AN – I am so happy! Somebody finally figured out what I was doing with the chapter titles! Still, I'm sad only one person made the connection, and the worst part is, they were an anonymous reviewer, so I couldn't congratulate them.

A.n.y.w.a.y...

Esme figured out that I was punishing myself for driving the others away. Or at least, she was the first to mention it aloud. The others slowly put together the pieces after that. Alice was the first to take action. She called Jasper's cell phone almost immediately. I knew she didn't mean for me to hear. I had Edward's iPod blaring, but the earphones were on my shoulders. She probably thought I couldn't hear her. But I heard every word.

"Jazz? I miss you so much. What's he like?" there was a long pause.

"She's the same. She won't hunt though, punishing herself for making you two leave." A shorter pause.

"I know it's stupid. They both need to have their heads slammed together." She waited for a while, whilst Jasper spoke of something or another.

"Perhaps. Bring him home, would you? Use a guilt trip if you have to, but get him back here. She won't hunt until you're both safely home, I'm sure of it." There was a short pause.

"She seems happier to me. She's got her room set up and she seems content. We all watch movies together, my new favourite is Finding Nemo and we've had some fun dancing and just lounging around. She seems happy, but I'm not the expert. Both of them are currently in Alaska." A long pause this time. I was running my fingers along the wires of the earphones, subconsciously.

"Okay. See you then." She sounded much happier. "I love you. Bring the idiot home would you? Tell him that his CDs are all here, waiting to be played."

Then she hung up. I heard her coming upstairs to see me and quickly shoved the earphones into my ears. Soon enough there was a knock at my door.

"Yeah?"

"Do you want to come hunt with me?" I could say yes. They were coming home. Alice and Jasper would be reunited soon. I could say no, continue to torture myself for no reason. They were coming home. I had no reason to hurt myself anymore. No reason to torture myself. But if I were to keep up the charade of not hearing her phone call...

"No. Thank you though."

She sighed and left, going downstairs. What could I do for the next few hours? A bath. I didn't need one, I just wanted one. I filled up the gigantic tub with as many different bubbles as I could and sunk beneath the water. I wouldn't drown obviously; I had figured out that I could hold my breath indefinitely. I sat, letting the hot water warm me and I simply relaxed.

I stayed there until almost all the bubbles had gone. The water was slowly beginning to match my own temperature. I stayed, waiting until I was submerged in a freezing cold bath. I considered moving, but honestly it was so peaceful that I didn't want to move. I couldn't hear anything, my eyes were closed and I wasn't breathing. When you are still enough in water it feels like you're floating. I felt like I had no senses at all, such a pleasant change from having pure sensory overload.

I stayed there for goodness knows how long, until my water was moved. I opened my eyes to see a hand dancing across the top of the bathwater. It was Esme. I sat up, looking at her inquisitively.

"Bella, you've been in there for nearly a day. Plus I have some good news. Jasper and Edward are coming home." I wasn't sure what my face portrayed.

"Bella, he feels really bad about what he's done to you. Just give him a chance?" she asked. I didn't mind. The vampire thing was actually really cool. I could live a hundred lives, do a hundred things I hadn't done before, I was better in every way. Just a little lonely.

"You don't have to talk to him, or really be near him, just-"

"Mom I..." I stopped her, then shut up myself. Mom? Renee was my mother. I had just called Esme my mother. She felt like my mother though. Better, since with Renee I had always been the mother figure. "I don't blame him." I finished. I could accept her as a mother.

Esme looked as though she were about to cry, happy tears though. It was then I realised I was naked in cold water, talking to my new mother figure. I hopped out of the bathtub and walked straight to my room, slipping on a simple pair of jeans and a t-shirt, leaving my feet bare. I towel dried my hair and pulled it back into a messy ponytail. I put Edward's iPod back and bolted downstairs, jumping onto the couch, after I had jumped over Emmett. He sensed a game and began tickling me. I kept hitting him, the sound was deafening, as he continued to tickle my ribs. Soon enough we had an audience, and then some. Edward and Jasper had arrived. With one final blow from me Emmett flew across the room, breaking the coffee table.

"Bella!" Esme began scolding, then shut her mouth promptly.

"Sorry. I'll clean it up later." I curtsied to her. She smiled again. I turned to Jasper, who was looking only at Alice. I walked over and punched him in the arm. He snarled, crouching.

"If you ever leave Alice alone that long again I will personally rip you to shreds. She never shuts up." I whined. He instantly relaxed and chuckled, although he was still sensing my discomfort. I hadn't hunted in a long time. Alice started complaining about me and I turned to Edward.

He was staring vehemently at the floor. I walked over to him and ducked my head, to try and see his eyes. He looked at me for a split second and I saw how hungry he was. He was exactly as I remembered him; perfect, god-like. He turned away from me. Obviously I was nothing but a mistake now. I would be the one reminder of his weakness, forever.

"Edward?" his name sounded strange on my tongue. He paused in his retreat. "Want to come hunting with me?"

"No." He replied and walked away. I hadn't realised I was already sad, because suddenly I was almost suicidal. Jasper panicked and tried to calm me. I pushed past him, threw the front door open and I simply began running. I was miles away before someone pinned me to the ground. I flipped over, expecting to see Alice, or Emmett. Edward was holding me to the ground, his black eyes blazing. He didn't speak, simply looked at me. My black eyes stared into his. Mine were red rimmed and his were gold rimmed, but the same hunger was there. Suddenly Jasper was there.

