Part Two: Spring
Chapter Seven: The Bei Fong Ball, Part Two
She walks like silk and smiles like pain
A porcelain doll under emerald guise
Eyes unseeing, heart unfeeling
Laughter bleak as the night skies
Take her hand. Take her heart
And fly into the silent night
Break her bonds and set her free
And give the blind girl endless sight.
"Katara? Can you tell me something?"
She nodded, although she dreaded the conversation. She thought she knew what it was going to be about, and although a part of her wanted to confront the situation, she had never brought herself around to think of any possible solutions. Instead, Aang sat up and looked straight at her, grey eyes studying her face thoughtfully.
"You never actually told me how I beat Fire Lord Ozai."
Part of her sighed in relief, yet she was a bit disappointed. Her fingers, cloaked in light blue water, gently stroked the cuts that scarred his left arm.
"I didn't think you'd have wanted to know... not in this state."
"Well, maybe I didn't. Once. But now, I just feel like I need to remember how I brought him down."
"Is there any reason for that?"
"Well..." He looked away from her and sighed. "I want to know this because I see all these wounds and I don't know how I got them. Because I want to feel like I did something and didn't fail everyone after one blow."
She sighed and brought her fingers down. Most of Aang's external injuries were healing fairly well, and although still weak, the boy could sit up for longer periods of time before growing too tired to talk. Either way, Katara's visits were usually short and generally impersonal. She just felt that it was her responsibility as a friend to check up on him, despite the tension in the air whenever his eyes met hers.
"Alright, Aang. Just tell me when you're tired."
--
The air was heavy with smoke and hot with flames. She ran, despite the fumes and the growing clouds of black smoke and the barrage of fire that mazed the palace. The ground quaked under her feet, and she nearly glanced back to see how Toph was holding off the throngs of Fire Nation soldiers that surrounded her. She coughed, looked around, and caught the faintest glance of a tattooed hand before turning her full attention to the area beyond.
Firebenders guarded the throne room, no doubt trying to protect their leader. She lashed out with a wave of water that would hopefully clear the soldiers long enough to gain access to the room, but just as quickly, more guards surrounded the door and shot blasts of fire at the two invaders trying to fend them off. She heard the sound of wind cutting through the air, and saw the soldiers fall around them and be replaced by more. There were too many... there were too many soldiers and not enough time. She turned to the Airbender, who had just blocked an incoming blast of flames with a sheet of earth, and shouted above the wreckage.
"Get in there! I'll hold them off!"
The water surrounded her in a large ring - the octopus form. She lashed out and blocked every attack, the water bending to her will, as the Airbender evaded fire and shot flames to counter the ones that were directed at him.
"No, Katara. I'm staying here. There's too many- you can't hold them off alone!"
"Just go, Aang. Go!"
She winced as fire grazed her arms from every direction, and quickly lashed out with weapons of her own. Soon, the area was all but cleared, and she looked around, scanning the area in anticipation for more soldiers. "Aang, I'll be fine. I'll meet you in the throne room."
"No, you'll be-"
"Just go. I'll be fine!" She glanced around her, caught in the wave of Firebenders surrounding them again, and turned to the Avatar that flanked her back. "It's now or never, Aang."
She lifted a sheet of water to block the flames shot in her direction and lashed out with a waterwhip of her own, and in the corner of her eye, she saw a lithe shape knock the guards that protected the door to the ground with a sheet of wind and break the door down with a thud.
"I've never walked to the edge of the Palace City before. It's so plain."
"But there's a lot of neat places here. There's this store where they sell robes, and I saw one that would look gorgeous on you!"
"We're not here to look for robes, Ty Lee. We're here on another stupid order from Azula."
"Yeah, but maybe we could go shopping afterwards!"
The two walked down the cobbled streets, their shoes making clicking sounds on the sun-baked bricks that tiled the roads. Although evening, the air was hot and humid - typical Fire Nation weather. Ty Lee had always wondered how Mai was able to withstand the heat of the sun, but had never fully voiced it. The older girl was evidently annoyed at being dragged into the streets, and asking her questions was no way to make her companion more amiable.
