Ginny POV

Chapter 8

One Year Later

"Alright, make sure you take this potion once every hour tonight and you'll be home this time tomorrow," I used my calming voice on the young witch, lying on the bed in the emergency wing of St. Mungo's. She nodded at me and I slid from the room. It was five and I was leaving as soon as I could.

"Healer Weasley!"

I turned slowly to face the head healer, Janet.

"Yes?"

"Just so you remember, when you get back a week from Monday, we start training the new healers."

I nodded and she looked at me with pity on her face.

"Have a good week off," she hugged me suddenly and firmly.

To say I was surprised would have been an understatement. The woman was not known for her sympathetic or caring nature. She was a large, statuesque woman, demanding respect from everyone she met.

"Uh, I'll be fine," I replied breathlessly, her grip around me was tight, cutting off my breathing. "I'm just taking a much needed vacation."

She released me and peered at me knowingly. I had the distinct feeling that this woman could see my façade slowly crumbling.

"If you need anything this week, you let me know," she stated firmly.

I just nodded at her, turned and walked down the hallway. This wasn't exactly the place I was planning on allowing my emotions to catch up with me. I grabbed my things form the locker room and flooed home; the entire time, willing myself to keep it together. I arrived at my flat a few moments later.

I moved out on my own as soon as I was done with school. For a while, I lived with George in the flat over his shop in Diagon Ally. George soon built himself a large home, not far away from Mum and Dad. I had been living on my own since, and I loved the privacy.

George was seated in the large armchair near the fireplace.

"Miss your old place?" I asked as I dusted of my robes and stepped into the room.

"Nah," he replied staring at his hands, "My house is so much bigger and comfier!"

I could immediately tell that George wasn't here because he missed me.

"Mum sent you," I accused wearily, "Didn't she?"

He looked up at me with a sly smile. "Yes, but we're not doing exactly what she had in mind. Get changed. We're going into Muggle London for a drink," he winked mischievously, "Or ten."

I smirked at him and walked back towards my bedroom to change. I had to admit, this would be more fun than what I had planned. I was going to; starting tonight, spend the entire week in bed; finally letting my depression take me. It had been a year since he left. Perhaps if I let George take me out tonight, and don't fall apart, they might let me alone for the rest of the week.

I walked into my closet and saw an outfit floating in it.

"I took the liberty of buying you a new dress for tonight," George yelled from the living room.

I rolled my eyes at my rather eccentric brother and slipped into the slinky black dress.

By midnight, and our fifth muggle bar, I was very glad that I wasn't a sloppy drunk.

"You are so much more fun to drink with than Ronnie or Charlie!" George yelled across the dance floor, causing the female he was dancing with to frown at him. "Don't worry baby, she's my sister." He slurred the last few words and begun to pull her across the floor to a dark corner where they began snogging.

As the song changed, I turned to face the attractive man I had been dancing with.

"Thanks," I whispered and pecked him on the cheek.

Quickly, I headed for the ladies room. While washing my hands, I heard two drunken girls babbling at each other from different stalls.

"Did you see that blond?!?" one asked excitedly.

"Yeah, but his messy dark haired friend was so much more attractive," the other replied quickly.

"That's just because you like the brooding kind," the first shot back.

I grasped the edge of the sink, willing my knees to stay locked so I wouldn't collapse on the floor of the ladies room. It wasn't possible. HE couldn't be here. I just was drunk and jumping to conclusions. I looked up in the mirror and stared at myself; the mask that I held so carefully in place was completely gone. There was a crazed look in my eyes and there were tears building. I knew I had to get home soon, before the dam burst.

"Come on," one of the drunk girls grabbed the others hand and pulled her around me, looking at me warily. "Let's go find those tasty guys."

I spun around and ran out the door, knocking the two girls out of the way. I turned wildly, trying to remember where the exit to this bar was. I could feel a cool breeze and ran towards it source.

Once outside, I ran towards a darkened ally and spun on the spot, the familiar pull as I apparated back to my apartment. Without thinking much, I began casting protective spells and charms around my apartment. I was going to blow soon and I did not anyone to witness it.

After exhausting my knowledge, I slumped to the floor of my entryway. I let go, and let myself remember those things that I had blocked for the past year.

I had closed up after that first week. I convinced myself that it was better to avoid grieving for and thinking of Harry.

Harry.

That name, that one simple name tore me right in half. A red-hot searing pain ripped right through me. I had blocked all emotion for so long, numbed myself really. This fresh pain had me writhing on the floor.

Harry left me, he was gone. He would never, ever be coming back. It had been one year and he made no contact.

I didn't fall asleep, but I lay on the floor until morning. The sun rose and its rays flooded into my apartment with a vengeance. Groaning, it felt like my entire body was covered in bruises, I rose from the floor and grabbed for the shades. I stopped for a moment to peer outside. The first thing I noticed was the sun. It was a bright, shining day; completely opposite from one year ago. The second thing I noticed was a slumped red-headed figure lying in a pile outside my door.

George, Damn.

I had hoped that he would have gone home last night, or be otherwise occupied. Suddenly, I saw two others join George on my doorstep. Ron and Hermione had arrived. Oh Joy.

