Disclaimer: I don't own the Teen Titans.

Ch.3

It had been about a year and a half since I was called to Tamaran. I had become much stronger. I was able to handle the stress that being Empress brought much better. I was able to look at the dead bodies falling out of the sky without feeling sympathetic. I was not the wimpy, mentally and emotionally weak Starfire anymore. I was emotionally strong, determined, and knew I could end this war some way and somehow. I do not mention physically strong because I have always been strong.

The war was getting better for Tamaran. Less people were dying and the war was mostly in the sky or remote locations. I was feeling much more optimistic than a year or so ago. I was glad that I was here. I felt needed and wanted. I could not remember feeling more needed than I am now. Blackfire could see that I had become a different person. She said that this was good for me but sometimes she said she missed the old me. How could she miss someone who had been so stupid? I was much more intelligent now. I was able to get more things done. I shook these thoughts out of my head once I signed my name for the final time that day. I no longer complained about my wrist and hand cramping up. I learned to cope with it.

"Starfire!" Blackfire said as she flew into the room.

"What is it?" I asked. I knew my voice did not sound as soft and sweet as it once did. It was much more demanding. I had learned to be more demanding because when I was not, nothing got done.

"You are needed in battle! I don't know why, but the General needs your help to command half of the army for his plan – er your plan to get to outer space." Blackfire explained. I was needed in battle? I remembered only about ten times in Tamaranean history that the Empress went into battle. I guess I was about to make that ten an eleven.

I walked into the room where I had found battle armor for the Empress. I remembered that my mother told me my great great grandmother was the last one to wear this. I hoped it fit. I dusted it off and put it on. It fit perfectly. It was a one piece suit with extra protection around the stomach. The outside felt hard and sturdy but the inside was soft and I was easily able to move around in it. I felt even more important. I was about to help lead the army! I felt fear coming over me, but I quickly pushed it aside with my new found determination. I saw the General and had to speak in Tamaranean for him.

"I am ready." I said. I fixed the crown on my head. I had to wear it. This would make me an obvious target, but I knew I would be able to do anything.

"Good. I am glad that you are going to help. This plan should work. I am skeptical about the strategy though. I have been failing you a lot." My compassionate side took over.

"You have not been failing. You are trying and helping this planet all you can. That is heroic." I complemented him. I saw a smile form on his face.

"Be careful Starfire." Blackfire said to me before I left. "If anything happens, just fly or run away. You won't die and I will make sure of it." She said. I left her in charge of the palace until I got be. She was right. I will not die. I am Starfire, Empress Koriand'r. I will not die. A cannot die. And most importantly, I do not want to die.

I was given orders. I had been so used to giving these orders, not receiving them. However, I knew the General was very skilled and knew exactly what he was doing. He told me and the army that I was going to lead into battle what to do. I had a look of determination on my face. I wanted to prove myself that I was not weak in any way and this was the ultimate test. I led my army to the skies. We began fighting. I shot someone with my gun like weapon. The Psion was falling. I had killed. I had murdered. I had committed a crime in my eyes. However, I had to keep fighting. Psions are very ugly, I must say except there was a young one, he was probably a year younger than me. Before I was about to stab him, he gave me a look of sorrow and grief. He did not want to be there. I could tell by looking in his eyes. I pushed him away and let him go. I was not able to kill him. But-my thoughts were stopped right there. Before I knew it, I was flying through the air uncontrollably. I saw that we were all split up. It was a surprise attack from the Psions. I opened my eyes in time to see that their surprise attack for us wiped out the Psions we were fighting. I made eye contact with the young Psion I saw before and before I knew it, I saw his head snap off and I saw his dark, deep red blood spewing from his neck. I saw this happened to many of the Psions around me, but it was not always a head. Some arms and legs flew through the air. I slammed into a rock. I looked up to the sky and I could only see explosions. I wondered if the Psions plan backfired or was this their plan? I did not know and I could not think about it at the time because I felt blood coming from my head. It was not too bad. I felt lucky. When I went to stand up, I felt excruciating pain through both of my legs. I knew that this was a bad sign. I sat back down. I knew I could not fall asleep because of my head injury. I kept myself awake even though I wanted to sleep off the pain. I looked back up at the sky and began to cry. I hadn't done that in months. I looked back down at the ground and stopped crying. I had to be strong for myself.

"Koriand'r. Come in Koriand'r. I saw the explosion. Are you okay?" I heard my communication device go off. It was the General.