"You sure you know where this hideout of yours is?"
"Of course I do! Azula's sent me here dozens of times last week. I think I've gained their trust."
"Or maybe you've been flirting so much with them that they hardly consider you a theat."
"It's not like I can help it! Those boys are really nice."
"Or in your case, nice looking..."
"That too."
They rounded a corner until they came to a derelict path that veered slightly off the street. The scattered remains of broken-down shops and crashed wheelbarrows cast long shadows across the streets. Boxes littered the ground, and an overbearing stench made the two wrinkle their noses. It was a dead end, three walls blocking it off from the rest of the streets that surrounded it. This corner was empty and unassuming, and Mai nearly rolled her eyes.
"How cliche. A deserted alley. These rebels are pretty uncreative when it comes to hideouts."
"It's the best they can do in this part of the city. And keep down-" She glanced around warily, looking for signs of passerby. "Pretty much nobody comes here, but we should keep our voices down just in case."
"Whatever." The sixteen-year-old frowned as Ty Lee knocked on the left wall three times. A brick in the wall shifted, and Mai could make out two hazel eyes staring back into Ty Lee's grey ones. He scrunitized the acrobat, and asked:
"How many messenger hawks were dispatched?"
"Two. And I know that you know who I am!" Ty Lee gave the person on the other side a broad grin, which made Mai cringe a little. "Can we get in already?"
"No. From whom were they sent?"
A crazy princess, Mai grumbled, as Ty Lee responded, "The wilting flower."
"And what do they seek?"
"Sunlight to nourish her."
For a second, Mai thought that some mechanism would allow the wall to swing open, but instead, the hazel eyes disappeared. She groaned in exasperation and eyed Ty Lee with a "this was a waste of time" glare, which her companion had grown accustomed to and learned its meaning.
"Relax, Mai. I'm pretty sure they haven't changed the code." She walked out of the alley and turned back onto the road, stopping at the house nearest the alley. A grin on her face, she knocked briskly on the door, then swung it open.
"If you were going to open it, why bother knocking?"
"Just to let them know we're here." Ty Lee stepped inside, and beamed as the two walked to three boys sitting around a table. They weren't much older than the two girls were, and it was this fact that immediately made Mai skeptical. The impulsive actions of three teenage boys weren't going to do much to Iroh, and the sixteen-year-old already knew that the Dragon of the West could take all three of them all with relevant ease. If Azula was looking for these rebels for support, she wasn't going to find a lot of it.
"Hey! We were wondering when we'd see you again!" One of the young men grinned and waved, much to Ty Lee's pleasure and Mai's annoyance. Everywhere they went, some boy had to fall for the acrobat. A "rebel hideout" couldn't be much different.
"I brought my friend too, if that's alright."
"Sure." One of the young men stood up and extended a hand to Mai. He seemed to be the oldest of the bunch, and could've been someone she had known before. She couldn't tell. The three of the boys didn't look very prominent, but their attire suggested otherwise. It was enough to make the girl wonder why a bunch of noblemen's sons were running around trying to overthrow a government.
The boy looked at her expectantly, as if he actually thought that Mai would take his hand. She just whipped a knife out casually and started pivoting it, and the boy stepped back hesitantly.
"She's, uh... a knife thrower. Just like I can do chi-blocks and such." Ty Lee shot the young men a nervous grin, and bit her lip. This wasn't going too well. Ty Lee could tell that Mai thought this was some joke, and quickly tried to dissuade such a notion. "Uh... can I show her around?"
"Sure. If you two are planning on joining the rebellion, you've gotta know where you'll be working." The boy that waved to Ty Lee stood up and walked towards the two. "I'll show you both around."
"Thanks!" Ty Lee shot him a sweet smile, and Mai almost groaned as the boy took her hand.
Great, Azula. Just wonderful. Tell us to join a rebellion and you lead us directly to a bunch of idiot nobles playing games.
For once, though, Mai felt a bit relieved. Azula failed. She and Ty Lee had failed. And Iroh was safe for now.
Zuko was alone on his ship again. Alone, for an entirely different reason.
