Author's Notes:

Timeline: This is set about 3 years after Endless Waltz. The boys are 19-20 and Heero, Duo, Trowa and Wufei have been in the Preventers since the end of that war.

Pairings: 1x2, 3x4, Wufei/Sally

Summary: A Preventer mission goes wrong and Heero is killed while the other pilots watch. Will the new emotional trauma destroy Duo's sanity completely or will he use it to become Commander Une's new perfect soldier.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything related to Gundam Wing.

WARNING! There is quite a bit of language in this chapter! You have been warned

Comments are love guys? Can I get some? Especially for this chapter? Enjoy!

"....The two of them are probably sitting in Sally's office right now discussing whether I've lost it or not." Duo murmured bitterly as he stretched one leg out and wrapped his hands around the bent knee of his other leg. "Can't say I blame them." The nineteen year old leaned against the metal wall behind him and glanced up at the cadaver storage unit that he sat beside. "I haven't even been able to go home yet Heero." He whispered softly. "I don't know what I'm going to do with all our stuff, its not like I'll need most of it when I head back to L2." Duo leaned forward and rested his forehead on his knee. "This isn't right you know, we were supposed to be happy. We had the rest of our damn lives ahead of us." His voice choked. "I lo...." The sound of the door being pushed open made him tense and he shot to his feet. His violet eyes widened in disbelief then narrowed in fury when he saw Relena Darlian standing in the door of the morgue. "Get out!" He hissed.

"Maxwell!" Relena had obliviously thought she would find the morgue empty and was surprised to see him. She covered her surprise quickly and crossed her arms over her chest. "What the hell are you doing here?" The two of them had never really been on good terms after the wars had been said and done but they had played at being friends for the sake of their public image. The fake peace between them had ended with Heero's decision to share an apartment with him rather then move in with her and the two of them had been at odds ever since.

"I told you to get out!" Duo snapped.

"No." Relena said nastily. "I have as much right to be here as you do." Duo couldn't hold back the bitter peal of laughter that rose in his throat. The sound seemed to unnerve Relena a little but she wasn't the Vice Foreign Minister for nothing and firmly held her ground.

"Like hell you do Darlian."

"I was Heero's friend too Duo."

"No you weren't." Duo's response was immediate and deadly serious. "You were an annoyance at best. He tolerated you because he had to."

"That's not true!" Relena growled. She knew what Heero had felt for her.

"Yes it is."

"How can you say something so horrible?" Her cry rang through the silent morgue and down the hallway.

"Because its true!" Duo didn't mean to scream back but his words had the desired effect of making the insistent girl be silent, at least for a moment.

"You should leave Maxwell." Her tone was lined with pure ice when she did regain her voice. "I want to say goodbye to Heero then meet with Lady Une so we can decide what needs to be done for his funeral and I don't want you around to screw things up."

"So you can decide?" Duo felt his body go cold and stiff as he stared at the young woman in disbelief. He felt absolutely numb in the wake of her words. A second bark of hollow laughter escaped his throat and his hands balled into fists at his sides. He wasn't going to let her just waltz in here and rip his responsibility away from him. "Lucky for Heero its not your decision to make." He muttered.

"What did you say?" Relena demanded

"I said that it's not up to you!" He was shouting again and he struggled to get his anger under control. He was momentarily hyper aware of the knife in his boot but stamped down hard on the urge to draw it. Killing her would net him nothing but more heartache. To stave off the urge he balled his hands into even tighter fists and he was so angry that it barely registered when his nails pierced the soft flesh of his palms.

"Then pray tell Maxwell. Who is it up to? You?" Her tone was heavy with mocking and she continued on without realizing that she had answered her own question. "You would probably just have him cremated then have the ashes spread in space."

"You're right, that's exactly what I'm going to do." An eerie kind of calm replaced his anger as he leaned over the exam table that separated them. He hung his head and felt his braid fall over his shoulder. "I think he would actually like that your Highness." Sarcasm dripped from his words as he looked at her again and when he smirked there was no hint of humor in it. Relena actually took a step back this time and he wondered if she had finally realized that she wasn't dealing with the same happy go lucky Shinigami he had been during the wars. A softer, darker chuckle rippled through him and he looked at her through his bangs with eyes that were little more then violet slits. "It sounds about perfect."

"You have got to be joking." Relena tried to laugh off his comments but it sounded fake to both of them. "Even if it was up to you, which I'm sure it isn't, cremation is no way to honor a man like Heero. He deserves a real funeral! The world and the colonies deserve a chance to mourn him!" Her voice had slowly risen with each word and she looked more then ready to continue.

"That is enough Miss Darlian." The girl jumped at Commander Une's sudden interruption and spun to find both Lady Une and Sally hovering behind her. "I expect better behavior from someone who acts as a representative of both the Earth Sphere and the Colonies."

"L... lady Une, Sally please... I can explain." Duo's gaze flitted between the three women as Relena tried to apologize and he pushed himself away from the exam table so he could lean on the wall behind him. He crossed her arms over his chest and lifted one foot to press the sole of his boot against the metal. His hand went to his collar and he gently tugged the necklace with Heero's ring from under his shirt. The metal was warm between his fingers and he shivered a little then let it fall back against his chest with a soft thump.