"Yes, I am okay. My legs hurt though. I wish to go back to the palace."

"Okay. I think I can handle this now. The Psions miscalculated where the bomb was to go off. They killed about half their army instead of ours. Most of your sector found me and we are pushing them back into space as we speak. You did an amazing job Empress Koriand'r. I Couldn't have done this without you." I thanked him and he said bye. I was excited. We were finally getting somewhere! My smile faded once I heard someone say in Tameranean,

"Help me please." I flew over, making sure not to land on my feet when I got down to where the voice was. I stayed in the air hovering over a fellow Tamaranean. The sight before me made me fall onto the ground. I carefully sat beside the man. He had a deep gash across his abdomen. One of his legs was a few feet away from him. The blood was coming out like a waterfall. He coughed up some blood. I gently lifted his head onto my thighs. It hurt, but I ignored the pain. There was no way he was going to make it home. I knew that he was to die right there.

"I am here." I whispered.

"Empress Koriand'r?" He gasped for breath. I nodded. I began to cry. "Don't cry."

"I am sorry this has happened to you. May I ask, what is your name?"

"Xyla'nder." He coughed. "I have no one. When I die, bury me here." He was maybe a year or two older than I was. He continued, "I know you're the Empress, but this is my last request."

"I will fulfill your last request." I gently stroked his cheek until he closed his eyes, never to see the world again. I crawled over beside him and began to dig a hole. I used my starbolts to create the hole faster. When I was done, I lifted him and gently placed him into the grave that I dug. I gently put the dirt over him. I broke a piece of rock off and carved his name into it and placed it so that it would not fall over. I had a very hard time flying back because I was so upset. I stayed low to the ground because I kept falling. Once I flew to the palace, Blackfire was there waiting for me. She caught me in her arms before I fell on the hard ground. She carried me to the infirmary.

"What happened to you? There's blood all over you!" She placed me on the bed.

"This…this is not my blood." I explained to her what happened and I began to cry hysterically.

"You shouldn't have gone. I told the General, but he insisted…"

"It is okay. What is done is done. If I was not there, Xyla'nder would not have been properly buried. She nodded.

"Where does it hurt?" She asked, changing the subject.

"Both of my legs."

"Change out of this battle gear." She said, handing me a gown. I did as I was told. The pain became more evident. She took an x ray of my legs. A doctor that we had found a couple months ago came in to determine what should be done.

"They are both broken. You'll need casts all the way up both of your legs for three months. You won't be doing too much walking. I am sorry Empress Koriand'r, but you may not be able to walk as you once did ever again. You may have a slight limp, especially in your right leg." I cried again. I began to realize that I was never emotionally strong. I was always my weak self. I began to give up hope for myself. If I could never walk correctly, was living worth it? What was I saying? Of course it was! Life is so valuable.

I was told to do my work in my room. I was happy about that because I was only in there two or three hours. I was set up in there. Blackfire would be helping out by doing tasks that I could not do. I was also told to relax and get some rest. The war was in Tamaran's favor now so I was finally able to relax without worrying. I glanced around my room. I was alone. I had forgotten how it felt to sit back and relax. I smiled to myself. I looked over and I saw my computer was collecting dust. I had not even thought about cleaning, but now when I thought about it, this room could use a good dusting. However, I could not do this myself. I could not get out of bed unless I had to use the restroom for at least a month. I sighed, but I was kind of happy because I did not have to do much.

I began to have nightmares about the war. Every time I fell asleep I had a dream about Xyla'nder's death. The more I slept, the gorier the death. Then, as weeks went on, the dream got worse and worse. It was not just Xyla'nder's death that a dreamt about anymore, now it was a whole mass of people. These people's names all sounded familiar because I signed their death papers. Anyway, in the dream, I was walking. My casts were gone. I kept walking. I was in a dark cave. It smelled of rotting bodies and I saw the decaying people. One or two crawled over to me and kept saying "Help me" or "End my misery." However, in the dream I could not help them. I just stood there, afraid. Eventually in this dream, blood was falling from the cave. I would look up and see dying bodies losing pools and pools of blood. They would say "Why do you get to live? Just because you are of royal blood?" Then in the dream, I would drown in Tamaranean blood with them laughing at me. In the blood when I opened my eyes, I would see one of four people in it with me, casually waving at me. I could never really make them out. Then, I would scream and wake up. This night, I woke up without screaming. I used my crutches to drag myself across my room. Why did I get to live and they did not? I always questioned this since these dreams. I was no better than the average Tamaranean. I was only lucky because I was born into the royal family.