He didn't even know why he was on this ship, anyways. Before, with Katara on board, he had a purpose. A drive. A mission to keep Aang safe and get Katara to the North Pole. Now that it was over, he had no idea what he was doing drifting in an empty sea. He knew his plan well enough to have laid an outline in his head. First to the North Pole, then Ba Sing Se, then to the various other places he and his nation had stormed.
The various other places. The entire world. It made no difference.
Zuko, crown prince of the Fire Nation, was never coming home again.
It wasn't as if he had anything to look forward to. After all, Mai was being her emotionless, empty, selfish self. He had no idea how Iroh was doing, and he wasn't in any hurry to ask. He had been the one who had sent him out here, after all. If it weren't for him, he would be back at home eating fruit tarts with Mai. If it weren't for him, he wouldn't have the Avatar's silent hatred burning into his head like a memory and have the lingering feeling of not belonging.
But if it weren't for Fire Lord Iroh, Zuko wouldn't have known the extent of Katara's kindness. And maybe it was what he had been sent out here for all along. To learn and to know and to feel the world at peace for once in his life.
It was amazing to him that after all he had done to her and her people, after all that time he had wasted trying to fight her, that she could still talk to him in that way of hers. And it was in the real world, not the glossed, walled Fire Nation city where the nobles and ladies made forced conversations and faked empty smiles. It was true kindness, not artificial love.
It felt so wrong, though, to think that Mai's love could've been artificial. He had looked at her steel-cut words, seen the sarcasm and hurt and unbearably cold words scrawled on those pieces of parchment, and had felt a sudden desire to rip them all apart and burn them until they were ashes on the table. But there was something else. There was an invisible force that prevented him from reaching out and cutting all bonds with the girl he used to love. And it was a debt, a debt he had yet to repay. She had saved his life, not out of reverence for his interests, but because she had loved him.
Loved him. Despite the devastation he had dealt her in his parting words and the heartbreak he had wrought upon her, she had lashed out with silver blades and spilled blood for him at the Boiling Rock. He remembered when the prison in the Palace City had been searched for war prisoners and he had stood outside, waiting and watching for anybody of interest. He found two, ragged, worn, almost invisible. And there she had been, standing straight and slim and perfectly cold as always, standing in a prison uniform that had never been meant to be hers.
It was this thought that made him hold her last letter in his hand and made him glance at the words that her hand had carefully inscribed and the thoughts, however bitter, that she still held. The thoughts that she still bothered to write and tell him about. It was a bit more comforting to know that there was still somebody out there, thinking of him. Even if those thoughts had turned to resentment and anger.
It was proof that he wasn't supposed to be out here, and even more motivation to get his sorry self back home as soon as he could. It was a driving force, something that made him want to go back and fix it, to repay the girl he left behind in the Fire Nation. It wasn't love, it was a debt. And however much he was reluctant to face Mai after everything, he knew more than anything that honor was important. Zuko never left a debt unpaid, and scorning Mai wasn't the easiest way to pay her back for saving his life.
Just a matter of honor, nothing more. It was strange how after everything, his mission and his life had revolved around honor.
--
Prince Zuko,
It's wonderful to hear that you have succeeded in your endeavors. The Fire Lord is pleased with your work, and wishes you luck on your journey to Ba Sing Se.
And as for me? I wish you luck as well. Just the thought of you miles and miles away is enough to keep me occupied.
Whether or not you wish to interpret that as pathetic longing or stubborn hatred is up to you, Zuko.
Mai
It had been a day since Sokka had set foot in the Bei Fong estate as a royal.
The night before had merely been a precursor to the horrid events that would follow. Now, Sokka, in the guise of the Earth King's nephew, had to successfully pull off his regality at a ball full of prestigious Earth Kingdom nobles. When you put it that way, it was hard not to feel a shudder of uncertainty. It was hard to do that with fancy robes weighing you down, though.
