a garden party!) so I didn't know how to describe Toph's garden. I'm sorry that the OC Suitors you guys sent in didn't get written into this chapter- it's mainly an introduction to the ball, so there's a lot more to tell. Thank you all for reading and reviewing so far!
In The Next Chapter: Mai and Ty Lee visit the rebel hideouts in the outskirts of the Palace City and try to make a treacherous alliance. Zuko sails to Ba Sing Se, all the while trying to maintain a rocky correspondence with his girlfriend... and a certain Waterbender? Meanwhile, Katara tells Aang an interesting story about the time he defeated Ozai. And in Gaoling, the ball's in full swing... will Sokka succeed in his plans?