Ron looked over and we made eye contact before I could quickly duck out of the way. My brain wasn't really functioning. Lack of sleep and depression left it foggy and sluggish.

"Oye!" I heard Ron yell from my seat on the floor in front of the door. "She's in there! I saw her in the window!"

I groaned, knowing they wouldn't leave now.

"Ginny?" Hermione called. "Could you let us in? George needs to use the restroom."

I stood up slowly, willing my aching body to obey me. Picking up my wand off of the floor, I removed the charms and spells that obviously hadn't done much good, and I opened the door.

"Merlin!" Ron exclaimed, looking me over. "You look like hell!"

"Thanks Ron," I murmured, walking towards the kitchen. I needed coffee. On the way, I caught my reflection in the large mirror in the hallway. I still had the slinky black dress on, but it was wrinkled and there was lint all over it, probably from the floor. My hair had gone every which way and my eye make-up was everywhere but my eyes. Most of it was in two black streaks down my face and neck. My eyes were blood shot and completely puffy, and I actually had creases on my face form the floor tile in the entryway. Yes, I suppose I did look like hell, but I couldn't bring myself to care.

Hermione had given up reviving George and was levitating him to the couch in the living room. She entered the kitchen not long after.

"Let me do that," she said softly as she took the coffee from my hands. I sighed and sat in one of the kitchen chairs, placing my head on the table. "Are you okay?" she asked as she placed four coffee cups on the counter. I glanced up at her with one eyebrow raised. "No, I suppose you're not. That was a dumb thing to say, but you have been doing so well lately. I suppose you don't want to think about it anymore, but it's been one year today and…" She continued blathering on but I had stopped listening when I saw something glittering on her left hand.

"HERMIONE!" I yelled, jumping out of my chair, effectively cutting off her ramblings.

"What?!" She asked startled.

I couldn't make my voice work, so I just pointed at the large, glittering ring on her finger. She looked at me carefully, awareness dawning in her eyes.

"Oh, Ron asked me to marry him last night," she said slowly.

I forced a smile to my face, "That's wonderful!" I yelled, trying to at least sound happy, if not excited.

"Stop screaming," George mumbled as he shuffled into the kitchen rubbing at his eyes. "It hurts my ear."

Ron followed him and gave Hermione a slightly angered look.

"No, I'm fine!" I protested. "This is wonderful. How did it happen? How can I help?" I was genuinely happy for them and wanted to help, it was just really bad timing.

By the end of the day, Hermione had successfully planned most of her wedding, with my help. She and Ron took off at about six to tell Mum and Dad. George had left much earlier in the day to check-in on the store below us, and never came back.

I sat down in my living room, peering into the flames of my fireplace. It was lit so Ron and Hermione could leave. I wondered if I could actually do this, move on. I had successfully made it one year, and after that first week I hadn't broken down until today.

I padded to my bedroom. There was one thing I could do tonight that might help. I had watched a Muggle movie with Hermione a few weeks back, A Message in a Bottle, and it had given me an idea. I could write him a letter, send it to him. He would never get it, but I could finally tell him those things I hadn't before.

I sat down at my desk and pulled out a quill and piece of parchment.

Harry,

Merlin, that even hurt to write. That's not all your fault though, I did tell you to leave. I didn't think you would. It was so unlike you. I had thought you would want to stay around, you know, with me. I guess not. I just realized how dumb this letter is. I got the idea from a muggle movie. How daft is that? You'll never read it but, maybe it will help me.

I still love you, Harry. It doesn't matter that it has been an entire year and I haven't heard from you. I still do, which sucks really, because it seems you're not coming back. I wouldn't ever tell you this, but since you'll never read it, I will.

Last night I was at a bar here in London and these girls were talking about a blond guy and a brooding man with messy, dark hair. My mind went immediately to you and I had to leave. Isn't that sad? Just the thought of seeing a person who looks like you hurt. I came home after that and lay on the floor, letting the pain wash over me again.

But I feel better now. Helping Hermione and Ron plan their wedding was a great distraction.

I don't know if I'll ever write another letter. I guess we will just see how I feel when I send this off. If it helps, maybe I will.

Harry. I miss you. I love you. Come back to me.

Gin

I rolled up the letter and set it on my desk. I had no owl, so it was kind of pointless to even write the letter, but I did feel a bit better.

I glanced up and peered out the window into the dark. It was much later than I thought. I was exhausted. The coffee I had been drinking all day was wearing off, and the sleepless night was catching up with me. I slumped forward in my chair and placed my head on the desk.

I might have fallen asleep, but the next thing I knew was a pecking sound at my window. I opened it up and let Pigwigion into my room. The small owl hadn't learned much, it still fluttered around spastically. I grabbed him on the third try and pulled the small note off his leg. Before I could think much about it, I secured my letter to his leg.

"Find Harry," I whispered, as I shoved the owl out the window.

A/N So many of you asked, or just told me that Ginny should be pregnant. And no. She wasn't, obviously. Sorry to disappoint, but I do have a plan for the rest of this story... ;-) and next week is finals for me, so I'm tyring to get a few chapters done this week, so that there wont be a break. But no promises.

-Sarah

P.S. EK, thanks for the run-on fixing. Yes, I am an English major, but I suck at grammar. :-p You know that!