Toph had been forced to talk to a bunch of nobles yesterday. Sokka could hardly imagine how tortured she must have felt, but he couldn't help hiding a smile when thinking about the Blind Bandit in layers of silk and makeup, trying not to chuck rocks at the throngs of suitors trying to win her hand. The last he'd seen of her had been at breakfast that morning. As the most prominent man present, he had been forced into the seat directly across from Toph herself. She made faces at the other men over a bowl of porridge, elicting chuckles that Sokka had to stop from making audible by shoving grains of rice into his mouth as eloquently as possible.
The floor was stained with crimson. Crimson, like Fire Nation uniforms; crimson, like flames; crimson, like spilled blood. She ran, though, ran past all the crimson and blues and greens of the ones that had fallen. She didn't care, didn't pause to heal or look, but kept on going, willing her feet to fly.
There was only one thought on her mind. Aang. Aang, Aang, Aang.
She ran into the throne room, her eyes scanning the mess of flame searing the air. It was scorching hot, like a furnace, and she had to keep herself from averting her eyes as the flames exploded into walls of fire and burned white in the red of the room. She lashed out at a soldier nearby and tried to extinguish as much of the flames as she could. All the while, she kept on looking for a small, lithe figure amidst the fire.
She could hear cries and shouts and yells. She could feel the earth shake and the air heated with fire that burned as searingly as the sun. She was being burned alive, but she didn't care. Burns could be healed. Death was irreversible. And Aang's death was something that couldn't ever happen, couldn't ever happen...
She took a deep breath. As long as the flames still flew, the battle still raged, and Aang was still alive. She calmed herself down and fought the barrage of soldiers that surrounded her. Meanwhile, she heard the footsteps of allies and enemies rushing into the throne room, still fighting for their lives and for the lives of others, but kept on destroying for the Avatar and Fire Lord that fought in the flames.
Fire Nation soldiers surrounded her, and she drew the liquid out of her waterskin, forming a protective barrier separating her and the soldiers flanking her. She assumed the octopus form, lashing out in every direction, and it was not until they all fell that she saw the soft flutter of fabric as Aang landed next to her, landing like a bird on his toes, ever-so-lightly next to her.
"Aang, you-"
"Watch out!" A blast of flames grazed her side as he thrust his wooden staff out and barely managed to counter the attack of the Firebenders approaching. He shot a small, shaky smile at her before looking back at the soldiers that had spotted the Avatar and his Waterbending master in the middle of the throne room.
"Get out of here, Aang. You can't afford to lose your energy."
"It's alright, as long as the Fire Lord can't see me-"
A blast of flame was quickly dodged by the flighty Airbender, and it wasn't long until a barrage of fire followed the first. He glanced at her with a determined look and leapt away into the scalding furnace of heat.
"Toph! You-"
"Shush up!" She pushed him into a corner and bit her lip. "If anyone sees us here, I'm dead."
"I thought the whole point was to get them to think we were going to get married."
"Yeah, but not now!"
Sokka glanced around the corner and surveyed the empty hall. He sighed and turned back to Toph. "There's nobody in the hallways. What's been going on?"
"Tons of stupid stuff." She huffed a little. "I'm just glad to be free of all that makeup. I felt like a doll."
"So you're gonna have to get dressed again for the ball this evening?"
"Yeah. Wish I didn't have to, but that's the way things are." She shook her head in mock self-pity, then leaned against the wall in a very unladylike fashion. "You know, now that we've gotten so far into the plan, I kinda forgot what we're gonna do afterwards."
"I thought we were going to take Appa and fly off somewhere."
"Yeah, but where? We've got to get away from this place as fast as we can."
"I always thought that we were going to meet up with Katara and Aang at the North Pole."
"Oh, great. I won't be able to see with all that ice to walk on."
"No problem. We can carry you around or something."
A long, awkward silence ensued, and Toph took a deep breath.
"Okay..."
The warrior dismissed it with a sigh. "Alright, alright, let's just figure it out later. Right now, we need to focus on making sure no one gets suspicious. I've already had some of the maids eyeing me."
"You get maids, and I get nobles trying to kiss up to my parents."
"At least you don't need to wear a disguise!"
"At least you don't need to wear a dress."
"Look, both of us have got a lot to deal with, but we've got to remember that one mistake will cost us the whole thing."