"I don't need an explanation Miss Darlian. We could hear you shouting from Sally's office." Relena's cheeks went from flushed to deathly pale in an instant as she realized exactly how big a a fool she had made of herself.

"Commander I apologize." She said stiffly. Her eyes watered and the young man wanted nothing more then to hit her for daring to cry over Heero in front of him. Lady Une seemed unfazed by how close she was to tears and Sally seemed to be as equally repulsed by them as he was. "It's just... it's just that I want Heero to have the kind of funeral he deserves."

"I am not letting her turn Heero's funeral into some goddamn political stunt Commander!" Duo hadn't intended to speak but the words spilled from his throat with a hint of desperation. He wanted something small, with just their closest friends and acquaintances. He didn't want to have to hide that they had been married anymore and he would have to if Relena got her hand in things. The revelation would overshadow everything Heero's funeral was supposed to be about. "You knew Heero! You know how much he hated that shit. He just wanted to be left alone!"

"I understand Duo." Lady Une gave him a sympathetic look then turned her hardened gaze on Relena. The girl seemed to realize that she was fighting a losing battle but pushed on with her argument anyway.

"Heero needs to have a real funeral Lady Une! He needs to be honored for all he did to make our peace a reality!" Lady Une was clearly not in the mood to take her words to heart.

"The arrangements for Heero's funeral will be made at Duo's discretion not yours. I'm sorry if his ideas are not what you had in mind."

"But why?" Relena cried. Her hands bundled into tight little fists at her sides and she turned to give the former Deathscythe pilot a scalding glare. "What gives him the right to make those choices?"

"Heero was my husband. That's why he quit working for you. He... he asked me to marry him and I said yes." Duo silently cursed himself for the way his voice quivered and he wiped at his eyes furiously. He was not going to cry in front of her. "There is no way in hell I'm letting you turn his funeral into a media circus. I don't want people there who didn't even know him."

"YOU'RE LYING!" Relena roared suddenly. She stalked across the room to stand in front of him and Duo saw her eyes widen a little when she saw Heero's ring hanging around his throat. It was obvious to Duo that she had seen it before but had never understood what it meant till now.

"You can ask Commander Une if you don't believe me. She officiated the ceremony for us."

"He would never marry a street whore like you! Never!" A hysterical edge had crept into her words and Duo froze in disbelief as she actually called him a whore to his face. Her fist was suddenly crashing towards him and Duo was so shocked by her accusation that he barely had time to turn his head enough to avoid the blow. The former Queen of the World's face twisted in shock as her hand collided with the metal wall behind him and she crumpled to the ground in tears as she cradled her broken fingers. "You bastard! You stole him from me you bastard! How could you? He would have loved me if it wasn't for you!" She whimpered miserably. Duo watched her cry in silence for a long moment then dropped down to her eye level and palmed his knife from his boot. The press of the blade against her throat made her still and she looked up at him with huge tear filled eyes.

"I never sold my body for anything!" He hissed softly. "Not even when I was starving." The blade slipped back into his boot easily and he stood gracefully. "L2 made me a damn good thief but even I can't steal something that never belonged to someone. Heero never loved you. The most he ever felt towards you was obligation. He knew that the longer you lived the more stable the peace would become and all he wanted was to not have to fight anymore so he could have the life he wanted with me." He was across the morgue in an instant and nodded silently to Lady Une and Sally as he passed them. "Thank you for interceding and taking my side Commander. I appreciate it."

"You're welcome Duo. She should never have gotten down here without an escort. I apologize." Duo nodded in acceptance of her words and turned his attention to Sally.

"Heero and I were both colony born. It seems appropriate to have him cremated. You can call my cell or the apartment when the arrangements are made. I want the funeral to be as small as possible, just like our wedding was. It is what Heero would want."

"I'll call you when the arrangements are made. If you would like I can also arrange a burial plot in the military cemetery where Treize was laid to rest? It won't be anything elaborate. " Duo thought the request over for a moment then nodded a little.

"That's probably right too." He admitted after a long pause. The idea of having an actual grave marker even if Heero wasn't buried there satisfied the last objections to cremation that had still resided in his mind. It was the little of both he had wanted but not known how to satisfy. "It'll give the others someplace to mourn too." He added softly.

"I'm sure Wufei and the others will appreciate that." Sally agreed. She glanced down at Relena who was still curled around her hand and sighed. "I should tend to her Duo, I'm sorry." Duo shrugged nonchalantly.

"It was her decision to try and hit me." He said coldly. "Go ahead and do what you need to do." He glanced back at Relena's crumpled form a final time then ghosted past Lady Une and headed down the hall. He wanted nothing more then to go home, even if going home meant he had to face an apartment that he no longer had to share and a reality that he was still trying to avoid.

//Don't forget you need to call Howard too Kid.// Duo silently agreed with the voice in his head and jogged down the hall towards the elevator.

SO... how did the chapter go over for everybody? Was it too much? Too little? Was Relena crazy enough for all of your tastes? Lemme know what you think. I appreciate it.

Chapter Preview: Duo goes back to his apartment and contacts Howard to let him know about Heero.