Usual disclaimer: I don't own Bleach.
……………………………………………………………………………………………….
Chapter Two
Rules
Ichigo sighed and ran a hand through his hair. He was sitting backstage, waiting for all the shinigamis to file in. Though he didn't actually consider it 'backstage', it was simply the area behind the wooden platform that served as a makeshift stage.
Finally, Ishida poked his head past the partition at the back of the platform.
"Oi, Kurosaki. They're all here."
"Whatever."
Ichigo grabbed the sheets of paper in front of him. He still didn't see the need for a script, but Ishida had insisted, and had chucked it into his face just before they had left for Soul Society.
He walked to the center of the platform, and looked out at the mass of shinigamis. Then he blinked. Was that Urahara? What was he doing here? And…oh gawd, was that Yoruichi next to him?
No time for pondering, though. Everyone was staring at him. He cleared his throat and began.
"Okay, everyone, listen up! Seeing as you lot are getting bored with just doing paperwork, we have decided to organize some entertainment for you."
He paused, interrupted by the cheering that followed this statement.
"This entertainment comes in the form of a game show, called the Seireitei Game Show. Anybody can apply to be a contestant in this game show. The overall champion gets a prize. Want to know what it is?"
More cheers from the audience.
"The grand prize is…" Here Ichigo took a deep breath, then bellowed:
"An all-expenses-paid trip around the world for the winner plus one friend!"
At this statement, the crowd went wild.
After about 5 minutes, Ichigo had to wave his arms around to stop the buzzing that had arisen.
"However, places in the show are limited, as only 12 shinigamis can actually take part. Application forms can be obtained from the tenth division office. All applicants must then come for an interview two weeks from now. We will then choose the 12 most suitable applicants to take part."
"During the game, the contestants will be taken to an inn on the outskirts of Rukongai. They will stay there for the duration of the game, regardless of whether they have been eliminated or not. You are strongly advised to wear human clothes instead of your shihakushous. This is to help facilitate movement during the challenges. You will also not be allowed any alcohol of any sort. In fact, you will only get 3 basic meals a day of rice, bonito, pickles, and water."
"You will be sorted into two groups. Challenges will be done in the groups. The winning team gets a reward, while the losing team is punished. Challenges will be held every two days, as the day after the challenge will be for the respective punishments and rewards. In addition, the losing team will choose two people for the elimination round. These two will battle it out to decide who leaves the show. However, when there are only 4 contestants left, there will no longer be a need for groups, thus the contestants will go solo. When there are 3 contestants left, we will hold a final challenge to decide the winner."
"The rest of you shinigamis will get to watch the challenges live. The soutaichou has very kindly given us an arena in the middle of Seireitei, near Sokyoku Hill. That is where we will hold the challenges, and where you can watch the show. The tickets to watch the show will be sold two days before the challenge, and one ticket allows you to watch one challenge. They can be purchased from the fifth division fukutaichou. Complete sets of tickets can also be bought."
"For applicants, please list down your full name, rank, any necessary medication, etcetera. Forms are to be submitted either to me or to the weird Quincy guy over there. Interviews will be held in tenth division meeting rooms, courtesy of the taichou and fukutaichou of that division."
At this point, Hitsugaya scowled. He hadn't given Kurosaki permission to use the meeting rooms. Matsumoto had tried to persuade him with her 'assets', but failed, instead suffocating him and thus causing him to pass out. When he came to, Matsumoto had already given Kurosaki the green light, and there was nothing he could do about it.
Ichigo stepped down from the stage, and excited shinigamis began to chatter happily about the game show, and move off.
……………………………………………………………………………………………….
It was two days after the interviews. Ichigo and Ishida were sprawled in a small apartment that they had rented, looking through the application forms. Each had come up with about 10 contestants each, and they were currently debating over the final 12.
Ichigo peered at the form on top of Ishida's stack.
"Urahara is actually joining the show?!"
"Yes, Kurosaki. He is actually quite a good candidate, you know."
Ichigo sighed. He leafed through Ishida's stack briefly.
"Well, that Kira Izuru is a definite no-no. He'll just make everyone depressed."
"Then I suggest that the ni-bantai-fukutaichou Marechiyo Oomaeda be excluded as well. I've seen his eating habits, and believe me, he will gross everyone out."
Ichigo grunted a possible affirmative, and Ishida extracted a rice-cracker-crumb-encrusted form and put it on the 'rejected' pile, on top of Kira's.
After another hour or so of bickering, they finally came up with 12 people.
"Now we need group names."
"Yup."
"What about Shiny Needles and Sewing Thread?"
Ichigo choked.
"No way, you sewing-obsessed freak. Let's stick to the original names of the Yellow Penguins and the Green Monkeys."
Ishida huffed, obviously miffed by Ichigo's 'sewing-obsessed freak' comment. He was saved from making a sharp retort by the arrival of Orihime and Chad.
"Good morning, Kurosaki-kun!"
She was carrying a crumpled piece of paper with a few holes in it, probably made by erasing the same spot multiple times.
"Here's the list of possible challenges!"
Ichigo stared at it. His mouth went dry.
"A-are you sure about this?"
Ishida moved over to look at it too.
"Inoue-san, I appreciate your ideas and all, but that one might just kill them."
…..…………………………………………………………………………………………...
Next chapter: the 12 contestants are revealed!
Please review!