"Isn't that the truth. I mean, look who's talking."
He tried not to make his annoyance evident as he replied. "Alright, so what're we going to do at the ball? Make a scene? Upset some nobles?"
Toph pursed her lips. "Actually, I think I'm gonna have to dance with you."
"What?"
"Dancing. It's like walking, but like an idiot. You know, spinning in circles and stepping on feet and everything." Toph spun her finger around to demonstrate, which irked Sokka even more. It wasn't as if he hadn't expected to dance with Toph at the ball, it was just that it hadn't really been outwardly expressed by either of them. It was a bit awkward, but hey, better now than later.
"I know, it's just that I... never mind."
"You don't know how to ball dance, huh?"
He rolled his eyes. "When in my life have I ever expected to attend a ball?"
"Uh... a few days, weeks, months ago?"
"Whatever. So I'll just follow whatever you're doing and try to act dignified."
"Close enough. Although I'm blind, you know. You've gotta look like you're steering this helpless little girl around. Which is totally the opposite of what we're gonna do, but sure."
"And does this mean that you have to dance with the rest of the suitors?"
"Definitely, and there'll be a lot of crushed toes by the end of the ball. After all, I am blind." Toph smirked and cracked her fingers, causing the warrior next to her to smile. He missed seeing this side of Toph, and it was nice that by the end of all this, she would go back to being the way she was before. It gave him a little more motivation.
"So. See you after you get all dressed up?"
"Yeah. See you at the ball." She grinned and walked away, causing Sokka to sigh and lean against the wall. He was tired, and a night of dancing would just complicate things for him. But this was for Toph... Toph, the toughest Earthbender and one of the greatest friends he had ever made. And he wouldn't let her down.
--
The ball would take place outdoors, with the dancing taking place at the courtyard and everything else spilling into the garden. Apparently, there had been a change of plans (something about the ballroom being too small to accomodate the plethora of guests that had arrived) and contrary to Toph's statement, the ball was to be held outside. The decor was still up, and it was large enough for all the guests.
Sokka didn't mind. It was going to be easy to lose himself in the rustle of colorful fabrics and the huge shrubs and trees that sprouted over the garden. Besides, it would give Toph lots of Earthbending material if she had to get away from an annoying suitor.
He attached the fake moustache on, practiced a few smiles, and whisked his cape on with a grin. It felt good to be a fake royal. It was good to be a conspirator in the escape of Toph Bei Fong. And pretty soon, it would feel good to be flying away as Sokka.
He left his room and locked the door, trying to walk down the hallway without making eye contact with any of the other guests. No apparent suspicions had arisen in them, but it was better safe than sorry. Sokka bit his lip slightly as he wondered how he would go through the ball just walking around and trying to ignore everybody but Toph. He had to make small talk sometime, and there was no doubt in his mind that some prominent person from a nearby region would eventually come up to him and force him to say something.
One of the many things Mai hated was being wrong. And she had been proven wrong, it seemed, for the hundredth time that day when the rebel hideout turned out to be... formidable.
At first glance, there were those wretched, spoiled teenagers. But then, there were those large weaponry rooms. And then, there were rooms full of conspiring noblemen and hallways full of assasins and corridors with hidden secrets locked behind doors.
All the while, she kept telling herself that Iroh could take anything. Even Zuko could take all these stupid rebels and their attempts to overthrow the throne. These people wanted the war, wanted Azula on the throne, wanted Iroh and Zuko dead. They still considered Zuko to be a traitor, somebody who deserved to be exiled. And Mai found herself wanting to whip a knife out and aim for the head of the teenage noble who kept trying to flirt with Ty Lee.
This was the most stupid, cliche place she had ever seen. And yet, she couldn't deny that a gathering of some of the Fire Nation's once-powerful noblemen and their families could be dangerous. A threat.
"And we have different places just like this all over the Fire Nation. Some members we send out to the other nations as well."
"But I thought the Earth Kingdom was already back under the Earth King's control?"
"There are a select few who'd like to regain power. You recall Long Feng, former head of the Dai Li?"