I opened my drawer. I saw a gold heart on a chain. It was a necklace. I opened it up. It was a locket. There was a picture of all my friends from Earth. Funny, I seemed to have forgotten about them. Tears came to my eyes as I realized that I still care for them. I wondered what they were up to. I put the necklace around my neck. I was such a horrible friend. I had forgotten about them! Why would I let myself forget about the best friends anyone could have? Then I remembered Robin. He was a jerk to me a year ago. I still missed him though. And I think I still loved him. I missed him too much now that I thought about it. My dream! That was them in the blood with me! Raven, Beast Boy, Cyborg, and even Robin. I began to let the tears spill down my face. Oh, how I missed them still. I began to doubt that they missed me. They probably went on with their lives, unlike me who was in casts and was in charge of a whole planet. I was so devastated at this point. I felt like I had to run away. I could not run or fly away. I would be frowned upon. I sat on the floor, not caring that I would not be able to get up later. "Starfire? What are you doing?" It was Blackfire's voice. She knew about the dream. "Did you have that dream again?"

"Yes I did." My voice quivered as I spoke. I felt weak. I felt Blackfire carefully life me up and put me back in bed.

"Everything will be okay." She said as she hugged me. "With the looks of it, the war will end soon. I did the calculations and if we keep making this progress, you can go home to your friends in a month or two. The Psions are close to giving up." She said. I smiled through my tears at this and hugged my sister tightly.

"Thank you so much for helping me get through this." I said to her. "I know that you did not have to stay here with me. I am glad you did." I said to her. I knew that she used to be evil, but I did not see her this way anymore. She was the best sister anyone could ask for. I was glad that she was mine.

"You're welcome. Except if I didn't make those mistakes, Galfore would still be alive and I would be Empress and you wouldn't have had to worry about this war." She began to cry as well.

"Blackfire, it is not your fault." I said. What she said was true, but this war and all of the troubles she caused were not her fault.

"Okay." I knew she was just agreeing with me. Just then, there was an explosion in my room. I fell from my bed and I could not see Blackfire. However, I did see the letter Raven gave to me when I left my home. I put it in my pocket. I crawled around on the floor to find Blackfire. I screamed when I saw her. Blood. There was a lot of her blood on my carpet. I got over to her. "I'll be okay." She coughed. I picked her up and flew her to the infirmary. I placed her on the bed and the doctor began to stitch her up. I was crying. Why was my life like this? I was only eighteen and so much has already happened to me. More bad than good. I sat in a wheelchair outside of the room.

"Come in Koriand'r." I heard my communication device go off. I answered it.

"Y-yes General?" I asked.

"I heard about the explosion. Are you okay?"

"I am, but Blackfire is being tended to. I do not know whether or not if she is okay." I said.

"That explosion happened because the Psions are trying to get to you, but we defeated that ship! We have only one more to defeat! We are almost victorious!" I was so excited, but the sadness about my sister took over. I said good bye to the General once the doctor came out to tell me about Blackfire's condition. I was told that she lost so much blood, but she was alive. She would be okay after a few weeks of rest. I went in there and hugged her. I thought I was going to lose her. If I lost Blackfire, I did not know what I would do. I cried tears of joy. She was okay. She was okay!

"I thought you were gone." I cried.

"You can't get rid of me that easily." She joked. I smiled and gave her another hug and she hugged me back.

Blackfire and I healed together. She was better faster than I was though. Once those casts were off, I was so happy. I went through a lot of physical therapy. I was walking again, but I had to wear metal braces on my legs to help support my bones in my legs because they were crushed when I was hurt. They would never completely heal. That saddened me because when I was to return home, I would need assistance. I had to use crutches for the rest of my life; they were the ones that wrap around one's wrists. I was crippled for life. I was just gracious that I was able to live.

I walked outside for the first time, knowing that the war was over. The Psions were defeated. Tamaran was victorious. The smell outside was not too pleasant though. It smelled of death. I smelled the blood in the air, but I knew that Tamaran and the people were finally safe. I was told I had to make a speech to all of Tamaran. Blackfire was going to be right beside me the whole time. I was pleased to know this because I was emotionally scarred for life, or so I felt this way. If Blackfire was not going to be there, I would probably break down. I went up to the podium and I saw people that stood before me.

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