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Dance In The Dark
The moon lights away while he's howling at him.
It happened again.
And this time he didn't stop, until he drew blood.
----
Knock.
No.
Knock.
Oh, please, no.
Knock.
Not him.
"Yuugi?"
I don't answer.
I hold my breath.
I pretend I'm not home.
"Yuugi, I know you're in there."
My heart skips a beat.
"Open the door."
No.
"Now."
I think about ignoring him.
But I know Atem.
He won't go away.
He'll stand outside my door all night if he has to.
He's stubborn.
And, God, I love him so much.
"Coming," I say loud enough for him to hear.
I quickly throw on a sweatshirt.
I cover myself so that he can't see the reason I've been avoiding him for the past week.
I cover myself so that he can't see the pain written all over my body.
"Hey," I say when I open the door.
He looks down at me with a firm expression.
His eyes narrow on mine.
He knows.
"Yuugi," he says. "Where have you been? I've been calling all week."
"Oh, yeah. I've been busy. School and all. I'm sorry I haven't returned your calls."
I lie to him, even though we both already know the truth.
I lie, because I have to.
"I see," he says.
He nods his head towards me.
"Well. Aren't you going to let me in?"
"Oh, uh, I was just about to head to bed, actually." I'm stalling. "Can we talk tomorrow?"
He looks away from me and shakes his head.
He smiles a bit, disappointed that he was stupid enough to believe me in the first place.
He was.
"You didn't leave him."
Not a question.
A statement.
A fact.
"Atem," I sigh.
I can't even look at him in the eye.
"I've had a really long day," I continue. "Can this wait?"
"No, Yuugi," he says, pinning me with a glare. "It can't wait."
"Well, it's gonna have to."
I try to close the door, but he sticks his foot inside and stops it.
"Oh, hell no, do you think you're getting out of this conversation this time," he says.
He pushes his way in.
I take a step back.
"Atem, stop."
"No."
He makes a grab for me.
But I take another step back, before he can reach me.
"You promised me, Yuugi."
He stands in front of me.
And I feel the anger and hate and pure rage pouring out of him.
I know it's not for me.
But I feel like it should be.
"You promised me you'd leave him."
"Atem -- "
"Goddamnit, Yuugi."
He reaches for me again.
And this time, I don't have time to move away.
He grabs my wrist and pulls me towards him.
And I fight him the whole way, because I know what he's going to do.
"Let me go, Atem."
"Not this time," he says.
He pulls at my sweater.
And I feel the cold air in the room prick at my skin when he rips it over my head.
And now I'm exposed.
And Atem's eyes are the size of mine.
His ruby gaze is searching me.
Tracing my skin.
Piercing my soul.
And I've never felt so ugly.
I don't even realize I'm crying.
"Happy now?" I yell at him.
His eyes find mine again.
And he looks like he wants to cry, too.
"Oh, God, Yuugi."
He touches my cheek.
He traces my chin.
He raises my head so that we're eye to eye.
"Why did you go back to him?" he whispers.
I yank my chin from his grasp.
"Because I didn't have anywhere else to go!"
"You could have came to me!" he tells me.
"No, I couldn't have," I say quietly. "You're too busy with your girlfriend."
He stops.
Everything goes perfectly still.
Even I heard the bitterness in my words.
It was practically seeping out of my pores.
"What's that supposed to mean?" he finally asks me.
"I..."
I love you is what I should have said.
I want you to stay with me.
I can't leave unless I know that you're gonna be there to catch me when I fall.
Not as a friend.
But as a lover.
As a soulmate.
As my everything.
But, of course, I never say the things I should.
"I just miss you... I feel like I don't see you as much anymore."
Something in Atem's eyes dim at my words.
Disappointment?
Why would he -- ?
"I'm sorry," he says, looking away. "I thought you were going to say..."
He shakes his head.
And then he looks back at me.
"Nevermind."
"What?"
"Forget it, Yuugi."
"...Okay." I shift my weight onto one leg. "So -- "
"You're leaving him."
"Atem -- "
"Yuugi."
He takes me into his arms and kisses the top of my head.
It makes me shudder.
I want this forever.
"If you don't leave him," he murmurs to me, "then I won't be able to stop myself."
He leans back to look at me.
"If I ever see you like this again..."
He touches the large bruise on my chest with his fingertips.
"...I'll kill him."
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