"Well... yeah. But Azula took care of him, right?"
"Correct, but now that the Fire Nation's no longer considered a threat, he's been set free. He's one of the most hated men in Ba Sing Se... a perfect candidate for helping us with our rebellion."
"So what exactly are you doing?"
"Uh..."
"Yeah. What's the point of gathering all these men here to do nothing but talk?" Mai contributed in the middle of Ty Lee and the young man's conversation. Ty Lee shot her a half-worried glance, and the teenager eyed her carefully.
"It's really under wraps. Join the rebellion. We'll tell you."
Just as Mai was about to decline and walk out in exasperation, Ty Lee broke in with a cheerful "We'll think about it!" and caught the edge of Mai's sleeve to keep her from walking away. The knife thrower brushed Ty Lee's hand away, but the pink-clad girl shot a small smile at her and mumbled, "After all, it's the only way to get Azula outta prison. And besides, you won't be bored anymore."
The older girl said nothing, just watched as Ty Lee and the young man exchanged some pieces of cryptic (but likely trivial) information and he went on his way again, a smile plastered onto his face as the acrobat waved a goodbye.
As he wandered out of hearing range, Mai scowled and muttered a "Let's get out of here," to which Ty Lee shrugged and led her to the door.
--
They were out on the streets again, and Mai was free to shout. Except she wasn't quite in the mood for shouting.
An argument would have to do, then.
"That hideout was the most idiotic place I've ever accompanied you to."
"Well, it was Azula's orders! Besides, I can't help it if those boys like me."
"I didn't mean the boys. I meant their stupid plan. Do you know anything about it?"
"Well, no, but if we join them, I guess we could find out!"
"That's exactly it. They're just sitting around spewing elaborate lies. Those noblemen in the back are probably drunkards."
"But if Azula knew about it, wouldn't it be at least sorta useful?"
"Azula's in prison. She doesn't know anything."
There was an uneasy silence, one Ty Lee broke by stating,
"Azula's never wrong."
"That was when she could find out anything she wanted to."
"So?"
"So she's in prison. Anything she hears down there is unreliable."
Ty Lee sighed. "Alright, alright. At least we went. It's still Azula's decision, after all."
They walked in silence. The light in the sky was dimming.
"Oh, yeah. Mai?"
"What now?"
"There's still time to go to that robe store, if you want."
"You were gone. I couldn't see you; the flames were everywhere. I knew you were okay, because the fighting was still going on. And I knew you would be alright.
"It wasn't until I saw you near Ozai's throne that I started to get worried. I didn't think you'd have gotten hurt if you fought from a long range, but you were just right there, right in front of him. And I was scared, Aang.
"I didn't know how your battle was going. Azula intercepted me just as I was about to get to you. Zuko was there, too. I guess he had fought his way through the Firebenders at the entrance and had decided to face his sister once and for all. To tell you the truth, Aang, he helped me. I didn't want to acknowledge it, but he was right alongside me. I thought it would be alright to leave him with Azula.
"And I was wrong. She blocked the throne completely."
"I remember, Katara."
"You were just up ahead, too. I wanted to help."
"It was so hard to watch you face Azula. But I had to let you go."
"I know. And I hate myself for being the reason why you couldn't have beat him sooner."
There was a quiet silence, and he then spoke, quietly:
"Maybe it would've been better if you hadn't been there. You could've gotten hurt. You could've... I could've..."
I could've given you up. I could've gone into the Avatar State. I could've been alright.
She gazed at him for a moment. The weight of the war had forced him into bandages and scarred him. The weight of disappointment had shattered his spirit and quelled his desire to live. He was just breathing for the sake of breathing.
She realized that he didn't really care anymore. It didn't matter to him whether he lived or not, and she... she had been one of the reasons for that.
"I don't know." She sighed then, taking his hand in hers. "I... honestly don't know. I just know that it was worth it, in the end. Everything."
"No. Just because the war's over, that doesn't mean everything is."
He glanced up at her, and she turned away for a moment, trying to think.