"Damn you two run fast." He said. Edward pulled off of me and began running back. This time I stood and ran after him. After mere seconds I pinned him. He flipped over, surprised and off guard. We both wrestled for a moment, before I – the stronger one – emerged victorious. I had his hands pinned above his head, my legs twisted around his. I was lying on top of him. To the outside observer we would probably look like two teenagers in a frisky make-out session. Edward looked nothing but resigned.

"What have I done to earn such a cold shoulder?" I asked in a small voice. Although I was physically more powerful, he was mentally older than me.

"You're the one blocking your thoughts. I can only imagine the horrible things you must be thinking about me."

"Blocking my thoughts? What makes you think I'm doing that?" I asked, letting go of his arms and legs. I was still straddling him. What a sight we were now.

"I can't hear anything from your mind." He spat. "You have to be blocking me."

"Well I'm not trying to." I stared into his black eyes for a while longer. I owed him some sliver of an explanation. "I don't blame you. I understand, to some degree, the level of control it takes to resist. I wasn't exactly the least appealing target either. I was on the worst day of my cycle and you could probably smell the blood from a mile away. Not to mention Alice said something about my blood appealing to you more than others. How can I possibly blame you?"

Edward stared up at me still.

"I bear no ill will to you or your family. If you don't want me around then I'll leave, but I like it here. Rosalie's a bitch and Emmett never shuts up, but I could see myself here for a while."

"They don't want you to leave." Edward muttered.

"So you do?" If I could've cried I would've been. "I thought so." He opened his mouth to say something, but I cut him off again. "I'll always be a painful reminder of your weakness won't I? Every time you look at me you'll see nothing but a mistake. There's no point in me staying if I'm to be viewed as such."

"I don't view you as that. I view myself as the monster that stole your life from you." His eyes flashed angrily. "I have stolen your family, your friends, your life from you. I am nothing but a monster and should be treated as such."

"I had no friends. My step-father found me nothing but awkward and to my father I was always the little reminder that the one woman he loved walked out on him. He loved me, but I reminded him a lot of Renee. For Pete's sake – I was nothing but a burden. Always. I couldn't walk on a flat surface without finding something to trip over. I am the sole reason the hospitals run 24/7. I am the reason the accident statistics in Phoenix were high. I have had exactly seven hundred and twelve hospital visits. I have broken bones on thirty seven different occasions, had two concussions, multiple sprains and so many cuts and burns you'd think I juggled fireballs and knives for a living." I almost laughed at the image I had just created.

"I couldn't play sports, I was above average in school, but not smart enough to skip. I have no hobbies, no talents except reading and that is hardly an achievement. I have a chance to start over now. I can actually walk without falling. There are so many things I now have the chance to do, and all the time in the world to do it. I lost a small, fractured family and gained a large weird one. You have given me quite possibly the greatest gift any human could hope for. Besides, I can see Charlie again. I know they're safe, safer now that their accident prone daughter is gone. My mother feared for the other passengers on the planes I have taken, in case my luck brought down the plane." I was chuckling now. It was much easier to talk about now. Edward was looking at me curiously.

"You are thankful that you are now a monster also?"

"You think all vampires are monsters?" The dark flash in his eyes gave me my answer.

"What about Carlisle? Esme? Alice?" There was no way he could believe that his own mother, as gentle a soul as she was, could be a monster. What about Alice, the happiest pixie on the planet? I reconsidered, thinking about the shopping she obsessed over. "Well maybe Alice is."

A half smile appeared on his lips, though his eyes were still dark.

"Perhaps." He admitted.

"Please, would you just give me a chance? A chance to prove I can be in your family?" My tone was one of a desperate child now; pleading, soft and sad.

He propped himself up on his elbows, so he was half sitting up. His face was very close to mine now. I was glad he couldn't read my mind. He was beautiful. I wanted to touch his face, run my fingers through his hair, to see if it felt as smooth as it looked. My eyes stayed locked with his. His eyes remained dark, guilt ridden and calculating.

"You will change your mind. You will end up hating me when you begin to miss the things you've mentioned. Especially your family. That will always haunt you, and thus me." He blinked a few times. "You are going to stay then?"

Oh no. The only way I would stay is if I was no inconvenience. I could make this work, I could become a part of this family, it would just take some time. There was no way in hell I would stay if every time Edward looked at me he would flinch or regret what he'd done.

"Only by your request. You are the only one with any objection. And for God's sake don't pity me. Don't tell me to stay simply because you feel guilty. The only way I will stay is if you want me to. As soon as you don't want me I am gone. You created me, you teach me. Understand?" I asked. He nodded solemnly. His face was still emotionless.

"Stay. I will decide after I get to know you. So far you have made nothing but good impressions on my family. Their thoughts are still about you, even Rosalie, although hers are simple insults. Feel lucky. Usually she thinks of nothing but herself." He half-smiled again and I smiled back.

"Wow. Uh, do you need some time alone, or can we go hunting?" Jasper asked, Alice beside him. Her expression was calculating. I looked at the position we were in and was so glad I wasn't human. If I had been, my cheeks would've been as red as a tomato.

As it was, Jasper could feel the embarrassment and Edward, could read his mind, so two of the three people watching already knew. Alice was simply observant, so she probably knew how I felt too. Edward used my moment of distraction to flip me over. He was now on top of me. Again, so glad he couldn't read my mind. He stood up, offering his hand to me.

And then my second hunt began.