Edward
I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain
'Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away
Broken-Seether ft Amy Lee.

The last note left my lips softly as Nessie's breathing became slower. I pulled back Bella's old duvet and tucked it around my daughters tiny frame. I smoothed my thumbs lightly over the red,tender skin around her eyes, if only i could make that smudge of pain go away. A different kind of torture touched my silent heart when i watched her cry, I felt helpless, I felt lost, I felt guilty, I felt anguish, I felt fury, I felt afraid, I felt i'd failed.

I lived a 100 years alone, wondering (as i'd given up hoping) i'd find someone who completed what i was. Never did I think I'd have a child, that gift was lost to me, one of the many reasons i was reluctant to give Bella this life but I'd been given two things secred to me. Two things I'd hurt deeply, for not being able to protect and not being able to beleive, it was a wonder they still wanted me here, that it all wasn't hanging by a thread. It was foolish to think a few hours ago as i lay with Bella that things seemed better, seemed brighter, it was an illusion. Looking at my broken daughter enforced that loud and clear. Only when I heard Charlie's thoughts, at what he worried and suffered, did I let all my fears lose in my head to mull over.

My daughter was so precious, such a living miracle and the people that were meant to keep her safe and happy had hurt her the most. Although she had forgiven us, she couldnt forget. As much as she tried, as much as she grew frustrated with trying to let it go, she couldn't. Which made her more distressed because she was scared it would upset me and the others, she was selfless.

I explained everything I had to Bella, everyones actions, even my own. She understood ,she forgave me quicker than i deserved, her forgiveness was more than i deserved. She told me she was sorry she screamed and she was sorry she'd hurt me and began to weep her sincerity. It was diabolical she was apologising to me, like her mother she got it all backwards. She was frightened the rest of the family would be angry and i reasured her they weren't, just despereate to have her home and safe. There was more to her fears and it slipped through so i was able to read it, she wondered whether they'd realise that she was a mistake, that she shouldnt be alive. The thought infuriated me, it wasnt that Renessmee thought this of her family but that she was so distraught, she was letting her mind imagine wild things and was believing them. I couldnt beleive what i was witnessing, just four days ago we were all so happy and now it was hard to recognize the fragile little doll in front of me. Her hysteria, her pain and her thoughts scared me. How could one little girl cope with so much, she may be ingenious but she still was a little girl. She was my little girl, our little girl and I vowed with vengency, as if pain was a living being, it wouldnt hurt her like this ever again. Even if it killed me.

Her shoulder had started to burn distracting her and i'd fetched the morphine from were it sat on Bella's old desk in the corner of the room. I was momentarily greatful that it would help lull her to sleep, so her mind could rest, that she could escape from her pain for a while.

Below Charlie paced up and down his living room, thoughts torn whether or not to leave us or come and check, to ring Carlisle, to ring the hospital. Nessie's wails frightened him and he worried for her health,he perceived there was something we were hiding from him and he was battling to stand by his 'need to know' condition.

In a moment of calmness, centre of the eye of the storm, she told me about her nightmares. In a tiny voice threaded with cracks, she told me that she was high on her Jungle gym calling for her Momma, but Bella wouldnt come and look. She'd slide to the bottom as the sky grew darker as she got closer to the ground. The kitchen door was closed and for some reason she knew it was locked, she walked closer to the glass window which was blurred but became clearer as she got closer. It was our family arguing, Bella and Rosalie in the middle while Emmett and I stood on opposite sides of our wives. Taking a different side. She'd start to cry and scream for them to stop but then Rosalie would lunge for Bella and she couldnt look anymore. She looked away to the woods where a russet tail dissapeared into the green and she ran after it shouting for help. She said it became colder as she went deeper into the wood, and she'd catch a glimpse of red watching her but beleive she was imagining it. When she got to cold to go on she'd turn to come home, when a white hot poker sliced through her shoulder and she fell down,unable to open her eyes. She wanted to crawl, to get away but something held her down and when she was allowed to open her eyes, blood red ones gazed back at her and then she'd wake up.

She now dreamnt of being downstairs in the livingroom,in front of the fire and Charlie was telling her an old story to do with her wolf people. I sat on the sofa, Bella currled up into my side. She could hear Jake in the kitchen, thundering around cooking for us all. She was afraid of going outside and asked me to close the curtains, she whispered she'd seen the red eyes. I told her they wouldnt come near us because we had a guard dog, which made Bella laugh, a tinkiling sound and Jacob come into the room with a pile of food and packeted blood and Charlie asked what was so funny, going on with his story...

I watched her face as she dreamnt peacefully and thought of these eyes. I felt a little dissapointed that I couldnt rip them from their sockets, to hear the metalic screech as i ripped the fiend limb from limb for daring to even look at her, never mind feed from her. The sheets strained under my hands as they were captured by my fists, I fought for control, to beat down the murderous fury and focus on my daughters face. I'd seen through Emmetts memory the vampire he'd chased and wanted to question,trying to keep the same feeling of murdering at bay. The man was someone i'd never seen before, that I was sure of. His oynx black hair was cropped to his chin and his eyes were wild crimson as he snarled against a tree Emmett had him up against. He wouldnt answer any of Emmetts questions, wouldnt comply with any compromise Em promised, earning him to lose Emmetts temper and his head. His movements I monitord from Em's memory were obvious this vampire wasn't very experienced and maybe not very old. He went for the direct attack we'd learnt to avoid from Jasper nearly a year and half ago.

This part left me suspicious, if he were a new born, why hunt so close to where other immortal scents lay all around? Was he curious about how many of lived together and why? Did he have his own questions he needed answering? Was he so thirsty that he couldnt smell the difference in Renessmee's blood and his instinct over took him? None of these paid the littlest part of an excuse, then again I wouldnt except one.
There was something else, something i hadnt touched on but my fears skimmed over.....What if he'd been sent?
No,no, no. If he'd been sent Alice would of seen. She was prepared for any action made by the volturi, waiting for it as such. It was clear in their minds last year they wanted, if not planned revenge. 'For slipping past justice' as Caius' livid mind put it. His pride had taken a phonomenal blow, his beliefs burned with imaptience. He wanted us punished or rather needed us punished.

The last conclusion echoed through my head as i watched Nessie sleep. A small smile graced her pink shell lips, as her dreaming Jacob told her he'd never leave her. She was half of me and half of my Bella, she was something that I was destined to protect.

"Even if it kills me." I confirmed my vow quietly.