She had hurt him, in more ways than one. She had been so overprotective of him at the start that her pride got in the way of his health. And when he had needed her most, she had turned to Zuko, turned to him and given up on what she thought was a dead boy.
But Aang was very well alive. And he was suffering, for what he had done for the world. For her.
"No... not everything's over. But then again, not everything's bad."
She looked back at him and offered him a small smile. A soft, genuine smile. It wasn't the most reassuring, but it was the most real one she had attempted since Aang had woken up. It seemed to bring him comfort, and a quiet sigh escaped the young Airbender's lips before he asked, quietly:
"You're going to help me, right? Before it all ends?"
"It won't end for you, Aang." She squeezed the tattooed hand gently, the cold of his hands warmed by the heat of her gloved fingers. "I promise. I... I'll help. Everyone owes you this, you know."
"So you're doing this because it's a debt." He held onto her fingers quietly, his numb fingers entwined with hers. "It's something you have to do to repay me."
"Aang, I'm not doing this for you just because you saved the world. I want to help you because... I don't want you to lose hope, either." She let go of his hand, then, and he settled back onto his bed, wincing in pain as his back wounds made contact with the bedsheets.
"I don't know. I don't even know if it's worth it." Aang leaned against the pillow, eyes half-lidded. "My destiny was to save the world, but it's all over. The world doesn't need me anymore."
"We do need you. And even if the world doesn't anymore, I know that I do." She laid a hand on his shoulder, then stood up and walked to the door. "Get some sleep. I'll be back tomorrow morning, alright?"
"Okay. 'Night, Katara."
The Waterbender smiled as she left the tent. The spring breeze scattered the snow that lay like powder across the ground.
--
Some part of me dreams and prays that Aang will be alright. Some part has already lost hope. I'm not sure which to trust.
I keep telling myself that he's in the best of care. That spirit water, herbs, and healers have done so much for him already. They brought him awake, brought him back to life. And yet, a simple boy, even the Avatar, can't live, can't fight the onrush of death, with only the hope that the medicine will keep him alive.
I just don't want to get hurt. Never again. I told myself, back when Zuko was here for me to lean on, that it was best to treat Aang like he was already gone. To hide those feelings so that I wouldn't get hurt when it was all over. I gave up then, because of my own selfishness. I didn't want to be crushed, didn't want to feel the pain of loss so strongly again. I thought Aang had no hope.
I realize, now, that Aang had given up when I did. He had lost the will to live when I treated him like he was already gone. And in trying to protect myself from Aang's inevitable death, I blinded myself from the fact that he had a fighting chance... that he was alive.
It hurt him so much. It must have hurt him even more when Zuko, an... enemy to him... had more faith in Aang than I did.
I just want to help him. I want to give him that hope now. I know that he has a chance, and I know that he can live. If only he has the will to.
But... I can't love him, despite that fact. I just can't. It's what hurts the most, that attachment. If he were to leave me, if everything were to leave... I would be heartbroken. I can't stand that, can't take the loss. And though I know... I know it's what Aang needs, what he needs to know most of all- it's the one emotion that I need to hide no matter what. I can't do it, can't love the boy I'm trying to protect. Because I need to protect myself, too.
Yet... if he were to know, I think it would make him want to live again. Just knowing that I love him... it would be enough. I can't. I can't hurt myself or hurt Aang. It'll just end up as a regret in the end.
How can you crush someone you can't help but love?
How can you love someone when you have no choice but to crush them?
--
Katara,
Has Aang made any progress? I'm nearly at Ba Sing Se, so I want to make sure. If you need any assistance, you can always ask.
Zuko
The sun was setting, and most of the guests were filing out of the estate and into the courtyard, where the dancing would take place. The lanterns strewn around the garden had been lit, and fireflies circled the quiet yard. The ball would start in a matter of minutes, but for now, it was just the suitors and their chaperones. Sokka hadn't seen Toph yet, so he assumed that she would arrive when the festivities began.
"Hey, I haven't seen you around before. What province do you live in?"
