Edward.

Are they themselves to blame
The misery, the pain?
Didn't we let go?
Allowed it,let it grow
If we can't restrain
The beast which dwells inside
It will find it`s way somehow, somewhere in time

Will we remember all of the suffering
`Cause if we fail it will be in vain

Our Solemn Hour- Within Temptation

We crossed the boarder an hour later and although Alice's vision informed us we were too late, we kept running. Id left my cell phone in my volvo after taking a bet with Emmett i could last a day without talking to Bella, im not sure how exactly he got me into that one, my temper was top suspect. What a stupid thing to have done. Esme was the only one with a phone but she kept getting voice mail.

"Carlisle,ring me back as soon as you can" she pleaded after the fifth ring

"Anything Alice?" Rosalie pressed

"If there had been anything i'd of told you by now Rose" Alice snapped.

My insides were writhering in anxiety as Alice searched ahead but only getting the same images, these were enough to let loose a pain so sevre Jasper had to grab my upper arm to keep me upright and pull me along, radiating soothing waves over me untill i got my head stright.

I couldnt even begin to comprehend the terror that i was drowning in. Not even when the volturi threatening the lives of our whole family and friends did i feel like this. What would we be returning home to? If Nessie weren't dead, No she wouldnt be dead. Emmett and Carlisle would be close by to prevent...something irreversable. What would this to my Bella? It would destroy her. She'd convince herself she shouldnt be near us, push us away. I knew Bella well enough to know she wouldnt get over doing something like this. We'd all comfort her,(rose flashed to my mind), most of us would. We'd explain it was behond her control, her natural instincts she'd denied got the better of her. But would that be a good enough explanation for her. I'd convince her, id make her see if it took me years. She trusted me, i wouldnt let her to hate herself. But after this, could we afford to have her near Nessie, have her watched all the time she was with her?. She'd amazed us all at her ability to resist so well but now, as jasper kept thinking, had she snapped?

"Esme try again" i ordered and pushed myself as fast as i could go. I got 10ft ahead of them all and it still didnt seem fast enough.

I heard esme try, and try, and try again. Nothing. What was happening?

Jasper tried to radiate a calm over all of us but couldnt concentrate properly with all of us moving and the other thoughts going through his head.

"should of seen this coming.."

I growled and im sure someone withing a five mile radius would of heard me but the torture kept coming..

"she cant be let near Nessie after this, i'll make sure of it, not allowed alone. no to risky. Please, please let Em have done something.."

"If i could only see.." a picture of Renessmee crying in pain " I cant keep looking at this...why cant i see!!!"

"Please let carlisle ring, i cant bear the thought of what were returning home too, what if Emmet and Carlisle were too late, what if they dont know already, my Nessie.."

I ran harder trying to escape their thoughts putting everything i had into pushing the earth behind me. The scary thing, excluding the situation at present, was knowing i was agreeing with some of their thoughts.

15 minutes later and we were nearly there. Familiar scents and surroundings passing us. Emmetts reached us first and then went further west.

"Should one of us go and see where it leads?" Esme shouted, she sounded as if she were choking

Before one of the others could reply his scent came in again, a fresher trail leading back to the house. I burst into a small clearing and was hit by 3 scents stopping me in my tracks,sending dirt flying others soon followed in, mimiciking me and taking in the strong scent of Carilsle, Bella and Renessmee and a faint one of Emmett.

"This is where it happend." Alice whispered.

Five pairs of eyes locked in on the the middle of the clearing where the grass had been disturbed.

"Why did Emmett leave?" Jaspers voice was confused as well as strained.

I was scarred to leave, to find out what was waiting back at home. What was the result of the disturbed grass a couple of hours ago.

Rosalie darted past me, the rest of us quickly followed and i over took them all.

This was no time to be a coward. My family needed me.