I stumble over to where Chandler and everyone else is sitting, falling on the chair beside him. He looks up and a look of concern comes across his face.

"Mon? Are you okay?" he asks.

"No, no, no," I stutter, getting closer to him. I suddenly feel very cold. My mind is racing. My dad is dead. My dad is dead. My dad is dead. I feel a panic attack coming on- I haven't had one of these in years.

"Monica, what's going on?" he asks again.

"No, no, no," I say again. I can't even help what's coming out of my mouth now. My dad is dead. My dad is dead. My dad is dead.

"Sweetie, what's the matter?" Rachel says, coming behind my chair and wrapping her arms around my neck, hugging me.

"My dad is dead, my dad is dead, my dad is dead!" I say quietly, rocking back and forth. My friends stare at me. I'm the calm one, I always have been. They're not used to this new Monica, who sobs and rocks back and forth like a mental patient. I try to quiet the huge sobs coming out of me as I lean against Chandler, enveloped in his arms. Ross comes over and sits next to me. With Chandler's nod, he takes me from him and hugs me, crying as well. Rachel and Chandler are nearby. Phoebe, Mike, Joey, and Alex are all looking at us, but I don't care. They're my friends. My dad is dead. They'll understand.

After a while, after Ross and I have quieted down, after all I am doing is wiping some stray tears off of my cheeks, Rachel and Chandler come over, hugging us. Phoebe, Mike, Alex and Joey come too. Phoebe sits down on the floor and hugs my leg, while Mike hugs my shoulder. Joey and Alex hug Ross and Rachel. Chandler kisses my forehead and strokes my hair. My dad may have died, but I still have all the family I could ask for.

--

At home, Chandler and I head to bed after putting the twins down. Jack falls asleep quickly in his crib. Erica stays awake longer, needing some shaky singing (on my part) to get her to sleep. Chandler wraps his arms around me and we walk down the hallway to our room. We climb into bed and sleep.

In the morning, Chandler is the one who wakes me up. I bat him away. "It's Saturday," I groan.

"We need to get ready for the funeral," he says gently. I groan more.

"Do I have to go?" I ask. His snort is my only answer. Slowly, I climb out of bed and take my shower. I weigh myself again.

"Chandler?" I say fearfully.

"What, Mon?" he says, appearing in the doorway, holding both Erica and Jack.

"I've gained another two pounds," I say upset. His eyes bulge out, and I can tell he's embarrassed about it.

"Well, go ask your doctor about it on Monday. You have an appointment then, right?"

"Yeah," I say, turning away. He follows me.

"Hey," he says, putting down Jack and Erica and putting a finger under my chin, pulling my face towards his, "you're still the most beautiful girl in the world."

I scoff and kiss his cheek before heading to get dressed, putting on my black dress from last night. I dress the babies- Erica in a yellow dress and Jack in a blue dress shirt and khaki pants. I know my dad would have wanted it that way. I put a barrette in Erica's hair and smooth down Jack's lumps before kissing them both on the top of their heads and sitting them down in front of Dora the Explorer in the living room.

I go back upstairs and tie Chandler's tie for him. He smiles and we hold hands as we walk downstairs and put the stroller in the car before grabbing the kids and fastening them in their carseats.

"You look handsome, yes you do!" Chandler says, strapping Jack into his carseat. When I turn to him and stare, he looks back. "It's things like that that make me seem gay, isn't it?" he says indignantly. I laugh.

"It's sweet," I say, patting Erica on the belly before climbing into the passenger seat. As Chandler starts the car, I tell him to hold on and run inside to grab a protein bar.

"I'm so damn hungry!" I say, stuffing half the bar in my mouth as I climb back into the car. Chandler just laughs and starts up the car. We drive to the church and take seats in the front row, next to Ross, Rachel, Emma, Matthew, and Mom. The preacher starts the service. I don't feel a thing. It's obvious he didn't know my dad. The tears start to fall, though, when Ross climbs the stairs and stands behind the pulpit.

Ross clears his throat. He speaks in a soft tone. "Hello everyone. Thanks for coming out here. I know a lot of people who came a long way to be with me and my family right now, so thank you so much. I'm sure my father would appreciate it.

"My father was an amazing man. He wasn't the usual definition of 'amazing'- he wasn't a medical genius or a mathematician or a writer of any sort. He was a regular man who worked a boring job and played golf on Tuesdays. No, his 'amazing' was something special- his 'amazing' was being himself. My father cared about his children and grandchildren to the extreme. When I was six, my dad started to teach me how to ride my bike. He made me wear a helmet, two layers of knee- and elbow-pads, and a foam padding under my hard helmet. He and I both thought I would be invincible. Even so, when I fell off the bike and skinned my ankle in a complicated twist, he lifted me onto his back and ran home. He applied a ton of anti-infection cream and put two Band-Aids on my ankle, and then we went out and tried bike riding again. He always taught me to persevere. He didn't even laugh when I told him I wanted to major in paleontology, not engineering, like I had planned. He paid for my college and was the first one I thanked when I got my Ph.D. I loved him so much, and I know he loved me and Monica as well. I will miss my father dearly, as he is the role model in which I follow. I can only hope that one day, I will be as good a father, husband, and brother as my father once was."

Ross steps off the podium and walks down the steps, wiping tears off his cheeks as he walks. I am sobbing by this point.

The preacher ends the service and we go to the cemetery, watching as they lower my father's casket into the ground. I bury my face in Chandler's shoulder and hug Erica closer to me. We stand there by the gravesite until it is just us, just my friends and my mother and our children. We stand there for several minutes, not speaking. Finally, it is Mom who speaks up.

"I could really go for a cup of coffee right now."

Chandler looks up and half-smiles. "Where?"