"One child abused is one too many." – Gregg Shields
Cautious
One of the first life lessons you learn is that life is most-often unsure; especially as a ward of the foster care system. From birth you have been in the care of women who are not your mother and at the mercy of men who didn't father you. Somehow you miss what you've never had and yearn for a connection; a sense of security; a family.
Instead, you are either wholly ignored by the adults who have taken you in, or you are used as an outlet for their violent wrath. Your hearing becomes exceptionally acute; listening in the dead of night for footsteps in the hall and bracing yourself for what is to come. The soft thuds of the belt as it hurries through each belt loop- the whistle as it displaces the air around it on its way to carving the familiar pattern on your back- such is your nightly lullaby that serenades you until unconsciousness graciously bears you away.
And then one day your unstable world shifts yet again. Tall, strong men with the letters "F", "B", "I" emblazoned on their chests arrest your guardians. Their countenances are sad and their exchanges whispered as they discuss what is to be done with you. A hospital is selected and there some doctors sew up your wounds, while others try to get you to talk about what you've been through.
Days go by until finally one of the doctors smiles and tells you that you'll be going to a new home soon with some very nice people who are to be your parents. As you've never had a home or parents before you shrug apathetically when the social worked asks you what you think of the new arrangements.
The couple you now live with is older with no children of their own and seem nice, but you shrink back at their touch, knowing that some of the cruelest adults are the ones who try to be kind to you at first. As time goes on, however, their affection continues to be genuine and you begin to lower your guard bit by bit until you no longer tense under their hugs or fear the sound of their footsteps in the dark.
Instead, you learn to sleep peacefully, dreaming that one day you will join the men who rescued you and help other people with scars on their backs know that there are safe havens in this unsure world after all.