Sokka froze at the sound. One of the suitors had walked up to him, and was apparently trying to start a conversation. Unfortunately, there was no escape, and the "Earth King's nephew" was forced to make a reply as the young man, who was so heavily lauded with gold jewelry that it was a surprise that his skinny legs could hold him up, approached him with a grin.
"Oh, um... I live in Ba Sing Se. Big city, you know?" He managed, smiling awkwardly.
"Hm, tell me about it." The suitor surveyed the garden thoughtfully. "Nice yard they've got here. It doesn't hold a candle to the one at my estate, though."
"Oh, really?"
"Yeah. We've got a whole garden full of panda lilies. The fountains are made of gold." The suitor grinned smugly. "What's it like at Ba Sing Se? Any different in the big city?"
"Well, ever since the Fire Nation lay siege to it, I haven't really gone out. It's dangerous to even be in your own garden, y'know? Firebenders and all."
"They aren't so bad. I once sunk a whole shipload of Fire Nation troops." He cracked his knuckles, and Sokka found himself grimacing at both the suitor's foolish pride and the way he was trying to display his strength.
"That's nice. Brave." How long was this going to go on? "Uh, what are your thoughts on Miss Bei Fong? A real catch, isn't she?"
"Look, I'm just in it for the fortune." The suitor leaned against the wall, a scowl on his face. "The Bei Fongs are one of the richest families in the Earth Kingdom. Their only daughter will inherit their fortune and the rest of their estate, and she's blind. See, if I were to marry her, it would be too easy to take that fortune. She's not in any position to stop me. She can't even see!"
"So you're in it for the perks, right?" Sokka felt a tide of anger swell up inwardly, remembering Yue and how it had been the same for her. "From what I've heard, though, To- I mean, Miss Bei Fong- she's a real lady. Charming, witty-"
"She's weak. She can't do anything without those maids of hers." The suitor rolled his eyes. "She'll be a real pain to have as a wife, but hey, once I get that fortune, I'll be able to ship her off somewhere. She won't even know."
"How do you know that? Have you even tried to talk to her?"
"Once, but someone pushed me into the pond before I could get a chance. It was weird, because nobody was around except for her. She was a few feet away, though, so she couldn't have done it herself." He raised an eyebrow thoughtfully. "Unless she's an Earthbender, but even I know that weak girls like her can't bend worth a copper piece. I probably just tripped."
Nice one, Toph. Score one for the Blind Bandit.
The suitor stood up straight, then, and Sokka sighed inwardly in relief, knowing that the conversation was about to come to a close.
"I'm Gaishi, by the way. See you around?"
"Yeah... yeah, sure." Sokka half-heartedly waved him away, then sighed and leaned against the wall himself. The string musicians had already set themselves up in the middle of the courtyard, and like Toph had said, a traveling circus had arrived and was warming up by the gates. The tables had been set up outdoors, and dinner was probably going to be served soon. Despite everything, maybe the ball itself wouldn't be too bad.
As soon as he made his way over to a snack table, though, everything- everyone- went silent. The shuffling of footsteps and murmuring ceased as Toph Bei Fong and her parents made their way out of the estate.
Toph looked like she was being suffocated. Her dress was the white silk one he had helped her buy that day, except that the Bei Fong family crest, a flying boar, had been sewn with gold silk onto the skirt. She looked the part of a lady.
She looked like everything she had never wanted to be.
In the Next Chapter: Toph crushes some toes, breaks some hearts, and teaches Sokka how to dance. Meanwhile, Katara, having come to terms with her relationship with Aang, is determined to help him get well again and uses some innovative techniques. Zuko writes letters to his uncle and Mai, all the while nearing Earth Kingdom territory. Mai is once again forced to accompany Ty Lee on another unpleasant order from Azula... and what is her plan, anyway?
And I'm sorry for not updating sooner. You see, I've run into a mess here. With the finale aired and everything set into place, a lot of critical plot elements I had wanted to incorporate were out of the question. Also, I had come down with a case of writer's block, and had all but lost my motivation after Avatar ended. However, I thank all of you who have set me back on track, especially Davis 51, who has helped so much with critiquing the story and gave me so much help. Thanks for your ideas, reviews, and support, everybody!